This morning my father died.

Hes been ill for many years, fighting the disease that was consuming him, a cancer called lymphoma, but its overwhelmed him.

My dad.. was the biggest inspiration in my life, for many a year the most important vision I had. I wanted to be just like him, I wanted to know the things he knew, see the things he'd seen, do the things he'd done. But most of all I wanted to make him proud of me, I wanted so very very badly for him to look upon me and be proud to call me his son.

I don't think I have lived upto it, I don't think I have been all I could have been. But now, for my dad who I feel is looking over us all from whatever place he now resides. I wish to live upto that vision. I wish to become everything my father was. And if I succeed to even become half of the man he was. Even If I just gain a faint element of my father within me. I will have become a great man. A man to be admired, not as a powerful man or a successful man. But as a man that can be looked upto because of how giving and caring they are. A man that can be relied upon. A man like my father.

Many will mourn his passing, and I feel I wont ever get over the event myself. But I will remember him for the best of him. and I will always love him for making me proud to call him dad.

I don't know why I have wrote all this here.. or even if it will be read. I guess I just needed to tell someone, anyone, about how great a man my dad was to me. And how broken I now feel.