my gallery has been lacking lately,
as in no uploading
and i've just been really quiet overall

i haven't worked on owed commissions
nor have i contacted anyone about any of my personal mess that is preventing me from doing such

this is all awful on my part,
even if i've been dealing with a lot,
but i feel like i have no reason to have let this happen in the first place??

i think i've reached the climax of uh..
my shitty stress, though (i hope, anyways)

because i attempted to commit suicide (while i was partially coherent- and then i fell into full blown psychotic episode) on the 14th and that landed me in the E.R (my brother found me unconscious on the floor, despite me doing this at like 5-6 am)
i was then admitted into the psych ward and stayed there for a little over a week

i got out today,
not that long ago

it wasn't really all that fun,
because there was SO MUCH group therapy and i'm extremely afraid of people,
but i managed to muscle through all of it and actually learned some uhm... really valuable things

however,
before i had even reached this point,
i had been dealing with other things
like how i got surgery last year at the end of november
(i thought it was all going well, but now the wound/scar reopened two days ago and is now draining/bleeding and really painful fml.. so i'm headed back to square 1 again ;/ )

i still have other health and mental problems to take care of, but
i'm trying my best to regroup myself

the attempt was so sudden, but i was so ready to go
there's other more personal things hurting me, too..

idk...
i feel awful because people are probably mad at me for taking so long, too
and i need to refund
which leads me to mention this,

if you're interested in adopts OR coloured, sketchy head shots,
please go to the link below~ ;o:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7311873/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7311873/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7311873/

thank you so much
for the patience and everything else,
it means a lot and helps to keep my anxieties down

if i owe you a commission,
please feel free to note me if you'd like a refund!

i'm trying to raise the money rn,
so that i can make everyone happy

and if it's possible,
please try not to... be too mad at me when noting or commenting...
high stress situations scare me to death and make me so much more ill aaa...;;;

anyways..
i hope everyone is doing okay!!
i missed being around sm