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Chaotic Silence
Posted 2 years agoDon't worry, I already know that people could care less, but I knew how the previous journal would be interpereted by the two people who even glanced; how I come across as some lazy, entitled millennial who just wants allies, attention and affirmations... well, I don't.
When I brought up the idea of "attention" previously, I was specificially referring to the modern societal issue of people not caring for another human being unless they can benefit you somehow, via money, sex (if you both deem each other to be visually attractive), or a step up on the popularity social ladder where those who can move you up are more important than those who were with you before.
Making it relevant, I initially came back to the fandom specifically to allow people to say the quiet part about it without fear of consequences, and while I achieved some of that, I saw a good number of people who felt alone and distanced and just wanted to know what it was like to have friends again like they used to... well, so did I, and I offered. Sadly, just like in real-life, people are more inclined to seek validation form other sycophants and high-tiered allies rather than making the company of a friend, and hey, that's them.
Unfortunately that leaves me where I've been struggling for a long time (almost 29 years come March), just as I mentioned previously, I have no one else, I don't qualify to be anyone's friend or anything more, and as an extrovert it's especially difficult when you find no happiness by yourself or see any point in continuing on.
No one knows this, but years ago I actually did try kiling myself, and while God stepped in and saved my life by stopping it multiple times through literal miracles, I still discovered that those I left behind didn't know and didn't care while other people actually wanted me gone just because I didn't benefit their world or their lives.
Years later, little has changed, but I'm still suffering from the Loneliness Epidemic, and knowing that people continue to just avoid me because I'm not as beneficial as someone with the looks and paycheck of a celebrity even though those people don't really care much for them have brought me to a breaking point.
For my entire life, I've had to initiate almost every single conversation to anyone ever and remind people of commitments, and when I stopped, so did they. Conversations, promises and such spend years in waiting while I would actively see those people engaging in activities with others that they insisted they never desired.
I can't even get people to be honest when they don't want to have anything to do with me. It's hard enough trying to find anyone anymore willing to give you two sentences before leaving you.
And I'm not even begging for affirmations or validations or anything. I'm not one of the emotional weirdos who now make up the majority of the internet population. Just having good friends and people to hang out with is more than what I currently get and wanted for years, but with the dawn of the digital age and needing to meet requirements to do so as more genuine people meet folks they're happy with and move on with them, I'm left in the dust. Even one person being there would be something, but alas, my life has been trashed out as a group effort, even by me.
Once again I'm not asking for validation or anything, I only ever wanted friends and hopefully one day someone more; and yes, I've tried virtually everything that's been suggested, but it can't replace people and those that can involve them, they're just not there. Like I said, I don't meet the requirements to be worth anyone's time, whether it's for friendship, relationships or even a drink.
So, as much as I've been forced to try for years, I can't distract myself anymore, and I fail to see any happiness moving forward alone.
Thus I can't handle it anymore. You know how heartbreaking it is when: Someone says they're willing to be friends, but never talk or hang out with you?
When someone promises to hang out or game with you, and even years later never do, but show up in your notifications and feed hanging out with other people every day?
When someone says they want to get to know you, and then don't want to talk to you, then after you initiate numerous conversations they complain they don't know you?
When someone says they're not comfortable around strangers, or being close with new people, when simultaneously they'll be seen a couple days later getting sexual with random people?
When you try to find a topic for conversation, so you ask someone what they're interested in, they name ONLY two or three things, and you try talking about those but they don't like to talk much and don't even show much interest in those topics at all?
When someone says they feel alone and without anyone to talk to, and even saying they want a good friend, yet never want to let anyone in, opting into sycophancy with people who can benefit them via popularity, money or sex?
When you have no friends or relationships, so you're stuck with porn to get any amount of dopamine in your life, but then porn makes you depressed because you see people enjoying each other when you know for a fact that you'll never have anyone in your life willing to get happy nor comfortable enough around you to ever get to that point, despite so many other people enjoying that kind of stuff with others; be it friends, lovers, etc. that cannot be replicated by a prostitute which is constantly recommended to you?
When sex and the enjoyment of it is all around you, paraded, taunted, enjoyed frequently by everyone, but you will never take part, nor ever even be naked with anyone, yet those who refuse to be or even talk sexual with you are more than willing to take part in sexual enjoyment with strangers, friends, or even parties? On top of that, when it's a regular topic or activity of interest for that person, but they refuse to even talk about it with you, but you see them willing to get dirty with others, even if they're complete strangers and literally don't care about them besides getting in their bed? Simultaneously they can bring up about it, but the second that you do you're immediately branded both a creep and a loser?
When you have no friends, so people think you're a loser, which makes them not want to be your friend either?
When you're constantly initiating the conversations, then you quit to see if they'll start talking to you, but months later they never say a word?
When you match with someone online or on an app, having MANY interests in common, but all they're interested in are your looks or your income, then reject you because you don't have what they want?
When you talk to someone and get to know them very well, even minute details about them, their life or things they like in a way you'd want a bf or gf to, but they don't want to have anything to do with you, then you suddenly find out they're hooking up with (and in some cases engaged with) someone who's richer or more popular who barely knows or cares about them, within weeks of you knowing them?
When you spend your entire school life on the bottom of the popularity hierarchy and not allowed to have friends, and as an adult you don't meet the requirements to be someone's friend, so you spend your entire life alone?
When you're surrounded by introverts calling you dramatic for being depressed for having no one and nothing in your life, and even telling you it's better to be lonely?
