For four nights I turned, reveling in the habits and desires of the beastly form that I find myself afflicted by. I intended to return home, but the pull of the moon threatened at every turn to make me into a monster again. I retreated to the abandoned bandit camp along the coast, which I had found on my trip to Dawnstar. Only with the passing of the twin full moons did I feel myself freed to return to my normal life, and even then I retreated to Dawnstar first.

I spoke to Erandur about unusual conditions, asking about Lycanthropy, Vampirism and even Corprus. I wanted to cover my tracks, hide the truth as best I could, but I think he suspected. He couldn't tell me one way or another how to possibly cure the condition, although he did suggest trying at the Mage College, or asking around with the intellectuals in Solitude. Disheartening, but better than no answer at all.

I find myself feeling strangely calm after all was said and done. The killings have passed, and though I know that I couldn't control myself at the time I feel that my control and memories have strengthened when in the Wolf form. I recall more, and had more say in what I did and where I went. Only a handful of bandits ended up suffering in my later transformations, and in the end I feel that I managed to keep the beast in check.

This is something I have to live with for now, until I can find a proper solution. At the very least I can learn to make it work for me rather than against me. Evidently feeding as the Wolf strengthens me, gives me renewed vigor and hardiness. It also seems to heal any injuries I may have sustained, as a run in with a Frosbite Spider ended with a nasty bite which was healed after the full moon transformation on the third night.

I also find another odd benefit: Wolves no longer approach me with hostility. In fact, an entire pack of them seemed drawn to me, staying close by while I rested. When I awoke one of them, a big brute of a male, had nestled down next to the fire and stayed while the rest of the pack had moved on. I find that Meeko, upon my return home, also seems completely fine with me. I had feared my dear pup would turn on me, but not only does he seem calm as ever, but he and the wolf seem to be fast friends.

At least I don't have to deal with this problem alone...I'll continue my investigation in how to purify myself of this curse soon. For now, I need to rest and gather my wits. My return was greeted by my Steward, with an absolute ream of scrolls requesting aid from "The Hero of Morthal."

I'm going to be busy.