First Jace and now Dragoneer. This is just rotten.

I remember you, Sean. We talked about the challenges of finding work (and then we bent each others' ears about the shit that drove us crazy about our respective gigs). I remember you. We traded ideas back and forth for a series of dirty pictures neither of us ever got around to doing. The conceit was of a giraffe passenger on board a deep space cargo freighter--fresh out of college and taking the cheapest ticket off of her home world--who learns that her ship's captain and crew are far more entertaining and *ahem* accommodating of her curiosity and interests than she would have imagined possible.

It didn't happen. Life got in the way for both of us. We gradually drifted away from one another. It wasn't the result of any dispute or dislike. We were riding different tides. We kept up intermittent contact, but that was all either of us managed to do.

I kept in better contact with Jace, so his passing didn't catch me entirely unawares. I was able to offer him some distracting conversation and entertainment while he battled his way towards a better living situation. It almost came to pass...almost. And then he was gone. And now Dragoneer's followed him down the path to the clearing.

I remember you, Sean. I have many wishes to send in your direction: a wish that you're safe and content wherever you are now, that you;re free of the suffering that plagued you, and that the ones you loved are getting all the support they need to make it through their grief.

Wherever you are now, in whatever faraway place you're taking your rest, may you be surrounded with love and cradled in peace.

Hey there all you dear, sweet peeps. It's been an age since I've posted anything on FA (or anywhere else, for that matter). The past five years have been a steep climb for everyone and I've been struggling for the summit right beside you. I hope you're all doing well, that you're safe, that you've got some stability in your life and that you're loved.

My Sister-through-another-Mister, Cara Mitten--known as Ironfeathers here and Sassyparrot on Twitter--has been ill for some time and she's in the hospital right now, on the long, slow road to recovery. Her mother has made a page on a site called Caring Bridge, where you can read more about how she's doing and leave her support:

https://www.caringbridge.org/visit/.....tensnewchapter

Be aware that you'll need to use Google, your Apple ID or something like that in order to read her mother's updates and leave comments. You can always leave comments on her Twitter feed if you'd rather not join yet another service online.

Please go give her some love. I don't think many folks know she's been ill. She could use all y'all's egoboos.

Blessings upon all your sweet heads.

Hey, my dear floofs.

I had a great time at GP Las Vegas this past weekend. Met a metric buttload of kind and generous souls, including a pair of incredibly sweet furry souls, and it made me wonder how many furries are into Magic: the Gathering. Are there many Magic players in the fandom?

Things I've learned over the past decade:

Learning to love yourself takes time. Give it time.

When you need help, don't be afraid to ask for it.

You aren't a waste of space. You're not useless. You do possess good qualities. Let those good qualities be part of your self-image. You'll be amazed at how it changes you when you do.

It is not only possible to change yourself, it's totally worth the effort.

Being alone is okay. Being okay with being alone is okay. Loneliness sucks. You don't have to be alone.

You practice becoming the person you most want to be. It's an ongoing exercise in how to live. Don't look at it as a goal you'll meet some time down the line. Do what you can to be that person from one moment to the next. Pay attention to what you're doing right now.

Listening is way more important than talking.

Beauty is all around you. Try and find it. Try hardest when you're at your lowest. Beauty lifts you up.


So what do I want out of the dregs of this year and the one to come?

I want to see more of my friends.

I want to give back to the fandom that has given me so much.

I want to find out who Berb really is, and

I want to draw more porn.

There you have it. Break's over. *hugs*

Hey there, all you good peeps.

Things are...better. And it's feeling like the trend is continuing in this direction, for the first time in what feels like a million years.

I give you the Long Version of the following story for those who want it. I won't be hurt if you skip this for the Reader's Digest version.



Anyone who suffers from depression will tell you it puts your life in a blender. Your brain might as well be stuffed with cotton for all the good it does you. And my brain?

See, my brain and my heart have this ongoing spat. My heart wants me to do everything I can for everyone. I don't see this as a terrible trait when put in the context of a healthy mind/heart relationship, one that understands the importance of boundaries, self-worth, self-care, and most important for me, embracing imperfection as an integral part of being human. I enjoy helping people. Whether it's assisting a struggling artist with their work or helping a friend schlep boxes from one home to the next, it makes me feel like I'm useful, like I'm putting my desire to be a good person into practice.

