mate i know it may seem that life is out to get you, just remember, things wont always be like this, life gets better, when i thought i had cancer i thought that was it and life was over but i eventually came around and believe me when i say this, dont worry about it too much, you're basically putting yourself through it twice, i know life sucks and is absolutely shit and it is but there are things that are worth all of the pain, do worry but not too much.