Over a year since I was here, forgot I had planned to put photos up. Well my excuse is the lack of wild animals stalking the streets here. :(

So the plan is to get back into sketching using the infamous gfxtablet and perhaps, perhaps writing. Yeah...

Bidding on a 2nd hand camera so cross those digits. Really can't wait to get stuck into photography. Keep seeing things that I want to keep hold of, take a picture of, but alas the tools I do not have them. It sucks!

Christmas has been and gone and as a result I can afford to buy a camera. Photographic work incoming.

I would just like to offer everyone my best wishes for the season, whatever religion, creed or faith you follow. Have a good one and be nice to each other eh.

Today while walking home I saw a kestrel hunting. That is all.

Right. Thought I would just post a journal, any journal to get that other one off the page. Time to be looking forwards and being proactive.

Also, time for shopping for someone to do a commission for me. Hrrm. Suggestions welcome.

It is more than quite possible that I am an idiot. Yesterday I did something that most would consider reckless if not stupid and they would be mostly right.

But to be able to judge my actions you need to understand the whys a bit better and I'm not going to go into that here because well this isn't the place to be washing my dirty laundry.

I struggle with a compulsion on a daily basis, when things get to be too much in some ways the compulsion rears it's ugly head and starts prodding me "come on come on". For the most part I can stave it off and ignore it, finding ways to deal with it.

Yesterday, the first time in 7 years I wasn't able to. Several factors combined meant that I reached a threshold and gave in to the compulsion.

I understand that I have alienated friends, hurt those close to me and upset people who deserved better.

At the time though, I didn't feel I had a choice. What I did wasn't an attempt to hurt anyone, it was aimed at no one but myself and I regret that others were affected by my actions.

What I ask though is not for forgiveness but for understanding and a little patience. I know I am asking a lot.

Kissed any one of your Facebook friends? --- yes
Been arrested? --- no
Kissed someone you didn't like? --- no
Slept in until 5 PM? --- yes
Fallen asleep at work/school? --- yes
Ran a red light? --- no
Been suspended from school? --- no
Experienced love at first sight? --- yes
Totalled your car in an accident? --- no
Been fired from a job? --- yes
Fired somebody? --- no
Sang karaoke? --- yes
Pointed a gun at someone? --- yes
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? --- yes
Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? --- yes
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? ---yes
Kissed in the rain? --- yes
Had a close brush with death (your own)? --- Yes
Seen someone die? --- no
Played spin-the-bottle? --- yes
Sang in the shower? --- yes
Sat on a rooftop? --- yes
Taken pictures of yourself naked? --- no
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes? --- yes
Skipped school? --- yes
Eaten a bug? --- no
Sleepwalked? --- yes
Walked a moonlit beach?--- yes
Ridden a motorcycle? --- no
Dumped someone? --- yes
Forgotten your anniversary? --- no
Lied to avoid a ticket? --- no
Ridden on a helicopter? --- no
Shaved your head? --- no
Blacked out from drinking? --- no
Played a prank on someone? --- yes
Hit a home run? --- yes
Felt like killing someone? --- yup
Cross-dressed? --- yes..sorta
Been falling-down drunk? --- yes
Made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry? --- yes
Eaten a snake? --- no
Marched/Protested? --- no
Had Mexican jumping beans for pets? --- no
Puked on amusement ride? --- no
Seriously & intentionally boycotted something? --- no
Been in a band? --- no
Knitted? --- no
Been on TV? --- no
Shot a gun? --- yes
Skinny-dipped? --- no
Caused someone to need stitches? --- no
Ridden a surfboard? --- yes
Drank straight from a liquor bottle? --- yes
Had surgery? --- yes
Streaked? --- yes
Taken by ambulance to hospital? --- yes
Passed out when not drinking? --- yes
Peed on a bush? --- yes
Donated Blood? --- no
Grabbed electric fence? --- yes
Eaten alligator meat? --- no
Eaten cheesecake? --- oh gods yes
Eaten kids' Halloween candy? --- yep
Killed an animal when not hunting? --- no
Peed your pants in public? --- yes
Written graffiti? --- no
Still love someone you shouldn't? --- no
Think about the future? --- yes
Been in handcuffs? --- yes
Believe in love? --- yes
Sleep on a certain side of the bed? --- it varies


 black-draco

Yep back again on FA, time to dust off my little used art supplies and see if I can dredge something out of the swampy hole that is my mind. Been way to lax and uninspired and need to get my crap together. So fingers crossed.

Grr these things are hard to get used to. Combined with my newness to photoshop it's giving me a headache *grins*