FA+
Shop
Emotional Vent Journal
9 years ago
If each of my followers gave a dollar a month, I could quit my dayjob! Consider supporting me via Ko-Fi, or FA Shinies!
You can also buy buy my stories on Payhip!
My Bluesky
You can also buy buy my stories on Payhip!
My Bluesky
So I recently put together that I'm in love with someone.
It's been a wild ride. Constant ups and downs emotionally that I've never had before. I had long since convinced myself that with my autism, I never could feel this sort of love for a person. Guess I was wrong.
I don't think it'll work out, to be honest. I see no signs of reciprocation in the slightest. That's the worst part of all these feelings, is that my reason is pointing in another direction. But, beggars can't be choosers.
In a twist of irony though, I've determined I will probably only fall in love with someone who has autism, because of the great passion that it instills in those who have it. I likewise crave the intelligence that tends to follow from it. Of course, go figure, those of us with autism tend to be emotionally... different, to say the least, so that hampers the chance of reciprocation even further.
This is to say nothing of similar interests. I find it hard to fathom a boyfriend who does not share my interests in vore, the furry fandom or games in particular. This is to say nothing of appreciation for Rule 34. I'm weird and any boyfriend will probably have to be as well.
Needless to say, I'm in somewhat of an unstable state right now. I wish I was more sociable so that I wouldn't be in this situation. Only one person in all my 23 years has triggered this strange sensation within me, and I wish I knew more people so that I had more options. It's odd to have money saved up after so many years of work, and yet feel the urge to blow it all on someone just to ensure their happiness. Especially when you're convinced you're just a speck on their radar.
Such is life though, right?
It's been a wild ride. Constant ups and downs emotionally that I've never had before. I had long since convinced myself that with my autism, I never could feel this sort of love for a person. Guess I was wrong.
I don't think it'll work out, to be honest. I see no signs of reciprocation in the slightest. That's the worst part of all these feelings, is that my reason is pointing in another direction. But, beggars can't be choosers.
In a twist of irony though, I've determined I will probably only fall in love with someone who has autism, because of the great passion that it instills in those who have it. I likewise crave the intelligence that tends to follow from it. Of course, go figure, those of us with autism tend to be emotionally... different, to say the least, so that hampers the chance of reciprocation even further.
This is to say nothing of similar interests. I find it hard to fathom a boyfriend who does not share my interests in vore, the furry fandom or games in particular. This is to say nothing of appreciation for Rule 34. I'm weird and any boyfriend will probably have to be as well.
Needless to say, I'm in somewhat of an unstable state right now. I wish I was more sociable so that I wouldn't be in this situation. Only one person in all my 23 years has triggered this strange sensation within me, and I wish I knew more people so that I had more options. It's odd to have money saved up after so many years of work, and yet feel the urge to blow it all on someone just to ensure their happiness. Especially when you're convinced you're just a speck on their radar.
Such is life though, right?
I'm glad you're alright.