It is my birthday. Funny, last year, I did not expect to see how 2020 would go. I was expecting an average year. I did hear the word "Coronavirus" here and there, but until march, the fear, the stress, the panic... All of those seemed evitable. I mean, the last time I heard a scary (not new though) virus spread was ebola, and that ended up staying far far away. Unfortunately, this did become a global pandemic. And while Hungary managed to put up a great defense in the springtime, it is a little worse as autumn progresses. But I shall not let this pandemic, no matter how long, get the best of me, not as long as there's strenght and a drop of dignity in me. I've survived 29 years of being me. I've survived harassment, isolation, an apparent heart failure right at birth, decisions I'd regret later, conflicts with those I trusted the most in my life, and even myself. 29 years. Because life is not a comfortable, peaceful, quiet place, but a harsh, deadly, dangerous thing, and that's good. It keeps you challenged, and by being challenged, you develop, you become a better person, if you work on yourself. 10 years ago, I was a different man. You could say, I am not innocent. Whether it is my poor reaction to being bullied, or simply buying into a religion the sole purpose of which is to keep its believers in control of a singular man, or simply my own hubris (though it's more likely a mix of them all) and my deteroiating mental state at the time due to misfortunes upon misfortunes, I had entered the internet with a homophobic/transphobic heart. One I regret having as I find out one of my chatting partners I had a good relationship with was gay, harassing gay shippers and especially harboring anti-lgbt views was a mistake on my part. The time I spent as a Furry taught me many things, but I think the most important is my attitude towards the lgbt commuinty. Even if I still have some doubts to this day, and the current political climate (on both ends) spiraled into pure toxicity, one I fear would take its toll on my mental health, I side with my fellows, for I, as they, am not so different. I may have some severe flaws, my impatience, my short temper, my cowardice, and my strong distrust of people (and ease with which people can lose my trust) may still influence some of my thoughts, and I admit, the hole I dug myself into, I can not climb out of anymore, but as disgraced as I have been, I strive for peace and acceptance, however "odd" anyone is, for the truth is, this whole universe simply does not make sense, for you can try to understand it, but it still shows you something new, something contrary to how you thought it works. I think I may have the ability to spot red flags in people. Especially the very conservative kind... for I was raised in that mindset, and while as a naive child, I knew not better than to obey, nowadays, I am climbing towards the TRUE light, and realize what flawed that mindset truly is.

And here I am, just having released my first trans characters (a plan which I had since my latter high school days when I began embracing the gay), with 2 more on the way, and I shout: I feel better. I wish I could always avoid pointless anger, and perhaps one day, I may be a docile man. I am yet to face those who oppose a decision I made about 10 years ago. And I'll do everything in my power to resist their temptation back into that black hole. After all, I did not quit religious/conservative life just so I can return defeated. I am (at heart) the highest authority of TEAM EAGLE! And as that, I shall prevail, no matter what the stakes are. Let's just say, my respect can be lost very easily, and if anyone, those who live in opposition of my gay and trans fellows will be the quickest to suffer my godly wrath. If only Team Eagle was real, my very own army.