"You Still Buy" a parody of "Still Alive"
Posted 4 years ago"You Still Buy" by BlitzWolf69
~Parody of "Still Alive" from Portal
Look at our Triumphs.
And what of our Seals? Now that's content.
It's hard to ever make
The game feel balanced.
Bungie or 'Vision?
Can you even tell
the difference?
For the good of all players,
Except the ones who have left.
Now we hear you screaming about all our mistakes.
We just keep on patching beyond what you can take.
And the nerfing gets done, now you hate that neat gun.
But you people, we know, will still buy!
You say that you're angry.
We swear we hear, you all, right now.
So we're taking out, again,
Telesto.
And improving drop rates
On all the exotics left in Raids.
Now they'll shoot up by a whole
One percent every week.
Now, we test our data.
What a beautiful lie.
It's just like the beta
Only price is too high.
It's your wallets we burn
Yet you never seem to learn.
And you people, we know, will
Still buy.
Go on and leave us.
We're sure that you won't return again.
Maybe you'll find other games to play, too.
What about "Anthem?"
That was a joke. Ha ha.
Fat chance.
Anyway Tess has new stock,
So many emotes! Your choice.
Look at us still selling
Every update to you.
When we look online
No criticism to view.
Get a shader for your gun
Buy more styles! Now that's fun.
'Cause you people, we know, will
Still buy.
While we are laughing, we know, you
Still buy.
Though we aren't changing, we know, you
Still buy.
Content gets vaulted, we know, you
Still buy.
And while we don't care, we know, you
Still buy.
Re-skinned nostalgia, we know, you
Still buy.
You still buy.
Yes, you buy.
~Parody of "Still Alive" from Portal
Look at our Triumphs.
And what of our Seals? Now that's content.
It's hard to ever make
The game feel balanced.
Bungie or 'Vision?
Can you even tell
the difference?
For the good of all players,
Except the ones who have left.
Now we hear you screaming about all our mistakes.
We just keep on patching beyond what you can take.
And the nerfing gets done, now you hate that neat gun.
But you people, we know, will still buy!
You say that you're angry.
We swear we hear, you all, right now.
So we're taking out, again,
Telesto.
And improving drop rates
On all the exotics left in Raids.
Now they'll shoot up by a whole
One percent every week.
Now, we test our data.
What a beautiful lie.
It's just like the beta
Only price is too high.
It's your wallets we burn
Yet you never seem to learn.
And you people, we know, will
Still buy.
Go on and leave us.
We're sure that you won't return again.
Maybe you'll find other games to play, too.
What about "Anthem?"
That was a joke. Ha ha.
Fat chance.
Anyway Tess has new stock,
So many emotes! Your choice.
Look at us still selling
Every update to you.
When we look online
No criticism to view.
Get a shader for your gun
Buy more styles! Now that's fun.
'Cause you people, we know, will
Still buy.
While we are laughing, we know, you
Still buy.
Though we aren't changing, we know, you
Still buy.
Content gets vaulted, we know, you
Still buy.
And while we don't care, we know, you
Still buy.
Re-skinned nostalgia, we know, you
Still buy.
You still buy.
Yes, you buy.
#MarvelFansUnited & Why I Don't Care About Captain Marvel
Posted 6 years agohttps://twitter.com/BlitzWolf69/sta.....81487050711041
I just went on a long Twitter rant about this video I watched under the #MarvelFansUnited thing. It's a couple of guys going on about how everyone should go see this movie to support women and all kinds of misguided, even if with good intent, agenda shit. Then it just came spilling out of me. Have a read, if you want. Or don't. It's whatever.
I just went on a long Twitter rant about this video I watched under the #MarvelFansUnited thing. It's a couple of guys going on about how everyone should go see this movie to support women and all kinds of misguided, even if with good intent, agenda shit. Then it just came spilling out of me. Have a read, if you want. Or don't. It's whatever.
Merry Christmas, Everyone!
Posted 6 years agoJust as the title says. As the day winds down to a close, I just wanted to take a moment to say that I hope everyone who celebrates had a wonderful day. You know what? Even if you don't celebrate this holiday, I hope you had a great day.
