lovewing wins the slot! :3

I need some examples for some future badge commissions so I'm offering one free badge!
Just leave a picture/ref of your character in the comments and i will choose which character to draw :3
There will be actually 2 badges...one chosen from the comments posted on this journal, on from a journal i will put on deviantart.
The deadline is in 2 days from now.

The badges will be draw traditionally, i will used pressed flowers and gold gouache that looks just like gold leaf! They will measure about 7.50X10cm (3X4 inches) and will be laminated and sent to the commissioner.


I also wanted to talk about something great that happened to me.
When i was in Spain i had faced one of the most ugly emotional breakdowns i ever had in my life. Call me materialistic, but one of my most gruesome nightmares has always been losing my taxidermy collection (skulls, feathers and bird study skins which almost all i have found myself, cleaned and prepared myself) but most of all losing my artwork in which i poured hours of work, passion and pain. I love gifting art, and most of the time when somebody buys something from me I throw in an extra feather or drawing, but thinking of those drawings just burning, being tossed like thrash,completely leaves me cold and with suicidal thoughts.
When we got there we shortly realized that despite somebody's promises we ended up in the shithole, with absolutely no money and no internet(so i can try to earn something online). We were really desperate. The first blow came when the people were we where living before, in Romania, (room ates, in a rented house) gave us a sudden out of the blue ultimatum that if we don't send them extra money, they will throw away all of our stuff. Luckily my mother went there and took most of the stuff...but i lost all of my skulls, my fox pelt and most of my big feathers.
The second heartache came when the person who invited us in Spain came over our place with some ''family friends''. At that point I really trusted that person. They told me to give them some drawings so that they can take them to a tattoo studio for a recommendation, and being desperate and naive like the little shit i am, i gave them most of my good drawings. I never saw those drawings or that guy ever again. That person told us AFTERWARDS like they couldn't warn me before that that guy is a cocaine addict so i'll prob never see the drawings again.
So if you look through my gallery and happen to see some of my drawings around Madrid, just let me know, so that i can live with the bittersweet thought that they did not end up in the thrash, at least.
That time i really thought i will kill myself...how could i have been so naive, so stupid to give an unknown person my best artworks?! But in the end i learned to accept what happened. My boyfriend taught me to let go of these material attachments. And now i don't even feel sorrowful anymore. I think that in the end all of my belongings that got lost will come back to me, one way or another.

But anyway the great thing that happened was that, i got really sad that one of my best Diana drawings ( https://www.furaffinity.net/view/18800922/ ) got lost in that shitstorm. It wasn't even finished...but now as i renovated my apartment i found it again among WIPS! But i looked for it soo much...i could have sworn, it was along the drawings i gave to that guy...i even knew the exact place were i put it.. I know that after everything it's not such a big deal that one of my drawings returned, but it is for me and just proved tha ti should never give up..and believe that everything i lost will come back to me.

I wanted to write this in hopes that those who went trough a similar experience, of loosing their drawings, find a bit of solace in this. I think most artists are very easy to be emotionally tricked and manipulated even if they are aware of these merciless rules of living among people. And the hardest part, after you lost so much is somebody, maybe even the one who tricked you, just blatantly say ''eh, you can make more drawings''.
But it is the truth....maybe what you lost will come back to you or maybe you will create something even more beautiful in it's memory..and this time make sure nobody takes it away from you any more! <3