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Loss of an inspiration, very beaten up right now.
8 years ago
✩*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡.★.｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩
Close Friends, awesome peeps!
✩*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡.★.｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩ 
Sorry to everyone who I've not been very good at getting back to with messages over the last to days, I'm doing extremely badly emotionally right now.
You've probably heard about the passing of Linkin Park lead singer Chester Bennington which was all over the media yesterday. Linkin Park was the first ever band I ever called mine, the first sound that ever really resonated with me, I lived and breathed the band in my early teens and they got me through the toughest few years of my life from 11 - 14, where I was struggling through the deaths of my father, and later my Granny and Grandpa. My main OC Michael who I drew more recently Here is still named for the bands second lead vocalist and co writer, he used to have Chester's name as a middle name for a short while, but I changed it over a dumb teenage fight with someone with a sona of the same name lol. I'm considering changing it back now since it's been so long and in light of this.
But anyway...
I wanted to write this here because I am really, not dealing well, I found out last night half way through my shift at work and had to carry on for the next 4 hours pretending I was ok, as soon as I got home I completely broke down and I cried myself to sleep eventually, I have never been so affected by the death of a celebrity, but his voice, and the lyrics of those songs helped me survive, and made me feel like I wasn't alone in the darkest years I've faced so far in my life, it feels almost like losing a friend or a family member. The band and it's members have influenced who I am as a person and that's not an exaggeration, my art and my want to pursue art, the way I think about things, my fashion sense, aesthetics and of course music were all influenced by them, they were a huge obsession, my biggest love for 3 years or more.
To think that he was still suffering so much after dealing with years of hardship, through abuse, addiction and everything life through at him, he seemed so strong, and he seemed like he was doing ok, to know he must have been suffering so badly all alone, cuts so deep.
I don't think I can write much more I'm getting really upset again, and I know this might not make much sense to a lot of people but I am absolutely heart broken. I might not be good at replying to messages for a little while as I'm just in a very strange emotional state right now, I'm going to carry on trying to finish owed work the best I can. But I think I put it into words better than this with the short post I made on my facebook last night, so imma post that here too.
If I had to choose I think "Easier To Run" would be my favourite song by Linkin Park, I've loved so many but as an album Meteora was something else and I've never heard a sound like it before or since. The lyrics have that slight extra sting now. Rest in peace to the man, and the voice that carried me through some really really hard years of my life. sometimes when you're going through a lot of hurt, hearing music that speaks about struggle and is as raw and emotional as this, is just what's needed, something to relate to, to feel like someone understands. Thank you so much Chester, want to hope you knew at least a little how your voice, and your music meant to a generation, and still means so much to me.
You've probably heard about the passing of Linkin Park lead singer Chester Bennington which was all over the media yesterday. Linkin Park was the first ever band I ever called mine, the first sound that ever really resonated with me, I lived and breathed the band in my early teens and they got me through the toughest few years of my life from 11 - 14, where I was struggling through the deaths of my father, and later my Granny and Grandpa. My main OC Michael who I drew more recently Here is still named for the bands second lead vocalist and co writer, he used to have Chester's name as a middle name for a short while, but I changed it over a dumb teenage fight with someone with a sona of the same name lol. I'm considering changing it back now since it's been so long and in light of this.
But anyway...
I wanted to write this here because I am really, not dealing well, I found out last night half way through my shift at work and had to carry on for the next 4 hours pretending I was ok, as soon as I got home I completely broke down and I cried myself to sleep eventually, I have never been so affected by the death of a celebrity, but his voice, and the lyrics of those songs helped me survive, and made me feel like I wasn't alone in the darkest years I've faced so far in my life, it feels almost like losing a friend or a family member. The band and it's members have influenced who I am as a person and that's not an exaggeration, my art and my want to pursue art, the way I think about things, my fashion sense, aesthetics and of course music were all influenced by them, they were a huge obsession, my biggest love for 3 years or more.
To think that he was still suffering so much after dealing with years of hardship, through abuse, addiction and everything life through at him, he seemed so strong, and he seemed like he was doing ok, to know he must have been suffering so badly all alone, cuts so deep.
I don't think I can write much more I'm getting really upset again, and I know this might not make much sense to a lot of people but I am absolutely heart broken. I might not be good at replying to messages for a little while as I'm just in a very strange emotional state right now, I'm going to carry on trying to finish owed work the best I can. But I think I put it into words better than this with the short post I made on my facebook last night, so imma post that here too.
If I had to choose I think "Easier To Run" would be my favourite song by Linkin Park, I've loved so many but as an album Meteora was something else and I've never heard a sound like it before or since. The lyrics have that slight extra sting now. Rest in peace to the man, and the voice that carried me through some really really hard years of my life. sometimes when you're going through a lot of hurt, hearing music that speaks about struggle and is as raw and emotional as this, is just what's needed, something to relate to, to feel like someone understands. Thank you so much Chester, want to hope you knew at least a little how your voice, and your music meant to a generation, and still means so much to me.
✩*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡.★.｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩
Art I'm waiting on:
Illustration (no BG) - 
YCH - 
this isn't to pressure anyone I'm commissioning btw! it's here so I don't forget hah!
✩*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡.★.｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*✩
He left behind a legacy of creativity and musical innovation that many will cherish, one that I hope will continue to inspire, encourage, and strengthen you and so many others.
Thank you man, I really appreciate your comment here so much, and for the understanding <3
Take the time you need to grieve ^w^