Haven't Done A Journal In A While
Posted 7 years agoI've been pretty busy. Got sick in March and pretty much been in the hospital. I'm better now. Been playing Monster Hunter World. A totally awesome game. And its so much fun playing it. Play Warframe and caught up the latest Prime Warframe and weapons. Getting ready for the next quest and Prime Warframe and weapons to come to consoles.
Overall, I wanted to upload some pictures I've done while I was dogsitting/housesitting for a friend. But looking at my drawings...I'm not quite proud. In fact, looking at my drawings. I'm not quite proud of them. I feel that I haven't improved on anything. Even when I wanted to try something new and draw more. I judge it too harshly to a point where I don't feel like doing it.
Maybe its me playing the game too much or things in my life just got worse. I feel that I'm not being creative no matter what characters I come up with. I feel like going backwards on the art style that I use to draw alot. I'm talking about Sonic Style art. And forgetting about making FCs and such.
I just feel that my creativity is just too much for me to handle. And I feel its not good enough. Everything I do at this point is not good enough. I've been feeling depressed and haven't been swinging hard with pictures. Looking at my friend's drawing. I feel he has improved alot. Even though time is never kind to him but he always manage to make his artwork good. So much improvement he has. For me, I'm still the same. I feel I can't change anything about myself.
I feel that I've been deluding myself to think that I'll get better in time. But I get distracted so easily. Hell, I quit Overwatch. You would think that I would be focus by now. But nah, I just wanted to play games with the friends I have left. But I feel that I'm alone again. Everyone has moved on and doing good with themselves.
I've tried so much to change and moved on to get better. But I feel its never good enough....I'm never good enough.... so. This is my last journal. And my last time being on this account. I won't closed my account or delete anything. I'll just leave it as it is. As a reminder that I'll never improve. And that my efforts will never be good enough.
Overall, I wanted to upload some pictures I've done while I was dogsitting/housesitting for a friend. But looking at my drawings...I'm not quite proud. In fact, looking at my drawings. I'm not quite proud of them. I feel that I haven't improved on anything. Even when I wanted to try something new and draw more. I judge it too harshly to a point where I don't feel like doing it.
Maybe its me playing the game too much or things in my life just got worse. I feel that I'm not being creative no matter what characters I come up with. I feel like going backwards on the art style that I use to draw alot. I'm talking about Sonic Style art. And forgetting about making FCs and such.
I just feel that my creativity is just too much for me to handle. And I feel its not good enough. Everything I do at this point is not good enough. I've been feeling depressed and haven't been swinging hard with pictures. Looking at my friend's drawing. I feel he has improved alot. Even though time is never kind to him but he always manage to make his artwork good. So much improvement he has. For me, I'm still the same. I feel I can't change anything about myself.
I feel that I've been deluding myself to think that I'll get better in time. But I get distracted so easily. Hell, I quit Overwatch. You would think that I would be focus by now. But nah, I just wanted to play games with the friends I have left. But I feel that I'm alone again. Everyone has moved on and doing good with themselves.
I've tried so much to change and moved on to get better. But I feel its never good enough....I'm never good enough.... so. This is my last journal. And my last time being on this account. I won't closed my account or delete anything. I'll just leave it as it is. As a reminder that I'll never improve. And that my efforts will never be good enough.
Merry Christmas Everyone
Posted 7 years agoTitle Sez
Disconnect
Posted 8 years agoI really have nothing to say. Except that I'm streaming alot more of games than art. And I decided to discontinue the comic I was working on because I don't have time and other personal issues. To be honest, I don't think I have the drive anymore. I'm going to keep my artwork. But I'm going to be gaming more. So, you can check me out on
EminenceObscure on youtube.
Thinking about doing the same to Twitch. Still thinking on that.
Thanks for everything.
EminenceObscure on youtube.
Thinking about doing the same to Twitch. Still thinking on that.
Thanks for everything.
Those With Talent Can Make it...
Posted 8 years agoIn the meantime, I'm just drawing because its what I really like to do. Its a hobby yes. But I'm no professional at it. As long as I've been drawing, I've been finding it relaxing to relax me after a hard day of trying to get by with little currency I have.
Dog sitting can only get me so far til I'm not needed. Its the summer so it should be easy to find a job. Might go for temp since I'm the type that get used and tossed to the side once my service is up. But if I don't find a permament job, than I'm gonna have to move back in with my mother since we barely can keep up the expense of the rent and the utilities cost.
Trying to get help is hard but your never noticed unless your fully dedicated to what you love doing. I'm doing what I can for now while looking.
But lately, I've been mainly down in the dumps. I just feel like a empty shell, well more like a shell that I've build around me with the things that made me happy. Not caring about being close to anyone like friends. I just feel like one of those people that is in the crowd of people, surrounded by friends and or family. The moment you spoke they would be surprised that your even there. Which hurts alot to the point where I just stay away. Sure, I get to talk to them but only for a short time because their busy, or I'm too boring.
I guess I'm pretty bland since I don't attract people anymore. So, I won't do commissions and or YCH. I'll just continue to draw because it makes me content with what I can do. And I don't have no one to judge me for it. Or to say what they think about it.
Even if its critique. So, I guess I should do what I can. And hope it doesn't get to that point down the road. But in the meantime, I'm going to upload what I can and stream how long I can. Because I'm gonna be gone for a couple of days again. Still dog sitting, and hopefully, this summer will be a little less rocky than how it was for the past couple of months.
If you have a PS4, I'm usually on Warframe or Overwatch. I wouldn't mind helping you out in Warframe or playing with you on Overwatch. Either way, I feel that I don't have to do things alone.
PSN: EminenceObscure7
Dog sitting can only get me so far til I'm not needed. Its the summer so it should be easy to find a job. Might go for temp since I'm the type that get used and tossed to the side once my service is up. But if I don't find a permament job, than I'm gonna have to move back in with my mother since we barely can keep up the expense of the rent and the utilities cost.
Trying to get help is hard but your never noticed unless your fully dedicated to what you love doing. I'm doing what I can for now while looking.
