well.. I hoped to have more to upload now, but sadly my inspiration has been all over the place.
so only got one present done for christmas.

oh, well.. always next year.

anyway, got older and still not wiser.
hope you guys get a good one!

what species would he be?

a cat?
some kind of herbivore?
a dragon, like in draconics?

please note this is all just a brainstorm. Fairlyn is just fine the way he is.. no need to change him up at all.
I'm just wondering because I'm apparently on the autistic spectre and I heard people that has that is like a cat in a world of dogs.
so.. any thoughts?

STILL trying to get others to watch love, death and robots so I have someone to talk about that show with..
so far I haven't succeeded too much.

we're entering spring, which I am happy for..
just these few weeks are the worst. too hot to keep the jacket on, but still too cold to take it off, so I get the option of being either sweaty and miserable, or cold and miserable. no in between.
and the changing temperatuyre, as always, has a way of zapping my energy so I get even less written adn drawn than usual..
impressive I know.. to think I can write EVEN LESS than I do already.
impressive, but it happens.

and in regards to writing..
still working on it..
had a few ideas fall through and just not being to my muse's standards..
still hoping and waiting for that one idea rto hit home so I can just write it all the way I used to.. this is rather annoying.
and I got one request on the writer's black too. I haven't forgotten about your request Fawx. my muse just seem to dislike that idea for some reason, sorry.

I have been doing the 'draw daily' challenge for myself since new years, or just before. it's going nicely.
I just don't have a scanner, so no showing you guys (the 1 or 2 that cares) my pictures.

and last, I stubled across a picrture of a protogen, anyone else seen those, they look neat.
https://runesfurryblog.wordpress.co.....togen-species/
https://www.primaproto.com/
tempted to make a common one, or ask someone to make me one/trade for one.
if anyone has any thought.

either way, sorry for the ramble, and I hope people read it, if not comment.

a new netflix series, anyone else watching them?
many of them are brutal, just as a heads up.

but anyone else seen the one called good hunting?
it's one of those I'd like to have a chat about some time..
especially the transformation at the end..
then again.. considering what she is.. of course I'd appreciate seeing that.

do you feel my characters are carbon copies of eachother?
I don't, but I had someone imform me out of the blue that they all are and I really want a third or fourth opinion.

I just finished the last request I got. (I got a few offers of characters i'm still sorting through.)
it's with the one that requested it.
and i'm not sure what to write, so..
anyone want a story?

and accepting things too.
accepting that it's ok to have a bad day and tell others about it.
it's ok to open up and tell others about my problems. it's ok not to have all the answers.
It's ok to need help, no matter how hard it is for me to open up about it. sometimes having someone listening is enough.

I'm honestly terrible at talking about myself.
and most of my friends usually like talking about ther own problems, which gives me somethig to latch on to in order to just push my own issues away.
 bobbybalon is the only one that said 'no, we're focusing on you now.' when I tried to worm my way out of facing myself and focus on him instead.
I am honestly very thankful for that one.

I probably need to do some soul searching at some point.
and try to accept I am fine the way I am. I am just fine, I'm as good as everyone else.
just fine. The way the way I need to be.
I am me, that's all I need to be.

It's hard, but I am still trying to accepting that I am fine.


Fairlyn out.

I'm needing a break from my writing block when tackling Lost in Space and longer serialized stories in general.
so.. anyone got any ideas and preferably characters I can borrow too?

anyone want sex or unbirth with Fair?
there were a period wheree I'd get notes out of the blue asking if their femae sona/character coudl carry him, but haven't gotten any in a good while.
so.. any takers?

transformations?
I'm been exploring and trying to explore how to do it in different ways so it's not always just by unbirth.
as seen in my Lost in Space series.
the different kinds are:

Robotic
get your consciousness uploaded into an android and get used to it.
there's the general and the specialized one.
if someone picks the specialized one, please tell me what you want to be specialized for.. be it vore or snuggles or heavy work or something different?
there's also the sex bot specialization I still have no idea what actually is, other than self cleaning, more stamina and something to make it easier to get in the mood a d stay there.
other than the self cleaning part, that's all mental stuff. so.. any suggestions?
or takers?

Angelic/Divine
get a blessing from your chosen goddess.
includes a golden glow, a halo, a pair of feathery wings, glowing markings (angelic)
and a flaming sword if you're lucky.
can just be one or two so you'd end up with wings and a halo, or the halo and some glowing markings or something.
we'll figure out what else comes afterwards, if anyone picks this.

