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2015 Recap
9 years ago
I'm not going to ramble too much about 2015... I don't really usually do these sorts of posts, anyway. I just feel like 2015 was a year that deserved a small overview, in hindsight. And it's not like many people will read this, anyway, amid all the other New Year posts that will be swarming FA. If anything, this will just be more for my reference, in the future, when I ponder what my outlook was at this point in time.
I don't know how to feel about 2015, as a whole... in some ways, I almost feel like there was more bad than good. I ended a relationship of 2 years, with someone I'd known for almost 7... I lost quite a few good friends, or at least people I considered to be good friends... I learned that I have a bad tendency to get too attached to people who don't think of me as anything but a number, essentially. In the end of all that, I get the sense that I'm finishing 2015 much more cynical than I started it... I'm much more wary of who I devote my time and attention to... and I come across as picky and ill-tempered to those who think I shouldn't worry so much about how others interact with me. But my general view, at this point, is that... if someone shows they'll put forth time/effort to be my friend, I'll return that gladly. If they don't... I have no sense of obligation to try and salvage a relationship wherein I'm doing most of the work. Numerous friendships of mine died, this year, for this very reason. It hurts... a lot... but I don't know if it hurts more than trying and trying to interact with individuals who had better things and people to occupy their time.
On the up side, I do still have some people left who are steadfast and enjoyable... people who have proven their friendship and still go out of their way to talk with me, no matter how busy they may be, to show they still care... and that's reassuring. I reacquainted myself with some old friends this year, which has been refreshing, and it's also made me feel more like I should really try to introduce myself to people more than I do... even if I've subsequently discovered that people who -say- they want to meet and talk to others don't always -mean- that. I also got myself a puppy in the spring, and he just turned 1 year old here a couple weeks ago. He's been keeping me very busy, and even if it's been trying at times, I still adore him so. ^^
Finally, regarding my music... I sadly don't get the opportunity to play much, anymore. I haven't really devoted the time to trying to record anything, because at this point my 7 year old computer is getting far too unstable, and I'm afraid of putting effort into musical endeavours that will only be lost if something goes wrong, as it has in the past. Sooo... will there be more music from me? Someday, yes... I'd like to think so. When I have a new computer that has more stability and capability. When that will be, I don't know. But don't think that I've abandoned this place or my music.
For 2016, I have no real hopes or goals... I just want to be a better individual, and be able to move on from the shortcomings of others. No, I won't be "popufur"... but if being such requires me to have a bunch of shallow, meaningless relationships... I'll remain my mundane, unknown self, thanks. ^^
How about all of you? If you read through all of that and you're still here... how was your 2015? What do you have lined up for 2016?
I don't know how to feel about 2015, as a whole... in some ways, I almost feel like there was more bad than good. I ended a relationship of 2 years, with someone I'd known for almost 7... I lost quite a few good friends, or at least people I considered to be good friends... I learned that I have a bad tendency to get too attached to people who don't think of me as anything but a number, essentially. In the end of all that, I get the sense that I'm finishing 2015 much more cynical than I started it... I'm much more wary of who I devote my time and attention to... and I come across as picky and ill-tempered to those who think I shouldn't worry so much about how others interact with me. But my general view, at this point, is that... if someone shows they'll put forth time/effort to be my friend, I'll return that gladly. If they don't... I have no sense of obligation to try and salvage a relationship wherein I'm doing most of the work. Numerous friendships of mine died, this year, for this very reason. It hurts... a lot... but I don't know if it hurts more than trying and trying to interact with individuals who had better things and people to occupy their time.
On the up side, I do still have some people left who are steadfast and enjoyable... people who have proven their friendship and still go out of their way to talk with me, no matter how busy they may be, to show they still care... and that's reassuring. I reacquainted myself with some old friends this year, which has been refreshing, and it's also made me feel more like I should really try to introduce myself to people more than I do... even if I've subsequently discovered that people who -say- they want to meet and talk to others don't always -mean- that. I also got myself a puppy in the spring, and he just turned 1 year old here a couple weeks ago. He's been keeping me very busy, and even if it's been trying at times, I still adore him so. ^^
Finally, regarding my music... I sadly don't get the opportunity to play much, anymore. I haven't really devoted the time to trying to record anything, because at this point my 7 year old computer is getting far too unstable, and I'm afraid of putting effort into musical endeavours that will only be lost if something goes wrong, as it has in the past. Sooo... will there be more music from me? Someday, yes... I'd like to think so. When I have a new computer that has more stability and capability. When that will be, I don't know. But don't think that I've abandoned this place or my music.
For 2016, I have no real hopes or goals... I just want to be a better individual, and be able to move on from the shortcomings of others. No, I won't be "popufur"... but if being such requires me to have a bunch of shallow, meaningless relationships... I'll remain my mundane, unknown self, thanks. ^^
How about all of you? If you read through all of that and you're still here... how was your 2015? What do you have lined up for 2016?
Help! I need a cure!
At least I'm not in Africa/Syria/etc, can always be worse etc, be happy with what little you have etc.
Yeah try not to be cynical, doesn't help anything.
If it weren't for my 2 dogs, I'd be 200% more unbearable to people lol.