But lately, I've been mainly down in the dumps. I just feel like a empty shell, well more like a shell that I've build around me with the things that made me happy. Not caring about being close to anyone like friends. I just feel like one of those people that is in the crowd of people, surrounded by friends and or family. The moment you spoke they would be surprised that your even there. Which hurts alot to the point where I just stay away. Sure, I get to talk to them but only for a short time because their busy, or I'm too boring.
I guess I'm pretty bland since I don't attract people anymore. So, I won't do commissions and or YCH. I'll just continue to draw because it makes me content with what I can do. And I don't have no one to judge me for it. Or to say what they think about it.
Even if its critique. So, I guess I should do what I can. And hope it doesn't get to that point down the road. But in the meantime, I'm going to upload what I can and stream how long I can. Because I'm gonna be gone for a couple of days again. Still dog sitting, and hopefully, this summer will be a little less rocky than how it was for the past couple of months.
If you have a PS4, I'm usually on Warframe or Overwatch. I wouldn't mind helping you out in Warframe or playing with you on Overwatch. Either way, I feel that I don't have to do things alone.
PSN: EminenceObscure7
Struggling...
Posted 8 years agoI've been at this idea/comic for a while now. When I chose to work on this particular comic. I stick with it. But so many ideas, structure, characters, lore, and the creation of the world was too much for me to handle. Normally, it was fun but that ended quickly when things started to pile up while I tried to get the characters situated. When RL hit ya, you intend to stall alot and than when you get back into it. You started to hate what you build, even if it didn't go anywhere. I judge my work harshly to the point of trashing it. I wanted to continue but I couldn't because it stresses me out and I don't like the lore and everything about the story. I feel that I'm just piling it up to the point where it stays and trying to get there will be impossible because I get distracted alot. I was thinking of writing a story about it. But my grammar is so poor that I don't have the confidence to even start it. I'll make too many mistakes and I wouldn't see it unless I repeat the line over and over in my head. Or I say it out loud to find the problem and correct it. Plus, my husband is putting more into than I could and making his character the key of the story while my girls are just support. That's how I look at it anyway.
Which is why I don't tell him anything unless I needed help. But than it turns into an rp and suddenly it just end. With me not doing it because we did it in rp form. *sigh*
I just can't stick with anything these days. I'll do pictures when I'm in a mood. But stories, I think that's too much for me. I feel that its not good enough. I feel most of the material I made is not good enough. Its too cartoony and that's just how I am with my drawings.
Plus, I prepare myself for situations like this anyway. If I ended up quiting what I was doing (since I'm good at that anyway) I will revert back to how I was doing. Making random pictures, no stories. That way my artwork can be consistent rather than waiting for months for me to upload something.
I'm still alive and fairly well. Just hadn't been in a mood or been distracted by games. I'll make an attempt to draw something. But my fursona will stay the same. Lynn Carne, honey badger.
Which is why I don't tell him anything unless I needed help. But than it turns into an rp and suddenly it just end. With me not doing it because we did it in rp form. *sigh*
I just can't stick with anything these days. I'll do pictures when I'm in a mood. But stories, I think that's too much for me. I feel that its not good enough. I feel most of the material I made is not good enough. Its too cartoony and that's just how I am with my drawings.
Plus, I prepare myself for situations like this anyway. If I ended up quiting what I was doing (since I'm good at that anyway) I will revert back to how I was doing. Making random pictures, no stories. That way my artwork can be consistent rather than waiting for months for me to upload something.
I'm still alive and fairly well. Just hadn't been in a mood or been distracted by games. I'll make an attempt to draw something. But my fursona will stay the same. Lynn Carne, honey badger.
Christmas and New Year Resolution
Posted 8 years agoThis year has been really slow for me. Well, Christmas is going to be fun since I'm gonna spend some time with my family. Won't have much for Christmas since I'm pretty much broke and have to pay the bills and such. But really, I don't need much except for my husband and family. Plus, I'm gonna be dogsitting so that's like christmas money to spend on getting my family something. At least $20 worth of stuff that I know they will use.
As for new year goes, I have thought long and hard about a certain game that I've been playing for a good while. And that game is Warframe. I've been slowly and surely getting stuff that I missed having back on the PS4. Having a Ember Prime for the first time is amazing. And getting my Frost Prime is gonna be awesome since it was my first prime warframe I ever had when I first started to play it on the PC. Oh and the Glaive Prime, Reaper Prime and the Latron Prime at the weapons that I have on my PC is now on the PS4. So, I'm happy that I've obtain what I have on the PC. Of course, I don't have the Rhino Prime and wish I have the Loki Prime and the Boltor Prime. But I'm sure it will be unvaulted soon. Maybe I would come back when I hear news about it. Once I've obtain the items one Warframe before they are vaulted I'm going to take a long break.
Its not that I'm getting bored with the game. Its just I'm starting to experience some health issues that effect me.
Main reason, I always get headaches after playing Warframe for a long extended time. Normally, in my case it would be 8 hours of gameplay a day. Even when I change the options to tone down the colors and stuff. It still looks a mess and I barely see anything since most mission are heavily dimmed anyway. Its just the effects, the colors that players chose for their warframe are heavily bright and the abilities would go off in a seizure fit that its a strain on my eyes. I do take breaks but it result of me having a heachaches that last hours at a time.
Right now, I'm experiencing it after playing just 30 minutes of Warframe. So, once the year is over and I have obtain what I want in the game. I'm gonna stop playing the game entirely for a good 6 months. I know its a long time, but I hate having headaches and most of the medicines I take for it doesn't work for me. So, in the meantime, I'm gonna play something that isn't eye inducing color flashing game.
Skyrim: Remastered Edition!
So, yeah. I'm gonna take a long break from Warframe when New Year hits. And focus more on my drawings and such since I've been lacking this year.
Happy Holidays and Be Safe.
As for new year goes, I have thought long and hard about a certain game that I've been playing for a good while. And that game is Warframe. I've been slowly and surely getting stuff that I missed having back on the PS4. Having a Ember Prime for the first time is amazing. And getting my Frost Prime is gonna be awesome since it was my first prime warframe I ever had when I first started to play it on the PC. Oh and the Glaive Prime, Reaper Prime and the Latron Prime at the weapons that I have on my PC is now on the PS4. So, I'm happy that I've obtain what I have on the PC. Of course, I don't have the Rhino Prime and wish I have the Loki Prime and the Boltor Prime. But I'm sure it will be unvaulted soon. Maybe I would come back when I hear news about it. Once I've obtain the items one Warframe before they are vaulted I'm going to take a long break.
