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To Anonymous...
19 years ago
General
...
very few things take the wind out of my indignation sails quite like the honesty, simplicity, and hope within your every word. I need to thank you for that, and apologize for mucking up your page with my hate. I don't like that I came to speaking so harshly, and amid the tirades of indignation and rage, I see now that the point of what I have attempted to say has been lost.
Hurtful people are irrecoverable. They'll use you until they have what they want; then they can manufacture anger, blame, and resentment to get rid of you once it's all said and done. If they aren't hurtful, if you just tell them you'll miss them and that all will be forgiven before giving them the long goodbye, they will eventually reconsider the lack of reason and return. If they're reasonable people, they'll even make up their own reasons to speak to you again, if only for the lingering need to tie loose ends.
I have repeatedly reminded myself that I have never had the opportunity to know you personally and perhaps I never will.
I have to write myself a reality check whenever I speak to an artist I respect so much.
And I know it is distinctly -not- my place to 'protect' you...
But all Gods and Nations be damned; I don't want you to be hurting, <name deleted for privacy>!! ;_;
I -want- an excuse to care. I must acknowledge now: The only reason I try to toss in my two cents on these journal posts or in your art is because I wish I could at least have a hope that something I say or do might have at least a meager positive influence; that even if the advice is bad, I can be reassured in knowing that you're wise enough to know whether or not to take it.
I don't even see you as much of a victim; there is a difference between a bullseye and a shield. The values you hold and the virtue you represent place you among the ranks of heroes in my mind. Sweet, generous, caring, insightful, sensitive... I can't imagine a person who would make a better friend. That's furthermore why it can disturb me so much that there is trouble or lacking anywhere in your life.
...i'm sorry I'm such a pain for writing such sappy, sentimental drivel, especially about you. I'd understand completely if you'd be creeped out by now. It has been incredibly hard keeping these feelings to myself if only for the hope that they do not upset you. I pray they will not, now.
with love and respect,
Stoney
very few things take the wind out of my indignation sails quite like the honesty, simplicity, and hope within your every word. I need to thank you for that, and apologize for mucking up your page with my hate. I don't like that I came to speaking so harshly, and amid the tirades of indignation and rage, I see now that the point of what I have attempted to say has been lost.
Hurtful people are irrecoverable. They'll use you until they have what they want; then they can manufacture anger, blame, and resentment to get rid of you once it's all said and done. If they aren't hurtful, if you just tell them you'll miss them and that all will be forgiven before giving them the long goodbye, they will eventually reconsider the lack of reason and return. If they're reasonable people, they'll even make up their own reasons to speak to you again, if only for the lingering need to tie loose ends.
I have repeatedly reminded myself that I have never had the opportunity to know you personally and perhaps I never will.
I have to write myself a reality check whenever I speak to an artist I respect so much.
And I know it is distinctly -not- my place to 'protect' you...
But all Gods and Nations be damned; I don't want you to be hurting, <name deleted for privacy>!! ;_;
I -want- an excuse to care. I must acknowledge now: The only reason I try to toss in my two cents on these journal posts or in your art is because I wish I could at least have a hope that something I say or do might have at least a meager positive influence; that even if the advice is bad, I can be reassured in knowing that you're wise enough to know whether or not to take it.
I don't even see you as much of a victim; there is a difference between a bullseye and a shield. The values you hold and the virtue you represent place you among the ranks of heroes in my mind. Sweet, generous, caring, insightful, sensitive... I can't imagine a person who would make a better friend. That's furthermore why it can disturb me so much that there is trouble or lacking anywhere in your life.
...i'm sorry I'm such a pain for writing such sappy, sentimental drivel, especially about you. I'd understand completely if you'd be creeped out by now. It has been incredibly hard keeping these feelings to myself if only for the hope that they do not upset you. I pray they will not, now.
with love and respect,
Stoney
a--this is someone I'd want to meet, the high regard you hold them to
b--if how you describe them is true, then i doubt that an apology was ever needed. except maybe, for yourself, on your part of saying it...which i don't condemn, i understand.
*hugz*