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Void If exist
9 years ago
Im in a room, A quaint place, wooden floors, casual furnishings, nothing particularly abstract. I convince myself im in a room of my house. I pressed my head against the semi textured wall, this state inevitably brings an audio effect which can only be described as a sort of ambient harp or some kind of spring, that comes from nowhere in particular, and seems to permeate everything. Sudden noises caused by my own thoughts, or the voices, or speaking, make it stop only for it to creep back again. There is a very rapid change in my perception, like some perceptual cog slipping into..Or out of, place. It happens so cleanly and suddenly that I can almost point to it.
Suddenly I notice the wooden floor is made of wooden jigsaw pieces and this seems normal, I smile. The room now seems so different that I cannot tell you whose room it is or where it happens to be. it seems to exist on its own, it is all that exists. Zero enters the room from seemingly no where, I ask how he found the door. he began babbling in another language I couldnt understand,he then changes into a ragdoll, he has yellow wool hair and i can see every twisted strand clearly, I think to myself how preposterous,The more I try to see past the illusion the more perfect the illusion becomes until normal vision is absolutely impossible. I begin to worry slightly and look around my room at other objects to correct my vision, The back of the sofa is suddenly made of darkcolored oversize jigsaw pieces stacked on their sides against the wall, some of these have fallen forwards and piled up to make the seat of the sofa, completely unhazed, and again I cannot, however hard I try, see past the illusion. On this occasion I am wearing a black onsie with red markings that I got for christmas. it makes me feel furry and friendly and I suddenly realise that I am in fact a black wolf. I can't see myself, I just know. I laugh a kind of breathy wolf laugh because I realise that I am not actually allowed on the sofa.. they haven’t noticed this and allow me to remain. And also i think maybe because i became a wolf that i couldnt understand zero.
The table has become a stack of four oversize children’s alphabet blocks and suddenly I do not recognise any feature of the room although I feel at home here. Looking at the television I am struck with a sudden realisation that everything has been reversed... that we are inside the television and a normal world lies beyond through that opening of light. That makes a little more sense i tell myself. convinced I have some strand of logic to base this on, I confidently walk towards the screen. As i got closer a new sound echoed into the room, I turned my head trying to pinpoint the sounds, looking at the fire I see a lightshow in the distance and fancy that its a vast arena where a band is playing. I can hear the band and the crowd, I am enthralled and want to see more but I Am aware that I am too large to get in, and that also, I am a wolf. I bark. They look at me. I look at them. I look at the television. I scratch my ear. I look back at them. They look at television. But it feels so real that in that moment I could swear that my eyes have been opened to a greater and more true reality. By the time I reach the fireplace I seem to be about 40 feet in the air and rising all the time. I can see the room far below and air whistles around my head, I see light snow and it feels refreshing. Looking forwards I see the fireplace in front of me and I located my pipe which had changed color since the last i saw it. I walked back over to the sofa to think, I can see the fireplace opposite me and at the same level as myself. I laugh, and then feel self-conscious.
I sit and watch my friends there for a while and get bored... My eyes feel heavy and I lean on the side of the sofa, and pass out. and See a white bag wrapped around by an O shaped hand coming up to my face like a funnel. again it comes to my face, and again, and again, and again very fast like a trail except that I feel each funnel hitting the last, I feel their impact through my hand and lips until suddenly I fly backwards and into a bigger funnel behind me and the chain of funnels takes me down into another alternate reality. Im on top of a school roof, and im looking out from my elevated perspective, Im completely calm. i hear a familiar voice call my name, i look harder to see why i hear it, i hear it again but louder, and realize its closer than i thought, and turned my head, and saw two girls, one looked so familiar, i felt i could completely with all my soul trust this person, she looked concerned, and asked why I wasnt attentive, I explained, I come here to get lost in my mind. Ive done so for over a year now. so my mind subconsciously sees the familiar surroundings and knows what time it is. such as when you put your head to a pillow it knows rest is to happen soon after. she seemed to understand. She explained it was time to return home, that this place wasnt real. I recalled the television, and thought i could see it. I asked her if i should jump in. and she hesitated. But I felt my mind almost pulling me towards it. and i jumped.
Tunes ive heard while on computer repeat endlessly and sometimes mockingly and I feel I am trapped inside some town made entirely of thoughts. Everything is perfectly vivid. Things revolve around simple rules here although I am not always sure of what those rules are. something keeps flying past me picking up parts of the scenery as it goes and I am jumping over blocks to avoid it. Alexander, who is a television, hovered in front of me. somewhere a crowd of all the voices say 'hello alexander' in unison. I begin to hear the harp noise again. I race around corridors and passages, sometimes being chased, sometimes chasing Alexander, there seems to be something I am supposed to be doing but I don't know what it is.. all I know is that I have a purpose in all of this, I belong here, I have some vital role.
I felt a gap inside the space im in, and i see that girl again, i held her hand and it stretched into bliss into the back of my mind till it was blank. soon the harp song is all that exists, but now I hear it muffled like I am floating inside of something much bigger than myself. the air arounds me becomes colder, and more distant, i keep walking as the gravity around me shifts, as i walk sideways parallel to the ground, I hear a faint tune, i cannot recognize what instrument is it played by, but the shapes and tunes begin for form tree like structures, and leave their essence on the ground, i begin to feel my weight shift as im able to plant my steps through the what i convinced myself were leaves, I see that girl again, she feels so wonderful, and i want nothing more than to have her near. I ask of her hand, and she nods holding it out to me, which i clasp tightly, i offer if she'd like to walk with me she seems to feel as i do, we want nothing more than to share this world together, I chose to walk instead of stand, because it creates more energy, we're in a rhythm of symmetrical thoughts and movements, I thought aloud, I felt her smileing, which made me smile too.