Its not that I'm getting bored with the game. Its just I'm starting to experience some health issues that effect me.
Main reason, I always get headaches after playing Warframe for a long extended time. Normally, in my case it would be 8 hours of gameplay a day. Even when I change the options to tone down the colors and stuff. It still looks a mess and I barely see anything since most mission are heavily dimmed anyway. Its just the effects, the colors that players chose for their warframe are heavily bright and the abilities would go off in a seizure fit that its a strain on my eyes. I do take breaks but it result of me having a heachaches that last hours at a time.
Right now, I'm experiencing it after playing just 30 minutes of Warframe. So, once the year is over and I have obtain what I want in the game. I'm gonna stop playing the game entirely for a good 6 months. I know its a long time, but I hate having headaches and most of the medicines I take for it doesn't work for me. So, in the meantime, I'm gonna play something that isn't eye inducing color flashing game.
Skyrim: Remastered Edition!
So, yeah. I'm gonna take a long break from Warframe when New Year hits. And focus more on my drawings and such since I've been lacking this year.
Happy Holidays and Be Safe.
Sudden Absence
Posted 9 years agoIf you haven't been watching the weather forecast about Hurricane Matthew. Well, I will say it in a brief summary.
Oct. 8th, North Carolina was hit by Hurricane Matthew. Resulting in a flash flood warning in a area where I live at. It was raining, wind was blowing and knocking down trees and powerline. It was one of the scariest situations I have ever been since I was dogsitting at the time and my husband was working during the storm.
Oct. 9th, It kept continuing to rain to the point where we have to evacuate where we live. I end up staying with my mother for a couple of days til the storm die down. So, I haven't been on my computer since all that was happening. I didn't return back home til Monday.
When I got back everything in the house was intact. Small debris in the yard but no water damage whatsoever. But we had an unexpected guest. A stray black cat was hiding under the bed. It probably took refuge since the vent on the floor was popped up and the hose to the AC is damaged. I didn't care because we are not using the AC since its broken anyway.
And now, everyone that lives in the city can't use water for anything unless its boiled first. I've been keeping up to date about the water issue. According to them, we will have safe clean water Around Thursday. So, I went and got two cases of water to last until than.
However, I've been stressing out because of financial issues. Since the storm hit my chances of looking for a job came to a hault. Places that I applied for are either closed or doing their best to whatever resource they have without using the water.
But I'm glad things are slowly going back to normal. As for me, well I'm struggling as usual. Trying to sell stuff to get money and provide food for my dog and paying them damn bills. Which is started to be the issue now since I'm behind a couple. It hasn't been easy and I've been trying to get by with what I can do. Drawing for donations, commissions, everything. Trying to be more active on the internet. Since I've been inactive I fear that hurt me quite alot since I haven't been able to do anything. I did started on a few sketches but since the storm hit I've been busy stocking up food and water and trying to get some relaxation since it takes alot out of me. Had a major headache from the stress. Didn't go to bed til 2AM and been occupying myself with Dragon Age Inquisition while the net was down.
Your probably wondering, why haven't you started on drawing pictures and stuff. Well, 2 reason.
Reason 1: Haven't been in a mood to draw anything that comes to mind.
Reason 2: Didn't have any ideas for a while until now.
So, I'm back and ready to upload more pokemon pictures and other drawings.
Oct. 8th, North Carolina was hit by Hurricane Matthew. Resulting in a flash flood warning in a area where I live at. It was raining, wind was blowing and knocking down trees and powerline. It was one of the scariest situations I have ever been since I was dogsitting at the time and my husband was working during the storm.
Oct. 9th, It kept continuing to rain to the point where we have to evacuate where we live. I end up staying with my mother for a couple of days til the storm die down. So, I haven't been on my computer since all that was happening. I didn't return back home til Monday.
When I got back everything in the house was intact. Small debris in the yard but no water damage whatsoever. But we had an unexpected guest. A stray black cat was hiding under the bed. It probably took refuge since the vent on the floor was popped up and the hose to the AC is damaged. I didn't care because we are not using the AC since its broken anyway.
And now, everyone that lives in the city can't use water for anything unless its boiled first. I've been keeping up to date about the water issue. According to them, we will have safe clean water Around Thursday. So, I went and got two cases of water to last until than.
However, I've been stressing out because of financial issues. Since the storm hit my chances of looking for a job came to a hault. Places that I applied for are either closed or doing their best to whatever resource they have without using the water.
But I'm glad things are slowly going back to normal. As for me, well I'm struggling as usual. Trying to sell stuff to get money and provide food for my dog and paying them damn bills. Which is started to be the issue now since I'm behind a couple. It hasn't been easy and I've been trying to get by with what I can do. Drawing for donations, commissions, everything. Trying to be more active on the internet. Since I've been inactive I fear that hurt me quite alot since I haven't been able to do anything. I did started on a few sketches but since the storm hit I've been busy stocking up food and water and trying to get some relaxation since it takes alot out of me. Had a major headache from the stress. Didn't go to bed til 2AM and been occupying myself with Dragon Age Inquisition while the net was down.
Your probably wondering, why haven't you started on drawing pictures and stuff. Well, 2 reason.
Reason 1: Haven't been in a mood to draw anything that comes to mind.
Reason 2: Didn't have any ideas for a while until now.
So, I'm back and ready to upload more pokemon pictures and other drawings.
Finalize
Posted 9 years agoFirst of I want to say that my gallery has been inconsistent. Unsure what I really like. I don't want to go back to Sonic because I've been down that path before and I have nothing to offer with it. Besides, not sure if its still popular anymore. Plus, not alot of people like Espio the chameleon because he's a obscure character. I like Shadow the hedgehog but who doesn't. So, I won't do anything Sonic related unless its a request from someone that wanted me to do a sonic picture with their FCs. I won't judge.
Here are the things that I have decided to draw from now on. Its 2 things.
