Recently I've been thinking about my mum. Havnt seen her since January.

Found photos of my bedroom from a few years ago and it always sets me off crying as when I told mum about the abuse she basically swept it under the rug and when I left to go ack to uni I never went back to stay. I visited once making sure the abuser was out the house and gone and my mum accused me of stealing my own stuff from my bedroom and got angry I opened mail with my name on it.

I have questions mum.

Everyday I think why did you choose him over your own daughter after what he did to me.

Every time I phone you, you are always too busy to sit and chat with me...you don't even work.

I wish you would tell me why you won't leave him. I'm willing to sell everything to have you move down with me.

When you said you would have done something if I had told you what was happening when I was younger it broke me. You looked happy with him I didn't want to say something to break you guys up. You finally had a man who didn't beat you up or drink heavily. I was so young I didn't know it was wrong and after a while it was normal for me.

When you got married I refused to ever call him dad or take his last name.

You said oh you seemed happy around him.

That's the thing mum....you bury it...bury it as deep as you can.