Dragoneer, drown in shit and set yourself on fire.

Find me here: https://www.weasyl.com/~innoxium

As more fun stuff comes to light, I'm no longer able to continue using this website in good conscience. Who cares anyway? It's not like I use it much these days.

I will not will not WILL NOT be associated with rapists or misogynists or the people who make excuses for them. Not even remotely.

It was one thing when the mods were just selfish, incompetent, stupid, and really really really bad at planning, but this. This is such a brave, exciting new world of Go Fuck Yourself that it's making my ass tingle, and I'm not even the rape victim.

I mean, jesus christ on a rolling donut, even F.A.P. went out with more dignity than this. F.A.P.!!! That's not something I say lightly! At least that guy never fucked any dogs (that we found out about, anyway).

Fuck you, furries. This is why we can't have nice things.

Dragoneer & co., you are scum. Your days are numbered.

I'm outie

This is not news.

Still not leaving FA. All my stuff is here.

http://rabbitrabbit.bandcamp.com/album/ostraka

If you like this album, you should download it now. I will be deleting it from my site on Friday.

Soon after (a few weeks maybe), it will be replaced by its remake. Which is coming along great!

It's been three years. I feel a lot more more competent, but I still really like these old songs. Most of them, anyway. So the final track listing will be a bit different.

I feel like this time around, I can do these songs the justice they deserve.

New single coming soon too. :D

I challenged myself with completing an album within one month, and I did it. The goal was at least four songs, and I made five. woo~

The album is called One Moon, and it's kinda spacey and weird and minimal. Go see! It's totally free to download.

I also have a bunch of copies of Holy Spark still for sale at $10 plus shipping.

FUTURE PLANS AND SUCH:
By the end of April, I hope to have the online version of Holy Spark up on my Bandcamp for those of you who can't buy the hard copy version for whatever reasons. The online version will be slightly different.

By the end of May, I hope to have a new-ish album available on Bandcamp. I am taking Ostraka and remaking it, now that I know a little more about music. Ostraka will be gone, so if you really want it, go download it now!

And after May, I think I'm going to be taking a break from music to focus on making a webcomic. I've never really considered myself a musician anyway, and this two-year-long art block has been very discouraging. So now that I'm finally regaining the desire to draw, I feel I'd better capitalize on it.

I won't completely give up music, of course. I have an album project that I will pick at all the while. But I'm going to give it the time it deserves, and with everything going on in real life right now, it will definitely take a couple of years.

As for the Orpheic Drive computer game I was sort of working on, I don't think that's going to happen. I never really expected to be able to finish it, and it was really just useful as the inspiration for the album. If someone wants to take over the project and I could work in a director-type capacity, maybe, but I don't see it happening. I'm just not a video game maker guy, really.

setting goals and meeting them ftw

I neglected to mention. Yes, I'm making a new album!

What's it going to sound like? What will it be called? Will it be a concept album?

I HAVE NO IDEA, it's nowhere near finished.

It's an exercise to get me out of my funk. I'm going to churn out an album in one month. I've got one song down. About three more to go. :|

It'll probably be more like an EP, but that's okay, so far it's serving its purpose of getting my creative juices flowing again.

I'm just so tired of being a blob all the time. I go to sleep, go to work, go to sleep, go to work, and that's all I've been doing since I moved out. I'm trying to snap out of it, and sometimes something like this is the only way.

It'll be free, and available on my Bandcamp page.

Happy Leif Ericsson Day.

Happy birthday to meeeeee

My CD’s are in!!

H O L Y S P A R K

11 tracks, 40 minutes of awesome juicy robot disco bubblegum pop.

Here’s a preview: http://rabbitrabbit.bandcamp.com/album/bad-friends

They are for sale for $10 apiece, plus $3 shipping. E-mail me if you’d like one! prismbladeknight[at]juno.com

I’ll also be peddling them about FurCon. If you find me in person, I’ll knock off the S&H, of course.

pics and stuff on tumblr

Hotel:
Dunno.

Arrival/Departure:
Arriving Saturday night and staying until whenever. Yeah, gonna be a short trip this year.

Staying in the main hotel:
I dunno. :F

Means of transportation:
Foots

Sharing a room with:
I'm supposed to be curling up on the floor of Quietfire's room or something, people are bad about getting back to me.

