sorry here's a bit of a vent since im kinda feeling pretty dang bad
it's just like
my dad started drinking again and it's really straining things because he's smoking again too
and my sister and her husband canceled on me for something i was really looking forward to because they splurge a lot and spent up all their money
and she said she would give me her old phone because she doesn't use it anymore and it's in like perfect condition and we don't have the money to get me a new one and i've been using like one of those keyboard phones for a couple years and it's pretty much useless it only sends messages half the time and sometimes i dont even get calls or messages until hours later and
i'm just really tired and stressed and tonights my buddys birthday party and i cant go because it's an hour drive and i dont drive and i can't do that to my mom because she has chronic pain and it would fuck up her back to drive for 4 hours (there and back, twice)
and im just rly tired okay and I'm tired of never having money i'm so tired of living paycheck to paycheck and im going to try and get a job but im useless lmao