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7 years ago
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"It was like two colors existed - deep black and the red of the fire" I can't remember, I don't understand, is it malice that makes you this way?
Carry it with you 'til someone forgives you, I laugh 'cuz there's nothing to say. https://youtu.be/FOuzVOajtaM
Before you click, sit back and watch, a message before viewing.
1) Yes, my voice actually cracked in the song...recently I've been going through another struggle...yet again. For the past few days I was thinking of new content to record, one message became relatively repetitive in my mind...
"I'm tired of being a lone wolf...I'm tired of being a lone wolf...I'm tired of being a lone wolf"
Lone wolf? Basically single. I'm fucking sick and tired of it! I'm sure a lot of you know the exact same way I feel, but this is bad. How bad? When I found out a friend of mine has started to explore another possible relationship with someone, it made me both jealous and angry. Two emotions I should NEVER feel towards my own friends. But how can I help that? How can one fix that? Honestly I've never been in that situation before.
Today I recorded this video and had to constantly adjust things before I had the right video finally recorded. Honestly I can't say enough about this video. I know none of my content online ever gets much recognition, but I figured if there are fish in the sea, I mind as well cast a reel with a load of bait and fucking heave the shit out there and hope. Which leads to my next point and my last point.
2) Yes, I am single...but I want a relationship, and I'm actively searching. HELP WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED!
I'm now strong enough to start looking something more after my past relationship with Sparky. Now I see what THAT was as a laughable, pathetic attempt to have something. After that, I realized that I needed to really change my outlook as well. I hate to be honest, and I even hate to word this, especially this way...but there are a LOT of things that have changed since the breakup. I'm no longer looking men...I'm no longer actively RPing...I just consider it growing up...looking more towards finding that one perfect mate. Maybe I do have to test drive the car before buying it...as they say...but really...I just wish I could find that one perfect woman in my life. Like, I really have to just mention that.
Anyone that could help me maybe look for someone...I encourage you to help me out here. I'm of course mainly looking someone local here to NC as I'm opposed to long distance relationships. Having done that way too many times to count when I was exploring my bisexual nature, I was finding myself not fit for this type of relationship as I couldn't really build a solid foundation of trust with some individuals...and more importantly finding out that others wanted me to give a whole hell of a lot more back to them, striving to be with them, than being on a balanced playing field where both of us could meet in the middle when it came to how much one was giving back to being in a relationship together.
Please please PLEASE! If anyone would be willing to help lend a paw towards helping me get into a solid stable relationship...I really would greatly appreciate it.
I will be doing my part to get out and start looking more. Honestly, I have been driving out back and forth on the new set of wheels I have...but I really haven't been going much anywhere. Still trying to be easy with the Red Rocket that I've nicknamed, but still...that need is to get out and meet new people is there.
And you know...I'm going to say this or bust hell wide open...
I went to Howlers Eve here in Raleigh back in October. I thought I would go to maybe find someone. In fact, I wanted to go just to open my boundaries up and open myself up to the crowd in hopes of maybe finding someone...I can't say I did and I can't say I didn't find someone. I know people really feel certain things towards others and some of those things they readily don't want to mention right away, but I feel like if someone had feelings for me and just felt too shy about sharing them with me while I was there, I really don't see what there was to be so shy about. I mean, sure, it's placing yourself out there before someone you've never seen much before or heard much before, so there's a lot of questionable acceptance that one doesn't feel makes it a certain thing. So I was rather disappointed when I left that I didn't find anyone there. That was my first fur con and...I left disappointed. Not a shock to me but at the same time, not a bad thing considering that it was my first and that I don't feel like it was going to be my absolute best. That's just me.
Anyways, any help...any one person that would love to chat with me, I can be found on Telegram at "ShadowWolf6". I'm on here a LOT...I mean A LOT. My phone doesn't stop blowing up from groups and channels that I'm in where I receive new messages and new pics and shit like that. Please...don't be shy to message me. Place yourself out there. I'd love to chat with you and...who the hell knows! We might have something! In fact, if you're reading this and you went to Howlers Eve and maybe have something you needed to say but just felt embarrassed to say it, now's the time!