When you've never gotten a single compliment in your entire life?
When people refuse to even look at you?
When you compliment someone and they see you as a creeper?
When you go to ask someone a question and they have to tell you they're married before even listening to you or caring about the question... meanwhile they're not even wearing a ring?
When the only friendly interactions you've had with people where behind the counter or at a restaurant?
When people don't think you're intelligent or credible because you're not popular, so will straight up ignore your advice and insult you?
When you try to make the effort to befriend someone and they tell you “I'm sure you'll meet someone?”
When you're outgoing and full of energy, yet are stuck at home all day by yourself with all that chaos swirling around in your head?
When you have no one to reach out to, so you become depressed, people see you're depressed and as a result they distance themselves from you because they think you have mental problems, causing you to become more depressed to the point of wanting this life to end?
When you actually do try ending your life, but fail and decide to go quiet and get help, but professional help just tells you that you're lonely, and weeks, months and years later those who last talked to you before you tried to end your life either don't seem phased at all, or even come off as happier without you and upset you're still alive?
When someone refuses to give you a chance at anything and then calls you lazy, resulting in you having nothing to fall back on and they blame you for that?
When instead of being your friend or engaging with you, someone keeps telling you to get a hobby, but when telling them that you get no enjoyment or fulfillment out of things when you're doing them for yourself, they simply just say “I don't know what to tell you then” and then continue engaging with other people?
When someone tells you to get into something, so you invest a lot of time and money doing so in hopes that they'll engage with you, but when you go back and try, they're not interested in that thing anymore?
When someone is willing to talk and engage with you, but as soon as they get attention from other people or start moving up the social hierarchy they leave you behind and refuse to hang out with you anymore?
When the only places you could escape to are unrecognizable, nearly void of fun, laughter and happiness except for a few happy people that are happy together and want nothing to do with you, while the rest are miserable and political?
When you actually try to kill yourself but fail, only to come back and realize that nobody missed you, nobody cared and some people would've been happier with you gone?
When people don't realize that some folks are just dealt a bad hand and their life doesn't suck "because they want it to?"
When people would rather lecture you instead of help or even just be there with you while they take solitude in their own comfortable people?
This sounds pointless since I didn't come back to the fandom to make friends because it's impossible to, and I know no one here will notice if I go quiet, and they don't care much anyway as I haven't been able to benefit their lives much, but I'm just at the end of my rope alone and drunk-venting to a virtual brick wall at this point.
It's hard enough to find reasons to keep going, but as an extrovert, without anyone with you, it's even harder and makes everything seem pointless when no matter what you do, you're alone and lost.
I don't want a life like that. I can't handle this anymore.
Alcohol is kicking in and I can't think of anything else.
Oh, and P.S. Dragoneer, you are not only despised among many O.G. furries more than Trump, but many see the things you've done and the positions you've chosen to take as the biggest causes leading to the collapse of the fandom over the years and the change in focus away from fun to politics, pandering and penises. Nobody cares for you except your minions, and many would like to see a whole new fandom made without the influences you brought onto this one.
When I brought up the idea of "attention" previously, I was specificially referring to the modern societal issue of people not caring for another human being unless they can benefit you somehow, via money, sex (if you both deem each other to be visually attractive), or a step up on the popularity social ladder where those who can move you up are more important than those who were with you before.
Making it relevant, I initially came back to the fandom specifically to allow people to say the quiet part about it without fear of consequences, and while I achieved some of that, I saw a good number of people who felt alone and distanced and just wanted to know what it was like to have friends again like they used to... well, so did I, and I offered. Sadly, just like in real-life, people are more inclined to seek validation form other sycophants and high-tiered allies rather than making the company of a friend, and hey, that's them.
Unfortunately that leaves me where I've been struggling for a long time (almost 29 years come March), just as I mentioned previously, I have no one else, I don't qualify to be anyone's friend or anything more, and as an extrovert it's especially difficult when you find no happiness by yourself or see any point in continuing on.
No one knows this, but years ago I actually did try kiling myself, and while God stepped in and saved my life by stopping it multiple times through literal miracles, I still discovered that those I left behind didn't know and didn't care while other people actually wanted me gone just because I didn't benefit their world or their lives.
Years later, little has changed, but I'm still suffering from the Loneliness Epidemic, and knowing that people continue to just avoid me because I'm not as beneficial as someone with the looks and paycheck of a celebrity even though those people don't really care much for them have brought me to a breaking point.
For my entire life, I've had to initiate almost every single conversation to anyone ever and remind people of commitments, and when I stopped, so did they. Conversations, promises and such spend years in waiting while I would actively see those people engaging in activities with others that they insisted they never desired.
I can't even get people to be honest when they don't want to have anything to do with me. It's hard enough trying to find anyone anymore willing to give you two sentences before leaving you.
And I'm not even begging for affirmations or validations or anything. I'm not one of the emotional weirdos who now make up the majority of the internet population. Just having good friends and people to hang out with is more than what I currently get and wanted for years, but with the dawn of the digital age and needing to meet requirements to do so as more genuine people meet folks they're happy with and move on with them, I'm left in the dust. Even one person being there would be something, but alas, my life has been trashed out as a group effort, even by me.
Once again I'm not asking for validation or anything, I only ever wanted friends and hopefully one day someone more; and yes, I've tried virtually everything that's been suggested, but it can't replace people and those that can involve them, they're just not there. Like I said, I don't meet the requirements to be worth anyone's time, whether it's for friendship, relationships or even a drink.
