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The "Herm" tag has been re added - thank you!
7 years ago
While many of us will now have to manually adjust our category back from "Intersex", I am happy that the option has been returned to us.
However, let me make something perfectly clear, as was evidenced in my previous journal.
The complaints from the trans/intersex community about the herm tag were valid
In addition,
It is not okay to deride these people as snowflakes.
The "Herm is a slur" complaint stems from the historically correct understanding that out there in the real flesh-and-blood world, hermaphrodite had been used as a slur. The source of concern about the term was valid, even if the proposed erasure of actual hermaphrodites or people who self-identify as hermaphrodites was the trans/intersex community doing to us what cis-het bigots had tried to do to them. To end the cycle of abuse, one must recognize the validity of a claim separate from the invalidity of the solution.
It is absolutely not okay to casually deride and ignore trans and intersex people as "butthurt" or "snowflakes", or to dehumanize an already marginalized, vulnerable community just because some in the community are ignorant of the strength and beauty of the herm furry community. The only people that benefit from herms and intersex people fighting are the political groups and TERFs that want to erase all of us entirely. Thankfully, we are not bound by the definitions or methodologies used by fascists, and just as society is learning to accept the full genderfluid spectrum, so too can that spectrum be broadened to include those of us that have claimed a term and use it as a positive force.
After reading stories here, on Twitter, and in private messages, here's what I can piece together, simplified.
Herm was a slur, long ago.
In the early 90s, hyper, macro, and transformation communities began to figure out what terms best fit them. These were blended communities where you could be open, ask questions, explore your own sexuality. People didn't police terms, there was no thoughtcrime other than going "But that isn't realistic!". FurryMUCK, Tapestries, Macrophile, imageboards, YIM/AIM, IRC and even Skype, there were vibrant communities that created, shared and thrived. There were herms, male-herms, futa, shemales, dickgirls, the full gamut, and people explored each other. Honed their writing, practised their artwork, even made some early animations. Chakats, a species of almost exclusively herms, were pretty popular, though had a weirdly strict self-policing community that could get pretty nasty with themselves.
The herm communities got way bigger when FA launched, and people commissioned a plethora of herm and hyperherm and macro herm characters, some people even believing that you had to buy art of your hyperherm character from big popular artists. Other fetish groups found their way to, or split off from, the hyper community, sometimes keeping herm, other times switching to intersex, as each individual saw fit. It was a personal choice, that under no circumstances trod upon anyone else's toes. Terms like "Intersex" and "Trans" were virtually unheard of, because this was an environment where the blatant sexuality was entirely the point, leaving detractors and their baggage at the door. If you kicked up a fuss about terminology, people didn't spend time with you.
But something changed. I personally think it was around 2015, when there was this wave of TERF aggression and trans communities began to fight back. Us in the herm community seem to have become a casualty, shamed for existing, thought policed and branded as aggressors for using a word we had used for decades. Told that we were wrong and bad, the very same things that the abusers have done to the trans and intersex communities. Typically, the most vehement aggressors are younger furs that are ignorant that the herm community is really pretty big and we just believed we fit in with the intersex, the trans, the nonbinary.
"Those who are ignorant of history are doomed to repeat it." Education is important here, not slander and not derision or dismissal. Recognize that there is an information gap here, coupled with emotion, abuse, and a whole lot of sexuality. Even if a specific trans or intersex individual declares they will 'never' agree that herm isn't a slur anymore, or if they insist that your use of a term you self-identify with is somehow hurting them, you are not bound to abide by these assertions. A similar argument can be made for several fetishes that are getting a lot of hate and flak these days, typically from the same group of very loud, very ignorant, often young people who insist their viewpoint is the only one to consider. To dare defend a fetish, to dare defend a sex or gender term they don't like, is to be branded, ostracized, and excluded - the very same end results that earn bigots their title as bigots.
Thankfully, we need not be friends in order to be allies. Herms will support trans and intersex, even if they won't have us. Even if they won't let us. It's not their choice to make.