Who do you hang out with:
Um, Bucker, Grapefruit... I dunno. Trying to make new friends. <=D

Gender:
boy man

Orientation:
homo

Status:
Single

How old are you:
26

Are you an Artist:
Yes

Are you a Fursuiter:
No

How many Fursuits are you going to bring/wear:
None

Which Characters:
Invisible Amy the Nonexistent Invisible Ghost

Any new suits or characters Debuting:
hand puppets

Attending parties:
As many as I can!

Do you drink:
YESSSSS <3

Do you smoke:
I'll swipe a puff of a friend's cigarette... but not really.

Can I buy you a drink:
yes :3

Can I give you lots of money:
Are you going to?

Are you attending any panels:
Not really... they're usually wanks.

Stage or public performance:
I might be attending, but I won't be performing... this time.

How do I identify myself to you:
"Hello, I am [name]." How does one usually do this??

Rules of engagement (physical Contact out of Suit):
"no" means "no"

Personality Type:
Introvert. I look like I'm angry and spiny and not having fun, but really I'm just shy and hoping someone will talk to me. ._.

How do I know if you're not looking to socialize (angry, busy or upset):
I'm always looking to socialize! I just look kinda scary.

What's the best way to find you:
Wave your wand and shout, "Accio Mitch!"

Do you do trades:
yus

Can I touch you:
Hugs are okay.

Can I hug or snuggle with you:
We'll see.

How tall are you:
6'2"

Are you nice:
Totally

Are you cliquey:
I am an ENTIRE CLIQUE! 83

Can I stalk you:
Would a stalker ask permission??

Do you like parties:
Love dem

If I see you, how should i get your attention:
Set yourself on fire? That would definitely work. If you're not up for that, waving and saying hello like a normal person might work in a pinch.

Can I ask ya to dance with me during the dances:
yes <3

Can I buy breakfast, lunch, or dinner sometime:
Food is yes

Can I take a picture of ya:
okay

Can I kidnap you for *censored*:
>_>

Are you going to commission art at the con:
no

Anything to add:
Buy my album! I'll have them with me for selling and they are great. :3

My new album, HOLY SPARK, will be out in January. The track list will be as follows:

1. Karaoke Style
2. Chant
3. Bad Friends
4. I'll Miss You When I Wake Up
5. Soteriology
6. We Are Holy Robots
7. Please Wait While Next Song Loads
8. Is Anyone There?
9. Mekhanizm
10. Insert Coin
11. Sun, Moon, Stars

More about the album:
It's mostly things you've heard before, except tested and re-tested and sent to an impromptu A&R team (THANK YOU, BETA LISTENERS!!!) mastered more fully (THANK YOU, BRIAN!!!!!) and chopped and weeded and varnished and slick, and some of the vocals were re-recorded until I was satisfied. It sounds great, guysssss, it really does <3

I am going to print 50 CD's and will be peddling them like a hobo at FC as well as taking online orders and mailing them like last time. Haven't decided what the price will be yet, still need to hammer out the fiscals, but it'll probably be average-CD-priced, amazingly enough. That wasn't helpful, was it? I'm sorry. I'm half asleep, WHADDAYAWANT

I really only wanted to make 20 or 30, but the way the pricing is set up makes it more economical to print 50. (It makes it more economical to print 5000, actually, but that's just silly, I only have my sock drawer to keep these things in.) So I'll need help spreading the word! Get your famous and "popufur" friends to retweet me and stuff, tell your friends, publish me in your church bulletin, scribble my phone number on insides of bathroom stall doors, WHATEVER! haha, don't really do that last one anymore guys really enough is enough getting propositioned by lonely homeless men is only funny the first dozen times ANYWAY

There will be an online release of this album as well, but it won't be quite the same. There will be no singing turrets on the online album (obviously), and also similar changes to keep certain entities from whining, I'm sure. So get the GOOD version now! :D

I love you all <3

I like to think I'm Lady Gaga or something

http://rabbitrabbit.bandcamp.com/

All the songs for my new album are done! And I finally have a tracklist I am happy with! Yayyyy!

Now comes the mastering. Un-yay. >:

I'm so baaad at mastering, but I can definitely use the practice...

As I think I've mentioned before, my current job at Hospital "A" has been giving me the shaft. More work, less pay, crappy hours, basically adding up to breaking my back working for what amounts to not enough pay to pay all the bills. No hope of moving out of the dull, stagnant town I grew up in. I've been searching for a new job for a couple of years now.

Well, I guess I finally made a breakthrough. The staffing agency I've been pestering all this time has finally come through for me, and now I got a full-time job at Hospital "B," doing exactly what I do now - just with less workload and more pay. I'm beyond thrilled. This will take SO much pressure off!

