FA+
Shop
For those still looking over here...
9 years ago
Hi! I figured I'd check in and let you peeps know I'm still alive and all. Maybe answer a few FAQs while I'm at it. Like...
---
Hey K'sharra, are you ever gonna start drawing again?
Probably not. At least, not furry stuff. It was fun and all, but I don't really get any enjoyment out of it anymore. I've found other means of personal expression and creative outlets that are less frustrating and more fulfilling to me.
I was never happy with how my drawings came out, I never felt really fulfilled as a furry artist. I always felt my work was substandard, especially as the fandom became inundated with waves of younger, more talented, more enterprising artists with more time on their hands to practice and more patience to keep the art flowing. There's not really any place for me anymore.
---
Oh come on, you've had slumps before, you'll be back.
I don't know. I keep coming back to the site to look at art and see if maybe I can be inspired again. It used to be that looking through other artists' work would inspire me to do my own stuff, but... I don't feel that anymore. And I don't really want to, you know? The outside pressure of people wanting me to draw things for them. The internal pressure of never living up to my own high standards and never being able to adequately express myself on the page. It's not worth it to me. I'm a sad, broken has-been that just wants to stop trying and making myself miserable, and just go do something else.
---
So if you're not drawing, what ARE you doing?
Well, for one, I have a YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/RandomKittenGaming - For some reason, over a thousand people like watching me play video games. I don't get it either, but feel free to give it a watch and see if it's amusing.
I also fiddle around with making jewelry. I have several Viking knit bracelets up on my Etsy shop at https://www.etsy.com/shop/LARPkittenDesigns and I'm looking at experimenting with Tagua nut pendants here soon, much like the ones
foxfeather does, but somewhat different.
I've also been knitting and crocheting. I have my own Doctor Who scarf that I made myself, and I'm halfway through a Yoda amigurumi for a friend. I do leatherwork; I made a great medieval belt pouch with ivy leaves carved on it for wearing to Renaissance faires. I've got my sumi e ink paintings, which I've posted a couple in my gallery here so you can see some examples.
I have no shortage of things to fill my time. In fact, quite the opposite: I have too many things to do and not enough time to do all the things I enjoy!
---
Do you still go to furry cons?
That's... kind of up in the air right now, really. For one, I'm too fat to comfortably fit in most airplane seats now. (I'm talking to my doctor about the whole weight gain thing - I've gained 100 lbs in the past 3 years, and that's a bit excessive.) For two, now that I no longer draw, I don't know what to do with myself at cons. I'm not much of a dancer anymore, nor much of a shopper or art collector, I don't fursuit, none of the panels ever interest me, so I wind up usually just aimlessly wandering the Dealer's Den over and over again talking to artists that I like and/or look up to. That's not really worth the hundreds of dollars for attendance, transport, food, and hotel room.
I used to go to Rainfurrest because it was local and a lot of local friends went, but thanks to the combination of a terrible overhaul in how the Dealer's Den tables were managed, driving away several of my friends because they could no longer afford to attend because they couldn't get a table, and a bunch of drunken irresponsible brainless sots wrecking the hotel and forcing a change in venue that's a few hours' drive away over the mountain passes instead of conveniently close to home, I probably won't go to that one now either.
---
Can I message you for a conversation?
No, I'm pretty anti-social nowadays. Well, not anti-social. In fact, I'm a little TOO social, because I'm a huge introvert that loves quiet moments at home, but I still manage to have two tabletop gaming nights a week, a girls' night where we go out to the bar and play pool, weekend gaming nights that I often don't attend because I need some downtime... I don't have much time or energy left for chatting. I don't even have much interesting to say. I have a pretty dull life right now.
---
So hopefully that's answered some of the questions I get every now and again. I'm sorry I don't have news about upcoming art or anything exciting for you guys like that. Thanks for dropping in, feel free to fave any of my art, I'm not about to take it down any time soon. Have a nice day.
---
Hey K'sharra, are you ever gonna start drawing again?
