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Been Fed To The Marmiliser!!!
9 years ago
*deep sigh* Hey guys, just thought I would update my journal since it's been a while since my last entry.
ConFurgence came and went and sadly it was one of the worst cons I had been too, aside from Melbourne ComicCon 2014.
What made it so bad was the people who attended the con, not the con ops, volunteers or conchairs but the people. They were particularly horrible this year. So excluding, I spent most of the time alone, which sucked. But aw well, hopefully FurDU will be better.
Other than that I have felt really uninspired lately. Nothing is sparking my interests. I am unhappy in my relationship, it seems like it's a one way street and that the only thing that matters is what my partner wants to do, nothing I want gets done. It's constantly about him all the time, I can't tell him of my problems because he turns them into a pity party for himself or worse he just doesn't listen.
I feel constantly pressured to be a gamer because he gets shitty if I don't jump around in excitement about video games, I'm not a gamer AT ALL but he keeps trying to turn me into one, he is STILL horribly anti-furry which hurts because furry is a big part of who I am as a person but he tries to change that about me too.
I told him of a childhood dream I've had for ages and he laughed at me and called it 'gay', I have to drive him around everywhere and he constantly expects me to drop everything I am doing to haul his ass out of the shit. He has stolen money from my savings because he goes stupid with his money, I have had to buy his medication for him and pay for his public transport fees numerous times.
Is this what a relationship is supposed to be? One person gets treated like a god while the other becomes a doormat? If it is I am not sure I want to be in a relationship.
He talks about his ex with a lot more love than he does about me anyways.
Other than that I have been feeling really depressed, I feel like I'm slipping down the eating disorder road again. But I can't tell anyone cuz they don't care.
I'd be happier just continuing to chase after Skrillex, at least I don't have a chance with him so i'll never get hurt by him.
I don't know, just done being treated like I'm disposable and exploited.
Sorry for the pity party, you guys probably don't care anymore than anyone else.
~Scatta
ConFurgence came and went and sadly it was one of the worst cons I had been too, aside from Melbourne ComicCon 2014.
What made it so bad was the people who attended the con, not the con ops, volunteers or conchairs but the people. They were particularly horrible this year. So excluding, I spent most of the time alone, which sucked. But aw well, hopefully FurDU will be better.
Other than that I have felt really uninspired lately. Nothing is sparking my interests. I am unhappy in my relationship, it seems like it's a one way street and that the only thing that matters is what my partner wants to do, nothing I want gets done. It's constantly about him all the time, I can't tell him of my problems because he turns them into a pity party for himself or worse he just doesn't listen.
I feel constantly pressured to be a gamer because he gets shitty if I don't jump around in excitement about video games, I'm not a gamer AT ALL but he keeps trying to turn me into one, he is STILL horribly anti-furry which hurts because furry is a big part of who I am as a person but he tries to change that about me too.
I told him of a childhood dream I've had for ages and he laughed at me and called it 'gay', I have to drive him around everywhere and he constantly expects me to drop everything I am doing to haul his ass out of the shit. He has stolen money from my savings because he goes stupid with his money, I have had to buy his medication for him and pay for his public transport fees numerous times.
Is this what a relationship is supposed to be? One person gets treated like a god while the other becomes a doormat? If it is I am not sure I want to be in a relationship.
He talks about his ex with a lot more love than he does about me anyways.
Other than that I have been feeling really depressed, I feel like I'm slipping down the eating disorder road again. But I can't tell anyone cuz they don't care.
I'd be happier just continuing to chase after Skrillex, at least I don't have a chance with him so i'll never get hurt by him.
I don't know, just done being treated like I'm disposable and exploited.
Sorry for the pity party, you guys probably don't care anymore than anyone else.
~Scatta
As for the gaming part, forcing someone to do something they do not like is horrible. And hating what you like to do most and trying to convince you to stop it is even worst. Relationships is all about understanding one another and helping each other at hard times. Seems like his just using you for his own pleasure without even bothering about you. He might be loving sometimes and supportive but that may just be for show. People can be cunning sometimes. good on the outside but horrible on the inside.
If he continues this attitude, just end the relationship. It may be hard at the beginning, you can always talk to me or your other closer friends. I am worried that you will suffer even more in the future as I have seen many relationships ending badly.
I shall make your Furdu experience this time a great one! :)