Supernatural.
Fairies and kitsunes and other supernatural creatures too.
give yourself to Darkie (for the duration of the transformation and to right after. it's needed to make the transformation stick.)
get cocooned up and break out of the chrysalis as a beautiful butterfly.
get imbued/transformed and learn how to properly use your powers.
butterfly wings, illusions and a more wilder side is what this leads to.
green and brown colors.

demonic.
succubus, naga, hellhound.
batlike wings, horns, and a taste for warm places and spicy foods.
transformation via unbirth. and then either pop out as a demon after a while. or get the full tour and pop out with a few sisters that looks closer to you. (haven't finished writing out this variant yet.) and if you don't want unbirth then you cna always get 'corrupted' by Ruby or her matron, Naga.

Pokemon.
because who doesn't love a ninetales.
feel free to pick from.. how many is there again? 800 and something?
anthro, or feral.
by suit, potion or maybe my feral ninetales pokesona can get another pokemon? (I need to pick that one up again..)
anyway, I'd love to turn all of my watching into a bunch of ninetales, a good mix of anthro and fewrals, but all female.
(why yes, Ninetales is my favorite for a good reason. I adore her and all variations of her)

and dragons.
I am offering it up as a unbirth egg, get laid and hatch.
and out pops a dragon.
after someone helps me design and name one matron mother/queen dragon and a few of her brood. the ones I tried myself I really wasn't feeling 'real' to me and I need to go back to the table with them.
actually.. give me a character and I'll turn them dragon and make her a part of my expanded crew. just an offer.




before/after
before
want to have a chat with Riannah about kinkiness while she leads you down adn drops you in Naga's care to get turned demoness?
a chat with Magicka about life here in general beofre volunteering for something for Darkie?
have a chat with Flare about fair's favorites or how to best tease Riannah or?

after
wrestle with Ruby while getting used to being a succubus?
settle in on Magicka's muzzle in your now much smaller fairy form and resume your chatting?
wrestle Fair down on his back before getting in on top and see how long your new body can handle sex?
ask Magicka aboiut getting a room because you want to explore the clan home a few days longer, or just want to see if this lifestyle is for you.
or you adore one of my characters and want to try for roomie status with her. (might not work out.)



or just normal Tf's..
like suits.
visit 'Ye Olde Costume Shoppe' and pick up a suit.
or drop by alchemy for a potion and see what happens to it.
I also got a different idea for suits i'm working on... anyone feel like picking a pokemon and try out the other kind of suit TF's for pokemon?



so, any takers or ideas or something?

still waiting for that +1 wis to kick in.

planning on a quiet day with family and some good food.
and just expecting/hoping for a few well wishes from here.

in case you celebrate it.
and if you don't.. then enjoy the year end aroudn family and friends.
or just enjoy yourself in a way you enjoy.

Fairlyn

I'm still here, still alive.
my muse seem to be on extended leave tho.

and in betwene having to have a tooth surgically removed, hed to get the darn thing cut to pieces beofre it coudl get removed properly, and the heat here.
I am feeling rather drained too.

so yeah, not dead, just lacking in inspiration.

one year older and still not too smart..
it was yesterday, but I was busy with other stuff and wasted from work.

but at least I am in a better spot this year than I was last year.

and no, i'm not expecting anythgign but a few congratulations.
let's see if I get more than 3.

sorry for not having been as active on here as I wanted to be.
but real life had a way of getting really in the way this year.
next year has to go better than this year.

anyway, merry christmas, happy new year and so on.
enjoy time with your loved ones.

same name on skype, telegram as I got here.
anyone interested?

my life just keeps getting in the way.

and I keep getting distracted.

and the chapter is growing longer and longer and there's still more I want to fold into it too..
currently 24 pages and still growing.
and I remember when I was impressed that I could write 6 to 8 pages per chapter in the earlier chapters..



and lately I've been messing around with miniature painting and landscape building.
it is kinda fun.
but I am still writing.

had a chat/impromptu RP session with  BobbyBalon where he helped me test out a few ideas this morning.

and I am just still wondering.
one of the things I am wondering about currently is a name for a new gathering place for specific anthros with specific kinks.
the idea is of longer duration stay anda TF's and so on included.

I mean, I figure one would need at least a few changed for a 3+ month long stay in someone else..
be it one's womb, belly or sack or somewhere else..

It should be driven by a need/want to protect/care/seek warmth and a place to lay low.
warmth/protection and so on.. fully willing for both partners.


