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Reflections on the Brony Fandom
4 years ago
General
Hey all. Today I wanted to take a journey down memory lane about how fandom life changed my own trajectory in this life. And surprisingly, it wasn't furries that pulled me out of the spiritual prison I was in to discover who I really am. That honor (or dishonor if you're religious) goes to a certain universe of colorful horses, and the controversial fandom that spawned from the fires of 4chan memes.
How I Became a Brony
So let's step into a time machine here. The year is 2011. I was still going to college as a junior and was involved in a music fraternity there. I had a much bigger circle of RL friends thanks to someone I met after I started college. He nudged the subject of MLP to me and encouraged me to check it out, knowing I was a fan of animation in general. The idea was so absurd, but then I thought to myself. I was already lurking for furry porn behind my religious parents back for 3 years now. I'm already drenched in weird to still being a hardcore believer in God while engaging in such "sin" that I convinced myself was harmless. So, I swallowed my pride and took the plunge into watching the first two episodes. It was entertaining, but nothing mind-blowing. A week later and I've already seen all episodes up to Sonic Rainboom, the episode that turned me into identifying as a brony for the first time. And like many others, I wanted to stuff my brain with brony content every day. I even joined a brony fanclub at my university, where I also met my first real life girlfriend.
Eventually, that lead me to a wonderful individual known as GabuEx. He was starting a project of his own known as My Little Investigations, and I wanted to help him out as a writer/game-designer. The project was certainly a success as we had amassed so much talent in a short amount of time. We released our first and only complete case in Spring of 2014. I remember also going to my first convention ever at that time. I felt saddened that I had missed out on such an amazing community in other fandoms before that one. It was also that same year where I got brave enough to make a ponysona/fursona and dive right into the furry fandom as well. My circle of friends grew so much online. I felt so alive and truly myself. WAY more than I had ever felt going to church, even when I took a very active role in the choir there. I noticed just how... fake my church friends were to me. And how much more politically driven they got while never being appealing to my own interests. For the first time in my life, I really did see Bronies as the "church" I always meant to be a part of.
That was my first journey into deconversion, but I will save that whole story for another journal.
Realizing Uncomfortable Truths
Anyway, with this new passion of mine, I couldn't help but notice some disturbing trends. First and foremost was all the pestering the fandom had done around the internet. It created a divide between the fandom I was a part of and others like furries that I was deeply entrenched in too. I have heard plenty of stories of bronies bullying others online for various reasons. And that it attracted quite unsavory people to sully the image. People that were holding extremist political views or pedophiles (Like ToonKritic) or most unfortunately, Chris-Chan and other cringe inducing spergs that lacked the bare minimum of passable social skills. These were things my parents warned me about, and I simply did not want to believe it back then. I hated fear mongering and was already old enough to not let that stop me from pursuing my passions.
But the more I think about it now, the more I realize how toxic the Brony fandom had been. Like with any passionate group, the image is never squeaky clean. I rewatched the John De Lancie's documentary and facepalmed so hard at how blatant it was at spreading mass propaganda. It never accurately described the Bronies in general and was just an expensive ad for Bronycon. While my two visits to Bronycon were absolutely a blast, especially when meeting my online friends for the first time, I couldn't help but start thinking about others who showed up and had a miserable time. My fears were confirmed when I heard about close online friends dreading that trip and experiencing the toxicity of the fandom up close.
Of course, in 2019 I was getting over my long obsession with MLP:FiM outside of always fun porn to view. I was firmly implanted with this community now. Obviously, I can't really say which fandom is better than the other, but now I view groups through a more critical lens. I can't forget all the good the Brony fandom did to my life and the friends I still hold strong from it. This fandom also has helped out a lot of charities too in its hey day. And with Generation 5 around the corner, I have to wonder if we'll see a big resurgence or not?
Final Thoughts
So, before any other bronies on this site think I'm some deserter to criticize the fandom, do realize that I still hold the fandom in a positive light. But it's important to not get swept up in the purity of any passion. If we don't do our job as a community to weed out troublesome people, then what sort of message are we sending to the world at large? Certainly one that does not demonstrate love and tolerance.
Yet, I still love the fandom in general and my fellow furries here as well. The convention life and being an art commissioner has been amazing to me. I stream games often with my friends too, while continuing to learn more about this vast world I am a part of. I hope this can continue as much as possible, even with my ongoing battle to establish my ground against my religious upbringing. I am Zeus. I am who I am. And I will do my damn best to befriend as many people as I can. Because the world is filled with too much hate. It needs more positivity. It needs more grounds to connect on.
The Equestrian utopia in the show may never happen, but we can fight to get there. Fandom culture can be an agent to get us there. Freedom from religious control can get us there. Fighting for truth can get us there. And my friends, I will be more than happy to encourage you to keep discovering yourself while fighting the good fight. Suffering isn't eternal, and neither is peaceful bliss. I portray myself as a God figure because I feel emboldened to inspire those around me to do better, even beyond the power fetish implications. I want to keep talking to people in both fandoms because it helps me out in my own struggles too.