Of course, it's not EXACTLY the same. But some things are. My superior at work will go, "okay, here's a task I think you can do, it's not TOO complicated and I'll be here if you need help. It's called [insert name of task I've been doing all my adult life]. Think you can handle it?? 8D"

In fact, this job is pretty much a piece of cake so far. The office is quiet, never hectic, and the doctors at Hospital B are MUCH better behaved than what I'm used to at Hospital A. It's so peaceful that it's driving me nuts. I get antsy when I go eight hours and nothing catches fire or something. I didn't realize how used to chaos I had grown.

The hardest part is getting up at 4 AM to make it to work in time (6 AM). And even then, sometimes I don't miss the traffic somehow. Why is everybody up so damn early?? It's about an hour of commuting.

It's actually a pretty cool schedule, though, because I'm all done with work by 2:30 PM and I have the whole day left. Downside is my system will totally crash by 8 PM. My night life is suffering! Except for how I don't have one.

I think I'll be moving to the East Bay area soon to be closer to my job and farther from my parents' house. I THINK I can afford it, but I don't actually know how much I make yet. It's not really what I wanted. I'd hoped to move to the South Bay so I could be closer to the people I care about, but... oh well. If it's not meant to be, then it's not.

I still work at Hospital A too, officially, but since they aren't calling me in or giving me any hours, it's not really like having two jobs.

It's like my life is beginning anew! Except I'm all by myself and have no friends to share it with.

What's going to happen? Time will tell.

And I don't even know what this will do to my plans to move to Portland...

So I woke up this morning, looked around, and hated everything. I wanted to destroy destroy destroy.

I gotta get outta here. D:

 sage canard armand whitecabbage <3

The Oregon trip was pretty great.

First, a bit of background: I've actually been buds with Armand and Sage for not a small number of years now, ever since they found my music on FA and loved it, and then I found their music on FA and loved it back. Then a few years in, I met their significant others online as well and they're all a groovy bunch of guys + a gal. :]

We've been chatting and conspiring since 2007 or something like that. Every so often, I'd pull a "hey, I'll totally visit!" and then I'd not. Like a douchebag.

Well, with things coming to a head at work, it was kind of now-or-never. When Erik (Sage's S.O.) said they had some time off the last week of June, I was like, "alright, let's DO THIS."

I left California at the buttcrack of dawn on Wednesday and arrived at Mr. Erik and Mr. Sage's place at about 3:30 in the PM. We got roaring drunk and watched some movie or something (I forget because I was roaring drunk), and it was a contender for Best Night Of My Life. You guyssss <3 <3 <3

From then on, it was a laugh-a-minute romp, with movies and drunken Clue and smoking hookah and listening to vinyl records of hour-long droning pads and a trip to Powell's and a random cameo by a row of ducklings out of nowhere.



wak wak wak :v

Erik & Sage are an adorable married couple. They're doing it right. They kind of reminded me of what I want out of my life. I want what they have someday.

ar-MAAAAND (not "ARR-mind," like I've been pronouncing it for four years) is pretty much exactly how I thought he'd be, all chill and cool and whatnot. :]

And despite what her Tarot may say, Tracy is a nice nice lady. We should talk more. :v

And despite what ANYONE says, I totally do not have a crush on anyone in the room, I DO NOT, SHUT UP ERIK 8[

I was sad to leave. Not just because of the ten-hour drive (which suckeddddd), but... just because. Even if I had stayed longer, it still wouldn't have been long enough.

Which is why I'm going to move there.

I've had Portland on the brain for years now, so this is not really a knee-jerk decision. The music scene, the comics scene, the atmosphere, the fact that it's not FUCKING EXPENSIVE FOR EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE. Plus, I heard the phrase "you should move here" about ninety million times in two days. I've never felt more welcome, or more wanted.

Since the very minute I crossed the border back to California (not an exaggeration, the gas prices leaped into the air within mere YARDS of the border), I've been antsy. And weirdly resentful of absolutely everything.

So, yeah. I'm aiming for January. God, it's gonna be hard to find a job in time...

Typing this from  sage and  canard's couch!

...that is all.

