ajkfadgkjd i can't even get through a couple comments before i burst into tears dfskjgjkd I'M CRYING RIGHT NOW I JUST. you are all so. so so. so amazing. I might be slow to replying to all your comments cause I'm writing through gross sobs but dsjggddsd I haven't cried this long in a while and all of the tears are happy.... it feels so good to feel something so genuine as this, without any fog or filter, I can't fathom the response you've all given me, I've hid from you all for so long and to finally crawl out of the hole and see the light, I'm just. blessed. I don't even know what to say! I'm just crying. I just want to make everyone i meet so happy and pay forward all the good that has been done to me because I TRULY believed for YEARS that I was just. not worth this world. I'm so happy I held on. I want to be a better person now that i've had this second chance at life and I'm no longer running from my destiny! I've suffered the worst abuses of this fandom and some pretty heinous abuse in real life but I still haven't let it stop me! I really wanted to. I really really really wanted to give up and act out in revenge and vengeance but I realized that would make me just as evil as the devil depression that pulled me under. I'm not seeking to rule hell. I'm not seeking to rule anything, I just want to be happy and share it with people and help others do the same. This is my dream! without the weight of my demons, even if one person believes in me, there is nothing i cannot do!!!

Now that that's established, I'm gonna keep reading and replying to your comments and wiping tears and blowing snot and just generally being the juiciest-faced creature on this planet atm cuz damn. u guys.

(i'll read these comments too but there's SO MANY i still have to read so I won't be able to reply to everyone this journal, just know i will read them like i read every nice comment i get!!!!!!! <333333 asjkafhagja woke up from a fever dream into eden somehow?????? that's how it feels sajkgdgdfsafffffffffff)