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*sssniiiifffff* :/
8 years ago
General
dah... third depressional loneliness dip in a month span, so strong as to over power my anti-depressants...
On one side I could exerting societal pressure on myself... on other is just longing to fit in somewhere, at least for awhile
the problem is that my philosophy I seek to achieve is to have a heart as pure gold as possible, but its always been eclipsed by the shadow of having always lived a shut-in and sheltered lifestyle... complied with fact that I try to be a concrete and sensible thinker, as to not do anything rash... which has broken me to always seeking approval of my actions.. which only furthers this cycle...
I don't know if I'll ever be able to be serious/fully committed about a relationship, but have the desire to have as many relationships as possible, while respecting those of others who already have someone
I seek to spread joy and happiness, so that in turn I can be too, but its always been overshadowed by the limitations and concepts of real life
My head might be too into the idea of fantasy utopia..., but what place to better have to get along or not so much, and yet at the end of the day sitll end up embracing each other?
The sad part this answer is only exist now and then in small bursts, each convention, where a huge group of us gather..., but it onyl lasts fora few days.... oh how we all wish it could last forever...
In fantasy we can have all the time in the world to do anything anytime..., yet in reality I just sit here in front of computer screen pawwing likea canine tryingto grab someone's attention
No matter what though, I always cling onto that glimmer of hope, that I may eventually manage to climb out his hole with someone for at least a while...
How I long to be able to just ravel freely to go from meeting one of you to the next and circling back as I complete the loop
Yes I desire a state of Ourbous, to let time be meaningless as well as age, to love all and be loved by all
At least I'm finally going to Furpocalypse this year, and still looking for those who still have room openings
Its just the "Bittersweet Symphony" that's life... for better or worse
On one side I could exerting societal pressure on myself... on other is just longing to fit in somewhere, at least for awhile
the problem is that my philosophy I seek to achieve is to have a heart as pure gold as possible, but its always been eclipsed by the shadow of having always lived a shut-in and sheltered lifestyle... complied with fact that I try to be a concrete and sensible thinker, as to not do anything rash... which has broken me to always seeking approval of my actions.. which only furthers this cycle...
I don't know if I'll ever be able to be serious/fully committed about a relationship, but have the desire to have as many relationships as possible, while respecting those of others who already have someone
I seek to spread joy and happiness, so that in turn I can be too, but its always been overshadowed by the limitations and concepts of real life
My head might be too into the idea of fantasy utopia..., but what place to better have to get along or not so much, and yet at the end of the day sitll end up embracing each other?
The sad part this answer is only exist now and then in small bursts, each convention, where a huge group of us gather..., but it onyl lasts fora few days.... oh how we all wish it could last forever...
In fantasy we can have all the time in the world to do anything anytime..., yet in reality I just sit here in front of computer screen pawwing likea canine tryingto grab someone's attention
No matter what though, I always cling onto that glimmer of hope, that I may eventually manage to climb out his hole with someone for at least a while...
How I long to be able to just ravel freely to go from meeting one of you to the next and circling back as I complete the loop
Yes I desire a state of Ourbous, to let time be meaningless as well as age, to love all and be loved by all
At least I'm finally going to Furpocalypse this year, and still looking for those who still have room openings
Its just the "Bittersweet Symphony" that's life... for better or worse
It often means you end up with more people to know, and makes you a more relatable person!
Be strong!
Back to at least one of your main points, there are sometimes I wish we could all get together without the usual threats life brings along or controversy getting in the way of anything. Personally, I don't feel it at most of the fur meets, save when I feel social enough and meet the right people, but I do feel it when reading fiction. Characters that are well-developed and feel like someone you can actually talk to. Maybe that is what you need, too. I am on Skype, just to let you know. I don't publicly post my username on here because I mainly use Skype for close friends, but we have met at the diner meets. Feel free to shoot me a PM if you're interested!