1. Me and my husband's fursona: Reason for that being is because I love my husband. But I wanted to do more with it since I'm started to get a bit better drawing honey badgers and rabbits. I really wanted to do a story. I feel more comfortable in the fantasy department since I can make up anything and I have played lots of MMORPG games and watching anime that is fantasy base. Kinda like Grimgar or Konosuba. Sorry, SAO doesn't interest me in the slightest. Plus, I want to show that Honey badgers can be sexy too. Gotta give them cute lil mammals some love. Plus, it fits me very well since I'm persistent and will proceed with what I do no matter what. Plus, my husband is supporting me on it.
2. Pokemon- Compare to Sonic and Zootopia, I've been drawing Pokemon alot, ever since they announced Sun and Moon. Unfortunately, I won't get the game on the day it comes out because that shit cost alot of money for 2 3DS and two games. If things goes well and I get a job I can save up for that. If not well, I guess I'm gonna have to settle with not playing the game and slowly lose interest. But I will not give up drawing the Sun and Moon pokemon. I have ideas that I want to do with and I wanted to be something that I can do besides doing my fursonas for a while.
Those are the main two that I'm gonna stick with. So, please support me if your into original creative drawing and stories of my fursona or you just love pokemon in general.
I'm gonna be active on three of these accounts. FA, DA, and Tumblr. BTW, Tumblr is for my Undertale projects. Follow me and show your love and support. I appreciate it. Back to organizing my gallery page so it can look decent to review what I'm capable of and maybe if you want a request. Don't be afraid to ask.
Here are the things that I have decided to draw from now on. Its 2 things.
1. Me and my husband's fursona: Reason for that being is because I love my husband. But I wanted to do more with it since I'm started to get a bit better drawing honey badgers and rabbits. I really wanted to do a story. I feel more comfortable in the fantasy department since I can make up anything and I have played lots of MMORPG games and watching anime that is fantasy base. Kinda like Grimgar or Konosuba. Sorry, SAO doesn't interest me in the slightest. Plus, I want to show that Honey badgers can be sexy too. Gotta give them cute lil mammals some love. Plus, it fits me very well since I'm persistent and will proceed with what I do no matter what. Plus, my husband is supporting me on it.
2. Pokemon- Compare to Sonic and Zootopia, I've been drawing Pokemon alot, ever since they announced Sun and Moon. Unfortunately, I won't get the game on the day it comes out because that shit cost alot of money for 2 3DS and two games. If things goes well and I get a job I can save up for that. If not well, I guess I'm gonna have to settle with not playing the game and slowly lose interest. But I will not give up drawing the Sun and Moon pokemon. I have ideas that I want to do with and I wanted to be something that I can do besides doing my fursonas for a while.
Those are the main two that I'm gonna stick with. So, please support me if your into original creative drawing and stories of my fursona or you just love pokemon in general.
I'm gonna be active on three of these accounts. FA, DA, and Tumblr. BTW, Tumblr is for my Undertale projects. Follow me and show your love and support. I appreciate it. Back to organizing my gallery page so it can look decent to review what I'm capable of and maybe if you want a request. Don't be afraid to ask.
Consistent
Posted 9 years agoI need to be more consistent with my drawings. I want to make this something I want to do to help my husband. I'm still looking for a job but its starting to get hard now because of unexpected bills that need to pay. I made a patreon account. But I'm not well known yet. Once I'm more consistent with my artwork I might resume doing request. But I need to draw more of Lynn and Drake and perhaps old characters I made a long time ago to see how much I have progressed.
Not Gonna Worry
Posted 9 years agoAfter dogsitting for two weeks. I am finally home. Now I can focus on drawing. But you know, Warframe keeps pulling me in. Hehehe. I guess old habits don't die. Lol. But I do intend to focus more on drawing alot of my fursonas and pokemon. But I decided to put the commissions on hold because I'm looking for a job. Certain situations has put me in a bind to where I need to find one now.
Reason:
1. Personal finances. Will not say what.
2. Neighbor nagging trips. Basically, I've been constantly being bothered to drive to places that are not important. Plus, if I do have one I won't be bothered all that much. Let's just say, I don't like to socialize with neighbors unless I need to.
Yeah, good luck with me finding a job since social skills are usually what I need to work on. So, that's pretty much it.
If you want to donate, I don't mind. It doesn't have to be much. It can be a picture of my fursonas, a dollar to my paypal, or a comment of criticism and encouragement.
So, that's pretty much all I have to say.
Reason:
1. Personal finances. Will not say what.
2. Neighbor nagging trips. Basically, I've been constantly being bothered to drive to places that are not important. Plus, if I do have one I won't be bothered all that much. Let's just say, I don't like to socialize with neighbors unless I need to.
Yeah, good luck with me finding a job since social skills are usually what I need to work on. So, that's pretty much it.
If you want to donate, I don't mind. It doesn't have to be much. It can be a picture of my fursonas, a dollar to my paypal, or a comment of criticism and encouragement.
So, that's pretty much all I have to say.
Back for the weekend
Posted 9 years agoBack for the weekend from house sitting. Its been a long 5 days. Well, tomorrow I'm going to be streaming all day long. Since I have tons of ideas and inspirations since I've been watching anime on crunchyroll. I'm so pumped and excited. Not to mention seeing new pokemon. Gonna make a couple of pics about that.
5 Days From Now
Posted 9 years agoIf you read my previous journal. I'm dogsitting for a friend of mine who is out of town. I won't be streaming during that time. So, if your wondering where I am. I'm taking care of the dogs. I will be back on the weekends to stream if I can.
Dog Sit for 2 weeks
Posted 9 years agoFinally a side job! It makes me very happy that I got something to do that allow me to get more money. But still I do commissions if your interested. However, it will be slow because I'm going to be dog sitting. Meaning no computer access til the weekend.
I have set up a schedule for me so it can be easy on gas. Weekdays, I'm gonna be staying at a friend's house to dogsit. And on the weekend I stay home to draw and stream whenever I can. I'm still dogsitting until my friend comes home from her vacation. So, I'm gonna stream today and the weekend til Monday. I always start my stream 5PM Eastern Time, since I'm busy in RL.