I hope I am making myself clear, but I am typing it out that badly because I feel I'm part of the 3% that actually sees vore as something that can be warm and passionate whereas the other 97% want to play out what they sees on animal planet.. (before anyone says anything, I know most of what goes on there would be hard vore, but there are snakes on there too, I'm sure.)


the idea of the place is you come in, fill out a questionaire/have a chat with one of the ones running the place.
you'd get assigned a partner and the two of you would spend a few hours chatting and getting to know each other intimately.
and then you'd both talk and agree on what is goign to happen and who goes in who, and where too.

she takes the potion and closes her eyes for a moment, feeling the transformation settling in in her body, getting ready to transform her once she's in place.
quyickly guiding you down on all 4 and sliding her hands up up and start pushing her way into your sex, her hands sliding in and openig you up carefuly and she's already starting to feel slimmer, her bones getting a bit more rubbery., allowing her to push in quicker and easier than usual.

once she's curled up and pulling her legs in her legs and tail starts fusing slowly, slowly turning into a serpentine tail. Just without any scales but instead skin.
her fur fusing into her skin, getting it rubbery with a slight gooey layer on top of it.
her eyes growing bigger, rounder with her eyelids closing and turning opaque, and with a slight glow coming to her eyes.
and last she start shrinking down.
Until you're sitting and admiring a 2 to 3 month belly. big enough to be there, yet not big enough that others cna tell if you're really pregnant or if you're just a bit too pudgy.



in short.
I want a place where one can drop by to find a partner for save and long term vore.
and I want to name it either:
Intimately Intimate.
or:
the Beauty Within.

any ideas/suggestions/things to ponder?

I want nothing more than to curl up in a dragon..
a bigger one with nice scales and give her a little bump in her belly.

am I the only one that gets that kind of urges all of a sudden?




posting it here because I haven't really gotten anyone I really feel I can talk about this stuff with..
they're either asleep, busy, working or very likely to start talking about their own kinks..
I still haven't quite figured out that last one.. what do I do when my partner want to do nothing but talk about himself?
this is not pointed at anyone in particular, just people in general.



Fairlyn out.

I got told a few days ago that skype both seem to delay my responses with up to 12 hour.
and also just doesn't bother to send them to me at all.

so i'm on Telegram for now.
giving it a try.

on there as Fairlyn.
Hoping to see you there.
My icon is that of an arctic fox.

I'm looking for an artist to draw a picture of Fairlyn.
not sure how much I wanna spend.

anyone got an artist they can recommend?


It's for an RP profile.
so yes, getting int RP'ing again.
or trying at least.

we were supposed to get someone out and set it up the 9th.
make sure it works and all that.

get a phonecall on the 8th.
they'll have to move it to the 19th because of an unforseen problem with.. yeah, not sure..


and today I just got told we got an Email.
they'll come by on the 12th july and set it up.
we'll get 10 Mbit down..
thing is, we were promised 20 mbit, at least.
neighbour has 30Mbit down..


and I was really looking forward to getting back online properly come monday.

I meant to have this written about 2 and a half week ago.
we moved out thursday.
and my internet decided to have a burp that wednesday.
the internet was supposed to have come up last friday, but I got told thursday afternoon that there was a problem and supplier would send out someone to look at it on the 19th.

I'm currently without a scanner.
the last win 10 update apparently made it freak out and I've been wanting a new one for a good while now.

I am writing a bit, or at least trying to.
moving in, getting situated and all that takes predecence for now.
just why I haven't been active for half a month.

I know I won't be getting any of either..
but still.. I can't help but wonder what it'd be like.. finding a note or shout leading to either..

just something I wonder about, but I know it won't happen.


maybe I should just offer a trade for it?

it's hard to find a new sona, let me tell you that guys..


and in regards with Fairlyn and everything..
I am not giving up on her, she'll stick around as my character.
and as to why I don't use her as a sona or just changes her into a sona.
- Fairlyn identifies as female. I've been seeing it happen obvet rhe last year, possibly more, and tried to ignore/roll with it, but I finally had to realize me and her, we weren't seeing eye to eye in who we were/are..
- there's a lot of emtional baggage with her.. at least one broken relationship. (might have been two or three, really not sure.. one of them lasted close to two years where Ihad realized about 6 months in it was a mistake, but I was weak and didn't want to deal with the fallout of a breakup.. the other two.. I'm atill not sure if they were relationships or not, bet I could have many long arguments about that, if we still spoke with eachother.)
- Fairlyn likes being a playful, a tease, showing off while not leading anywhere.. Like flirting and showing off just because she want to get complimented.
and some people just think to think that I show up as a female is a signal that they're going to get lucky and getting laid.. and then when Fairlyn start flirting too..
it has lead to almost getting he raped twice, sadly.. at the point where I had to get up and just leave the pc for a few hours because I didn't want to see the flashing messenger notice.
and one instance of playing.. I thought we were playing tag/racing eachother and I had Fair trip over a branch.. and then, out of the blue, for me at least, my RP partner just start mounting her..
- the times when I was playing as her I was just.. well, acting slightly more subdued and subbish than I really wanted to.. she/I didn't have the mental strangth to say no..
- we we've been together so long as she just started rubbing off of me.. and it got bad enough at times that it made me idly ponder if I was trans.. (that's the big reason I decided I needed a new sona.)

