I'd just like to extend a merry christmas to anyone still reading these. Like anyone else, I'm hoping for a more productive 2015. It's been one hell of a slacking year, where I've been more busy passing my knowledge of 3D modeling on, than putting it to use. Been trying to get into a rhythm of just fiddling with it for at least 15 minutes a day, but I seem to be lacking the flair for it these days. Still, this is christmas, no time for downers! Time to be happy and keep moving forward! As always, there's one lesson that I will keep forcing down everyone's throats: No matter how deep the hole may seem, you can always climb out. Just need to keep looking for the exit.

I kinda lost track of this journal half-way through... So a merry christmas to you all, and a very happy new year, once we get that far.

Getting a little fed up with never finishing anything, due to getting bored with my projects too easily. And why do I get bored? Because I have to spend more times correcting mistakes, than actually making anything. Seeing as winter has done nothing to help my creativity along, I've spent it analyzing my work to figure out where and when it goes wrong. Because it certainly goes wrong. And it happens every time. And it's always the same thing!

Yes, I've learned many new techniques, but they are to be applied after the problem has already occured, which only causes more problems. The problem, is my modeling skills. Not only is my work lacking in detail, but I also lose the user friendliness of the model that I strive to provide myself along the way, to easily edit stuff that I simply forgot about.

So yeah, going to look into refining my modeling skills, possibly look into new styles. Over a year on here and just one half-assed model...not good enough, Alex. Not. Good. Enough. So yeah, we'll continue as is, nothing will be uploaded here for a while. Going to make a playlist, and let the music inspire me to create something. If I fuck it up, I make a note of how, when and why, dump the project and move onto the next, and avoid that same mistake. Constantly having to fix things just takes the joy out of 3D modeling, so might as well try to get it right, or extremely close the 1st time.

So yeah, don't know when we'll see something new on here. Going to model random stuff until I get it right the first time, then I'll jump over to creating seperate parts of the furry body, until I get it right the 1st time, and then I'll get back to the greatly neglected Faust Xylerfield project.

So I shall now dive into intensive training. Lionbutt out!

As stated in my previous journal; yes, I often enjoy me some concept development. So if anyone happen to run into some problems in their daily life/feel the tools they use are inadequate, or just something you wish could be improved, write it here. I love tinkering and developing. Feel free to check in with friends and family as well, see if they have anything.

I read a poster once saying "everything has already been invented." well I say challenge accepted.

I'm amazed, to say the least. I'm extremely ecstatic when I look back at what this year has brought. Ups, downs. Friends, foes. I've loved and I've lost. Some things could've gone differently to achieve better results, but I'm not gonna think about what could've been, and all the other "What if" moments. That's the kind of stuff that calls forth a depression. And also, I'll admit there are those of you I should've stayed more in touch with. Especially  ZaryaRaccoon. It's just that I feel bad I can't do a darn thing for you, and so find it hard to even say "hi". You deserve better than what the world's been giving you so far, buddy.

But it's not all excuses from here. Many, MANY good things have happened during my time here so far. And those are the things to focus on.  Stripekazama and  Leophan, my relationship to you two speaks for itself. Not only did Stripe pull me out of my many years of loneliness and stick with me, but he also introduced me to this norwegian lion. We've since talked, laughed and cried, and are now a little furry family. Funny how these things work out. A rock solid trio, whose foundations cannot be shaken even by the mightiest earthquake. We're a team, we're a family, and my theoretical deity I love you guys.

Then there's  Tadcooga. Not just an amazing artist, but also an inspiring person who, in the face of the worst we as people can imagine, still manages to put on a bright smile and keep the darkness at bay. Always filling his art to the brim with passion to a point unmatched even by the frickin' mona lisa. And despite this massive talent, he's modest and down to earth, and a fantastic friend.

I have met too many wonderful people in this fandom to list here. But if you're readin this, then the following is for you:

Thanks. From the bottom of my heart and any other organ. I cherish each of you. I value each of you highly. I took a leap of faith into this community, and for every new acquaintance, for every new watcher, I feel so great about that decision. I deeply regret not talking much to many of you, but man...I suck at smalltalk, and for some reason can't bring myself to do it. As most may have noticed, the only times we really talk, is when you have problems. I really want to do my part to help change that, but I just don't know HOW to bring myself to do that. Really, I have so many on my Skype. I click their names and start to think of something to say, but it just sounds stupid and uninteresting, and I delete it and try again some other day with the same result. Having been socially inactive for 7 years has left its mark. It'll take some time to fix that.