However, let me make something perfectly clear, as was evidenced in my previous journal.
The complaints from the trans/intersex community about the herm tag were valid
In addition,
It is not okay to deride these people as snowflakes.
The "Herm is a slur" complaint stems from the historically correct understanding that out there in the real flesh-and-blood world, hermaphrodite had been used as a slur. The source of concern about the term was valid, even if the proposed erasure of actual hermaphrodites or people who self-identify as hermaphrodites was the trans/intersex community doing to us what cis-het bigots had tried to do to them. To end the cycle of abuse, one must recognize the validity of a claim separate from the invalidity of the solution.
It is absolutely not okay to casually deride and ignore trans and intersex people as "butthurt" or "snowflakes", or to dehumanize an already marginalized, vulnerable community just because some in the community are ignorant of the strength and beauty of the herm furry community. The only people that benefit from herms and intersex people fighting are the political groups and TERFs that want to erase all of us entirely. Thankfully, we are not bound by the definitions or methodologies used by fascists, and just as society is learning to accept the full genderfluid spectrum, so too can that spectrum be broadened to include those of us that have claimed a term and use it as a positive force.
After reading stories here, on Twitter, and in private messages, here's what I can piece together, simplified.
Herm was a slur, long ago.
In the early 90s, hyper, macro, and transformation communities began to figure out what terms best fit them. These were blended communities where you could be open, ask questions, explore your own sexuality. People didn't police terms, there was no thoughtcrime other than going "But that isn't realistic!". FurryMUCK, Tapestries, Macrophile, imageboards, YIM/AIM, IRC and even Skype, there were vibrant communities that created, shared and thrived. There were herms, male-herms, futa, shemales, dickgirls, the full gamut, and people explored each other. Honed their writing, practised their artwork, even made some early animations. Chakats, a species of almost exclusively herms, were pretty popular, though had a weirdly strict self-policing community that could get pretty nasty with themselves.
The herm communities got way bigger when FA launched, and people commissioned a plethora of herm and hyperherm and macro herm characters, some people even believing that you had to buy art of your hyperherm character from big popular artists. Other fetish groups found their way to, or split off from, the hyper community, sometimes keeping herm, other times switching to intersex, as each individual saw fit. It was a personal choice, that under no circumstances trod upon anyone else's toes. Terms like "Intersex" and "Trans" were virtually unheard of, because this was an environment where the blatant sexuality was entirely the point, leaving detractors and their baggage at the door. If you kicked up a fuss about terminology, people didn't spend time with you.
But something changed. I personally think it was around 2015, when there was this wave of TERF aggression and trans communities began to fight back. Us in the herm community seem to have become a casualty, shamed for existing, thought policed and branded as aggressors for using a word we had used for decades. Told that we were wrong and bad, the very same things that the abusers have done to the trans and intersex communities. Typically, the most vehement aggressors are younger furs that are ignorant that the herm community is really pretty big and we just believed we fit in with the intersex, the trans, the nonbinary.
"Those who are ignorant of history are doomed to repeat it." Education is important here, not slander and not derision or dismissal. Recognize that there is an information gap here, coupled with emotion, abuse, and a whole lot of sexuality. Even if a specific trans or intersex individual declares they will 'never' agree that herm isn't a slur anymore, or if they insist that your use of a term you self-identify with is somehow hurting them, you are not bound to abide by these assertions. A similar argument can be made for several fetishes that are getting a lot of hate and flak these days, typically from the same group of very loud, very ignorant, often young people who insist their viewpoint is the only one to consider. To dare defend a fetish, to dare defend a sex or gender term they don't like, is to be branded, ostracized, and excluded - the very same end results that earn bigots their title as bigots.
Thankfully, we need not be friends in order to be allies. Herms will support trans and intersex, even if they won't have us. Even if they won't let us. It's not their choice to make.
As for irl intersex, that struggle is very real. Year after year of ignorance and "benign neglect" has been the story of my life. I absolutely consider "herm" a slur now when used in that context.