But then my brain gets involved. I must plan things, you see. One just doesn't dive in willy-nilly, silly! One must first cry "Whoa, Nelly!", apply the brakes and then plan, plan, plan before you do anything. Yet the more I plan, the more complicated the act of doing becomes, until I am finally in a state of paralysis since I can't possibly do every single thing to the appropriate level of perfection.

As I once heard the great Terryl Whitlach say: "Perfection leads to Procrastination, which ends in Paralysis."

What changed?

I guess I did. I guess that's what I've been doing for the past nine years.

I set all the personal dials and meters back to zero. My instruments for self-measurement are way the fuck out of whack. How can you tell who you are or how you're doing without properly calibrated tools? Most folks learn how to fly straight from their parents. I've had to teach myself. When am I overreacting? When am I hurting someone by trying to help them, or making a bad situation worse? Where's the line between "yep, that's my fault" and "no, that's not my fault?" At what point am I making someone else's problem mine as well?

I've been practicing the art of witnessing myself--another way of saying I pushed "reset" on all my instruments. A typical arc of action I might have followed would go like "I did something/It didn't work out/Therefore I suck". I've been removing that last judgement from my internal analysis. What's been the result of this intentional edit of my internal dialog? I'm getting my "bounce" back, that's one thing. I'm more likely to learn from mistakes when I don't see every mistake as a personal failing. It's getting easier to spot opportunities and jump at the ones that interest me. It's getting easier to let go of those that don't, no matter who is pushing them under my nose nor how they try to entice/shame/manipulate me into doing what they want. I'm growing more capable of acting from a place of grace and kindness rather than fear, resentment, self-hate or shame. It's a weird state of living, attempting to stand apart from yourself in order to observe the ways in which you engage others and evaluate yourself, but it's done me huge good.

I have parts of me that I dig. That may sound loopy but I don't care. It's significant to me. The poisonous core of self-hate is the belief that you're unworthy of love. When you see that you've got the qualities your friends see in you, the things they love about you, you're stuck. The self-hate is dealt a crippling blow.

I started keeping a daily list of accomplishments. I made a point to include all of those things I normally dismissed as "givens". Hint: taking care of a friend in need? That's important. Very, very important. It counts. I've stopped guilt-tripping myself about forgetting to take out the garbage because I needed to talk a friend off the ledge.

I have a dog in my life again, a high-velocity Pibble mix who doesn't let me get away with any long, drawn-out moping. We walk at least once a day for an hour; usually two walks at an hour apiece. Hey, all those studies tying exercise to improved mental health are true! Whaddaya know. Depression turns me into a slug. My pup-girl is the best kind of slug prevention and what's more, she gives me love. It's hard to keep from smiling when she's staring up at me.

As for the perfectionism--the mindfucking that's held me back in so many ways--I'm letting it go in bits and pieces. I know what I want, and that's a wider role for the Furry side of me in my life. I'm not going to say what shape that will take, nor when. That only gets me in more trouble. I've said "I'm back!" before, haven't I? Let's just take it leisurely, shall we, and see what comes of it?

I've met some of the best people in the world thanks to this fandom. Love you, right down to your fuzz-covered tailbones. Be well. More soon.

Helly Hole! Or Holy Hell! All of a sudden I get a pile of Watchers! Welcome aboard, you fine peeps, thank you for giving me your consideration, and I hope you enjoy what I have to give. I'm a sporadic poster here on the FA machine.

Helly Hole! Or Holy Hell! All of a sudden I get a pile of Watchers! Welcome aboard, you fine peeps, thank you for giving me your consideration, and I hope you enjoy what I have to give. I'm a sporadic poster here on the FA machine.

Where have I been for the past few months? Good grief, good question, bad pun. Truth is I've been living the Blues since my pup-girl died. Her death hit me hard, harder than I wanted to admit; that's part of the reason for the quiet. Reason 02: work. Reason 03: procrastination. Reason 04: I wasn't going to post anything until I'd finished  slither's commission.