I kept hearing keys typing, that seems to come from inside my own head, they got progressively louder, and the world around me shifted into an alphabetical world of numerical characters, all i could do was follow the typing, and suddenly I am back in my room and things are how they should be, the laptop in front of me.
Suddenly I notice the wooden floor is made of wooden jigsaw pieces and this seems normal, I smile. The room now seems so different that I cannot tell you whose room it is or where it happens to be. it seems to exist on its own, it is all that exists. Zero enters the room from seemingly no where, I ask how he found the door. he began babbling in another language I couldnt understand,he then changes into a ragdoll, he has yellow wool hair and i can see every twisted strand clearly, I think to myself how preposterous,The more I try to see past the illusion the more perfect the illusion becomes until normal vision is absolutely impossible. I begin to worry slightly and look around my room at other objects to correct my vision, The back of the sofa is suddenly made of darkcolored oversize jigsaw pieces stacked on their sides against the wall, some of these have fallen forwards and piled up to make the seat of the sofa, completely unhazed, and again I cannot, however hard I try, see past the illusion. On this occasion I am wearing a black onsie with red markings that I got for christmas. it makes me feel furry and friendly and I suddenly realise that I am in fact a black wolf. I can't see myself, I just know. I laugh a kind of breathy wolf laugh because I realise that I am not actually allowed on the sofa.. they haven’t noticed this and allow me to remain. And also i think maybe because i became a wolf that i couldnt understand zero.
The table has become a stack of four oversize children’s alphabet blocks and suddenly I do not recognise any feature of the room although I feel at home here. Looking at the television I am struck with a sudden realisation that everything has been reversed... that we are inside the television and a normal world lies beyond through that opening of light. That makes a little more sense i tell myself. convinced I have some strand of logic to base this on, I confidently walk towards the screen. As i got closer a new sound echoed into the room, I turned my head trying to pinpoint the sounds, looking at the fire I see a lightshow in the distance and fancy that its a vast arena where a band is playing. I can hear the band and the crowd, I am enthralled and want to see more but I Am aware that I am too large to get in, and that also, I am a wolf. I bark. They look at me. I look at them. I look at the television. I scratch my ear. I look back at them. They look at television. But it feels so real that in that moment I could swear that my eyes have been opened to a greater and more true reality. By the time I reach the fireplace I seem to be about 40 feet in the air and rising all the time. I can see the room far below and air whistles around my head, I see light snow and it feels refreshing. Looking forwards I see the fireplace in front of me and I located my pipe which had changed color since the last i saw it. I walked back over to the sofa to think, I can see the fireplace opposite me and at the same level as myself. I laugh, and then feel self-conscious.
I sit and watch my friends there for a while and get bored... My eyes feel heavy and I lean on the side of the sofa, and pass out. and See a white bag wrapped around by an O shaped hand coming up to my face like a funnel. again it comes to my face, and again, and again, and again very fast like a trail except that I feel each funnel hitting the last, I feel their impact through my hand and lips until suddenly I fly backwards and into a bigger funnel behind me and the chain of funnels takes me down into another alternate reality. Im on top of a school roof, and im looking out from my elevated perspective, Im completely calm. i hear a familiar voice call my name, i look harder to see why i hear it, i hear it again but louder, and realize its closer than i thought, and turned my head, and saw two girls, one looked so familiar, i felt i could completely with all my soul trust this person, she looked concerned, and asked why I wasnt attentive, I explained, I come here to get lost in my mind. Ive done so for over a year now. so my mind subconsciously sees the familiar surroundings and knows what time it is. such as when you put your head to a pillow it knows rest is to happen soon after. she seemed to understand. She explained it was time to return home, that this place wasnt real. I recalled the television, and thought i could see it. I asked her if i should jump in. and she hesitated. But I felt my mind almost pulling me towards it. and i jumped.
Tunes ive heard while on computer repeat endlessly and sometimes mockingly and I feel I am trapped inside some town made entirely of thoughts. Everything is perfectly vivid. Things revolve around simple rules here although I am not always sure of what those rules are. something keeps flying past me picking up parts of the scenery as it goes and I am jumping over blocks to avoid it. Alexander, who is a television, hovered in front of me. somewhere a crowd of all the voices say 'hello alexander' in unison. I begin to hear the harp noise again. I race around corridors and passages, sometimes being chased, sometimes chasing Alexander, there seems to be something I am supposed to be doing but I don't know what it is.. all I know is that I have a purpose in all of this, I belong here, I have some vital role.
I felt a gap inside the space im in, and i see that girl again, i held her hand and it stretched into bliss into the back of my mind till it was blank. soon the harp song is all that exists, but now I hear it muffled like I am floating inside of something much bigger than myself. the air arounds me becomes colder, and more distant, i keep walking as the gravity around me shifts, as i walk sideways parallel to the ground, I hear a faint tune, i cannot recognize what instrument is it played by, but the shapes and tunes begin for form tree like structures, and leave their essence on the ground, i begin to feel my weight shift as im able to plant my steps through the what i convinced myself were leaves, I see that girl again, she feels so wonderful, and i want nothing more than to have her near. I ask of her hand, and she nods holding it out to me, which i clasp tightly, i offer if she'd like to walk with me she seems to feel as i do, we want nothing more than to share this world together, I chose to walk instead of stand, because it creates more energy, we're in a rhythm of symmetrical thoughts and movements, I thought aloud, I felt her smileing, which made me smile too.
I kept hearing keys typing, that seems to come from inside my own head, they got progressively louder, and the world around me shifted into an alphabetical world of numerical characters, all i could do was follow the typing, and suddenly I am back in my room and things are how they should be, the laptop in front of me.