Most importantly, enjoy the video...a Nine Inch Nails cover to "Something I Can Never Have". Give the cover some love...even if I don't.
-Shadow Wolf
Before you click, sit back and watch, a message before viewing.
1) Yes, my voice actually cracked in the song...recently I've been going through another struggle...yet again. For the past few days I was thinking of new content to record, one message became relatively repetitive in my mind...
"I'm tired of being a lone wolf...I'm tired of being a lone wolf...I'm tired of being a lone wolf"
Lone wolf? Basically single. I'm fucking sick and tired of it! I'm sure a lot of you know the exact same way I feel, but this is bad. How bad? When I found out a friend of mine has started to explore another possible relationship with someone, it made me both jealous and angry. Two emotions I should NEVER feel towards my own friends. But how can I help that? How can one fix that? Honestly I've never been in that situation before.
Today I recorded this video and had to constantly adjust things before I had the right video finally recorded. Honestly I can't say enough about this video. I know none of my content online ever gets much recognition, but I figured if there are fish in the sea, I mind as well cast a reel with a load of bait and fucking heave the shit out there and hope. Which leads to my next point and my last point.
2) Yes, I am single...but I want a relationship, and I'm actively searching. HELP WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED!
I'm now strong enough to start looking something more after my past relationship with Sparky. Now I see what THAT was as a laughable, pathetic attempt to have something. After that, I realized that I needed to really change my outlook as well. I hate to be honest, and I even hate to word this, especially this way...but there are a LOT of things that have changed since the breakup. I'm no longer looking men...I'm no longer actively RPing...I just consider it growing up...looking more towards finding that one perfect mate. Maybe I do have to test drive the car before buying it...as they say...but really...I just wish I could find that one perfect woman in my life. Like, I really have to just mention that.
Anyone that could help me maybe look for someone...I encourage you to help me out here. I'm of course mainly looking someone local here to NC as I'm opposed to long distance relationships. Having done that way too many times to count when I was exploring my bisexual nature, I was finding myself not fit for this type of relationship as I couldn't really build a solid foundation of trust with some individuals...and more importantly finding out that others wanted me to give a whole hell of a lot more back to them, striving to be with them, than being on a balanced playing field where both of us could meet in the middle when it came to how much one was giving back to being in a relationship together.
Please please PLEASE! If anyone would be willing to help lend a paw towards helping me get into a solid stable relationship...I really would greatly appreciate it.
I will be doing my part to get out and start looking more. Honestly, I have been driving out back and forth on the new set of wheels I have...but I really haven't been going much anywhere. Still trying to be easy with the Red Rocket that I've nicknamed, but still...that need is to get out and meet new people is there.
And you know...I'm going to say this or bust hell wide open...
I went to Howlers Eve here in Raleigh back in October. I thought I would go to maybe find someone. In fact, I wanted to go just to open my boundaries up and open myself up to the crowd in hopes of maybe finding someone...I can't say I did and I can't say I didn't find someone. I know people really feel certain things towards others and some of those things they readily don't want to mention right away, but I feel like if someone had feelings for me and just felt too shy about sharing them with me while I was there, I really don't see what there was to be so shy about. I mean, sure, it's placing yourself out there before someone you've never seen much before or heard much before, so there's a lot of questionable acceptance that one doesn't feel makes it a certain thing. So I was rather disappointed when I left that I didn't find anyone there. That was my first fur con and...I left disappointed. Not a shock to me but at the same time, not a bad thing considering that it was my first and that I don't feel like it was going to be my absolute best. That's just me.
Anyways, any help...any one person that would love to chat with me, I can be found on Telegram at "ShadowWolf6". I'm on here a LOT...I mean A LOT. My phone doesn't stop blowing up from groups and channels that I'm in where I receive new messages and new pics and shit like that. Please...don't be shy to message me. Place yourself out there. I'd love to chat with you and...who the hell knows! We might have something! In fact, if you're reading this and you went to Howlers Eve and maybe have something you needed to say but just felt embarrassed to say it, now's the time!
Most importantly, enjoy the video...a Nine Inch Nails cover to "Something I Can Never Have". Give the cover some love...even if I don't.
-Shadow Wolf