I will tweet and maybe do side drawings to post on tumblr and twitter.
Remember to follow me on twitter I have that information in my profile so you can follow me and know what I'm doing.
Thanks for understanding
I have set up a schedule for me so it can be easy on gas. Weekdays, I'm gonna be staying at a friend's house to dogsit. And on the weekend I stay home to draw and stream whenever I can. I'm still dogsitting until my friend comes home from her vacation. So, I'm gonna stream today and the weekend til Monday. I always start my stream 5PM Eastern Time, since I'm busy in RL.
I will tweet and maybe do side drawings to post on tumblr and twitter.
Remember to follow me on twitter I have that information in my profile so you can follow me and know what I'm doing.
Thanks for understanding
Won't Stream Tonight
Posted 9 years agoTitle sez
Been busy. Laundry day and being pissed off. At what? I won't say because its a personal matter and its pissing me off. Me being pissed off effected heavily on my artwork so I won't be drawing anything until things are settled. I'll start streaming tomorrow after I take care of some things in RL. Just hope I don't get bothered once I took care of my personal business. Thanks for understanding.
Been busy. Laundry day and being pissed off. At what? I won't say because its a personal matter and its pissing me off. Me being pissed off effected heavily on my artwork so I won't be drawing anything until things are settled. I'll start streaming tomorrow after I take care of some things in RL. Just hope I don't get bothered once I took care of my personal business. Thanks for understanding.
Comic Decision
Posted 9 years agoI decided not to do a comic based on the fursona of me and my husband. Two reason...
1. Its hard to come up with original content. Plus, its very hard to stick with the story when I procrastinate on it too long.
2. I'm just not ready to do a longated comic based on the two. I decided to just do pictures of me and my husband fursona being together.
However, I will only do short comics that involve sex. Those are the type that he looks forward to. Not a manga like story that comes in volumes. So, I will do more fursona and other pictures. Depends on my mood though. Sorry for the inconvience and the delay of my comic. So, don't expect a page or so.
1. Its hard to come up with original content. Plus, its very hard to stick with the story when I procrastinate on it too long.
2. I'm just not ready to do a longated comic based on the two. I decided to just do pictures of me and my husband fursona being together.
However, I will only do short comics that involve sex. Those are the type that he looks forward to. Not a manga like story that comes in volumes. So, I will do more fursona and other pictures. Depends on my mood though. Sorry for the inconvience and the delay of my comic. So, don't expect a page or so.
July 2016 Update
Posted 9 years agoConsider this a very early update for July.
1. I'm gonna be dogsitting for two weeks. Meaning that I won't be drawing as much since I'm gonna be staying at least 5 nights over at the house. But on the weekend, I'm gonna be home and start drawing my ass off. I know I've been slow but I've been quite distracted. With Warframe and Sailor Moon Drops. Damn it! I really need to prioritize myself and put drawings first before anything else. But anyway, I don't know when I'll start but I know its going to be in July. I'm still waiting on the details of that.
2. I'm gonna put the comic on hold unless I find a way to input my work into the drawings that I've been working on. I've been wanting to start that comic for a while but I came to an immediate hault with the financial monster. Yup, I'm starting to slack on that department with surprise withdraws when it comes to bills. But I'm still drawing other things. Which leads me to number three of my update...
3. I'm gonna be streaming tomorrow. What I'm gonna draw. Well, not sure. Maybe something pokemon related, drawing my favorite characters, including Sonic and maybe Mass Effect characters. Or something from an anime. I will let you all know when I'll start.
4. If you been liking my artwork and would want your picture drawn out. I don't mind taking request. I really want to grow as an artist and be able to support myself. If I have a decent following, I'll start patreon and will get started on taking donations so you can help me out with living expense. Its hard to find a job here and applying different places and waiting for a call back or calling them up is a hassle. I appreciate your support. But I will not start the commission/patreon yet. I have very low following at the moment.
5. I will start a twitter, tumblr, and instagram account. The more I expand the better chance of me having a bigger following. I will be more active with my artwork than ever before. This will give me better practice the more I draw. So, spread the word if you can and support me so that way I can grow into a better artist.
I would like to thank you all for the fav/watch since I started to upload pictures. Love you all. And thank you.
1. I'm gonna be dogsitting for two weeks. Meaning that I won't be drawing as much since I'm gonna be staying at least 5 nights over at the house. But on the weekend, I'm gonna be home and start drawing my ass off. I know I've been slow but I've been quite distracted. With Warframe and Sailor Moon Drops. Damn it! I really need to prioritize myself and put drawings first before anything else. But anyway, I don't know when I'll start but I know its going to be in July. I'm still waiting on the details of that.
2. I'm gonna put the comic on hold unless I find a way to input my work into the drawings that I've been working on. I've been wanting to start that comic for a while but I came to an immediate hault with the financial monster. Yup, I'm starting to slack on that department with surprise withdraws when it comes to bills. But I'm still drawing other things. Which leads me to number three of my update...
3. I'm gonna be streaming tomorrow. What I'm gonna draw. Well, not sure. Maybe something pokemon related, drawing my favorite characters, including Sonic and maybe Mass Effect characters. Or something from an anime. I will let you all know when I'll start.
4. If you been liking my artwork and would want your picture drawn out. I don't mind taking request. I really want to grow as an artist and be able to support myself. If I have a decent following, I'll start patreon and will get started on taking donations so you can help me out with living expense. Its hard to find a job here and applying different places and waiting for a call back or calling them up is a hassle. I appreciate your support. But I will not start the commission/patreon yet. I have very low following at the moment.
5. I will start a twitter, tumblr, and instagram account. The more I expand the better chance of me having a bigger following. I will be more active with my artwork than ever before. This will give me better practice the more I draw. So, spread the word if you can and support me so that way I can grow into a better artist.
I would like to thank you all for the fav/watch since I started to upload pictures. Love you all. And thank you.
Wahoo!
Posted 9 years agoAfter 5 long months, I finally got done with the comic. It was a birthday gift for a friend of mine. But alot has happened in the past 5 months. Moving into a new home, settling in, paying bills, and not having the drive to draw. The motivation was really low and I never find any interest for it. Until, I went and saw Zootopia. That movie lifted my spirits and I was motivated again. So, as you can see, I've been drawing and being active on FA and DA.