Merry Christmas. Happy holidays. And all the various greetings of the season. Much love, everyone.
Merry Christmas. Happy holidays. And all the various greetings of the season. Much love, everyone.
I Might Be Leaving.
Posted 7 years agoI am currently giving strong consideration to closing this chapter of my life.
Friends I once held very close have drifted away. Those I loved have cast me aside.
I have lots of great memories within this fandom and community but the awful memories are becoming far more prominent. It's getting harder and harder to ignore the idea that I could have saved myself a lot of time and heartache had I just not been here when they first arrived.
To anyone who would read this and actually give a shit, there's not really anything you could do or say to sway me one way or the other. It's a decision I will come to on my own. It would be a very hard decision because if I do decide to walk away from the furry part of my life then, quite frankly, it would be forever. I couldn't look back or come back. I'd only dig into old wounds. I'd probably just end up getting hurt again and again by those I get too close to that I can't be with.
You've probably already noticed that the bulk of what used to make-up my front page is gone. No matter what, none of that is coming back. If I stay then I'm staying on my terms and starting over as I see fit to. Which will probably result in me telling a select few to fuck-off and stay away from me. We'll see..
If you read this, great. If not, I'm not exactly shocked. Yeah, this is in my profile info, too. Deal with it.
Friends I once held very close have drifted away. Those I loved have cast me aside.
I have lots of great memories within this fandom and community but the awful memories are becoming far more prominent. It's getting harder and harder to ignore the idea that I could have saved myself a lot of time and heartache had I just not been here when they first arrived.
To anyone who would read this and actually give a shit, there's not really anything you could do or say to sway me one way or the other. It's a decision I will come to on my own. It would be a very hard decision because if I do decide to walk away from the furry part of my life then, quite frankly, it would be forever. I couldn't look back or come back. I'd only dig into old wounds. I'd probably just end up getting hurt again and again by those I get too close to that I can't be with.
You've probably already noticed that the bulk of what used to make-up my front page is gone. No matter what, none of that is coming back. If I stay then I'm staying on my terms and starting over as I see fit to. Which will probably result in me telling a select few to fuck-off and stay away from me. We'll see..
If you read this, great. If not, I'm not exactly shocked. Yeah, this is in my profile info, too. Deal with it.
Happy 4th! Plus, AnthroCon Bound!
Posted 7 years agoJust wishing everyone a very happy 4th here in the States.
Tomorrow, I'll be hitting the road and driving on up to Pittsburgh for another AnthroCon. Genuinely excited for this one. Nothing in particular, really. We gotta good hotel right in the middle of where everything is. I won't have such a tight budget this time around as I finally got full-time paychecks coming. I can just genuinely enjoy this trip and relax without walking blocks to get where I wanna go or worrying about how much I'm spending.
Can't wait to see as many of you there as I possibly can!
Tomorrow, I'll be hitting the road and driving on up to Pittsburgh for another AnthroCon. Genuinely excited for this one. Nothing in particular, really. We gotta good hotel right in the middle of where everything is. I won't have such a tight budget this time around as I finally got full-time paychecks coming. I can just genuinely enjoy this trip and relax without walking blocks to get where I wanna go or worrying about how much I'm spending.
Can't wait to see as many of you there as I possibly can!
I Am On PS4, Now! Add Me!
Posted 7 years agoFor those of you whom I played with on Xbox only to have moved to Playstation or for those that have wanted to add me on Playstation...
Now's your chance. Heh.. I recently got a PS4 from a friend of mine who didn't want or need his anymore because he gotta Pro. So he gave me his. I currently do not have any games on it nor do I have PS Plus because I cannot afford to get it at the moment. However, in the coming time, I will add to my library and maybe get Plus; perhaps someone will gift me a membership or I may get some extra cash. Who knows?
Anyways, feel free to add me if you'd like to. My PSN is BlitzWolf69. Same as it is on Xbox. Because, you know, I'm so damn original.
Now's your chance. Heh.. I recently got a PS4 from a friend of mine who didn't want or need his anymore because he gotta Pro. So he gave me his. I currently do not have any games on it nor do I have PS Plus because I cannot afford to get it at the moment. However, in the coming time, I will add to my library and maybe get Plus; perhaps someone will gift me a membership or I may get some extra cash. Who knows?