So, as much as I've been forced to try for years, I can't distract myself anymore, and I fail to see any happiness moving forward alone.
Thus I can't handle it anymore. You know how heartbreaking it is when: Someone says they're willing to be friends, but never talk or hang out with you?
When someone promises to hang out or game with you, and even years later never do, but show up in your notifications and feed hanging out with other people every day?
When someone says they want to get to know you, and then don't want to talk to you, then after you initiate numerous conversations they complain they don't know you?
When someone says they're not comfortable around strangers, or being close with new people, when simultaneously they'll be seen a couple days later getting sexual with random people?
When you try to find a topic for conversation, so you ask someone what they're interested in, they name ONLY two or three things, and you try talking about those but they don't like to talk much and don't even show much interest in those topics at all?
When someone says they feel alone and without anyone to talk to, and even saying they want a good friend, yet never want to let anyone in, opting into sycophancy with people who can benefit them via popularity, money or sex?
When you have no friends or relationships, so you're stuck with porn to get any amount of dopamine in your life, but then porn makes you depressed because you see people enjoying each other when you know for a fact that you'll never have anyone in your life willing to get happy nor comfortable enough around you to ever get to that point, despite so many other people enjoying that kind of stuff with others; be it friends, lovers, etc. that cannot be replicated by a prostitute which is constantly recommended to you?
When sex and the enjoyment of it is all around you, paraded, taunted, enjoyed frequently by everyone, but you will never take part, nor ever even be naked with anyone, yet those who refuse to be or even talk sexual with you are more than willing to take part in sexual enjoyment with strangers, friends, or even parties? On top of that, when it's a regular topic or activity of interest for that person, but they refuse to even talk about it with you, but you see them willing to get dirty with others, even if they're complete strangers and literally don't care about them besides getting in their bed? Simultaneously they can bring up about it, but the second that you do you're immediately branded both a creep and a loser?
When you have no friends, so people think you're a loser, which makes them not want to be your friend either?
When you're constantly initiating the conversations, then you quit to see if they'll start talking to you, but months later they never say a word?
When you match with someone online or on an app, having MANY interests in common, but all they're interested in are your looks or your income, then reject you because you don't have what they want?
When you talk to someone and get to know them very well, even minute details about them, their life or things they like in a way you'd want a bf or gf to, but they don't want to have anything to do with you, then you suddenly find out they're hooking up with (and in some cases engaged with) someone who's richer or more popular who barely knows or cares about them, within weeks of you knowing them?
When you spend your entire school life on the bottom of the popularity hierarchy and not allowed to have friends, and as an adult you don't meet the requirements to be someone's friend, so you spend your entire life alone?
When you're surrounded by introverts calling you dramatic for being depressed for having no one and nothing in your life, and even telling you it's better to be lonely?
When you've never gotten a single compliment in your entire life?
When people refuse to even look at you?
When you compliment someone and they see you as a creeper?
When you go to ask someone a question and they have to tell you they're married before even listening to you or caring about the question... meanwhile they're not even wearing a ring?
When the only friendly interactions you've had with people where behind the counter or at a restaurant?
When people don't think you're intelligent or credible because you're not popular, so will straight up ignore your advice and insult you?
When you try to make the effort to befriend someone and they tell you “I'm sure you'll meet someone?”
When you're outgoing and full of energy, yet are stuck at home all day by yourself with all that chaos swirling around in your head?
When you have no one to reach out to, so you become depressed, people see you're depressed and as a result they distance themselves from you because they think you have mental problems, causing you to become more depressed to the point of wanting this life to end?
When you actually do try ending your life, but fail and decide to go quiet and get help, but professional help just tells you that you're lonely, and weeks, months and years later those who last talked to you before you tried to end your life either don't seem phased at all, or even come off as happier without you and upset you're still alive?
When someone refuses to give you a chance at anything and then calls you lazy, resulting in you having nothing to fall back on and they blame you for that?
When instead of being your friend or engaging with you, someone keeps telling you to get a hobby, but when telling them that you get no enjoyment or fulfillment out of things when you're doing them for yourself, they simply just say “I don't know what to tell you then” and then continue engaging with other people?
When someone tells you to get into something, so you invest a lot of time and money doing so in hopes that they'll engage with you, but when you go back and try, they're not interested in that thing anymore?
When someone is willing to talk and engage with you, but as soon as they get attention from other people or start moving up the social hierarchy they leave you behind and refuse to hang out with you anymore?
When the only places you could escape to are unrecognizable, nearly void of fun, laughter and happiness except for a few happy people that are happy together and want nothing to do with you, while the rest are miserable and political?
When you actually try to kill yourself but fail, only to come back and realize that nobody missed you, nobody cared and some people would've been happier with you gone?
When people don't realize that some folks are just dealt a bad hand and their life doesn't suck "because they want it to?"
When people would rather lecture you instead of help or even just be there with you while they take solitude in their own comfortable people?
This sounds pointless since I didn't come back to the fandom to make friends because it's impossible to, and I know no one here will notice if I go quiet, and they don't care much anyway as I haven't been able to benefit their lives much, but I'm just at the end of my rope alone and drunk-venting to a virtual brick wall at this point.
It's hard enough to find reasons to keep going, but as an extrovert, without anyone with you, it's even harder and makes everything seem pointless when no matter what you do, you're alone and lost.
I don't want a life like that. I can't handle this anymore.
Alcohol is kicking in and I can't think of anything else.