But yeah, big thanks to all of ya.

On the artsy side, ordering a new mouse for nov. 1. Then I can at least get back to modeling (Even playing Borderlands 2 is extremely hard and frustrating with a mouse that either double clicks, or doesn't register a click at all.)! But alas, can't do much texture work until after christmas, as that's when I'll buy a tablet. No money sucks! Hopefully my monitor won't die completely before new years, although it does seem to be getting close.

Some of you may know I've talked a lot about  Zorryn lately, and admired his work. After a chat with him on IRC, I've thrown a little training project together in an attempt to apply professional techniques to my work, and greatly improve the detail. Yeah, the techniques may seem pretty standard to those versed in the ways of 3D, but UV-maps always kind of scared me, and I've been avoiding them all the time and tried to work around them. I'll be modest and say I think I did OK without, but when you look at what's possible with a UV-map (Zorryn's work, as an example), you look back to your own stuff and go "Huh...this could be so much better". And as always, if I feel inferior, I improve. And really, with 1 focused look at it all, it really isn't much to take in. In just a week I've put together a training project covering all the aspects I wish to learn, and I'm almost through every step.

The training exercise is basicly to create a good old fashioned greek pillar, modeling just the base shape, and leaving all details to the normal and displacement maps, and with my achilles heel having always been Photoshop, well...coming up with something that looks good is the big challenge at the moment. That said, I've already made some test maps consisting of quick scribbles on the UV-map, and applied them to the project. So creation and application have been nailed, but yeah, my artistic talent in photoshop is lacking. But I might have a few solutions up my sleeve. Next update will be the finished pillar, and then It's back to Faust, where these new techniques will be applied.

So, after nearly 2 months (Or maybe it was more?) of complete inactivity, I finally seem to have re-ignited that creative little flame inside. Yup, back to work on the Faust model, and now only 1 subdivision phase away from having the geometry done :D

Seeing as I have the Fur shader from the Alex model, that part shouldn't take long to get through. But anyway, getting ahead of myself here...

I scrapped the First draft of the Faust model back in the days, due to a bright idea (And it sure has paid off). The idea? To apply the box modeling techniques usually used for modeling cars. This has left me with a clean mesh, something I've never really had the pleasure of working with before, due to my usual f*beep*-ups.

Basicly, you take a box, and create a rough outline of the model through extrusions. Then sub-divide, add detail, sub-divide, add detail, sub-divide, add detail. To some, this may come across as standard box modeling. but yeah...I just laid down one night and constructed the model in my head, carefully planning out how many subdivisions I should start out with. The magic number: 2.

If I keep this pace up, I'll have a little preview of the finished geometry up early next week. With the guild wars 2 beta weekend though, I won't be getting anything done starting tomorrow afternoon. So yeah, back to Softimage I go, time to compensate for the past months.

Also, Faust, unlike Alex, has colour variations in his fur. This'll be a bit of a challenge, but I should be able to make the fur inherit the colour attributes of the underlying geometry. If I can indeed pull that off, it's as simple as painting the model with the wonderful tool that is Zbrush. If my theory works out...then holy crap, I'll impress even myself, as that'll bring a whole new level of detail to my work. And considdering the endless possibilities of the ICE engine, it should indeed be possible. "Just" a matter of building the right ICE tree. If I make it work as intended, I'll of course put up the ICE tree on here with an explanation of how it works, in case there are other modeling enthusiasts watching me.

And now that we're on the sharing bit, I've been considdering livestreaming work sessions. But in all honesty, I'm nowhere near dedicated enough for that sort of stuff. I pretty much do this stuff on and off at my own leisure. With that said, for my next model project, which will be a re-make of Alex from scratch, applying all of my new techniques, I'll try to either livestream, or record a tutorial with commentary. But all of that stuff in due time.

Back in November, I started talking to some of you about a little project I wanted to do titled "To be a furry", which would be a video with a 3D motion tracked Alex sitting next to me, as "we" explain what it means to be a furry, based on answers that the community would provide to that question. It never really kicked off, as you may have noticed. For starters, I got about 2 answers in total. Second, I never rigged Alex, as I wasn't satisfied with how the model turned out. So I'll keep that one in the project folder for later. (Speaking of which, 38 projects lined up in that folder so far.)

For now though, it's just characters, characters, characters. Will be fun to have a library of characters to play around with, and I'll pull a few animation tests once I get some done and rigged. Maybe even create some animation sets. It'll be a pain without motion capture technology, but it's certainly doable with some blood, sweat and tears....well, mostly sweat and tears...or just tears.