Got some stuff to say, now. First, I have joined the rest of humanity on Tumblr, and you can find me here:

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/sexandgesso

For the moment it's a repository for all the fun stuff I find on Tumblr, but I will begin posting art come December, and if you're on Tumblr, too, please come by and say hi. I'm behind the times! Help! Come update me!

Second, there are some projects on the horizon and when I can share concept art from 'em, I will, because they're furry and fun and I think you'll dig 'em.

Third, I plan on getting back to my Animation Backgrounds in the New Year, and offering a bunch of 'em as a big-ass art package, plus who knows what else, in the coming year. More on that as time permits.

I'll be raising my profile on Weasl and Inkbunny,too, in anticipation of Things To Come.

Lastly, but not leastly, I want to give everyone a giant hug for the recent explosion of Watching and Faving. Thank you, each and every one of you, for taking the time to come by this little corner of FA and giving it your appreciation. I'm thankful to have you.

Well, now, that's interesting. Apparently I've ended up on someone's Block list. He's someone I've never met, never even spoken with online. I saw a pic of his I liked and discovered I was Out, as Bill Burroughs would say. Wonder what happened.

..FANTASTIC. More fun than you could shake a stick at. So good it made me want to lie down and scream!

The fandom continues to evolve as it grows. What was big back in the Paleolithic (when I first joined "furrydom", as opposed to the second time) no longer carries much weight. There's much less interest in original art and more in fursuits; buttons and badges win over portfolios. There are more artists and the bar's been raised quite a few ticks since my Heady Early Days. Not a thing wrong with that.

I made new friends. I hung out with my Buds of Yore. I had a great time, caught the Con Crud, and lost the stylus to my Wacom Intuos 3. Did anybody notice a stray Wacom pen? Would you be willing to get it to me in return for a reward?

That was the only bummer to the whole deal. To my friends, new and old, I cannot wait to see you again at RF next year, if not sooner!

Stolen from  eryshefalafel


1: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette? Easily. Watch me. You can throw cigars in there, too.

2: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused? I'm complicated.

3: What if I told you that you were pretty? Well, I feel pretty. Does that count? Would you expect me to be oh so pretty, and witty, and gay? Because I'm not sure I could fulfill all those demands at this time. You may need to call back later.

4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”? *sigh* Yes.

5: Are you interested in anyone right now? Why, are you on the hunt?

6: What are you looking forward to in the next week? Painting my backside off.

7: Do you want to be single? No, I do not, though having been single for a decade may suggest otherwise to some.

8: Did you go out or stay in last night? Last night was a work night; the Doctor was In.

9: How late did you stay up last night? Right 'round midnight.

10: Can you recall the last time you realized you liked someone a lot? Yep.

11: Last three things you had to drink? Charles Shaw Merlot, Black Butte Porter on Nitro, Troll Porter.

12: Have you ever pretended to like someone? No. I was raised in the Continental style. I've found people often confuse being handled with manners and common courtesy as being liked. This is fine with me.

13: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it? Only once. Once was enough.

14: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months? Yes, but they're getting good treatment at a local psychiatric ward and are expected to achieve a full recovery by Christmas.

15: Is it hard for you to get over someone? It varies. My last love affair was pure hell to get over.

16: Think back five months ago, were you single? *raises right hand* Yes, your honor.

17: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon? I'll think about telling you when I get there.

18: Hold hands with anyone this week? Nope.

19: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol? Probably.

20: What would you name your future daughter? Rochester. Or perhaps Super-Elephant Mango-Spanner is better. What do you think?

21: Do you miss anyone? Yes. Very much.

22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night? I've come close.

23: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed? Yep. So did my last @#(*#! and my last $$*%&#(*!!

24: Are you good at hiding your feelings? Isn't that relative? I'd say yes, but I know folks who can read me like a book.

25: Have you ever cried from being so mad? Oh, yeah, I have. It beats the alternative.

26: Who did you last see in person? My best bud-brudda like no utha,  chromatophore.

27: Are you listening to music right now? Nope. Hit the Pause button so I could finish this rubbish.

28: What is something you currently want right now? A shiny new computer.