Oh, and P.S. Dragoneer, you are not only despised among many O.G. furries more than Trump, but many see the things you've done and the positions you've chosen to take as the biggest causes leading to the collapse of the fandom over the years and the change in focus away from fun to politics, pandering and penises. Nobody cares for you except your minions, and many would like to see a whole new fandom made without the influences you brought onto this one.
Careless Whispers
Posted 2 years agoSo yeah, I know no one wants anything to do with me. I know I can't impress anyone enough to be even worthy of attention, and to those whom I try, they really don't want anything to do with me, not counting the constant rejection and lies. That's all I've seen my whole life, I'm not stupid.
With that said I also don't hide the fact that I don't have a friendly history with the furry fandom. In fact, I've never had one positive experience in it since I first started back in 2008. I've just had no other outlet in life for all this time, only coming back recently to try to help people since i had the time to do so. Even the whole Waagttail thing and all the people I've reached out to who really don't give a shit about anything, it was all just a distraction from everything that's been going on in my life recently, just one more thing I could try before just giving up on my life.
I'm not one of those people who are only crybabies for attention and try to play the Pity Olympics. I have my own fucked up life story, but have tried nonstop to move on. Unfortunately I just have nothing and no one to move on to anymore.
I'll spare the details cuz I know people don't like to read, and honestly I'm not worth enough for people to give a shit, so I'll just say that even when I'm sober and on medication, it can't combat loneliness and the depressing reality I face every day of people who actively don't want anything to do with me. Just the way things have always been, only becoming more difficult in the digital age, especially as an outgoing extrovert.
I anticipate getting to Christmas, but I'm tired of this life and I can't take it anymore. I just finally want peace.
Don't have anyone to say "goodbye" to, so I conclude this sleep-deprived ramble.
With that said I also don't hide the fact that I don't have a friendly history with the furry fandom. In fact, I've never had one positive experience in it since I first started back in 2008. I've just had no other outlet in life for all this time, only coming back recently to try to help people since i had the time to do so. Even the whole Waagttail thing and all the people I've reached out to who really don't give a shit about anything, it was all just a distraction from everything that's been going on in my life recently, just one more thing I could try before just giving up on my life.
I'm not one of those people who are only crybabies for attention and try to play the Pity Olympics. I have my own fucked up life story, but have tried nonstop to move on. Unfortunately I just have nothing and no one to move on to anymore.
I'll spare the details cuz I know people don't like to read, and honestly I'm not worth enough for people to give a shit, so I'll just say that even when I'm sober and on medication, it can't combat loneliness and the depressing reality I face every day of people who actively don't want anything to do with me. Just the way things have always been, only becoming more difficult in the digital age, especially as an outgoing extrovert.
I anticipate getting to Christmas, but I'm tired of this life and I can't take it anymore. I just finally want peace.
Don't have anyone to say "goodbye" to, so I conclude this sleep-deprived ramble.
Equine fursuits...
Posted 2 years ago...whenever they're in the closet, they get hung like a horse
Picking and Choosing
Posted 2 years agoSo aside from passing thoughts I've posted here and there, I haven't been active because while a few things have happened in my life the past few months...
...a lot hasn't, and I mean a lot really hasn't!
Of course right now I'm struggling to get over the flu, reached a new weight of 115.2lbs, having trouble landing a job thanks to the accusations from my other job (which I haven't found a lawyer for) and unable to get unemployment, having spiritual troubles that my mind is in too much of a fog anymore to put into words to pray, and struggling with a bit of recurring addiction which is influenced directly by what I'm about to get into.
Ever since I got let go from my job, in-between trying to find another one, I've been left primarily to myself and my thoughts for the past 3 1/2 months. As a very outgoing and social guy, not being able to interact with people becomes maddening real fast, even more when you have as little of a social life as I do and most people don't care for you unless you have money or can do things for them. Friends aren't quite what they used to be.
Even more annoying is how impossible it is to make new friends anymore. After talking with hundreds of people since I got let go AND finding things to bond over, you'd think that even one of them would want to at least want to better acquaint themselves or socialize outside of their inner circles. Plus I can't tell you how many times I've gotten the "We could be friends, but we need to get to know each other better." ...okay, so talk! If you don't want anything to do with me just say so! Don't just pull that line, get my hopes up and then do nothing, then have me constantly bother you for two words before you eventually find me annoying. WTF?!?!
I guarantee you if I had more money or popularity you'd be all up in my face (I've already had THAT proven more times than it should). How do people make friends anymore?
What's really concerning about it is this... of the people I've talked to, and a few I didn't get to, a lot of them needed a close friend in their lives. I remember mentioning in a previous journal how no one wants to talk to people anymore, but whenever they do, they pick and choose who they allow in. Well I'm sorry Karen, but life doesn't work like a Hallmark movie. You've passed up a lot of potentially loyal people because you want to either collect or fuck your way up the ladder, of which you'll never reach the top. Meanwhile people on lower steps are purging themselves from the internet and even killing themselves due to loneliness and stress that they can't handle alone.
And believe me, as many times as I've been told loneliness isn't a bad thing by self-entitled and emotional introverts (like most people on the internet) jealous of someone feeling more depression or pain than them. There's a reason suicide is the biggest killer of men under 50 and right now we're literally in the middle of what they're officially calling a "Loneliness Epidemic." The constant drinking and jerking off can't keep up the dopamine long enough.