TL:DR.
I like playing a female character, and my sona now identifies as female.
but too many bad experiences soured playing females for me.



and on sonas:
there's the feral ninetales form my pokemon TF series..
I like him, he's dominant and fin to play as.
the bad:
it's a pokemon, and I'm not sure I ewant a pokemon as my 'main' sona
he's goign to turn everyone inot pokemon, one way or another.. (not bad, per se. I just doubrt darkie is goign to appreciate gettig turned into a Zorua, or a Ninetales.)
doesn't feel 'right' to me.
that and I just can't see how he'd fit into the clan without needing to rebuild it from scratch, which I am hesitant to do..

a wolf:
anthro, bigger and stronger, proud and loyal.
based on my brave new world storyline I never got off the ground.
Comes with an already started background and universe..
very suitable to the 'protector' role I usually do like.
the bad:
already got his own litthe group (I won't call it a clan, because it's more of an adventuring party.)
feels like the kind of guy that would take one partner, if even that or might just decide to stay friends for duty/honor.
doesn't feel like her has much interest in vore.

and an alternate for the wolf.
A sci fi world..
think shadowrun/bladerunner/Dystopian sci fi world with lots of neon signs.
would be with me as the wolf and Fairlyn as my roomie. witht he usual trouble..
the bad:
have to restart EVERYTHING. have to figure out where the different girls fit in and all that.. a whole load of work is goign to be in there..
I was running with it for a while.. but I don't think I really realized just how much work it is..

the symbiote thing: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/22773698/
very unique. Don't think I've seen anyone with a character, much less a sona, like that.
lack of fur/fat leads to rapid cooldown when outside the host.
the bad:
no idea how to interact with anyone like that..
woke up this morning and it just felt.. It just felt wrong..

those are the ones that just comes to mind at the moment..
I'm sure there are other things too..
I'll rewrite/update as I remember it.

the thing that happened between 5 and 7 weeks ago is..
I lost my sona.. me and Fair.. we just.. well, kinda outgrew eachother, I think.
Fair he/she identifies more as a female and me.. well. I identify as male..
so yeah, Fair's a character at the moment and i'm still trying to sort this thing out, and trying to get a feel for a new sona at the same time.

I'm still trying to figure out what to do with my writing during all this..
the main character just changed gender and dropped down to the supporting cast after all.

and pondering chatting and RP'ing too.
I mean the furries I talk likes nuzzles and giving random *hugs* and nuzzles and so on..
and RP.. We're furries for a reason.. I'm not sure anyone want to RP with a human, really?

I just.. yeah, what do I really do now?
any ideas/feedback/anything?



I got a few ideas I am rolling over in my head.
keep myself a human and try to build up a sci fi universe around all this..
many of my characters would fit right into a sci fi world.. I mean I got an android (Eve) a few aliens (Artemis, Syndra and so on.. thanks Cam.)
that and I do like sci fi too..

dig back into my pokemon TF story and keep writing it while trying to get a feel for ninetales as a sona.
just feral, but I doubt it'd do anything too bad.. not much of a size difference when it comes to unbirth, but still..

take another look at Brave New World.
change/tweak the Fairlyn in there into a potential sona.
I already got a little bit of an idea.. Arctic (white furred) wolf male warrior. fantasy styled, wearing leather armor, a sword and shield. more masculine than the old Fair.

and someone suggested I pick one of my girls as a 'main' one, not a sona per se.. just as someoen I cna have fun playing as and use to interact with others.
he suggested Darkie.

so yeah, just thinking and pondering.
and dropping an update in on it all..

I'll be back.
I'm just not sure then..


I just need time to sort things out after what just happened to me mentally..
nothing bad, I just need some time to look inward and focus on my own instead of worry and listen to others about their problems.
so yeah, I'm off.