29: What is the last thing you said out loud? "Oh, for FUCK'S SAKE--"

30: How is your heart lately? Exactly where the fucker ought to be.

31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie? Rarely. I'm ancient, remember?

32: Are you wearing socks? I am wearing feet. They are presently attached to my legbones. This condition will hopefully continue for a very long time.

33: What do people call you? Unka Berbie, Berbs, Berbles, Berbaboo, Brudda by a few, Professor by more than a few, MISTER and SIR when certain folks make me grumpy. You know who you are. GET BACK TO WORK RIGHT NOW, YOUNG'N'S, SCHOOL IS A LONG WAY FROM OVER.

34: Will you talk to the person you like tonight? Yes, I do believe I will!

35: Are there any stressful situations in your life? Does the Pope shit in the woods?

36: Who did you last share a bed with? Someone beautiful.

37: Did you do something bad today? It's still early. Give me time.

38: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you? You mean in the full-body, I'm-this-close-because-I-want-to-be sort of way? Back in June.

39: Do you get stressed out easily? Depends on where the stress is coming from. I have my Kryptonite, just like anybody else.

40: Will you sing today? Already have! Fortunately nobody heard.

41: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t? Yep. Guilty as charged.

42: Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone? I gots a few sweet good folks in my corner. Bless every hair on their heads.

43: Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance? Nyet. I've either walked or been driven there. I suppose there's always a first time, yes?

44: What are you listening to right now? OSI.

45: What is wrong with you right now? Too fat, too out-of-shape, too friendly with old bad habits.

46: What is on your wrists right now? Hair.

47: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wearing? 'twas given to me by the dude who painted the picture it bears, about fifteen years ago.

48: What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider? Yesh. It all depends on my mood.

49: Do you make wishes at 11:11? Nn:oo. Is this another one of those youngster things?

50: Are you a good artist? *checks resume* Close enough for Government work, babe.

51: Love really is a beautiful thing huh? It's the weld that binds the world together.

52: Do you miss the way things were six months ago? Nope. I'll consider the past but my snout is aimed forward.

53: Ever been on a golf cart? Not while sober.

54: Do you have trust issues? I'm no longer very patient with those who break trust with me. It's part of that getting old stuff.

55: Ever stayed up all night on the phone? Yes I most certainly have.

56: Do you own something from Hot Topic? Fuck no. I'm ancient. Ancients don't that newfangled shit.

57: Do you use chap stick? Carmex is superior in all ways.

58: Have you ever slapped someone in the face? Slapped, no. Punched, yes.

59: Do you have a little sister? Yes I do, and her name is  ironfeathers, and I love her very much.

60: Have you ever been to New York? Once. Once is not enough.

61: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it? I know she did.

62: Have you hugged someone within the last week? Yep.

63: What were you doing at midnight last night? Turning off the light after pulling my snout out of The Player of Games by Iain Banks.

64: Have you ever regretted kissing someone? I don't think kisses are so much a thing to regret as the assumptions that can follow them. Regrets I can confess to having in the aftermath of a kiss.

65: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile? Once upon a time. I had to say goodbye to her this past May.

66: Were your last three kisses from the same person? Oh, yeah.

67: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days? Not in the context of this list, no.

68: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone? I sleep much better with a cuddle partner.

69: Will next Friday be a good one? Yes it will, despite it being Friday the 13th (Yikes!!).

Peanuts? Yeah, I thought Charles Shultz was pretty cool when I was a kid. Snoopy was my gateway to the world of warplanes. I was more influenced by my dad's old collection of Pogo comics. Walt Kelly could draw, man, and design and do calligraphy by hand.

Bill Watterson's technical skill and storytelling acumen affected me in the same way, years later, when he came out with Calvin & Hobbes. Yeah, it was funny as hell but goddamn was it well-drawn. His work and that of Berkeley Breathed's Bloom County were high-water marks from the 80s newspaper strips.