There were people like me. There were people who liked the things I liked. There were entire groups of people who created more of those things. It was a way for me to escape the very small, very closed-minded world of reality and explore infinite experience.
To someone with a very poor self-image, the idea that you could not only do anything but be anything was new and exciting. You could not only be a dog or a cat or a dragon, you didn't have to settle for male or female. You didn't need to conform to a simple definition of man or woman, nor did you have to be one or the other. If you liked something, you could do it, and chances are, there were other people out there who not only liked doing that thing, they liked the way you did that thing. You could express who and what you wanted to be with unprecedented freedom without limits imposed by biology or society or religious beliefs.
There has never been a group of people so supportive and so welcoming as the people I have met in the furry fandom who play herm characters. There has never been a time where I considered it insulting, a slur, or demeaning to a real group of people, because these are real people.
I wrote a polite but decisive troubleticket about it, just a two liner to show that removing the choice wasn't a option.
A few people unwatched me becasue of my statement to that end in my journal I posted.
I don't agree with 'them' trying to conflate the mythical/fantasy concept of a herm with anything that is part of the human condition IRL.
I support transgender people and their choices of expression, and even the protection of them if theire threatend goes without saying.
But what ever mindgame the radical elements of those 'progressives' (using the term loosely) used can't prevail.
And now - *sigh* - Fixing submissions - like all of them :-/
Edit: Gendertag seems to have been restored automaticaly for the most part.
...There are now 5 genders: Male, Female, Hermaphrodite, Intersex and Transgender.
But I noticed it's almost always very young furs or newer insecure furs. I mean there's no real reason to march up to me over it, I don't insist others use the language (How could I enforce that?) and I mean no offense in it's usage, as I won't use it for others until I know they like it.
As for the tags, this might be a fire starter; but I think we need to get out of calling it a gender tag. Call it something akin to biological sex tag, just more role off the tongue, even if we have to make a new word yet again. Why? Gender and Sex really need better clarification within the community, I can see one, or test for it, the other I can only find out through (preferably polite) questioning. So a 'sex' tag, is relevant to art, gender not so much unless it's story/animation.
And then someone can get angry because they designed a alien species that uses four or more biological parents ahaha
This is what I'm trying to say, it's madness to try and incorporate 50 billion genders to describe a image, when we can't actually see them in the image. We can only see sex, and we can't even see that it's functional without sequential images.
At best transgender can describe a physique or character, but there's continuous exception and it's better left to tags than a drop down list. I'd say whack it under "fetishes" but that's going to be even more hurtful. (We know why you come to FA though O:)
A friend linked Us to this today after We read an incredibly triggering discourse on r/salmacian courtesy of the r/intersex community.
We are a herm (f) - this isn't roleplay, it isn't a persona, and it isn't a euphemism or nickname for anything. Our gender identity is identical in almost every way to that of a Chakat. The gender experience and presentation both shift - genderfluidity pog - but the identity remains the same... online, in person, it doesn't matter. The label is the same, the pronouns are the same, and anything else is dysphoric to some extent or another.
Herm was the first nonbinary concept (and, with how We were cultured, gender) We ever learned. In Our circles, nobody used it rudely, nobody used it in bad faith, nobody used it coercively, nobody policed it, nobody stigmatized it. It was not a slur. It has never been a slur in Our circles.
Now, suddenly, We're running into automod and discourse and traumatizing situations and triggering language... and I'm sorry to be callous about it, but as valid and big a deal as triggers and trauma are: observing a label's good-faith use may be triggering, but coercive de-labeling and identity-shaming are traumatizing.
I am honored that your friend linked this journal and hoped it provided some historical education.
This... drove that home, I think... which is really important for Us right now because all the discourse is ... turns out it's actively traumatizing Us. ;w; Same as transphobes calling gender diversity "inappropriate", "unsafe", or "predatory" or telling their gender diverse young not to be themselves because "it'll confuse/upset/whatever someone" or something. Those things traumatize people... and without a strong community (We aren't well-connected these days) that effect is amplified.