So many people say they wish they had good friends, at least one friend they could trust, yadda yadda yadda, but are waiting for Prince Charming to come along on a beautiful white steed, even though they refuse to believe the ones they need aren't usually the ones they want. The more extroverted people are the same, only wanting other princes in their lives, not boring peasants. Sometimes that means replacing lower-tier friends with higher-tier ones, or just refusing lower-tier ones to begin with, and I hate to laugh when they're in trouble and their royalty doesn't help.
Then what happens? They start dropping like flies, one by one, off the internet, then off the real-life radar. People you once knew, people you needed, then you.
Then what happens when you need someone?
Has social media taught us that the only people that matter are the ones who boost our reputation, and thus our imaginary "value?"
Won't make any difference to me unless I win the lottery, since I'm not becoming a celebrity any time soon. In the meantime, I'll just be lonely.
Welp, I'm about to pass out.
...a lot hasn't, and I mean a lot really hasn't!
Of course right now I'm struggling to get over the flu, reached a new weight of 115.2lbs, having trouble landing a job thanks to the accusations from my other job (which I haven't found a lawyer for) and unable to get unemployment, having spiritual troubles that my mind is in too much of a fog anymore to put into words to pray, and struggling with a bit of recurring addiction which is influenced directly by what I'm about to get into.
Ever since I got let go from my job, in-between trying to find another one, I've been left primarily to myself and my thoughts for the past 3 1/2 months. As a very outgoing and social guy, not being able to interact with people becomes maddening real fast, even more when you have as little of a social life as I do and most people don't care for you unless you have money or can do things for them. Friends aren't quite what they used to be.
Even more annoying is how impossible it is to make new friends anymore. After talking with hundreds of people since I got let go AND finding things to bond over, you'd think that even one of them would want to at least want to better acquaint themselves or socialize outside of their inner circles. Plus I can't tell you how many times I've gotten the "We could be friends, but we need to get to know each other better." ...okay, so talk! If you don't want anything to do with me just say so! Don't just pull that line, get my hopes up and then do nothing, then have me constantly bother you for two words before you eventually find me annoying. WTF?!?!
I guarantee you if I had more money or popularity you'd be all up in my face (I've already had THAT proven more times than it should). How do people make friends anymore?
What's really concerning about it is this... of the people I've talked to, and a few I didn't get to, a lot of them needed a close friend in their lives. I remember mentioning in a previous journal how no one wants to talk to people anymore, but whenever they do, they pick and choose who they allow in. Well I'm sorry Karen, but life doesn't work like a Hallmark movie. You've passed up a lot of potentially loyal people because you want to either collect or fuck your way up the ladder, of which you'll never reach the top. Meanwhile people on lower steps are purging themselves from the internet and even killing themselves due to loneliness and stress that they can't handle alone.
And believe me, as many times as I've been told loneliness isn't a bad thing by self-entitled and emotional introverts (like most people on the internet) jealous of someone feeling more depression or pain than them. There's a reason suicide is the biggest killer of men under 50 and right now we're literally in the middle of what they're officially calling a "Loneliness Epidemic." The constant drinking and jerking off can't keep up the dopamine long enough.
So many people say they wish they had good friends, at least one friend they could trust, yadda yadda yadda, but are waiting for Prince Charming to come along on a beautiful white steed, even though they refuse to believe the ones they need aren't usually the ones they want. The more extroverted people are the same, only wanting other princes in their lives, not boring peasants. Sometimes that means replacing lower-tier friends with higher-tier ones, or just refusing lower-tier ones to begin with, and I hate to laugh when they're in trouble and their royalty doesn't help.
Then what happens? They start dropping like flies, one by one, off the internet, then off the real-life radar. People you once knew, people you needed, then you.
Then what happens when you need someone?
Has social media taught us that the only people that matter are the ones who boost our reputation, and thus our imaginary "value?"
Won't make any difference to me unless I win the lottery, since I'm not becoming a celebrity any time soon. In the meantime, I'll just be lonely.
Welp, I'm about to pass out.
The enemy of my enemy
Posted 2 years agoIt's a special kind of annoying when you take a problem that multiple people see eye to eye on, but after some disgreement in the past they see each other as enemies, and thus they can't come to an agreement to help each other out... or even TALK!
I've become acquainted with some of these "enemies" as well as their "enemies," after reaching out to so many people regarding problems within the furry fandom. Despite nearly everyone seeing eye-to-eye, those that were brave enough to speak to me still refuse to talk to others over differences in opinion from the past. When confronting them and offering to help bring them together over something completely unrelated (something that children can do) they still refuse, while telling me they want the others to apologize and to reach out first, but at the same time saying they'll still refuse to talk to or even forgive them.
You wanna know why the fandom is in the state it is right now? Because of childish behavior like that, from people of the generations who knew what it was like to fight with friends and get over it (in other words, should remember exactly how to remedy this pathetic issue).
I don't get pissed off by much, but these people want to keep complaining about how bad the fandom is and how terrible people are, while pulling this kind of behavior that's allowing infections to fester, it annoys me to no end. It's like two idiots in a rowboat stuck in the middle of a lake and complaining that they're stuck while refusing to pick up an oar because they don't like the other person, then continue to complain some more that they're stuck. Now imagine one of those giant viking ships with dozens of oar dudes who all hate each other because of some stupid and petty arguments in the past, and then imagine their ship is under attack and sinking, so they complain about that while simultaneously complaining that no one else is getting them the heck outta Dodge.
"I don't like them, so I want them to apologize to me but without me having to talk to them or forgive them."