Watterson impressed me as a person, the more I learned about him. The following link will take you to a little comic that was done in honor of a commencement speech he gave at his alma mater a few years ago. For all of you chasing your own dreams out there in Furrydom and elsewhere, here comes some fuel. Read it. Drink it up. Then go make that dream real.

http://zenpencils.com/comic/128-bil.....onists-advice/

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11400309/

I'm not much of a gamer, and honestly Zelda didn't win my heart, which is all the more reason for you to listen to me when I say I would SO JUMP AT THIS opportunity to win some of Rotarr's art. If fact I am going to, soon as I'm finished writing this, and YOU should, too!

Rotarr is one of those folks I hope to see when I check FA's submissions every morning. I knew from the moment I saw her fly 'sona, years ago, that I'd found an artist close to my heart. Check her out!!

You aren't.

http://www.cyclonelife.net/2013/07/.....stor-syndrome/

Feeling worthless took practice. I'm not being sarcastic or dismissive or glib, I'm completely serious here. It's a voice inside that got strong over time. Practice reversing the message. Believe in yourself. That's not being arrogant, or selfish. That's what confidence is: belief, plain and simple.

I don't mean me, except for the first part: I am not "over" Ellie's loss by any means, nor is it something I think is particularly laudable. Why should you "get over" the loss of someone dear to you? Acceptance comes with time and that's what I'm feeling. I'll always miss her but I have her paw print in clay right in front of me. She's still in me, still held dear. I'm feeling functional again. And a good thing, too, considering how much has accumulated during my absence. Arghle Bargle.

But soft, and onward to the farts! I want to bring to your attention this particular little Kickstarter toot what's called Animal Gas. It's poetry in farts, or pootetry, if you will, done by the Most Strange and Humorous Artist, Bryan Ballinger:

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects.....f-picture-book

Yes, you read that right. A scratch-and-sniff-poetry-book-about-animals-and-their-self-delusions. And their farts.

It's funny, it's beautiful, and it deserves your support. It ain't sweet--but you knew that when you entered the room. :D

Help spread the joy! Go, my furry brethren, and break like the wind!

Today I get to put my Dog-Daughter down.

Fuck you, Saturday. No, seriously: FUCK YOU.

Edit: she's gone. Goodbye to you, my baby girl, my centenarian pup. Thank you for sharing your life with me.

I feel hollowed out.

Today I get to put my Dog-Daughter down.

Fuck you, Saturday. No, seriously: FUCK YOU.

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects.....-illustrated-s

Sorry folks--link is fixed.

Pat Ann Lewis is a brilliant kid's-book illustrator. She's like a blend of Beatrix Potter, Wallace Tripp and Arthur Rackham with some Detmold thrown in for good measure. And here she is doing a book about anthro animal adventures, a la The Wind in the Willows!!

This is going to be a stunner of a book. Go! Toss 'em some cash!

"And the Lord of Hosts spoke unto Gilbert, and said unto him "Let there be a grand celebration of cooked meat items and little bits of green vegetables with slivered nuts mixed in, and of stuffing made of leavened bread thou; also round pastries of a pie kind made from the Kin of Pump, and verily shall ye sluice thy foodings down thy gullets with spiced apple cider, and wine, and beer, and milk, and kittens, and Boston, even unto the fifth generation by the corner lot on the corner of Denny and Ass Gasket; puke where ye stand, yea even unto the purse of your most hated in-law, and make unto thyself a foolishness not to be lived down for at least a sixmonth; this shall be a good thing in Mine eyes and I shall bless it, and stuff."

Have a wonderful holiday, sweet, dear peeps. Eat, drink, be merry and give thanks for all the good things you have in your lives. Hell, that part's worth doing every day

Wuv,

Berbs

I had a BLAST. A full-tilt, ass-kicking, brain-tickling, alcohol-infused spectacular of a 'con, thank you very much. I got to meet old friends again and hang out with new-found peoples of awesomeness. I spent an entire con in wonderful company. I am, capital-A AM hitting this 'con again next year, and I'm going to see about hitting a couple more while I'm planning 2013.

Furrydom has changed in many ways since I took to the fandom in 1992. Twenty years. Hell, it's been sixteen years since I came up with his Berbness; I was all ready to rock that boy and BAM, my career took fandom out of the picture for more than a decade. I wanted what my work could give me. Fandom felt too restricting at the time. Rainfurrest is the first furry 'con I've hit since '96. Wow. So many changes and all for the better. The fandom is far more diverse now by every conceivable standard of measurement.

