I AM ON HIATUS FROM THIS SITE UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.
If you need to get a hold of me, please try one of the links above and sorry for the inconvenience!

HI GUYS REMEMBER ME? NO? WELL TOO BAD.

I'm back and better than ever with a fresh, lemon-squeezed scent, only not really, so you'll just have to imagine that last part until they develop smell-o-vision. Anyways I hope you guys don't mind, but I'm gonna be uploading [s]some a lot of my art here!

PS- mwah mwah mwah.
PSS- I got a 3DS and my friend code is: 0559-7056-2413 ADD ME (( I am Atari ))!!!

It's 2012 and HEY I'M STILL ALIVE.

First thing's first, I'm back in northern California right now with  kilometers and  ke and we're going to FC! Thanks to  astolpho, I even have a panel where I'll be drawing and talking on Sunday, so be on the lookout for that! I hope to see and meet some of you there. I CAN'T WAIT.

And now onto the other stuff. It's been a long time since my last journal, and a LOT has happened since then. These past few months have been especially hard, and while I don't like sharing the grimy details (( in fact I'm really nervous about writing this )), I'm going to do it anyways because I think it'll help me to share what I've been going through personally. I'm the sort of person that is usually happy and upbeat, so when I'm not, it makes me feel off and as a result I often bottle it up. I dunno, I just hate seeing other people get sad or upset and it makes me feel that sharing this sort of information would make others sad too, so I'm always hesitant about saying anything or revealing what truly goes on. I'm not writing this for pity, but I think this might give a little better insight?

In September I had to move from hotel to hotel and city to city until I could no longer afford it and though it pained me, I put my two cats into a no-kill shelter. I haven't seen them since and probably never will again, so I can only hope for the best and pray they are safe and doing well, if not better! After that, I eventually I had to sleep outside and in random office buildings, hiding out on the floor and sleeping under the desks. It was pretty crazy. Towards October I was able to stay at a few friend's houses, and in November I was able to stay for a little bit with my aunt. For Christmas I was able to visit with my sister in Nevada and even got a 3DS along the way! Things aren't quite 100% back to normal, but it's actually getting a LOT better, and after going through all that, I'm seriously so thankful to still be alive. I'm really not sure how I did it, and I'll admit, throughout this experience, I've often been afraid to ask others for help and even felt kind of ashamed to tell people about this situation, but I've gotten some help from friends and it's taken me a long way. Even small things like a new sweater to keep me warm really made me so grateful and gave me hope. I really lost a lot both physically and emotionally and while I often felt like giving up, something kept telling me to keep going, and now that drive is slowly helping me to try and repair the damage, to build myself up again from the ground up.

Wow, it feels so weird typing this all out. But I think just writing this is making me feel a little better! I'm a little worried about what people might think, but I guess the real moral here is don't give up. Things got really bad for me, but I never gave up and now things are already starting to turn around! Even now I can't believe that I'll be going to a convention with friends and hosting a panel. It's really blowing my mind just thinking about it. And of course, I have to say thanks to all you guys, for sticking by me and for keeping interest in my art. It really means so much to me to know that there are such nice people out there.

AND NOW FOR GOOD NEWS: after FC, I'll be returning to FA in February! MORE ART AND MORE ICONS TOO, SO JUST SIT TIGHT.

Thanks guys, I love you all so much. If you really read this all, then you're a real trooper. I hope all of you are doing well and I can't wait to see what 2012 has to offer! I think it's gonna be better this year, I can feel it!

Hey guys. Long time no... nothing?

Basically, this is a run-down on what's been going on with me and why everything is so quiet. I don't really like sharing what goes on in my personal life because having people worry about me just makes me feel terrible, so I might even delete this journal shortly after writing it. You don't have to read it, but I figured some people might be curious as to what's going on anyways?

As for me: For the past few months, I've been... homeless. :S I don't have my own car and can't drive, which makes it even more difficult. At first I was house-hopping around town with just a big duffel bag and my 3 cats until  kilometers very graciously let me stay with him in, but since returning to my town, I've had nowhere to stay but a shady motel. I used to safely live in a house with 5 other renters before all this happened, but I've since then been forbidden from living there because I have cats. The landlords also found "something illegal" and blamed it on me. I never found out what it really was, and I've never done anything drug or smoke-related in my life (( I'm seriously allergic to cigarette smoke! )). The house has had many renters for the past 7+ years, so I have no idea why they specifically blamed me. I have nowhere else to go besides this house, but since I'm not allowed there, I feel like a fugitive, always on the run and always on the move, having to hide my presence everywhere I go. ;_;

My art: You might have noticed that it's stopped. That's because I haven't been drawing. My tablet suddenly broke a month ago, and even though at the time it was still covered by the 2-year warranty, Wacom hasn't taken any action to fixing it, even though I've already sent it in and they confirmed that they received it. I just don't know what to do. Drawing digital commissions was my only income, and I can no longer afford to get another tablet. Normally, I would just do a bunch of commissions to earn the money to get a new one, but now I can't even do that. I don't even have any way of selling traditional art since I only have my basic essentials on me, and I'm constantly traveling, so without my tablet, I feel so stuck.

