Well, another year done, finished, over! But what a year it was. I wanted to write something at my first year anniversary on FA on the 13th of November. But I decided against it, since it didn't matter that much. I might as well make it all in one post. Combining New Year's Eve with it as well. Perhaps even some New Year's resolutions.

What do I want to talk about now? It's simple. Just letting this past year, my feelings, and everything surrounding it go. This is all kind of personal, but I won't reveal too much, just my experience in life this year, and perhaps some things that I did that really made me happier than I have ever been.

How was my 2023 overall?[/center]

I think it was probably the most turbulent year in my life. From a mental and emotional perspective, it was challenging for me since I am very introverted, and I confronted myself with creating that FA account to go out and “meet” new people in this fandom. I am shy beyond measure, I don't feel comfortable just talking to anybody. I am bad at small talk and all of those things. Furthermore, I just have a difficult time dealing with everything social. I already knew this a long time ago. But I paired my ambitions to meetup new people and post my stuff with my thirst to learn how to draw, to get creative in some form or way, like writing small lore pieces or simply drawing some amateur stuff. This helped me to get into an overall better headspace, in hindsight, it probably was the best decision of my life, creating this silly account on this silly p*** website.

I started commissioning stuff, getting adopts and spending my money and time this way. And it is just such a fun way of spending my time, even now. Thinking about some lore and some character designs, possible changes and simply relations between my character, is mesmerizing. I am thrilled, simply stunned to have made this experience which really helped me get to know some of you quite well. Which I am ultimately deeply thankful off. It always brings up a smile, thinking about it, the decision to just tap into this fandom more and more. There are some things I despise, but no one said it's perfect, so we just gotta live with it. Especially how nice and eager some people are surprised me, made my first real friend in this fandom from a random YCH I bought. Which is, in hindsight, kind of silly and kind of cute. But yeah, life does have unexpected turns and twists occasionally, and this certainly was and still is a pleasant one.

Offering my help just by listening, talking or helping people with my opinion and stuff felt great, and it still does. I made an excellent friend this way, by just helping to answer some questions with my perspective on things. Which is wonderful. I am truly grateful that they reached out to me, otherwise I wouldn't have so many good friends now. Even though I wish I could do more.

Thinking about it, I am truly thankful to anyone I met accidentally, or anyone who reached out to me. There are, of course, a few bad apples, but I don't let them sour the whole batch. I am really fond of my friends I made here, each one of you made me happier, made me realize what I want to do with my life. Helped me challenge my core beliefs, spreading awareness and motivating me beyond measure. It really brings me joy to mention this, each one of them, changed me in ways they couldn't understand, making me focus on what is important. Instead of all the negativity out there, I tried embracing being open about everything concerning my life. I always say that I am an open book and will answer any question my friends have about me in general. In any specific way, shape or form, not limiting any subject. Which in turn made me realize what an f*** up I was in my own eyes. Made me realize, where I should head with my life, while showing me my worst qualities. Ugly jealousy and just envy, lots of it that kept on coming out sometimes, but it's with everything in life. Getting up and keeping the struggle alive is half the battle, right? At least I think about it this way, but I also embraced other things, good things in life. Just enjoying the simple stuff, clearing my headspace with the help of some of my dearest friends. Going on walks for hours in a remote part of nature here in Germany, which a very dear friend recommended to me. Especially the spring weather really helped out there. Hearing some fitting music (usually the Oblivion or the Kingdom Come Deliverance OSt), it did feel like a cleansing experience. Simply amazing, and I would recommend it to anyone, who has troubles with his emotions and mentality, to just go outside, and take a walk somewhere peaceful. Being lonely is a bad feeling, but being at peace and in solitude is something else, far better than to just being in misery all the time. And the fresh air alone, the sun. It just helped me in more ways I could describe here. I think if you try to be happy, eventually you will be. That's the way I want to live, I intend to try to be the best version “me”, that I can be.