<3

Short Version: A few weeks ago, work cut my pay by a few dollars an hour, and also cut my hours in half. Went from not-rich-but-okay to barely-gonna-make-ends-meet. I still (barely) have a job, but as you can imagine, this is kind of stressful. And then just the day before yesterday they cut my hours even further. 8(

In-Detail Version:
I work in the Medical Records department of a hospital. In October, we go from traditional paper records to paperless/electronic. There's been a lot of confusion and uncertainty about it, because this changes the fundamental nature of the job (including going from being open 9-5 weekdays to being open 24/7, for one thing). Everyone's been running around like headless chickens since we started this project early last year.

More importantly, there's so far no way to tell if the new system is going to create new jobs or eliminate old jobs or what, so my boss has to be very, very careful who she hires and how to arrange hours and such.

ENTER THE ECONOMIC CRISIS:

Due to the new health care laws ("Obamacare" or whatever people are calling it), things changed for hospitals. I don't know the details, but I know that patients are now responsible for much less of the cost of hospital visits and stuff. Which means that the hospital is responsible for a lot MORE of the cost.

That's great if you're a patient, but the thing is that hospitals don't have any money, either! 8(

So we're on a shoestring budget. There are four actual employees in this department when there used to be more like fifteen. The gaps are filled in with volunteers who are out of high school for the summer and temps who always seem to quit after we've dumped a week's worth of time on training them. You can't run an office like this, but what can you do? There's just no money.

And even after all the cutting back, they're still in the red. And this is when it comes back to me: since I'm the only one in the department who isn't technically "full-time status," they cut my hours. Whenever the budget isn't where it should be, they just hack another day off of my work week. It's like printing money.

Of course, they've been working me full-time HOURS since January 2010, they just couldn't give me the status/benefits/security of being full-time STATUS. Which is lame by itself.

There isn't anything more I can do. I have six years of clerical experience, and I even have a BA. I've been applying for work all this time, an average of two jobs per day since 2009. I've had a few interviews, and some places even get back to me. But even though I'm really good at following up, none of these "opportunities" seem to be panning out.

I moved back in with my parents in December and already pay minimal rent. It was supposed to be a temporary thing, I was supposed to be saving up and moving out. I don't make enough to save anymore, so moving is right out until a miracle happens.

I applied for partial unemployment, but I do not have high hopes. And even if I get unemployment, that's another stress I don't want to deal with. Have you ever been on unemployment? They really put the screws to you and test your mettle! Can't I just have a job, please? ;_;

This has been a terrible couple of years. This job thing is just the most recent crisis. I'm stressed out and exhausted from having everything yanked out from under me one at a time, and from things just not working out despite how I'm doing everything I ought to be doing. Just because I'm doing better than some of my friends and I'm not on the street (yet) doesn't mean I'm doing alright. I'm about at the end of my rope.

So yeah. If I seem especially crabby these days, this is probably why. Sorry.

I'll never ask for charity, but if you'd like to help by buying my music from my bandcamp site, or commissioning me (I have a lot more time for drawing now!), I will love you forever.

In the meantime, I'm going to keep on keepin' on, applying for jobs right and left. What else is there?

My week off in July (which I was going to use to drive to Portland and FINALLY visit) just got canceled for mandatory training.

Which means: any time off I get in the remainder of 2011 will have to be in the next three weeks.

Soo... what are you guys up to the next three weeks? Can I crash some parties?

I have Thu-Sat off this week, so if need be, I could hop in the car first thing tomorrow morning. :F

Note me if you want my cell number.

So, my performance went well!

Well actually, it was kinda lame. I was performing for a store full of disinterested shoppers, mostly. That's okay, it's kind of what I expected.

Four friends came and made it really great. Thanks for coming, guys. :D

It got boring so we all started messing with the sound equipment and taking turns on the microphone doing cover versions and I dunno what else, it's not like anyone was paying attention anyway.

Then the guy came and shut us down early because he said the boss was coming. Kinda funny. We were done anyway.

I have great friends. It took my mind off of things for one night.

I've got a "gig!" (That's what they're called, right?)

I was at Rasputin with Phillip, and there was a sign saying, "submit your demos, we have live music here every week." I kind of only did it because he was doing it, half-serious, never really expecting to get picked. I only had half an idea what I'd do if I actually had to play live, because I don't have a band and I don't play any instruments or anything.

I'll be playing live at Rasputin Music in Campbell on Thursday at 6:00. Somehow. XD

It'll be karaoke style, because that's what I know how to do. It'll be like MJC Recital Hall again, only not!

I need something to do onstage. Since it's the Bay Area, I keep feeling obligated to make it into something weird or offensive and vaguely political. The idea of smearing my bare chest with anarchist messages in blue frosting was met with approval only because it got my shirt off...