Pathetic.
All adults, too!
I've become acquainted with some of these "enemies" as well as their "enemies," after reaching out to so many people regarding problems within the furry fandom. Despite nearly everyone seeing eye-to-eye, those that were brave enough to speak to me still refuse to talk to others over differences in opinion from the past. When confronting them and offering to help bring them together over something completely unrelated (something that children can do) they still refuse, while telling me they want the others to apologize and to reach out first, but at the same time saying they'll still refuse to talk to or even forgive them.
You wanna know why the fandom is in the state it is right now? Because of childish behavior like that, from people of the generations who knew what it was like to fight with friends and get over it (in other words, should remember exactly how to remedy this pathetic issue).
I don't get pissed off by much, but these people want to keep complaining about how bad the fandom is and how terrible people are, while pulling this kind of behavior that's allowing infections to fester, it annoys me to no end. It's like two idiots in a rowboat stuck in the middle of a lake and complaining that they're stuck while refusing to pick up an oar because they don't like the other person, then continue to complain some more that they're stuck. Now imagine one of those giant viking ships with dozens of oar dudes who all hate each other because of some stupid and petty arguments in the past, and then imagine their ship is under attack and sinking, so they complain about that while simultaneously complaining that no one else is getting them the heck outta Dodge.
"I don't like them, so I want them to apologize to me but without me having to talk to them or forgive them."
Pathetic.
All adults, too!
How I get along with people easier
Posted 2 years ago-Keep politics out of the conversation
-If I have personal beef I acknowledge it and call it stupid
-I direct the focus toward our interests and more positive things to bond over
-I keep disagreements at that and move onto a different topic because arguing gets annoying real fast
-I strive to make friends, not allies, from mutual acquaintances.
-I acknowledge no one's going to be or think the same as me, so I should never expect them to, while taking advantage of shared interests and use that to bond
-When life sucks, I can't rely only on myself. Friends are in it together, so I try to help them out in case they need it too. Sometimes even a smile can help a lot
-Don't expect someone to reach out to you or enemies of the past to apologize. They'll expect the same of you and no one will go anywhere!
-Try to have silly, lighthearted fun with people in conversations
-If you do for some reason fight, walk away and come back the next day and talk about something else while acknowledging where the tension started
I try to keep all of those in mind whenever I talk to someone. It's how I'm able to constructively engage with folks easier. Even if I don't get a friend out of the conversation, it's how I keep from walking away as enemies. Plus it's a huge sigh of relief for a lot of people when they're able to engage in a calm conversation like that when so many people nowadays just want to lecture and be miserable.
-If I have personal beef I acknowledge it and call it stupid
-I direct the focus toward our interests and more positive things to bond over
-I keep disagreements at that and move onto a different topic because arguing gets annoying real fast
-I strive to make friends, not allies, from mutual acquaintances.
-I acknowledge no one's going to be or think the same as me, so I should never expect them to, while taking advantage of shared interests and use that to bond
-When life sucks, I can't rely only on myself. Friends are in it together, so I try to help them out in case they need it too. Sometimes even a smile can help a lot
-Don't expect someone to reach out to you or enemies of the past to apologize. They'll expect the same of you and no one will go anywhere!
-Try to have silly, lighthearted fun with people in conversations
-If you do for some reason fight, walk away and come back the next day and talk about something else while acknowledging where the tension started
I try to keep all of those in mind whenever I talk to someone. It's how I'm able to constructively engage with folks easier. Even if I don't get a friend out of the conversation, it's how I keep from walking away as enemies. Plus it's a huge sigh of relief for a lot of people when they're able to engage in a calm conversation like that when so many people nowadays just want to lecture and be miserable.
Scenario
Posted 2 years agoSay two people are stuck in quicksand that's slowly consuming them and they're already waist-deep.
The only problem? They both walked into it voluntarily because they were too busy arguing with each other.
Now even after realizing their predicament, they still want the other one to apologize first and learn their lesson before they get together to work out a solution to get out.
Unfortunately, they're both distrustful and even with an apology they still feel it won't be enough and will surely start spitting and slapping each other's hand away.
What do they do to get out, and what could follow?
The only problem? They both walked into it voluntarily because they were too busy arguing with each other.
Now even after realizing their predicament, they still want the other one to apologize first and learn their lesson before they get together to work out a solution to get out.
Unfortunately, they're both distrustful and even with an apology they still feel it won't be enough and will surely start spitting and slapping each other's hand away.
What do they do to get out, and what could follow?
A weird feeling
Posted 2 years agoYou ever have that moment when you suddenly start thinking of someone and how they need you for something, and then that feeling doesn't go away?
I've been having that feeling for over a day now, but I'm the kind of guy to try not to annoy someone if I've already poked them recently, and I don't want them to get bothered by me.
On top of that, I don't even know what I'd say if I did reach out to them, but I can't stop the feeling that they need me.
I worry about people a lot, but whenever this feeling comes up I just want to somehow give them a hug, even though they barely even know me.
I've been having that feeling for over a day now, but I'm the kind of guy to try not to annoy someone if I've already poked them recently, and I don't want them to get bothered by me.
On top of that, I don't even know what I'd say if I did reach out to them, but I can't stop the feeling that they need me.
I worry about people a lot, but whenever this feeling comes up I just want to somehow give them a hug, even though they barely even know me.
