Like so many other things, I'm pleased to find that I overestimated the difficulty, and now, the going is easy. I feel a little silly for getting so worked up.

I have had a long time to think about my status, and I am sorry if I have upset anyone. 24 is not that old. Besides, now if I apply for financial aid, the authorities can no longer legally consider my parents' income. Therefore, I may, perhaps, be able to go back to school. I would like to pay off this credit card first.

I feel a little better about some things. I feel guilt and regret about others. I find that I have a demanding mindset about too many things, and it is my hope that I will be more reasonable with myself, and thus cease to deter myself from doing things--not things that I 'ought' to do, neither things that I 'should' do, nor things that I 'must' do, but things that I 'want' to do, and to translate tasks that will assist me into tasks that I want to do naturally.

Although, there are some matters of discipline that I only feel 'stress' over doing after thinking about them: push-ups every morning on the stairs, going to bed at a respectable hour, limiting caloric intake, continuing regular maintenance... all of these things become more obstinate when I try to reinforce them as things I 'need' to do as opposed to things I want to do.

These human minds are incredible at defeating themselves. I believe I am getting the hang of things and--dare I say it? YES!--I am actually starting to believe that I am going sane for the first time in... any of my existences.