So, all that said... I love you all and may everyone find their spark to make a positive change in your lives. <3
How I Became a Brony
So let's step into a time machine here. The year is 2011. I was still going to college as a junior and was involved in a music fraternity there. I had a much bigger circle of RL friends thanks to someone I met after I started college. He nudged the subject of MLP to me and encouraged me to check it out, knowing I was a fan of animation in general. The idea was so absurd, but then I thought to myself. I was already lurking for furry porn behind my religious parents back for 3 years now. I'm already drenched in weird to still being a hardcore believer in God while engaging in such "sin" that I convinced myself was harmless. So, I swallowed my pride and took the plunge into watching the first two episodes. It was entertaining, but nothing mind-blowing. A week later and I've already seen all episodes up to Sonic Rainboom, the episode that turned me into identifying as a brony for the first time. And like many others, I wanted to stuff my brain with brony content every day. I even joined a brony fanclub at my university, where I also met my first real life girlfriend.
Eventually, that lead me to a wonderful individual known as GabuEx. He was starting a project of his own known as My Little Investigations, and I wanted to help him out as a writer/game-designer. The project was certainly a success as we had amassed so much talent in a short amount of time. We released our first and only complete case in Spring of 2014. I remember also going to my first convention ever at that time. I felt saddened that I had missed out on such an amazing community in other fandoms before that one. It was also that same year where I got brave enough to make a ponysona/fursona and dive right into the furry fandom as well. My circle of friends grew so much online. I felt so alive and truly myself. WAY more than I had ever felt going to church, even when I took a very active role in the choir there. I noticed just how... fake my church friends were to me. And how much more politically driven they got while never being appealing to my own interests. For the first time in my life, I really did see Bronies as the "church" I always meant to be a part of.
That was my first journey into deconversion, but I will save that whole story for another journal.
Realizing Uncomfortable Truths
Anyway, with this new passion of mine, I couldn't help but notice some disturbing trends. First and foremost was all the pestering the fandom had done around the internet. It created a divide between the fandom I was a part of and others like furries that I was deeply entrenched in too. I have heard plenty of stories of bronies bullying others online for various reasons. And that it attracted quite unsavory people to sully the image. People that were holding extremist political views or pedophiles (Like ToonKritic) or most unfortunately, Chris-Chan and other cringe inducing spergs that lacked the bare minimum of passable social skills. These were things my parents warned me about, and I simply did not want to believe it back then. I hated fear mongering and was already old enough to not let that stop me from pursuing my passions.
But the more I think about it now, the more I realize how toxic the Brony fandom had been. Like with any passionate group, the image is never squeaky clean. I rewatched the John De Lancie's documentary and facepalmed so hard at how blatant it was at spreading mass propaganda. It never accurately described the Bronies in general and was just an expensive ad for Bronycon. While my two visits to Bronycon were absolutely a blast, especially when meeting my online friends for the first time, I couldn't help but start thinking about others who showed up and had a miserable time. My fears were confirmed when I heard about close online friends dreading that trip and experiencing the toxicity of the fandom up close.
Of course, in 2019 I was getting over my long obsession with MLP:FiM outside of always fun porn to view. I was firmly implanted with this community now. Obviously, I can't really say which fandom is better than the other, but now I view groups through a more critical lens. I can't forget all the good the Brony fandom did to my life and the friends I still hold strong from it. This fandom also has helped out a lot of charities too in its hey day. And with Generation 5 around the corner, I have to wonder if we'll see a big resurgence or not?
Final Thoughts
So, before any other bronies on this site think I'm some deserter to criticize the fandom, do realize that I still hold the fandom in a positive light. But it's important to not get swept up in the purity of any passion. If we don't do our job as a community to weed out troublesome people, then what sort of message are we sending to the world at large? Certainly one that does not demonstrate love and tolerance.
Yet, I still love the fandom in general and my fellow furries here as well. The convention life and being an art commissioner has been amazing to me. I stream games often with my friends too, while continuing to learn more about this vast world I am a part of. I hope this can continue as much as possible, even with my ongoing battle to establish my ground against my religious upbringing. I am Zeus. I am who I am. And I will do my damn best to befriend as many people as I can. Because the world is filled with too much hate. It needs more positivity. It needs more grounds to connect on.
The Equestrian utopia in the show may never happen, but we can fight to get there. Fandom culture can be an agent to get us there. Freedom from religious control can get us there. Fighting for truth can get us there. And my friends, I will be more than happy to encourage you to keep discovering yourself while fighting the good fight. Suffering isn't eternal, and neither is peaceful bliss. I portray myself as a God figure because I feel emboldened to inspire those around me to do better, even beyond the power fetish implications. I want to keep talking to people in both fandoms because it helps me out in my own struggles too.
So, all that said... I love you all and may everyone find their spark to make a positive change in your lives. <3
The fandom died off from me when the show was in Season 5 and i was midway into Season 4 to catch up. However I still draw my MLP OCs and what not because they've been around for so many years. I'm not really into MLP as much anymore, but I still like to see the cool art of all kinds made by artists all around. Or commissioners getting cool art whether SFW or NSFW.
I will say to finish off, the Fandom has been a positive experience.
Hopefully not. Bigger isn't always better, and when things spiral too big out of control... well.
The fandom is as big as it needs to be right now. As much as I miss having pony music recommendations left and right I thin it's a net positive to have a small, close-knit fandom than a fandom with no need being as large as it was. Not again.
I still am more open about being a brony to others than a furry in public because of that. However, I have found my better and more stable community here. Everyone finds their own path in life. ^^