Which does bring me to my next point. I finally got a clear vision of what I would want to look and feel like. I made some first experiments with one friend, getting to know them better and well simply enjoying their company through texting. He helped me, getting to know me better as well, kind of digging and revealing what I want in my life. Sexuality wise as well as just looks. So on the 15th of Mai, this year, paired with some earlier things happening as I mentioned before. I decided to ramp up my efforts, trying heavily, seriously and with a furious motivation to lose weight, trying my efforts to get first and foremost better health, and getting my ideal visual. I just want to look like a "femboy", if that makes sense? I just love the look and I can't help it, so I let all that help me, motivate me. And well, a couple of months later, here I am. I was initially weighing about 110kg (242lbs) at a height of about 1.68m (5.51 ftft). So, I was clinically obese, although not critically. I could manage my everyday life just fine. And now I am weighing 87kg (191lbs) which is incredible. I feel flexible, I feel healthy, I just feel like a different person, able to do different things I couldn't do before, daily life has just improved immensely. Even the order a daily 1hr workout, cardio has brought left me feeling accomplished, even after a 10-hour shift of work. And I have to thank every friend I made along the way for it, just talking about it inspired me greatly. Even through hardships and doubt, I felt like I could talk to someone about it, without being judged or anything. Which is something I hold incredibly close to my heart. Even though, the road isn't over yet, and christmas time has been killing my progress, just a back and forth, but I will never gain that weight back again, that is something I promised myself. Keeping it off, is way easier than getting rid of it, so yeah. I am doing good, so no need to worry about that part.

Well, it all comes back to just being happy. I am happy that I made many changes to my life. I am happy that I got this lucky with meeting people online, good people from all over the world. I am incredibly happy to call them some of my dearest and most trusted friends. And I am also proud, that these people are simply remarkable. Each with their struggle, imperfect like me, but never losing the will to fight. That makes me proud, that makes me happy. And know this. If I can help any of you with something, please let me know. I mean it, you changed my life to be far better than it used to be. Seriously, I want to give back whatever I can to make the same easier for you. Just as you did with me <3, perhaps even without your knowing!

I told one friend already. We all live inside small bubbles, small worlds we call our lives. And well, some of you changed my life, my world immensely. To the utmost better, I should add. So please let me know what, how and if I can help you.

[center]Well, what about 2024?

Definitely going to keep on doing some workout, currently adjusting stuff according to the seasonal change. But Cardio will still be number #1 for me. Subsequently, stretching and certainly some body weight training. I do still want to try to get that nice feminine shape. Which I currently think is still possible, even with the damage done over my life so far.

Furthermore, I want to draw and write more. That's like an endless spiral. Being creative in some form or way is important to me, especially considering how much I have grown to like my characters. I do want to publish 1x Artwork or 1x longer Story on here every month. Just to get things going. I am going to use January as a cleanup for my folders, lore bits and universe stories. So I can get in with a clean slate. I also want to finish up a rough draft of my world map, which I am creating currently.

I wish to help each friend as best as I can, I want to visit some in either 2024 or 2025, and just get to know them better. Perhaps even make some new acquaintances along the way. I want to do each one of you justice!

Thank You

Seriously, I cant thank any of you enough. You made me a better person, happier than I have ever been and all that by simply existing and interacting with me. Sounds silly I know, but I love you all. You have grown very dear to me, very important and I appreciate every message, every artwork we share and every conversation we have. Thank you <3!

Just some space, a rough WIP, a place to gather some Links to other artworks I wont upload here.

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52122467/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52898161/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52541609/

(#3B8FE3) Titel (#9EE4DF)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Alt. 1 | Alt. 2 | Alt. 3 | Alt. 4
Original Submission
Story

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Descrip[color=#489090]t[/color]ion

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Story

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Remarks

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Artists

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Characte[/color][color=#428E7E]rs

Renpet © Davidsch

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Changing the Colors in a submission through this Website

Only highlight character names, titles.

Hyperlink: xxxxxx

Anira
Anira

Eimir
Eimir

Renpet
Renpet

Belzy
Belzy

Theya
Theya

Elzevir
Elzevir

Neli
Neli

Fayris
Fayris

Aster
Aster

Fugax
Fugax

Neema
Neema

Selene
Selene

Ithriel
Ithriel

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[h1Sleepover[/h1]
Original Submission


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Remarks

Kindly, Dawn offered Fugax to stay a while. Up late, they ended up missing time as it flew by quicker than they expected. Spent time wonderfully, they ended up enacting a cute sleepover all accidentally, bonding over their love. Only question left is, what they are dreaming about....

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Characte[/color][color=#428E7E]rs

Fugax © Davidsch
Dawn © Ora.Ora

RECOMMAN[/color][color=#6FBCE0]DATIONS

Please go and check those artists below out, they have wonderful styles of many different kinds, each with their own strengths and weaknesses! They are wonderful people that deserve more attention than they got.

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