So there's a lot going on lately. Job hunting, furmeets, breaking up with a fantastic guy, and the mood to sit down with some coffee and get some work done just hasn't been there lately. It'll be back eventually.

Instead, I've made this little journal entry to highlight and talk about Alexander's 3 attributes, which will drive the plot of Project Lionheart. The theme of the movie is simply Despair, and all that it brings. Alexander will have to find these 3 attributes within himself in order to overcome that despair.

The core of the movie is based around a 7 year period in my own life of fighting my inner demons, so to say. I won that war, and boiled the entire experience down to a simple motto, the 3 attributes.

Strength - to endure and overcome all hardships in life

Courage - to look at your past with no regrets, and your future without fear or doubt

Pride - to accept yourself

Obviously my own story wouldn't be as action packed and high-fantasy as Project Lionheart. I'm not trying to make art, I'm trying to make entertainment :P.

So if anyone reading this has lost the will to live. Find the strength to give life a chance, have the courage to forgive yourself and learn from your past to form a brighter future, and be proud of who you are. We're all different, no one's "normal" or "perfect", you're fine just the way you are.

So, work on Project Lionheart is slowly, but steadily- No, just slowly progressing. My fursona, Alexander Leonhart, who also happens to be the main character in Project Lionheart, has FINALLY entered Phase 2, after re-designing the head 5-6 times. I'll say it again: I am extremely picky with the quality of my work.

So what is Phase 2? Where Phase 1 was simply molding the base shape of the character, sort of like the sketching phase for those who like drawing, phase 2 is where all the anatomic details are stuffed in. We're talking muscles, eyes, teeth, tongue, muscles, claws/nails. Simply put: Every little bit of detail.

Besides that, some new stuff has been added on the frontpage:

Lionheart: Evolved

So I was listening to this track the other day (And still am, it's simply awesome) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qt2v.....eature=feedlik
And some images started rolling through my head of a more slightly more futuristic Alexander with dual pistols, kicking ass left and right. And I figured I could work with that (at some point). I'm hoping to turn this one into a series though. We'll see how that turns out. First off though, is Project Lionheart.

Brainfarts

Every once in a while, something completely out-of-this-world-apeshit decides to get on a train, and take a suicide run right through my brain. It can be an odd concept, a comedy sketch...anything, really. These will all be animated at some point of course.

Extreme Gardening

This kinda just "Happened" on FA's IRC yesterday. People were talking about ways to die, and I figured "Screw it, let's top this before it goes out of hand." And so, a wild brainfart appeared. Extreme Gardening.

Extreme gardening is a sport. Here's what you need:

2 planes
2 bushes (1 in each plane)
2 "athletes" (1 in each plane)
2 tools (1 in each plane) - These can be anything from lawnmowers to rocket launchers.

The flow of the game: the planes take off, and at a reasonable height, the bushes (which will have a boulder tied to them, and a depth cutter on the rope that cuts the line once it's 5 meters below water) will be dropped. The athletes, not wearing a parachute, will jump out immediately after the bushes, carrying their tool. In this example, we'll use rocket launchers! The athletes then need to trim the bushes to the shape of a duck using the tool they've been given. The athlete with the bush that best resembles a duck when they all hit the water, wins. And seeing as there's no parachutes, try not to land on your stomach!

Furry shorts

This one will be all those little comedy sketches I have slushing around inside my brain. More detail on that once I get around to actually start working on the concept.

Furryfication

While working on my character Alex, I've run into countless design challenges. A male lions head without a mane, what would that look like? I didn't want to just go and model a tigers head, or a female lions head. There are some subtle yet noticable anatomical differences.

Combining a lion with a human, what would that look like? Naturaly, the hardest parts to imagine, were the parts where said subjects were actually fused. We're talking footpaws, paws, head, how to join the tail properly to the body, and when should I considder it too long.

And I figured: "Well, I can't be the only one in the world with this problem. Luckily I can sit here and mold it to my liking in Softimage, but what about those that can't really visualise or describe their fursona?" And so, this feature was born. I get a massive challenge, and the client gets a product that they can either use, use as a reference, use to visually describe the differences between their fursona, and the character they've been given, or simply throw it away.

Furry bonds

Pretty self-explanatory I think.

Even test renders take time, so I figured I'd provide a bit of background info:

So who is Alexander Leonhart?