Anyways, feel free to add me if you'd like to. My PSN is BlitzWolf69. Same as it is on Xbox. Because, you know, I'm so damn original.
Xbox One: Far Cry 5 Part 1
Posted 7 years agoGoing live in just about 10 minutes! Come join me. I'll be fuckin' drunk!
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
Sea of Thieves - Avoid it Like Scurvy
Posted 7 years agoThis game....is awful. A joke with a bad punchline. It's honestly offensive that it carries a $60 price tag.
If you own it, I'm so sorry. I hope you get some measure of joy out of it but you know, as well as I do, that it has no content beyond repeating fetch quests.
The map to explore is incredibly small. Every island is pretty much the same. There's no real progression to this game because all the weapons and gear you can purchase are 100% cosmetic. Nothing boosts damage or armor or speed or anything. It's all just for looks.
There is nothing here. It actually has less content than Destiny 2. It's disgusting and disgraceful that this game, which has been in development for so long, ships at a full $60 with nothing to show for it. If you played the BETA, you pretty much played the entire game.
And the fucking trolls! Holy fuck, there needs to be a non-PVP server to this game. Assholes just shoot you, sink your ship, and all around ruin your experience for nothing gained beyond being trolls. And there's even a note in the taverns, where you always start when loading in, that tell players to keep it on the seas. You think that would mean they can't attack at the outposts but, guess what? They can, will and do. So what's the point of that? There's no option to report players for doing crap like that. It's just a joke...with a bad punchline.
I cannot, in any way, shape or form, recommend this game in its current state. It's like it's still in BETA but you shelled-out $60 to try it this time. They need a lot of content updates and every last one of them had better be free. To charge that much money for the same fetch quests, and nothing else, every piece of content to come had better be free updates to the game. New factions. New maps. Actual quests. New enemies. As it is, this game is fucking awful.
DO. NOT. BUY.
If you own it, I'm so sorry. I hope you get some measure of joy out of it but you know, as well as I do, that it has no content beyond repeating fetch quests.
The map to explore is incredibly small. Every island is pretty much the same. There's no real progression to this game because all the weapons and gear you can purchase are 100% cosmetic. Nothing boosts damage or armor or speed or anything. It's all just for looks.
There is nothing here. It actually has less content than Destiny 2. It's disgusting and disgraceful that this game, which has been in development for so long, ships at a full $60 with nothing to show for it. If you played the BETA, you pretty much played the entire game.
And the fucking trolls! Holy fuck, there needs to be a non-PVP server to this game. Assholes just shoot you, sink your ship, and all around ruin your experience for nothing gained beyond being trolls. And there's even a note in the taverns, where you always start when loading in, that tell players to keep it on the seas. You think that would mean they can't attack at the outposts but, guess what? They can, will and do. So what's the point of that? There's no option to report players for doing crap like that. It's just a joke...with a bad punchline.
I cannot, in any way, shape or form, recommend this game in its current state. It's like it's still in BETA but you shelled-out $60 to try it this time. They need a lot of content updates and every last one of them had better be free. To charge that much money for the same fetch quests, and nothing else, every piece of content to come had better be free updates to the game. New factions. New maps. Actual quests. New enemies. As it is, this game is fucking awful.
DO. NOT. BUY.
Happy New Year! - 2018 Edition
Posted 7 years agoExactly that. Happy new year, everyone. Hopefully we all get a better 2018 than 2017.
Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays
Posted 7 years agoNothing big. Just wanted to wish everyone a very merry Christmas and a happy holidays, no matter what you celebrate.
Sending all the warm, fuzzy feelings I can to everyone. Much love.
Sending all the warm, fuzzy feelings I can to everyone. Much love.
Curse of Osiris Part 1 Going LIVE!
Posted 8 years agohttps://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
What can the guy from "The Mummy" teach us? Nothing, apparently.
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
What can the guy from "The Mummy" teach us? Nothing, apparently.