Notable differences were on display the moment  chromatophore and I walked into the hotel lobby. Fursuiters were everywhere. Fantastical creatures were striding all over the place. I haven't seen anything remotely kin to such a sight outside of Dragon Con. It only got more amazing as the 'con went on. Ears and tails are fine, but full suits? That takes dedication. And it was the Fursuiters who gave me the most memorable sight of the entire event.

It was after Friday night's dinner. We'd entered the lobby around the time a large group of middle-aged, regular-normal-types were on their way home from some soirre, the women dressed to the nines, most of their dates looking like they'd stumbled off an Eddie Bauer photo shoot. Two Fursuiters, a pair of dog-types, were playing around the central table. The punch line is where I get to sound OLD here. Bear with me. In them days, before the fandom was so big (and before the invention of the wheel, shoes and cheese), the fandom-folks and their normal kin didn't mix so very well. I was all prepared to see smirks and hear jibes from the diners leaving the Hilton as they were forced to pass through this exotic crowd. Instead--and this happened so quickly, so easily, you'd think such confluences of subcultures happen every day--for the next twenty minutes the women took turns posing with the canid-ians. Then the men got their turn. The 'suiters went on their way, their good deed done, and the diners spent another five minutes or more laughing while they looked at each other's photos. Not a snide remark to be heard.

I was inside the circle of some ordinary magic. People of entirely separate worlds laughed and goofed like children for a half-hour or more, all because of two people in fuzzy outfits. I think that's pretty goddamn cool. I could go on and on about all the things that excite me, the dramatic impact women are having on the art scene, the wild clothing, the music, but I won't. Two dudes in doggie drag, playing with a gaggle of middle-aged jet-setters smack in the middle of a hotel lobby--that's going to be with me as long as the little grey cells can keep bouncing about in my thick skull.

Shout-outs to  skadjer,  syrinoth,  electric-talia,  tryst-entangled and her boy Austin, for giving me many hours of fine company. I finally got to meet Peggy after a whole summer of aborted attempts and that was completely smashing. It led to a dinner with  ladyfoxglove,  dingbat,  skulldog and the super-talented Rah-Bop (not sure if she's on FA or not, but it was a hoot finally meeting someone Vantid's raved about for so long).  vantid hugtackled me in the dealer's room. Love you too, sweetbean, and I've missed you fierce.  turbinedivinity gave me beer and ranted politics with me until the wee hours, introducing me to his very cool friend Aaron and to  oCe, someone I've wanted to meet for a million years (since days of Yerf and before), and her boy Josh? Man I hope I got the name right but I remember faces first. I'll have to buy him a beer if I fucked that up.

I got to meet  onnanoko at long last!! She gave me a great big hug and showed me a WIP of a badge that had me grinning like a fox in a chicken coop. What a dearheart. I swear I will find a way to be worthy of such a gift! I also got to meet the incredible, unsinkable  mitti and damn if I didn't get spoiled with another huge hug. Meeting  sigil was another pleasure. Jesus Christ, spontaneous hug number three!

My buddy  chromatophore and I were united again under a convention's roof. Just like old times, except with aching backs and the notably strange sensation that we were old enough to be parents to half the 'con's attendees. I wouldn't have it any other way, my friend. Thank you for your company and most of all, your friendship. Big thanks to Gene Breshears of the Tai-Pan Project for making Rainfurrest an option for us in the first place. Our little corner of the Dealer's Den was so chill everyone around us were in parkas.

Sleep sweet, you peeps.

I will be holding down one end of  Chromatophore's table with a laptop and a big fat Mac monitor. You should be coming by our table is because he's the man behind Tombstone Jig and the maker of truly wonderful sketchbooks! I do mean wonderful. I love mine to death. I'm there to provide a little visual distraction. My plan is to spend the weekend painting and I'd like a hand deciding what, exactly, I ought to paint.

1. Berb's Backgrounds
This will be my default, I suspect, since I love doing 'em and I've got a ton at the halfway mark.

2. A Critter a Day
One full-on rendered critter a day. Again, I've got a pile of starts I could finish, but I could also ask you all for suggestions and work from them.