SO YEAH

If you're in the Bay Area, you should totally come see me play! I'm pretty interesting.

I'll be doing a shorter set at Barefoot Coffee in Santa Clara the night before, 7:00-ish maybe (dunno what time slot I'll get until the day of). Just for practice. It would be cool if you wanted to see that one too, maybe.

That's the good news for this week, anyway. The BAD news can wait.

So anyway, I recently had an interview to be a game tester.

As part of the interview process, the lady in charge showed me five video clips from different games and had me spot the glitches. They were fairly obvious - walking through solid objects, sound not matching the action, etc.

But the third one... THE THIRD ONE....

It was a still image, and I... couldn't see anything wrong with it. Everything was spelled right and stuff. I even got to look at it more than once, but my answer was, "okay, I'm stumped."

She said, "four out of five, that's good!" so I guess that's good.

But my mind keeps going back to that still, flickery, cheesy-fake-aged-filter image... taunting me... HAUNTING ME...

What was the glitch? What WAS the glitch? My mind keeps revisiting and revisiting, maybe it was this, maybe it was that, the other four were so easy, I bet if I looked at it again I'd see it right away.... but I will NEVER KNOW.

4/5 was "good..." but not "great?!" Did I blow it? DID I BLOW MY ONE FINAL CHANCE AT HAPPINESS?? AGGH, that would be SO LIKE ME. I'm so stupid and worthless, I dress badly and I need a haircut, and my socks have holes in the weirdest places, and I need to lose weight and floss more often and etc etc etc I'M A LOATHSOME HUMAN BEING.

At some point I realize I've been rocking back and forth in the fetal position with my thumb in my mouth for two hours and I pick myself up and tell myself that's all silly. The interview was most likely pass/fail, and I passed. Yeah, they're not going to hire me, but not because I'm unqualified.

I did great. I'm awesome. Remember to breathe, everything's dandy~

....but WHAT was the FUCKING GLITCH?? 8[

*fetal position*

Because it hasn't yet.

D:

I hope Twitter starts working again soon, I have a lot of complaining to catch up on!

lol.

After nearly a year of waffling, here it is - ORPHEIC DRIVE, the full album. Check it out!

---> http://rabbitrabbit.bandcamp.com/al...../orpheic-drive

It's a $2 download, which ain't hardly nuthin', especially since I made everything else on my site free. ;3

About the album:

This album tells the story of a brilliant scientist who, driven mad by grief, constructed a machine to bring her daughter back from the land of the dead. This machine, the Orpheic Drive, unmakes the fabric of the universe upon activation, twisting the surrounding world into an unrecognizable nightmare world populated by vaguely-human beasts - leaving the scientist's poor young maid in the center of it all.

As the maid, you must venture through the evil world of the scientist's creation, and find that her past trauma is not so separate from your own...

This is a soundtrack for a conceptual survival horror game. Every sound in this album was fabricated from my own voice. The songs, ranging from "slightly creepy" to "downright terrifying," contain vaguely-human samples of unsimulated sobbing, laughter, and sex. Not something you should listen to with the lights turned out...

Paid download includes two hidden tracks, the original instrumental precursors to two of the final tracks.

I don't update like I used to.

Partially, it's because my internet addiction now seems to be satisfied by Twitter. But mostly, it's because I don't have anything new to update about. Just kind of the same old bitching about being stuck at my parents' house and generally missing out on life, because I can't find a new job.

I should be really grateful that I have a job at all, and I am. Doesn't change how I HATE my job, though. It was just supposed to pay for my school, and I'm all graduated now and ready to get a real job.

Except now all my friends have the dream jobs I want, and they don't have degrees or anything. Seven years and hundreds of thousands of dollars later, I'm not actually any better off for having an education. Thanks, life.

It's kinda too late now. I wanted to move to the Bay to be around my friends 'n stuff, but that was January. I've already missed all the parties and all the opportunities to get closer to them, and they're all moving away soon anyway.

My plan was, if I got to this desperate point, I would move to the South Bay anyway, and commute an hour to work every day. It would be expensive, but I'd be happier. Seems stupid now. Seeing as I'm having money issues, it would be dumb to put myself in that position when I have parents willing to help me out. And I've languished here in hell for THIS long, what's a few more years?

So yeah... if you ever think that you want to know what I'm up to lately, you really don't. It's just more whining.

Download my album when it comes out on the 14th~~