Now on with the topic at hand.
Q: Will I do another comic after being on hiatus for so long?
A: Yes. But I won't be taking request because I have big plans for my fursona and my husband's fursona. Feeling motivated I wanted to do a comic about the two.
Q: Will I do comics on the side that isn't involve my characters?
A: Maybe. Depends on my mood. More than likely, when Pokemon Sun and Moon comes out. I'll do a comic about that. And yes, my Rowlet will be the center of attention. Once I see the line of pokemon that they got and what pokemon I get. It will be something that will help me diverse a little.
As far as comics, go. I'm just doing random pictures that I feel like doing. Maybe a fanart of my favorite artist or doing more shading practice and other things. I might go to Weasyl just in case this website started to go down again. But I'm mostly active on DA. Its the same name but with the 85 at the end since I fucked up the other one. So, catch ya later ninjas!
Now on with the topic at hand.
Q: Will I do another comic after being on hiatus for so long?
A: Yes. But I won't be taking request because I have big plans for my fursona and my husband's fursona. Feeling motivated I wanted to do a comic about the two.
Q: Will I do comics on the side that isn't involve my characters?
A: Maybe. Depends on my mood. More than likely, when Pokemon Sun and Moon comes out. I'll do a comic about that. And yes, my Rowlet will be the center of attention. Once I see the line of pokemon that they got and what pokemon I get. It will be something that will help me diverse a little.
As far as comics, go. I'm just doing random pictures that I feel like doing. Maybe a fanart of my favorite artist or doing more shading practice and other things. I might go to Weasyl just in case this website started to go down again. But I'm mostly active on DA. Its the same name but with the 85 at the end since I fucked up the other one. So, catch ya later ninjas!
Comic Continuation/Future Drawings
Posted 9 years agoIts been a while since I uploaded anything that is related to the comic that I was working on. To be honest with ya, I've been on DeviantArt. I was inspired to draw Mystery Skulls based on the video I was watching featuring a new song. Been quite hooked on it really. Plus, I've been busy playing the new Ratchet and Clank game and Final Fantasy X/X-2 Remastered version. After finishing working on the projects for DA, I decided to hop back into the comic that I've been neglecting. Oh, I won't upload the pages on certain days. Once I'm done with the comic, I will upload them all at once. Its kinda my way of saying, ' Sorry for the long wait. Here's the finished comic pages that should've been done ages ago.'
So, be patient with me. I'm thinking about doing a comic series based on me and my husband's fursona. I don't know. Maybe a pokemon comic. Will see. Might wait til Pokemon Sun and Moon comes out. Gotta save up for a DS, LOL. But anyway expect more random pictures uploaded and the finishes pages.
So, be patient with me. I'm thinking about doing a comic series based on me and my husband's fursona. I don't know. Maybe a pokemon comic. Will see. Might wait til Pokemon Sun and Moon comes out. Gotta save up for a DS, LOL. But anyway expect more random pictures uploaded and the finishes pages.
Haven't Wrote In A While
Posted 9 years agoWell, I guess the last journal I made was 5 months ago, when I moved out of my mother's house. I've been pretty much been busy with things. I just been highly active on drawing and playing SWTOR. I mean with Knights Of The Fallen Empire came out with each chapter every month, its been exciting and fun. I just been pretty much focus on other things in RL. Bills, food shopping, cleaning the usual.
*sigh* I've been thinking about going back to Second Life to be a honey badger, but I got to buy the mod kit and the avatar in order for me to be one. I think I have clothes for my honey badger that I usually buy for my Kemono or that other avatar I can't think of. But at the same time, I've been dreading on the idea on returning to it. Don't get me wrong, I love furries but the thing I worried about is being IMed immediately as soon I'm online. I left the box unchecked to show my friend's that I'm online. To add to that note, I'm constantly gonna get nagged by virtual dicks flailing about whenever I'm in a mood to sit n chat with my friends. Not to be a commendable sex object whenever I'm trying to be normal. Sure, I will tell them off, but I'll be boring because I'm not going to be the fun sexual gal that they adore so much. I just want to talk about random shit.
Well, I know for a fact I'm boring to talk to. Hell, take my husband for example. He doesn't even continue the conversation whenever I wanted to talk. I pissed him off talking about a game. In a Phoenix Wright game, there's a scene where the brother has a lil brother who is brain dead at the hospital. Letting him be hospitalized knowing for the fact that his brother will not come out of a coma due to the incident that happen in the circus. I feel that the more I talk the less likely the conversation is not gonna go nowhere. Which is why, I suck at starting conversation. Most of the things I say never goes anywhere. I just state my opinion or statement on something I just watch and just move on. I feel that my husband is getting bored of me because I'm not interesting to talk to. At times, I feel alone.
Your probably wondering, ' Don't you have friends to talk to? Do you have a skype account? Do you join chat websites or roleplay with someone?'
I do. But most of the friends I made are highly busy with things. Never pay attention or bother to continue the conversation when I speak up. No one plays the game I play. They rp whenever I'm not in a mood and often times forget. Other's clinged to me like I'm some live sex object for them to play with. I don't mind friends with benefits, but I like to be treated like a person afterwards and not a mindless sex drone. Plus, I just feel mostly ignored and would end up listening to conversation anyway. It got to the point where I listen the most and not say nothing. Just a subtle response of , '' Mmhm '' and '' Nah uh.'' or my infamous, ' Hmmm' replies.
Oh, expect more artwork and the continuation of the comic that I'm slowly working on and surely neglecting to finish. That's all.
*sigh* I've been thinking about going back to Second Life to be a honey badger, but I got to buy the mod kit and the avatar in order for me to be one. I think I have clothes for my honey badger that I usually buy for my Kemono or that other avatar I can't think of. But at the same time, I've been dreading on the idea on returning to it. Don't get me wrong, I love furries but the thing I worried about is being IMed immediately as soon I'm online. I left the box unchecked to show my friend's that I'm online. To add to that note, I'm constantly gonna get nagged by virtual dicks flailing about whenever I'm in a mood to sit n chat with my friends. Not to be a commendable sex object whenever I'm trying to be normal. Sure, I will tell them off, but I'll be boring because I'm not going to be the fun sexual gal that they adore so much. I just want to talk about random shit.