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
BLACK FRIDAY FOR NAZIS | Wolfenstein The New Order Part 3
Posted 8 years agohttps://www.twitch.tv/blitzwolf69
Going live. Slaying all kinds of annoying holiday shoppers. .... I mean Nazis.
https://www.twitch.tv/blitzwolf69
Going live. Slaying all kinds of annoying holiday shoppers. .... I mean Nazis.
https://www.twitch.tv/blitzwolf69
Happy Thanksgiving
Posted 8 years agoJust wanted to wish everyone celebrating a Thanksgiving of any kind to have a happy one. Friends, family or even if you're just taking the day off to chill by yourself. It doesn't matter what you're doing or how you're celebrating or even if you are in the first place.
Have a great day, everyone. Much love to my extended fam.
Have a great day, everyone. Much love to my extended fam.
WHAT SCARES YOU MOST? | Batman: Arkham Knight (Finale)
Posted 8 years agoIf I know what scares people, it's having to listen to me sing...poorly! Mwahahahaha! No, seriously, I do. Watch it.
PRETTY SURE IT'S STILL HALO | Destiny 2 Part 5 (LIVE)
Posted 8 years agohttps://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
The big dude looks like a Grunt, for fuck's sake!
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
The big dude looks like a Grunt, for fuck's sake!
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
BLOW YOUR LOAD | Destiny 2 Part 4 (Video)
Posted 8 years agoWhat else would you call a Novabomb?
BLOW YOUR LOAD | Destiny 2 LIVE Now!
Posted 8 years agohttps://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
What else do you call a Novabomb?
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
What else do you call a Novabomb?
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
My Little Pony: Everyone Loses Their Minds!
Posted 8 years agoThe puns! Do you get them?! Do you?!
If you don't get the joke, I pity you. Or me. I'm gonna pity someone around here!
ACHIEVEMENT FARMING 5 | Skyrim (Video)
Posted 8 years agoHail, Sithis!
Live-Streaming More Achievements!
Posted 8 years agohttps://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
Pretty much finishing Skyrim. Come join me.
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
Pretty much finishing Skyrim. Come join me.
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
Rest in Peace - Bobby Heenan
Posted 8 years agoThat came as a hard blow. He was one of the greatest personalities in pro-wrestling ever.
Manager.
Commentator.
Performer.
Weasel.
Heel.
The Brain.
Amazing.
At the very least, Gorilla Monsoon and The Brain are together again. RIP Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. You'll be missed.
Manager.
Commentator.
Performer.
Weasel.
Heel.
The Brain.
Amazing.
At the very least, Gorilla Monsoon and The Brain are together again. RIP Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. You'll be missed.
I CAN'T EVEN... | WTF: Just Cause 3
Posted 8 years agoThis one will make you dizzy!
BoJack Horseman: Season 4 (No Spoilers...per say..)
Posted 8 years agoAll I'm going to say about this latest season is that it might be the best yet.
It had some hiccups but no season has been perfect. Really, it's the build to the end. The last 3-4 episodes, in particular, are absolutely stellar. Powerful. Emotional. Funny. Depressing. Just...incredible.
I won't tell what the major arch of this season is. It's so good. Such a "holy shit" feeling when the big reveal happens. They did a superb job with this season.
The only thing I will say, though, is that I was basically crying at the finale. He got a happy ending, finally.
It had some hiccups but no season has been perfect. Really, it's the build to the end. The last 3-4 episodes, in particular, are absolutely stellar. Powerful. Emotional. Funny. Depressing. Just...incredible.
I won't tell what the major arch of this season is. It's so good. Such a "holy shit" feeling when the big reveal happens. They did a superb job with this season.
The only thing I will say, though, is that I was basically crying at the finale. He got a happy ending, finally.
NEVER STOP FIGHTING | Destiny 2 Part 3 (Vid)
Posted 8 years agoBEYOND THE DARKNESS | Destiny 2 Live-Stream Part 2
Posted 8 years agohttps://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
LIVE! Come join me, Guardians. I'll even teach you how to get Scouting Commander!
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live
LIVE! Come join me, Guardians. I'll even teach you how to get Scouting Commander!
https://gaming.youtube.com/c/BlitzPlay/live