where... actually is my self control? :/
7 years ago
General
I dunno why, but I've really lost it of late.
I go out for a walk on work time, and it's literally an hour before I get back to the office. I just like walking...
I go for a drink at 9 at night thinking surely I will come home at a sensible time, and 3.5 hours later stump up to my front door. I just like drinking...
The former might be healthy, the latter is less so. I need to fix this nonsense before all I do is walk and drink.
Admittedly I have some minor shite going on in my life, but it's minor, and this is not an excuse.
I go out for a walk on work time, and it's literally an hour before I get back to the office. I just like walking...
I go for a drink at 9 at night thinking surely I will come home at a sensible time, and 3.5 hours later stump up to my front door. I just like drinking...
The former might be healthy, the latter is less so. I need to fix this nonsense before all I do is walk and drink.
Admittedly I have some minor shite going on in my life, but it's minor, and this is not an excuse.
FA+

Going down to the pub for a drink isn't bad. Going down to the pub and coming back three and a half hours later drunk as a skunk... is. Especially if you find yourself unable to stop yourself.
What you are describing is a clear warning sign. Having been there, done that... get help now, before you hit rock bottom.
As a test. Head down to the pub, with a clear time limit. Say... if you head to the pub at 9 PM, tell yourself "Be back home by 10, no matter what." If you can't do that... you need to at least temporarily cut yourself cold turkey and seek assistance.