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click if ur hornyy :3
5 years ago
Edit: THIS ONE'S A WRAP, FOLKS, STOP BEING HORNY NOW
TL;DR: Comment drawing requests. Be explicitly detailed, longwinded, and horny. I'll do the first one that gives me a boner.
You people aren't horny enough. You might think you are, but you're not. In fact, horny levels are CRITICALLY LOW.
Immediate action needs to be taken to remedy this situation. We are in desperate need of an influx of horny. We need 50 CCs of horny, stat. Therefor, in an effort to boost horny levels and also interact with all you lovely people that have decided my work is appealing (what the fuck), I have decided to do a thing.
I'm gonna be doing one request. While I'd love to do more, my isolation ends on Monday and I'm actually going to be have to work instead of just sitting around drawing porn all day, so it's gonna be just one. Can't be just any old request, though, because that'd be lame. I'd probably get something like "draw umbreon paws plz." Where's the fire in that? Where's the spirit, the spice, the joie de vivre? No, it's gotta be special. Worthy. Horny.
As such, here's how it's gonna go. You fine folks can drop your requests in the comments of this journal. Make them detailed. Make them loooong. Make them explicit and lewd. Most importantly, make them horny.
They don't have to be well written; the spirit of horny can shine through even the most broken of English. They don't even need to be on-topic all the way through. What I mean by that is, you can have your actual request be about a sentence long and then spend two paragraphs talking about how you want Zeraora to sit on your face so you can sniff and rim his tailhole for hours on end. All that matters is that you're operating at maximum horny. I'm talking levels of horny that exceed that of a rule34.xxx comments section, folks. If you are unaware of just how horny that can get, I think the comment on this post by Drainmyballs serves as a pretty good example.
First one to give me a boner gets it. This shouldn't be a horribly difficult task, as I haven't whacked it since September 20th. I'm hoping that since there's over 200 of you people, and some of you have wanted to give me actual money in exchange for art (what the fuck), at least one of you is gonna want one of my doodles enough to spit horniness at me.
alright go go go the more time you waste reading this is less time i can spend drawing something that makes your penis happy!!!!!
TL;DR: Comment drawing requests. Be explicitly detailed, longwinded, and horny. I'll do the first one that gives me a boner.
You people aren't horny enough. You might think you are, but you're not. In fact, horny levels are CRITICALLY LOW.
Immediate action needs to be taken to remedy this situation. We are in desperate need of an influx of horny. We need 50 CCs of horny, stat. Therefor, in an effort to boost horny levels and also interact with all you lovely people that have decided my work is appealing (what the fuck), I have decided to do a thing.
I'm gonna be doing one request. While I'd love to do more, my isolation ends on Monday and I'm actually going to be have to work instead of just sitting around drawing porn all day, so it's gonna be just one. Can't be just any old request, though, because that'd be lame. I'd probably get something like "draw umbreon paws plz." Where's the fire in that? Where's the spirit, the spice, the joie de vivre? No, it's gotta be special. Worthy. Horny.
As such, here's how it's gonna go. You fine folks can drop your requests in the comments of this journal. Make them detailed. Make them loooong. Make them explicit and lewd. Most importantly, make them horny.
They don't have to be well written; the spirit of horny can shine through even the most broken of English. They don't even need to be on-topic all the way through. What I mean by that is, you can have your actual request be about a sentence long and then spend two paragraphs talking about how you want Zeraora to sit on your face so you can sniff and rim his tailhole for hours on end. All that matters is that you're operating at maximum horny. I'm talking levels of horny that exceed that of a rule34.xxx comments section, folks. If you are unaware of just how horny that can get, I think the comment on this post by Drainmyballs serves as a pretty good example.
First one to give me a boner gets it. This shouldn't be a horribly difficult task, as I haven't whacked it since September 20th. I'm hoping that since there's over 200 of you people, and some of you have wanted to give me actual money in exchange for art (what the fuck), at least one of you is gonna want one of my doodles enough to spit horniness at me.
alright go go go the more time you waste reading this is less time i can spend drawing something that makes your penis happy!!!!!