Well, I know for a fact I'm boring to talk to. Hell, take my husband for example. He doesn't even continue the conversation whenever I wanted to talk. I pissed him off talking about a game. In a Phoenix Wright game, there's a scene where the brother has a lil brother who is brain dead at the hospital. Letting him be hospitalized knowing for the fact that his brother will not come out of a coma due to the incident that happen in the circus. I feel that the more I talk the less likely the conversation is not gonna go nowhere. Which is why, I suck at starting conversation. Most of the things I say never goes anywhere. I just state my opinion or statement on something I just watch and just move on. I feel that my husband is getting bored of me because I'm not interesting to talk to. At times, I feel alone.
Your probably wondering, ' Don't you have friends to talk to? Do you have a skype account? Do you join chat websites or roleplay with someone?'
I do. But most of the friends I made are highly busy with things. Never pay attention or bother to continue the conversation when I speak up. No one plays the game I play. They rp whenever I'm not in a mood and often times forget. Other's clinged to me like I'm some live sex object for them to play with. I don't mind friends with benefits, but I like to be treated like a person afterwards and not a mindless sex drone. Plus, I just feel mostly ignored and would end up listening to conversation anyway. It got to the point where I listen the most and not say nothing. Just a subtle response of , '' Mmhm '' and '' Nah uh.'' or my infamous, ' Hmmm' replies.
Oh, expect more artwork and the continuation of the comic that I'm slowly working on and surely neglecting to finish. That's all.
Finally Moved In
Posted 10 years agoYup. Finally moved in. I still got some cleaning to do. But I like to take my time since I've been working nonstop to get the home settle and make it feel like its ours. So, now that I got the major work done. I can focus on drawing more and perhaps work on my Gunslinger or whatever since my husband got the game Fallout 4. So, he's going to be doing that soon. Oh now that the work is slowing down to a halt, I think about doing a Let's Play for fun. I don't know, its still up in the air. Its going to be a cold winter. Saving up a little bit so I can get the heat in the home. Which is the next thing on the list now that I know what piece to get to have the AC working for the winter. Well, that's about it. :)
Won't be Online For A While
Posted 10 years agoTomorrow is going to be a busy day. I'm gonna be taking care alot of business to get things situated. Getting ready for my moving day. So, I got alot of stuff to pack. So, Saturday will be the moving day. I don't know when I'll have internet. But I'm guessing its between Monday or Tuesday. Also, settling down and rearranging the home to me and my husband's liking. So, I got my work cut out for. Hopefully, I won't be dogsitting for long and I won't have to do that for a good long ass while. I really need to start looking for job. It would feel so good having a home of my own. Well, I'll see ya'll later.
Good news for a change...
Posted 10 years agoHow often do I get good news?
Well, just of today....I'M MOVING! Yup, found a place. My step brother is selling his trailer home. Once he get it all fixed up. It will be ready for me and Bradly. I'm so happy that I'm going to get a place of my own. I guess I am going to move out after all. Wish me luck guys. I will be in touch soon.
Well, just of today....I'M MOVING! Yup, found a place. My step brother is selling his trailer home. Once he get it all fixed up. It will be ready for me and Bradly. I'm so happy that I'm going to get a place of my own. I guess I am going to move out after all. Wish me luck guys. I will be in touch soon.
Losing Interest in Certain Games
Posted 10 years agoFinding myself not in a mood to play Warframe. Its alot of fun to play with others or in a clan. But when it comes to playing by yourself, even when your bored, the interest of the game doesn't keep me entertain long enough. Its the same repetitive content that you get every time you play the game. Sure its awesome to get new prime weapons, warframe, and a kubrow. But getting it is a pain in the butt and you often time play it for ours before you run out of keys. The random system will go against you most of the time before you get what you want. Sometimes you get repeated items that you obtain like 5 keys ago. In the meantime, I'm going to try the Star Wars Battlefront Beta version of the game on the PS4. If my interest of Warframe doesn't keep me hype like it used to than I won't play Warframe ever again. I get too bored so easily. I play SWTOR now and that's a MMO game. But I play it with my husband. I'm starting to feel the same way about TERA. I don't know, I just feel that friends that I know have it but never suggest we play together. Plus, I feel I've done enough TERA gameplay to keep me off of it. So, let's see if I still like playing Warframe. If not, than I cherished the good memories that I have with friends that I played with.
Changes And Progress
Posted 10 years agoWow. its been 7 months since I posted a journal. And the last thing I uploaded was a comic for a friend of mine from 3 months ago. Been busy, distracted, procrastinating, etc.
Ever since I lost my job a few months back, I've been slacking off and been occupied with other things so that I won't be depressed throughout the whole year. Talking to friends on second life and skype. Making friends on my own turned into a struggle for me to even converse. Ever since I started to type or speak I don't make sense. Anything I say is cryptic and hard to decipher. So, I stay quiet and tag along with other people in a group while I listen and say a few confirmations like, ' yeah'. And lately, I feel when I wanted to speak or start a conversation it never continues. I waited minutes and hours on end for any response to what I started. And than when its time for me to leave, they decided to say something that isn't relevant to what I was talking about. Its like my whole time spending with people was a waste and than I feel that their just there to be there as company. Another thing I like to add, is when I do something that I feel like doing, I get no respond or attention. Often times, they do other things and not noticed that I'm there. I would talk for hours and yet no attention will be noticed from the group cuz their busy doing other things like watching vids on youtube or facebook, playing games, and fixing their avatars. So, when I do something else cuz of the lack of attention and communication I get the infamous comment, ' And everyone got quiet.'
