Welcome to 2020, subjects.

The rather tepid firework celebration is over and it's time to settle in with whatever tea my mood will fluctuate to on this incredibly dark 4pm, hopefully inspiring how best to word this journal to keep your attention. Do appreciate my consideration of your peasant interest and worship me with thrice the enthusiasm for this new decade. Frankly, I expect all of you to be FAR hornier on main for me than the disappointing display last year, much too little of the 'giving yourself for my needs permanently' type of attitude that I require.


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Okay okay yeah I'm playin' with you.

2019 was surprisingly eventful? So eventful in fact that I only got the chance to have some 'me' time this month two days ago—I didn't even have the time to write up a MFF journal! It didn't feel that way for most of it though; it was a year that seemed like two combined while simultaneously going by far too quickly. I got hit with a bizarre family crisis that meant a lot was happening in my life, while at the same time meant I couldn't get on with my life. My plans to move and do my master's degree were stunted by the development from a single week, so instead I stayed cozy in the little town I reside in waiting for a better opportunity in the new decade. I also went to the Netherlands again, but this time to meet furry friends, went to my first furcon (Confuzzled, UK), and my second con at MFF, which was the first time I travelled outside of Europe and the first time I met my partner after being together for five years online!? That's not even mentioning the massive amount of feelings from having friends I've known as far back as like, the beginning of 2012 giving me a hug, and friends that have given me extremely warm feelings suddenly just being people I can have around me to feel like I'm home. I went through what felt like half a year's worth of emotions that had to be condensed and tightly scheduled into four or so days.

A lot happened! Even with all that, there was enough negatives to make this feel like a dour year, but I'm still real grateful to everyone who helped carry me through. There's so much I want to elaborate on that I still don't really know where to begin.

So, let's go from the top then while avoiding the negative stuff:

Netherlands! I travelled with that adorable childlike child I invented to go stay with my longtime personal preyslut and Dio who's honestly too sweet to give a humiliating nickname to (for now). I'd been to the country before with my normie friends, so this was more for the comfort of finally seeing Guz in-person after so many years, meeting back with Dio and the comfort of a holiday... Both Dio and Guz almost didn't survive the trip~... Because we just missed a serial killer we could've run into in the local park. It was wild. And we had a good time! Lovely food, a few extra sights, some fun drunken memories I'm still thinking about and Hymin T-posed in three countries at once. All in all, Hymin ruins everything. Awful trip.

Confuzzled! I talked about it!!! Already!!! But I also wanted to mention say another thank you to the people I hung out with for being so pleasant, especially on my drunk nights where I even made friends with someone I had a little squabble with. Had a lovely time with the few new friends I made as well. <3

Midwest FurFest!!! God, I have so mant people I want to thank for making this such an incredible, revitalising con that I don't know where to start. Actually okay yes I do.

Thank you Sevi!!! I had a lovely time holding hands and finally being around them, and it was so worth it to bring along a cute outfit for our first date. Our sushi double date was lovely and I'm still mulling over the wonderful memories of little moments along the way. I'm hoping that somehow this year I can meet them alone to better spend time with them—a busy convention definitely isn't the best spot for a first date, but all things considered it really worked out. <3

MFF itself was insane!? I have too many people to thank and give shoutouts to, so I'll pick out the obvious ones: a quick thank you to my lovely roommates who were more than happy to help us whenever we needed it. More than anyone else, we definitely ended up hanging out with Ryekoh, Geight and the rest of the crew! I've said it to death with them, but it's been a long time since I've just been in the presence of a big group of people—some of which I only know a little—and just immediately feel comfortable. I still felt really overwhelmed by so much just casually happening and having to adapt to that, but I had an unforgettable time at the convention in large part due to their company. I don't want to go on and list every single person I met up because there were so many faces that it genuinely just felt like I was bumping into years of history every time I walked into somewhere different, and I know for sure I'm gonna leave someone out. Just know that it was an absolute delight to see you and if I didn't see you or only bumped into you quickly, I really hope I can see you another time and properly catch up.

Will give a little shoutout to the artists that drew my character though. Thank you so much to  Sparky_the_chu, Ghostie and  Spenzaroo's boyfriend Soul who seriously needs an FA or Twitter omg.

An extra little thank you to  Hybrid-Mind,  Goobie,  Bakap and against all odds  Takeh for keeping my nervous self distracted through my travels and coming along through my journey.

An extra thank you to Doopy who I always knew but really just adored spending time with this year. Thank you for all the positive energy you brought to us after MFF was over when I really needed it, and again to Bakap who I had a lovely time with :) for Christmas :).

Okay, that's it! I'm done typing! It's been an hour and some change. If you read this then thank you very much! I hope we have a lovely new year together with a lot more memories to fondly ponder through a pleasant 2020.

...2020.... Hindsight... OH I JUST GOT THE JOK—