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Confession time & What's going on with my life
7 years ago
General
To be really honest with you guys, in the past couple years I have been through a lot.
First, I got a fight with my best friend few years ago, a really worse one and we break up in the end.
I'm struggled for a whole year, it's not easy when you thinking about something you trying not to, we're too close to be apart but now it's all over, everyday the nightmare repeats in my head.
Even though I mad at him but actually part of me knew that it's not completely his fault, but I can't control my anger and sorrow anymore,
The depression continue to haunt me for a whole year and somehow I can finally moving on, but the wound were still there and we've never talk since then.
Second, Due to this struggle it affects all of my morale, for the past couple of years I'm kind of became mentally unstable, Sometimes I can't control my happiness meter, I feel less happy on the same happiness I used to experienced but I'm being more vulnerable to the sadness instead.
This makes my productivity and performance on working dropped heavily
Third, Due to my stress with family business issue, I've finally discussed with my family and come to the conclusion that I'm quitting from the company and working on my own for living.
This makes drawing became my actual job, not just a hobby anymore.
Fourth, In the past few years I'm still struggle with the sadness from breaking up with my best friend and I have to draw as a job, this makes me feel even less loving to draw something, and by the time I've finished my first Anthology book project, I just lost all of the interest on drawing, a really big one this time.
This explains my absent from this fandom and why I'm not open for commission yet even though I've said I'm going to do it for so long.
I just want to put it on hold until I can handle the commission like a professional, I hate doing my job with half-ass effort and I don't wanna do that to my customer at all.
Lastly, thank you everyone for "bearing" with me until now(Sorry for the pun though lol)
All of your support were the thing that makes me what I am today, I'm really appreciate it.
Until next time then, see you guys later!
First, I got a fight with my best friend few years ago, a really worse one and we break up in the end.
I'm struggled for a whole year, it's not easy when you thinking about something you trying not to, we're too close to be apart but now it's all over, everyday the nightmare repeats in my head.
Even though I mad at him but actually part of me knew that it's not completely his fault, but I can't control my anger and sorrow anymore,
The depression continue to haunt me for a whole year and somehow I can finally moving on, but the wound were still there and we've never talk since then.
Second, Due to this struggle it affects all of my morale, for the past couple of years I'm kind of became mentally unstable, Sometimes I can't control my happiness meter, I feel less happy on the same happiness I used to experienced but I'm being more vulnerable to the sadness instead.
This makes my productivity and performance on working dropped heavily
Third, Due to my stress with family business issue, I've finally discussed with my family and come to the conclusion that I'm quitting from the company and working on my own for living.
This makes drawing became my actual job, not just a hobby anymore.
Fourth, In the past few years I'm still struggle with the sadness from breaking up with my best friend and I have to draw as a job, this makes me feel even less loving to draw something, and by the time I've finished my first Anthology book project, I just lost all of the interest on drawing, a really big one this time.
This explains my absent from this fandom and why I'm not open for commission yet even though I've said I'm going to do it for so long.
I just want to put it on hold until I can handle the commission like a professional, I hate doing my job with half-ass effort and I don't wanna do that to my customer at all.
Lastly, thank you everyone for "bearing" with me until now(Sorry for the pun though lol)
All of your support were the thing that makes me what I am today, I'm really appreciate it.
Until next time then, see you guys later!
haha I'm dead inside thats why I can't still do commission even under such depression.
but I'm glad you're having a break after the whole thing happening through ya.
tho I hope your family will understand how you wanted to do as a living.
So they let me be on my way, even become a supportive parents which I'm really happy about it.
But well, sometimes they still think the digital artist were something related to graphic designer, which I have to explain several times until they stop giving me a suggestion based on their opinion lol.
And yeah, Despite I've lost my best friend I still have a lot of good friend, their support really help me recover from those exhaustion, they makes me realize that I should focus on present not the past, I owe them all a big time.
Like, I've noticed your feedback from all over the place, even with my long absent you still show your positive feedback which really makes me happy that I'm still making art.
Keep your chin up. 頑張って！