My cats: This is the part that pains me the most. I have 3 cats. Or at least, I used to. During my stay with  kilometers, he was a swell guy and was able to keep one of my cats with him, which will probably be until further notice (( thanks again Kiro. I really miss him. :< )). As for the other 2, at first I was house-hopping and hotel-rooming with them, but it's gotten to be too much. I'm okay with always being on the move, but I know animals react to it differently, and if I'm this stressed, I can only imagine how stressed they must be. They've been forced to move from place to place with me for months, non-stop. This is something I never wanted to do, but just today I had to put them both in a shelter because I had no other option. I love these cats, I've had them for so long and they are like family to me, and they make me so happy, but I could no longer keep them. I made sure the shelter was a no-kill animal shelter, but still, it kills me that I had to do this. I never once thought it would ever come to this, and I had always imagined growing old with them together. Now they're just gone... I will never see my cats again. They've always been beside me during these hard times. They were my friends, my family. It feels so unreal.

I just feel like I've lost everything. I feel like no one wants me to be alive. I honestly don't know what to do. Just typing this is making me choke up. I'm trying so hard, but no matter what I do, I keep getting stuck. I'm not asking for pity and I'm not wallowing around, I'm mostly just afraid of anyone worrying about me or thinking any less of me by posting this. I probably sound like one big contradiction. These past few months have been so very hard on me, and I'm not sure what will happen or where I'll be in the future, let alone tomorrow. Hopefully some place better. I'm sorry if you read this whole sob-story, but at the same time, thank you for reading it anyways.

ALL CLOSED NOW, THANKS GUYS~<3
Watch out for Round 6 if you missed your chance!

---

Get 'em while they're hot!

For $10, you'll get a super-zoomed-in, crazy colored, and very stylized portrait of whatever character you want!*
*one character per icon

ex:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5234076/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5249550/

They make great icons for FurAffinity, DeviantArt, LiveJournal, Twitter... you name it!
Just comment in this journal with reference! (( PLEASE no NSFW art! ))
And I'll upload all of them at the same time when they are all finished!

I will note each person with my Paypal info after I've added them to the list.
When I have finished them I will also note you with your own icon's link so that you can resize or crop the image as you see fit! (( if you don't know how to crop/resize, just let me know when I note you ))

Thank you to everyone that's interested! <3

1. -spot taken-
2.  Nova_Ghost x2 [paid]x
3.  Tanyar [paid] x
4.  Costello [paid] x
5.  grind [paid] x
6.  Origamigryphon [paid] x
7.  HighZenith [paid] x
8.  EricTheMoogle [paid] x
9.  Krim [paid] x
10.  kiwie [paid] x
11.  Suna [paid] x

Well, to put a long story short, I moved. xD It has been a pretty hectic week too, what with my laptop finally dying and having to go from city to city with my 3 cats! But my super bro  kilometers has been so amazingly nice to me by letting me stay with him for the next month or so in northern California! I've been super stressed out lately and lost a lot of sleep due to the situation (( and I'm sure goes the same for my cats! )), but now that I'll be up here for a little bit, I can finally relax. I'm nearly settled in, so pretty soon, I'm going to open commissions up again, including my Crazy Color icons.

Thanks for understanding and thanks for keeping interest in my art you guys! It really means so much to me, especially when it seems like nothing is going right for me. Just thinking about how many people out there like me and my art makes me feel so much better~

Hi everyone! I'm opening up two $25 Pokemon commission slots, which will look like this:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5900282/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5905734/

Lemme know if you'd like one and I'll put you on the list! Thank you for taking interest! <3

1.  achthenuts - Orochu
2.

I'm not really one to publicly talk about personal issues since it always makes me feel so uncomfortable and awkwardly put on the spot, but I'm not feeling 100% at the moment. I feel so sick both mentally and physically. I'm trying to push forward and I'm hoping it will pass soon, so I really must apologize as this means that I won't be getting my icon commissions done as quickly as usual.

I'm sorry I haven't been answering anyone's comments or notes lately... they're really starting to pile up.