Pornographic-Induced Status Social Amnesia From Friends
Posted 2 years agoHave you ever established a good relationship with someone, either as a friend, an acquaintance or even a relationship, only for them to either draw or get featured in a lot of porn, and soon everyone wants to "get with" them and they don't associate with you anymore?
Maybe they replace you with other friends, whether they're also popular, more fun, fun in "other ways," or maybe more sexually attractive in one form or another. Then it feels to you like your bond, your shared interests or you in general mean nothing now that they have a new sense of fake love in the form of idolization and lust.
If someone does that to you, they may be suffering from a case of Pornographic-Induced Status Social Amnesia From Friends, or PISSAFF. In this new digital age, likes, attention and satisfactions of lust are the newest key to enjoying life for most people. So congratulations, you mean nothing unless you can throw a whole bunch of money their way and get tons of porn with just you and them so you still have a place in their life. Otherwise, you're left alone, like millions of other losers nowadays.
This message brought to you by Friends - People important to you.
Maybe they replace you with other friends, whether they're also popular, more fun, fun in "other ways," or maybe more sexually attractive in one form or another. Then it feels to you like your bond, your shared interests or you in general mean nothing now that they have a new sense of fake love in the form of idolization and lust.
If someone does that to you, they may be suffering from a case of Pornographic-Induced Status Social Amnesia From Friends, or PISSAFF. In this new digital age, likes, attention and satisfactions of lust are the newest key to enjoying life for most people. So congratulations, you mean nothing unless you can throw a whole bunch of money their way and get tons of porn with just you and them so you still have a place in their life. Otherwise, you're left alone, like millions of other losers nowadays.
This message brought to you by Friends - People important to you.
How to eat like a Lumberjack!
Posted 2 years agoBuy a cheap off-brand of Mini Wheats (I use Malt-O-Meal Frosted Mini Spooners in the big bag) and save all the crushed, powdery flakes at the bottom to eat separately. Then break out the pine-scented air freshener, put on a beanie and flannel, and pretend you're starting your day off right with a big bowl of sugary sawdust!
It's a nice change of pace from time to time.
Pair's well with meat. What kind of meat? Whatever's outside! Deer, beaver, squirrel, your neighbor's annoying dog, rabbit, whatever tickles your fancy!
(none of this is meant to be taken seriously)
It's a nice change of pace from time to time.
Pair's well with meat. What kind of meat? Whatever's outside! Deer, beaver, squirrel, your neighbor's annoying dog, rabbit, whatever tickles your fancy!
(none of this is meant to be taken seriously)
How to enjoy strong whiskey if you're a lightweight
Posted 2 years agoSleep like a baby after one glass! (for best results, drink at home)
As a lightweight myself, I don't shy away from barrel-proof whiskies much, and going through the bottles I have I noticed that I unintentionally accumulated many with a higher ABV as they had a good flavor (I still think Larceny BP is a better buy than Van Winkle) ...but I can still sleep within minutes of having a single glencairn of my more potent stuff. lol
Just something funny that I thought of. I'm not a professional connoisseur, just a guy who tries things so I can give opinions and recommendations to people.
Same logic applies to wine, since dry wine can be flavorful but on the stronger side for a lot of people.
I also recommend argon for single people who can't drink much wine either, and don't shy away from screw-top bottles or under $20 bottles.
As a lightweight myself, I don't shy away from barrel-proof whiskies much, and going through the bottles I have I noticed that I unintentionally accumulated many with a higher ABV as they had a good flavor (I still think Larceny BP is a better buy than Van Winkle) ...but I can still sleep within minutes of having a single glencairn of my more potent stuff. lol
Just something funny that I thought of. I'm not a professional connoisseur, just a guy who tries things so I can give opinions and recommendations to people.
Same logic applies to wine, since dry wine can be flavorful but on the stronger side for a lot of people.
I also recommend argon for single people who can't drink much wine either, and don't shy away from screw-top bottles or under $20 bottles.
Resolve
Posted 2 years agoSo, aside from what happened with my job, I've been through a lot which I won't mention, but it has led me to a point in my life that I've been struggling with for years, but has just gotten gradually harder for me.
I've pursued many dreams throughout my life and... well... either encountered impassable obstacles or straight-up failed all miserably. I'm battling something that all millenials have been brought up with: figuring out what to do with my life, especially when all you try so far hasn't gotten you anywhere.
Where my main struggle lies, however, is the purpose in my pursuits. I'm not looking for my life's purpose, but rather the reason as to why I'm accomplishing anything, especially when I'm alone. Being out of a job for a month has reminded me how little of a life I made for myself, and thus how empty it is.
I'm not one who likes to strive for material things, nor to keep an image to please others, but I still am a sentimental and social animal. Whatever I'm able to achieve, I focus more on who I could share it with. I'm completely unable to enjoy things for myself. My goal in life has always been to be able to enjoy a stable life with others, with my resolve being whatever I can do to help others enjoy life as well.
So far, I've achieved neither, yet I'm continuously pressured to keep going for myself, but whenever I achieve anything for myself I don't enjoy it. Before anything I ask myself "what for?" I don't care too much about what it is, as long as I'm able to enjoy it with others. If I'm just going to be alone my whole life, it makes me not want to live it. Why would I only focus on myself if over time, nothing will change? Do I want to live the same day over and over again? It's not that I'm trying to live someone else's life, I want to live WITH other people in my life. What good can I do with my life if only for myself?
I'd forgo being a lonely billionaire just to have a group of friends always there!
I know that nowadays, fewer people are interested in things like friendships, relationships, or even developing their identity beyond what they want to show on social media. Many people can't even hold interests for long either. It's part of the reason people are so depressed and lonely nowadays.