3. A Daily Contest
I'd make a journal for each of the three days I'll be on-site (ahead of the con, natch) and the first person to post in the journal would get a painting of their character.

4. Crit, Crit, Crit
I love teaching. It's truly the best thing I've done with my professional life. Nothing as felt as rewarding. Artists attending the con who'd like a crit could email me a piece they're struggling with and I'd give 'em up to an hour of art-gab time.

What do you folks think? Would any of these options catch your fancy? If you had the chance to tell me what to paint for the convention, what would you want me to do?

Final note: if the computer option just won't work I will be spending the day demoing on  Chromatophore's sketch pads. I'll do some demoing anyway if he wants me to.

Four months after it began, our little Family Drama has reached a conclusion; not the end of the book, necessarily, but something we can live with until the next chapter starts.

I won't burden you with the gory details. We didn't get everything we needed to bring about true closure. On the other hand, the family member who was out to burn down everything in his path got virtually none of his wishes granted. Mom is still alive, so am I, and he's screwed himself so thoroughly it will be years before he gets back on his feet.

If you need meds to live a healthy, normal life, for fuck's sake stay on them. There's a limit to what you get to ask of your family. There has to be, otherwise everybody will end up destroyed by your madness. Take ownership of who you are. Don't let your weaknesses rule you. Surrender to your demons and you'll lose everything that matters to you. Each time you choose sickness over health the world awaiting you on the far side of catastrophe will be that much smaller until one day you'll wake up with nothing. And you'll deserve every goddamn iota.

It will take time to ramp back up to full throttle but I'm cool with that. I get to resume my life. Move aside, survival. it's time to thrive again.

Be well, all you sweet peeps.

Hello, hello fine peoples.

First: thank you, all my new Watching-type folks, I appreciate every Watch I get!

Second: a big thank-you for all the recent faves and kind comments left on my work. I have not been able to answer folks as promptly as I would like. I appreciate you taking the time to say your words of gracious support, crits and questions. It means a very great big lot to me.

Third: I have been absent here for a couple months and it is unfortunately likely I will continue to be absent for some unknown amount of time. This time it's not by choice; I'm not juggling clients or grading schoolwork.

I am helping my Mom through a profoundly ugly chapter of Family Drama. Most Family Dramas rarely come out of "nowhere". This one is no different but the scale and intensity of the thing is hard to encompass from the middle of the shitstorm. It's the sort of experience the effects of which make themselves known over months and years.

So I'm where I need to be in this crisis: next to Mom, doing whatever needs to be done.

I am lucky to have the Mom I have, lucky to have the friends I have, lucky to have my brave nonagenarian pup, lucky to be alive. I am bound and determined to be back as soon as I can. I've got backgrounds to complete and projects to share and some art I owe to some very good and patient friends.

Thanks for sticking around. You're good eggs.

Berbie's Background Bonanza, Round Two, is complete! And a big Berbian thank youz to all those who wanted to play with this'n!

My plan is to send a link to everyone on my BBB list with each new completed file. If at any time you want off the list, just mail me back with "remove" in the body text and I'll do so. Should you be interested in joining the fun, PM me with your email address and you will be included in the next round!

May this week be most excellent for you!

*hugs*

Hello one and all!

Last year I set myself the goal of making a bunch of animation-quality backgrounds. Disney-level quality was my target. Would I hit that mark? Might as well take a swing at it. The exercise would be good for me. Then I had an idea. I figured I'd plug my own characters into these settings eventually. Why not make them available to fellow artists in the meantime?

This year, starting now, I am putting my plan into action. The second Collaborative Background has just been plugged into my gallery. I'll announce every new piece of shareable art as it arrives. Berbie's Background Bonanza begins now!

Here's how it works. If you'd like to be part of the mailing list, PM me your email addy. When I upload the file to Sendspace, every person on the list will get the full-size PS file to play with. All that I ask in return is that you give me credit and a link once you post your piece. I mean it when I call this collaboration; you can tinker with the background as much as you like or not at all. Each image will provide at least two or three possible loci for characters to be placed.

That's that. Thank you for watching, for commenting, faving, and joining in the madness!