This was fun! Good luck everyone!
since you did.... you know what... i'll keep it pokemon related
i hate roaming legendaries
after being weakened by a false swipe, suicune nonchalantly fled again form tje annoying trainer who woke it up, on it's pompous journey around johto, one fatal day, the legendary meet a wild vulpix "FIGHT ME"
"you really think you could stand a chance against me? fine, you won't endure a sing..."
vulpix uses quick attack
after an unknown amount of time, the defeated suicune wakes up in some kind of cave, chained and surrounded by a skulk of horny vulpixes
[color/=cyan]"What...where How...?!"[/color]
"it doesn't matter" said a familiar voice, interrupting the legendary beast; the smaller vulpox moves, leaving space for a large ninetales to pass
"your scent... what have you done?"
"you really believe i was gonna leave you fainted in the grass like a stupid human would? no... you're mine now, and i decided to share you with my family as our fucktoy"
YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS
shut up you wet bitch said the ninetales before refealing a cock big as his tails "hmm... first time i fuck somebdy after evolving... i think i'll start by destroying ylur legendary ass, then i'll leave the rest to the others"
"raikou and entei will rescue me, you'll see" it kept thinking while getting mounted from both sides, unaware of the fact that that annoying traimer has already caught them both
not-exactly-virgin-anymoretight-clenched Sylveon butthole. You want -fire- in your replies? Vulpix wants fire too. Vulpix wants fire so fucking bad he's literally crying on top of his eyes tearing up from the stink, the taste, dear god almighty the *taste*. It's not just shit, it's ANIMAL shit, that kitsune cub is outright selling his tongue's virginity as he sinks his claws into the soil as if bracing against the world itself will help him handle the flavor of digested monster filth. He's still doing it. He's still doing it because he can feel the energy inside, he can feel the power that brushes against his soul halfway between the warm caress of a lover and violent flaming power like his entire existence surging forward endlessly. He's still selling himself, he'll sell himself a thousand times over, he'll strain and strain and STRAIN and fucking S T R A I N forward, neck muscles boiling like his soul envisions that fucking Sylveon doing when he touches that crystal with his tongue tip, literally wriggling his taste bud laden saliva-slathered organ around inside that prissy boyfairy's chocolate starfish like it'll help him. All he has to do is TOUCH IT and he'll have a thousand years to live, a THOUSAND, a thousand whole years of incinerating entire families of this smug grinning bastard cat that's literally getting -off- to this, he can feel the same wetness he knows from lonely nights beneath the stars drooling down his chin instead of onto his paws... and the picture stops there. The picture stays like that forever, never advancing a single frame, never allowing its viewers the orgasmic culmination of knowing whether Vulpix got what he wanted or not.Frankly, -should- Vulpix get what he wants? He's so fucking desperate because his life MIGHT be a twentieth of what it would be if he just. licked. that. fucking. stone, but you know what he's going to DO for those thousand years if he succeeds? He's going to remember what he did for that power. I bet even with all the power of raw creation you possess you can barely handle intrusive thoughts for a thousand god damn seconds. A thousand YEARS? And on top of that, on top of that, you're a spoiled deity. Obsessed with clean Sylveon paws? Vulpix-slash-Ninetales will be, deserves to be, obsessed with unclean disgusting literally SHIT filled Sylveon tailhole. Every thought that runs through your pent-up mind about those paws? Ninetales has them. Ninetales has them worse. Ninetales has them but he can *taste* in them. Every night he can taste Sylveon butthole in his dreams. Every morning he wets his throat with water from a stream that tastes.. off, as if a monster had *gone* in it earlier. All life is nothing but bacteria given form; his taste buds are writhing wriggling microscopic bacteria and they're obsessed in a love-hate relationship with Sylveon shitcutter the same way the dinosaur spit that became your neurons is obsessed with Sylveon paws. He will NEVER NEVER NEVER be free of knowing what he did, what he -sold- like a literal whore, to evolve. But that's his privilege alone. The rest of us will only ever see the single frozen moment in time where he strained and STRAINED to dig his tongue deeper into fairydog chocolate starfish.
...oh, you already picked? Oh well. Still gonna hit enter on all this.
I have to do this one afterwards. God damn. You took me on a journey. You are the best commenter.