I guess I don't really know how to talk about it. But this song is a good way to sum up how I feel:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eaPa6EDcII

<3 CLOSED NOW. YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME. <3

ROUND 3 IS GO! But first...! *IMPORTANT STUFF*

I really miscalculated the amount of time I spend on these, and Paypal is taking a major chunk of my profits, so unfortunately the new price is $10 per icon! Don't worry though; they won't go any higher in price! I apologize and hope you guys understand! ;_;

---

For $10, you'll get a super-zoomed-in, crazy colored, and very stylized portrait of whatever character you want!*
*one character per icon

ex:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5234076/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5249550/

They make great icons for FurAffinity, DeviantArt, LiveJournal, Twitter... you name it!
Just comment in this journal with reference! (( PLEASE no NSFW art! ))
And I'll upload all of them at the same time when they are all finished!

I will note each person with my Paypal info after I've added them to the list.
When I have finished them I will also note you with your own icon's link so that you can resize or crop the image as you see fit! (( if you don't know how to crop/resize, just let me know when I note you ))

Thank you to everyone that's interested! <3

1.  Alex_Dachshund [paid] x
2.  TheRogueWolf [paid] x
3.  charliewoo [paid] x
4.  kyu [paid] x
5.  BenRierimanu [paid] x
6.  BenRierimanu [paid] x
7.  KitsuneFoxman [paid] x
8.  Fancy-Fancy [paid] x
9.  kusabigao [paid] x
10.  Toxicko [paid] x
11.  icee [paid] x
12.  cubeychou [paid] x
13.  slatsduhredem [paid] ref 1 ref 2 x

I'm going on a trip to Nevada to visit with my family, so I'm gonna be gone for some time! DON'T MISS ME TOO MUCH~

I'll be sure to read all of your comments and shouts and love notes when I get back though!

(( And don't worry! I have plans in the future for round 3 of my crazy color icons! :D ))

MWAH MWAH lots of love!
, CC

Here we go again! ROUND 2!

For $10, you'll get a super-zoomed-in, crazy colored, and very stylized portrait of whatever character you want!*
*one character per icon

ex:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5234076/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5249550/

They make great icons for FurAffinity, DeviantArt, LiveJournal, Twitter... you name it!
Just comment in this journal with reference! (( PLEASE no NSFW art! ))
And I'll upload all 9 at the same time when they are all finished!

I will note each person with my Paypal info after I've added them to the list.
When I have finished them I will also note you with your own icon's link so that you can resize or crop the image as you see fit! (( if you don't know how to crop/resize, just let me know when I note you ))

Thank you to everyone that's interested! <3

1.  hulex [paid]
2.  muttmonster [paid]
3.  muttmonster [paid]
4.  brookelynn [paid]
5.  thevampirebat [paid]
6.  purplekecleon [paid]
7.  cbag [paid]
8.  john_the_dragon [paid]
9.  john_the_dragon [paid]

WAAAHHH THESE FILLED UP FAST. CLOSED FOR NOW.

So many people requested that I open up icon commissions, so I'm gonna give this a try! I'm opening up 9 slots for starters!

For $10, you'll get a super-zoomed-in, crazy colored, and very stylized portrait of whatever character you want!*
*one character per icon

ex: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5234076/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5238085/

They make great icons for FurAffinity, DeviantArt, LiveJournal, Twitter... you name it!
Just comment in this journal with reference! (( PLEASE no NSFW art! ))
And I'll upload all 9 at the same time when they are all finished!

I will note each person with my Paypal info after I've added them to the list.
When I have finished them I will also note you with your own icon's link so that you can resize or crop the image as you see fit! (( if you don't know how to crop/resize, just let me know when I note you ))

Thank you to everyone that's interested! <3

1.  latiass [paid???]
2.  NicolaiBunny [paid]
3.  blackberry_pie [paid]
4.  blackberry_pie [paid]
5.  kilometers [paid]
6.  MaxCoyote [paid]
7.  MaxCoyote [paid]
8.  Xylophagous [paid]
9.  marl [paid]

I've got art block and it's BAAAAAAD. There's all these blocks around blocking my art and I dunno what to do!

Darn blocks. Why couldn't you be something nicer, like a flower or something?!? Instead I have all these blocks and they're not pretty.

(( No really. How do you guys get over art block? >_< ))

I blame the blocks.

All full! Thank you so much guys!

Hey guys! I feel like doing something different, so I'm going to be opening up TEN $10 cute critter commission slots! Depending on how successful these are will depend on if I do more in the future! :D

What is a cute critter commission? It's where I take your original character/furry and I redraw it into my own style as if it were my own character. So expect it to be very small and cute!

ex: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5063333/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/4765135/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/4608573/

If your character has clothes or jewelry, I might take artistic liberties to make it fit with my style more, so make sure you are okay with this!

Just comment in this journal with reference (( PLEASE no NSFW art! ))!

Thank you to everyone that's interested! <3

1.  Raevis
2.  kilometers
3.  zipperface
4.  markoh
5.  latiass
6.  latiass (( SPOT HOG ))
7.  Deathbycardboardbox
8.  muttmonster
9.  muttmonster
10.  ryunwoofie
11.  ericthemoogle