Alex is, in essence, the embodiment of the qualities in me that I cherish most. Based on those qualities and my love for lions, the choice of appearance was rather obvious. The concept started out as JUST a lion. From there, it evolved into a lion with wings! Then I stripped the wings off of him, and turned him into an anthro lion. I was really pleased with the looks of that concept, and so I began developing it further.

And what about yourself?

Well...Not really big on this subject, but I will talk about my history with 3D modeling and video editing.
In my early years, I was a bit of a paper-and-tape wizard. I'd make little scenes out of paper and tape to the point where it almost seemed like an obsession. I'm fairly certain that's where it all began. Later in life, during my Counter-strike years (We've all had those), I discovered Milkshape! And I started modeling weapons. Never managed to implement them though, as that was an entirely different ballgame. Then I discovered the wonderful world of 3D studio MAX. And what an overwhelming world that was! I had absolutely no clue where to start, or where to find out where to start. So I poked around the UI a bit, and soon I had my first box! (YAY!). I wasn't really all too active with 3DSM for several years, and then I made a massive mistake: I volunteered to make a 3D model AND animation of a high-tech parking garage me and my group "developed" for a project in "College" (I say "College" because I have no clue what the actual translation is. In danish, it's called HTX :S)

So yeah, I shot myself in the foot there, but surprisingly enough, I managed to complete the model and animation. The quality was horrible, but the reception it received was rather overwhelming. And since then, for every project, I was tasked with making an animation. (FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!)

So...yeah. Over those years, the quality didn't improve all too much, but I did learn some techniques, and how to use the various tools.

Then I started studying "Technical designs" A.K.A: drawing houses and machine parts in various CAD software. Again, there was a 3D element. (Sketch-up for houses, Inventor for machines!) And yeah...I always got the 3D assignments. Somehow it was just extremely easy to achieve decent results in those 2 programs.

Then came my internship for a life raft company. Basicly I just had to brush up old CAD drawings (ZzzzZZZZzzzZZZZzz). And then came mistake number 2: Another volunteer project.

Because I was bored senseless, I (Oh, test render done, better finish this up) decided to go up to my boss, and offer him an animation, demonstrating their chute evacuation system. Learning elements included: Creating realistic water, creating, rigging AND animating a character, CREATING HALF A FREAKING CRUISE SHIP. AND FIGURING OUT THE 3DSM CLOTH MECHANICS! AAAAARGH! STUPID MISTAKE!

Again, I managed. Don't think they ever used it on their training DVDs though, as the cloth just seemed....weird :P

So then I started training some more at home, making some characters, among those my first attempt at an anthro wolf. Didn't turn out too well, but that has since been remedied. Also started playing around with many other aspects of 3DSM.

And then just 2 months ago, I made the switch from 3DSM to Softimage. Yeah, there was a lot of new stuff, and I gotta say, I'm still struggling with some aspects of it, but I'll have it down soon. My arch enemy at the moment is the ICE engine.

Back to Alex, what does he look like, you damn slowpoke!?

Heh, well first off, I suck at describing ANYTHING that's slushing around in my head (Which is where I keep the concept art for...well...everything). Really wish I could draw. But wishing alone won't get me too far, so I'm practicing a bit every day on that account. Would be nice to be able to get that concept art out on paper at some point. As for the slowpoke part, yeah...I slack a lot. If I manage to fiddle around with that model for even 15 minutes a day, that's one for the history books. Truth be told, the Alex model could've been done and posted 2 weeks ago if I had shown just a bit of dedication there. But that's the nice thing about these projects, I go at my own pace...Although I gotta admit, if a snail were to race me to making a model, it would win hands down.

More will be added at a later point.

Finally cleared my schedule!

And Project Lionheart is already well under way. I've started modeling the first character, Alexander Leonhart. Fursona, and main character of the story (Selfish, I know..But hey!)

On the writing side of things: first 5 scenes are finished. I want to tie the lore of the world together a bit more, and maybe tie in some more sub-plots in the overall storyline, before I write the next scene. Every scene is being revised and checked against the lore and the finished scenes to avoid inconsistencies. I hate those as much as anyone else.

The next update will be about Alexander Leonhart, complete with a picture of the finished model. I'm guessing what people are wondering right now is "What quality is this guys work? Can he actually pull it off?". Hence why I'm pushing at least 1 character up the priority ladder for now, as I really am making some massive claims for someone who has nothing to show.

So check back in a few weeks! (Yeah, I slack a lot, sorry. Don't wanna let the project stress me out though. This IS a hobby thing, after all.)