Probably not. At least, not furry stuff. It was fun and all, but I don't really get any enjoyment out of it anymore. I've found other means of personal expression and creative outlets that are less frustrating and more fulfilling to me.
I was never happy with how my drawings came out, I never felt really fulfilled as a furry artist. I always felt my work was substandard, especially as the fandom became inundated with waves of younger, more talented, more enterprising artists with more time on their hands to practice and more patience to keep the art flowing. There's not really any place for me anymore.
---
Oh come on, you've had slumps before, you'll be back.
I don't know. I keep coming back to the site to look at art and see if maybe I can be inspired again. It used to be that looking through other artists' work would inspire me to do my own stuff, but... I don't feel that anymore. And I don't really want to, you know? The outside pressure of people wanting me to draw things for them. The internal pressure of never living up to my own high standards and never being able to adequately express myself on the page. It's not worth it to me. I'm a sad, broken has-been that just wants to stop trying and making myself miserable, and just go do something else.
---
So if you're not drawing, what ARE you doing?
Well, for one, I have a YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/RandomKittenGaming - For some reason, over a thousand people like watching me play video games. I don't get it either, but feel free to give it a watch and see if it's amusing.
I also fiddle around with making jewelry. I have several Viking knit bracelets up on my Etsy shop at https://www.etsy.com/shop/LARPkittenDesigns and I'm looking at experimenting with Tagua nut pendants here soon, much like the ones
foxfeather does, but somewhat different. I've also been knitting and crocheting. I have my own Doctor Who scarf that I made myself, and I'm halfway through a Yoda amigurumi for a friend. I do leatherwork; I made a great medieval belt pouch with ivy leaves carved on it for wearing to Renaissance faires. I've got my sumi e ink paintings, which I've posted a couple in my gallery here so you can see some examples.
I have no shortage of things to fill my time. In fact, quite the opposite: I have too many things to do and not enough time to do all the things I enjoy!
---
Do you still go to furry cons?
That's... kind of up in the air right now, really. For one, I'm too fat to comfortably fit in most airplane seats now. (I'm talking to my doctor about the whole weight gain thing - I've gained 100 lbs in the past 3 years, and that's a bit excessive.) For two, now that I no longer draw, I don't know what to do with myself at cons. I'm not much of a dancer anymore, nor much of a shopper or art collector, I don't fursuit, none of the panels ever interest me, so I wind up usually just aimlessly wandering the Dealer's Den over and over again talking to artists that I like and/or look up to. That's not really worth the hundreds of dollars for attendance, transport, food, and hotel room.
I used to go to Rainfurrest because it was local and a lot of local friends went, but thanks to the combination of a terrible overhaul in how the Dealer's Den tables were managed, driving away several of my friends because they could no longer afford to attend because they couldn't get a table, and a bunch of drunken irresponsible brainless sots wrecking the hotel and forcing a change in venue that's a few hours' drive away over the mountain passes instead of conveniently close to home, I probably won't go to that one now either.
---
Can I message you for a conversation?
No, I'm pretty anti-social nowadays. Well, not anti-social. In fact, I'm a little TOO social, because I'm a huge introvert that loves quiet moments at home, but I still manage to have two tabletop gaming nights a week, a girls' night where we go out to the bar and play pool, weekend gaming nights that I often don't attend because I need some downtime... I don't have much time or energy left for chatting. I don't even have much interesting to say. I have a pretty dull life right now.
---
So hopefully that's answered some of the questions I get every now and again. I'm sorry I don't have news about upcoming art or anything exciting for you guys like that. Thanks for dropping in, feel free to fave any of my art, I'm not about to take it down any time soon. Have a nice day.
Plus, any time I see an image and thing "I could do better", it initiates that drive to draw something and try out different styles or techniques. I guess I'm 2 ways to Fucked Ville as far as this fandom goes, but everyone either stays or leaves, and this isn't the only subject matter I like to draw either.
... So yeah, I just spent this comment flailing my tiger paws around. Still, you are alive, and doing stuff you enjoy, which is pretty much all you can ask for. :3
I notice you used to play Minecraft. I've got a public pack on the ATLauncher called ShneekeyCraft. Feel free to check it out if you want. I can also customize you a pack to suit your preferences if you prefer.