I would say, ' Cuz no one don't want to talk apparently' and than a fight rose cuz the lack of talking. Which is why I left the group in a first place cuz I don't want to be around people that would just flat out ignores you while their doing something else on their damn computers. What's the point of being in a group if your not saying anything to each other and your attention is on something else. ADD much? Another thing that I like to clarify is that I'm not being ungrateful. I appreciate all the time that I had with the friends I made thus far during my times when I have my lows. Plus, most of the friends that I hung with have that I don't. And that's a job. Which is why I won't be around people cuz I feel I'm just being a nuisance because all I want is to be around them. Which is why I'm cutting ties to everyone on Second Life and Skype because I hate when someone mentioned about liking something and than saying that I know your kinks and that you didn't have enough, ' I just feel that's all I am to my friends.' A attention sexual whore
I'm surrounded by bad influence and its time that I change myself into a better person. Not to act like a total nympho when I'm around people. I wanted to have a normal group of friends that doesn't require benefits. It appears I attract the wrong people. I feel I'll never amount to anything but that, so I'm going to do something about that. I'm going to find a job as soon I'm done house/dogsitting, cleaning, and taking care of my dog. I'm slowly losing my sanity since I could never get anyone to reply to me when I send a message. It got to the point where I'm talking to myself when picking up my husband from work. Yeah, its that bad. I need to get out of the house and do productive work and do more drawings and not be lazy or coming up with excuse after excuse to cover the fact that I have no motivation and being lazy.
1. Get a Job
I'll worry about getting my own place later. At the moment, I want to work on me, get back into drawing again. Never get distracted by Second Life or the questionable friends that I've talked to over the past months. I cherished the awesome memories that I have with the people that I hang with. But it looks like, RL is our main priority and making friends on the internet is a minority of our daily lives. So, expect more drawings Friday to be uploaded cuz I'm gonna go full throttle and getting my mojo back.
I will have games that I can play to take a break from when my brain is fried from the overloading ideas I'm getting.
I will note the projects that I'm going to be doing in my profile and maybe add a bit of bio of my new fursona. That's pretty much it
Ever since I lost my job a few months back, I've been slacking off and been occupied with other things so that I won't be depressed throughout the whole year. Talking to friends on second life and skype. Making friends on my own turned into a struggle for me to even converse. Ever since I started to type or speak I don't make sense. Anything I say is cryptic and hard to decipher. So, I stay quiet and tag along with other people in a group while I listen and say a few confirmations like, ' yeah'. And lately, I feel when I wanted to speak or start a conversation it never continues. I waited minutes and hours on end for any response to what I started. And than when its time for me to leave, they decided to say something that isn't relevant to what I was talking about. Its like my whole time spending with people was a waste and than I feel that their just there to be there as company. Another thing I like to add, is when I do something that I feel like doing, I get no respond or attention. Often times, they do other things and not noticed that I'm there. I would talk for hours and yet no attention will be noticed from the group cuz their busy doing other things like watching vids on youtube or facebook, playing games, and fixing their avatars. So, when I do something else cuz of the lack of attention and communication I get the infamous comment, ' And everyone got quiet.'
I would say, ' Cuz no one don't want to talk apparently' and than a fight rose cuz the lack of talking. Which is why I left the group in a first place cuz I don't want to be around people that would just flat out ignores you while their doing something else on their damn computers. What's the point of being in a group if your not saying anything to each other and your attention is on something else. ADD much? Another thing that I like to clarify is that I'm not being ungrateful. I appreciate all the time that I had with the friends I made thus far during my times when I have my lows. Plus, most of the friends that I hung with have that I don't. And that's a job. Which is why I won't be around people cuz I feel I'm just being a nuisance because all I want is to be around them. Which is why I'm cutting ties to everyone on Second Life and Skype because I hate when someone mentioned about liking something and than saying that I know your kinks and that you didn't have enough, ' I just feel that's all I am to my friends.' A attention sexual whore
I'm surrounded by bad influence and its time that I change myself into a better person. Not to act like a total nympho when I'm around people. I wanted to have a normal group of friends that doesn't require benefits. It appears I attract the wrong people. I feel I'll never amount to anything but that, so I'm going to do something about that. I'm going to find a job as soon I'm done house/dogsitting, cleaning, and taking care of my dog. I'm slowly losing my sanity since I could never get anyone to reply to me when I send a message. It got to the point where I'm talking to myself when picking up my husband from work. Yeah, its that bad. I need to get out of the house and do productive work and do more drawings and not be lazy or coming up with excuse after excuse to cover the fact that I have no motivation and being lazy.
1. Get a Job
I'll worry about getting my own place later. At the moment, I want to work on me, get back into drawing again. Never get distracted by Second Life or the questionable friends that I've talked to over the past months. I cherished the awesome memories that I have with the people that I hang with. But it looks like, RL is our main priority and making friends on the internet is a minority of our daily lives. So, expect more drawings Friday to be uploaded cuz I'm gonna go full throttle and getting my mojo back.
I will have games that I can play to take a break from when my brain is fried from the overloading ideas I'm getting.
I will note the projects that I'm going to be doing in my profile and maybe add a bit of bio of my new fursona. That's pretty much it
Slow Progress
Posted 10 years agoAlot has changed since the new year has started. I've been pretty distracted with games. Mainly, Warframe and SWTOR. Playing games with my husband been so much fun. But I've been dealing with things in RL that really made an impact in my life. My father passed away two weeks ago, and its been pretty hard for me to be in any mood. My artwork came to a sudden halt, its like I lost all motivation to continue. Even when I'm in a mood I couldn't get myself into drawing anything that comes to mind. I feel that I'm going to draw on paper instead of the computer for only my viewing pleasure when I want something to read or something that my husband could read. It will be something I do in my spare time when things are slow at work or when I'm waiting for things to download. Also, I have a job working at Bubble Tea Express, a tea cafe that sells drinks and side snacks. I love the job and its alot of a fun learning new things that I never done before. I know in weeks or months time I will get the hang of it and will get the drinks and the cashier down packed. Since its the winter business has been pretty slow so I've been catching up on my reading. Decided that I'm gonna be learning japanese soon and would love to speak the language from time to time. Who knows, I might come back to upload pictures on DeviantArt, FurAffinity, or Inkbunny. But in the mean time, I'm gonna be busy with things in RL. Helping my mother paying the bills as well as mine now that I got a job. Hopefully, I'll be back soon to maybe continue the Mass Effect comic or draw something random that pops into my head. Only time will tell.