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Explanation
6 years ago
So. As some of you may already know, I'm 
greatwhitejill under a new account.
Some of you may have many questions but I will try and explain the situation that happened as best as I can.
To be frank, I fell into a dark place. I left for a really long time to try and cope with what was going on. For the longest time it really wasn't working out. I became reclusive, started to cut connections from friends and those close to me, and became more a lone as time passed. Things just got way too much for me to handle.
To keep a long story short. This was caused by several things, the high pressure that was put on me in my final college years and the interactions with a few bad eggs I had with the community. I will not be naming names. Period.
These interactions ranged from violations of my denial for requests of advancements in various ways, unsolicited nudes, and in one specific instance, the mental torture of blaming me for their own personal bad happenings irl when I refuse to be with them. The were from the people I thought were my friends at the time. I was clearly wrong. From this, my anxiety shot through the roof. I didn't know who to trust and kept all of my problems bottled up. This was a mistake. It affected me so badly in so many ways I even at one point started to give up on many things, including the one thing I loved doing which was drawing.
I had just officially broke from that torturous depression and I don't plan on going back. I decided I wanted to start off fresh with a new account and some updated characters. I feel that my old fursonas are all tainted because they were both involved in various instances and I feel really uncomfortable bringing them back the same as they were. This is why Jill has had a major change from the ground up. Almost everything about is revamped to be a new character. I may do the same for Alisia at some point in the future.
As for old unfinished commissions. Sadly during my depression I couldn't bring myself to complete them. I no longer wish to continue those pieces so I have fully refunded all of those I can remember. If I have missed anyone please contact me through my PMs to let me know. I am truly sorry that you guys had to be caught up in this mess.
I am not too sure what directions I am taking this account. Most likely it will be a mix of things, but I have changed as a person over these years and many of my old interests have also changed. This now brings us into the topic of my relationship with
taluthus. Unfortunately, I had also pushed him away during my leave and no longer have the same old spark I used to. But despite that, we are still very close friends because we've known each other for many years and have supported one another for a long time. With that said, our characters, Taluthus and Jill will still be together as a symbol of our strong friendship. We both agreed that the two work very well for each other and wanted to keep the two going.
I'm not very sure if any of what I have written made that much sense because this is quite a hard topic to bring up. I am still healing and I want to come back and make some friends again. I don't know where I am going from this point onwards, but definitely somewhere much happier.
So this is the new me at the start of 2019. Hope that we'll all have some fun again.
greatwhitejill under a new account.Some of you may have many questions but I will try and explain the situation that happened as best as I can.
To be frank, I fell into a dark place. I left for a really long time to try and cope with what was going on. For the longest time it really wasn't working out. I became reclusive, started to cut connections from friends and those close to me, and became more a lone as time passed. Things just got way too much for me to handle.
To keep a long story short. This was caused by several things, the high pressure that was put on me in my final college years and the interactions with a few bad eggs I had with the community. I will not be naming names. Period.
These interactions ranged from violations of my denial for requests of advancements in various ways, unsolicited nudes, and in one specific instance, the mental torture of blaming me for their own personal bad happenings irl when I refuse to be with them. The were from the people I thought were my friends at the time. I was clearly wrong. From this, my anxiety shot through the roof. I didn't know who to trust and kept all of my problems bottled up. This was a mistake. It affected me so badly in so many ways I even at one point started to give up on many things, including the one thing I loved doing which was drawing.
I had just officially broke from that torturous depression and I don't plan on going back. I decided I wanted to start off fresh with a new account and some updated characters. I feel that my old fursonas are all tainted because they were both involved in various instances and I feel really uncomfortable bringing them back the same as they were. This is why Jill has had a major change from the ground up. Almost everything about is revamped to be a new character. I may do the same for Alisia at some point in the future.
As for old unfinished commissions. Sadly during my depression I couldn't bring myself to complete them. I no longer wish to continue those pieces so I have fully refunded all of those I can remember. If I have missed anyone please contact me through my PMs to let me know. I am truly sorry that you guys had to be caught up in this mess.
I am not too sure what directions I am taking this account. Most likely it will be a mix of things, but I have changed as a person over these years and many of my old interests have also changed. This now brings us into the topic of my relationship with
taluthus. Unfortunately, I had also pushed him away during my leave and no longer have the same old spark I used to. But despite that, we are still very close friends because we've known each other for many years and have supported one another for a long time. With that said, our characters, Taluthus and Jill will still be together as a symbol of our strong friendship. We both agreed that the two work very well for each other and wanted to keep the two going.I'm not very sure if any of what I have written made that much sense because this is quite a hard topic to bring up. I am still healing and I want to come back and make some friends again. I don't know where I am going from this point onwards, but definitely somewhere much happier.
So this is the new me at the start of 2019. Hope that we'll all have some fun again.
Honestly, it's awesome that you two still get to keep being cool, that and you redesigning jill to be brand new only makes it more fun to get to learn about the new her. And get to see what sorts of things you'll get to do in the future too.
If you ever do get to Alisa and make her ground up too, it would be cool. I did really enjoy her design. Maybe it's just me, but I love to see old, nice designed characters not left and forgotten.
Uhhh.... I forgot what else I was going to say. Hope you ha e nothibg but good times as things go by!
And yes. Its awful to have good characters be put down for such reasons. I really want to bring Alisia back.
It's been a long time and I know I would love to get to draw you some fun stuff again.
Glad to see yah
i only hope that my many attempts to reach out to you ultimately helped you to come out from your depression at least a little sooner than it otherwise might have, and I tried to remain just as supportive and caring as I had always promised you that I would.
I still in all honesty, have very strong feelings, that I doubt will ever go away, and as such, I do hope that over time, this new Jill may warm up to me just as well as the older one did. No matter how long you dissappear for, or how far gone or lost it looks like you have become, im still going to be standing there with a paw outstretched to reach out to you and pull you back whenever you go ahead and grab it, just waiting to welcome you back again. It saddens me greatly that these *individuals* still have been plaguing you mentally, and I am hopeful that you can finally find peace, and return to the bubbly wonderful happy girl that i did fall in love with.
Know that no matter what our relationship may be, friends, IC partners, IRL partners even, ill always still be here.
<3
sune
They have your back, and never desert you.