Good to hear from you again.
If you ever decide to start up a Minecraft LP, let me know, and I can throw a custom pack together for you, since I have several years experience in making and maintaining mod packs. Otherwise, do whatcha want, when ya want, who ya want... and don't let anybody try to pressure you into doing squat.
As far as my fav pieces of yours, I've always loved this one http://www.furaffinity.net/view/382206/ even though at this point it's old as dirt. Are there problems with it? Sure there are, but the good things about the picture well outweigh those. The pose and the bonds really speak to me, the expression is really awesome, and the shapes, even if they aren't anatomically perfect, are really well expressed. When I look at that picture I really feel drawn into it; I find my imagination wandering, picturing myself in the scene either as the viewer, or in her place.
And then there's this piece here http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10083352/ where again, the forms are just so well expressed. I feel like I could reach right out and touch her silky fur, running my hands over her ever so slightly plush curves. I won't bore you with all the dirty thoughts it inspires and just say that the picture really inspires my imagination to pretend that it could be real.
Art is a continual journey. In every piece you do you try something, figure out if it works or not, and try to apply what you learned to the next piece. Sometimes the things you try work out well, and sometimes they don't, but you get some art in the end and just because it isn't good enough to meet the goals you set out when you started the piece doesn't mean it isn't good enough to make the world a prettier place.
I don't want you to feel that I'm trying to guilt you back into doing art. You need to find the path through life that makes you happiest. I'd only encourage you to not to be put off by feelings of dissatisfaction with the work you create (be it art or otherwise). That dissatisfaction is just a sign that you're still finding ways you can improve.
Thank you for all that you gave us over the years! I hope you get new challenges and satisfactions - and it looks like you already have. :x)
Plus, you gave us Clamentine. That's also a win, of sorts. I still remember that stream... Good memories. *hugs*
At the very least, I wish you well with your future endeavors.
But glad to see you holdin' up!
On point number 4, I'm not an artist, don't have a fursuit, and don't have the money to blow in the art show and all that, but I've enjoyed three conventions, even driving across the country for Anthrocon in 2013. It's not about showing off, its about the experience, seeing internet friends in person, and taking a break from the real world.
Thank you for the art you have shared and I wish you all the best.
But if it's not making you happy, then forget it. And if Furry doesn't make you happy, forget that, too. We're people, we change. You won't be any one thing forever. I used to be into ElfQuest! I still consider myself a Science Fiction fan, although I'm far from even a passifan these days. I was into Anime once and lately I followed series that have Furry-ish content, or that I used to follow through the old C/FO... until I moved and my 'Net connection downgraded; it's slow now even for YT, NVM Monster Musume! (I don't care if she's a snake, I like Miia!) Instead I write Furry porn and dammit, I'm good at it! But I've been a Furry for more than fifteen years now. In a couple of years, maybe I'll be into something else, as well or instead.
My point is, I'm sorry to see you leave Furry, but I really like you and I want you to be happy. If you're happier post-Furry, well then... *ker-HUGZ!!!* ...go in peace, pretty tigress. Farewell, where ever you fare. Oh...
It’s Dangerous to go Alone! Take This
I also hear you on the whole social thing there... I'm the same-way myself but yeah, thanks for the art.
I liked it (and I still do) :(
Don't swear off furry art, but don't force it either. If it happens, great, if not, no pressure. Just loved seeing how awesome your work is, whether or not you liked it yourself.
Haven't rightly been to a con myself in about a decade now. F#@%'in stalkers.
Hopefully things sort themselves out, huh?
Also hope things are otherwise awesome for ya.
I understand everything you've said. Your work is definitely among my favorites—the gryphon drawing in sand is one of my best originals out of all the art I own—so you are tops in my book, even if you're mostly "retired" from all of this. Perhaps someday you'll have an urge to come back, but even if you don't, you sound very much at peace with where you are and there can be little more important than that.
I look forward to seeing you again at a con or in some other context, someday. It's always been a pleasure.