I know the few people that'll read this will primarily let it fall on deaf ears, as it would anywhere save for those who are in the same boat without being able to do anything about it.
But if anyone wants to, just chat with me. I think we all need more of that.
I've pursued many dreams throughout my life and... well... either encountered impassable obstacles or straight-up failed all miserably. I'm battling something that all millenials have been brought up with: figuring out what to do with my life, especially when all you try so far hasn't gotten you anywhere.
Where my main struggle lies, however, is the purpose in my pursuits. I'm not looking for my life's purpose, but rather the reason as to why I'm accomplishing anything, especially when I'm alone. Being out of a job for a month has reminded me how little of a life I made for myself, and thus how empty it is.
I'm not one who likes to strive for material things, nor to keep an image to please others, but I still am a sentimental and social animal. Whatever I'm able to achieve, I focus more on who I could share it with. I'm completely unable to enjoy things for myself. My goal in life has always been to be able to enjoy a stable life with others, with my resolve being whatever I can do to help others enjoy life as well.
So far, I've achieved neither, yet I'm continuously pressured to keep going for myself, but whenever I achieve anything for myself I don't enjoy it. Before anything I ask myself "what for?" I don't care too much about what it is, as long as I'm able to enjoy it with others. If I'm just going to be alone my whole life, it makes me not want to live it. Why would I only focus on myself if over time, nothing will change? Do I want to live the same day over and over again? It's not that I'm trying to live someone else's life, I want to live WITH other people in my life. What good can I do with my life if only for myself?
I'd forgo being a lonely billionaire just to have a group of friends always there!
I know that nowadays, fewer people are interested in things like friendships, relationships, or even developing their identity beyond what they want to show on social media. Many people can't even hold interests for long either. It's part of the reason people are so depressed and lonely nowadays.
I know the few people that'll read this will primarily let it fall on deaf ears, as it would anywhere save for those who are in the same boat without being able to do anything about it.
But if anyone wants to, just chat with me. I think we all need more of that.
A fascinating failure
Posted 2 years agoWhenever you try something, go into it with an open mind and zero expectations. Not low expectations, zero expectations. You may very well amaze yourself.
I was preoccupying myself by making a drink while waiting for a friend to come online and game. I decided to make use of some ingredients I had laying around that were going to go to waste: those being store-brand instant decaf coffee and sugar-free toffee syrup.
Not only did I apply them in the wrong order, but when I added the coffee mix last, I skipped using a spoon and decided to shake it out of the container. However, the shake was a little too hard and I accidentally added 3 cups worth of instant decaf coffee mix into the liquid. Being slightly aggrivated and not wanting to waste it, I mixed everything together, adding an extra bit of the syrup to balance out the earthy bitterness from the mix.
I'm a genius!
I managed to make liquid car exhaust!
...or at least the closest thing to it that I could make.
Obviously it was horrible and I had to dump it out because my face was twitching, but it was something I didn't think was possible! lol
It might be a tiny failure in the grand scheme of things, but still more of an amusing memory than one I'd want to forget. ^_^
If you can't find brightness in a dark moment, make it!
I was preoccupying myself by making a drink while waiting for a friend to come online and game. I decided to make use of some ingredients I had laying around that were going to go to waste: those being store-brand instant decaf coffee and sugar-free toffee syrup.
Not only did I apply them in the wrong order, but when I added the coffee mix last, I skipped using a spoon and decided to shake it out of the container. However, the shake was a little too hard and I accidentally added 3 cups worth of instant decaf coffee mix into the liquid. Being slightly aggrivated and not wanting to waste it, I mixed everything together, adding an extra bit of the syrup to balance out the earthy bitterness from the mix.
I'm a genius!
I managed to make liquid car exhaust!
...or at least the closest thing to it that I could make.
Obviously it was horrible and I had to dump it out because my face was twitching, but it was something I didn't think was possible! lol
It might be a tiny failure in the grand scheme of things, but still more of an amusing memory than one I'd want to forget. ^_^
If you can't find brightness in a dark moment, make it!
Reputation
Posted 2 years agoSo, everyone at my old job knew I was a furry... no problem there...
but I literally just had the hearing for my side of the story regarding the harassment case filed against me, and me talking about being a furry was brought up in question.
So, while the fandom does have a bit of an earned reputation for it's lustful obsessions, it was fodder for this feminist. Apparently being a furry can be seen as a sexual advancement or insult or something, despite her being a proud feminist, twice my age and mean.
Just a warning to anyone out there, even though there's nothing wrong with anthro characters and art as a hobby, don't discuss it around feminists if you're a male. Being a furry = sexually explicit and inappropriate for the workplace, even if you never talk about anything sexual.
but I literally just had the hearing for my side of the story regarding the harassment case filed against me, and me talking about being a furry was brought up in question.
So, while the fandom does have a bit of an earned reputation for it's lustful obsessions, it was fodder for this feminist. Apparently being a furry can be seen as a sexual advancement or insult or something, despite her being a proud feminist, twice my age and mean.
Just a warning to anyone out there, even though there's nothing wrong with anthro characters and art as a hobby, don't discuss it around feminists if you're a male. Being a furry = sexually explicit and inappropriate for the workplace, even if you never talk about anything sexual.
Qualified to talk
Posted 2 years agoI get it, I don't deserve your time of day because I'm not popular enough to talk to.
But while I'm left in the dust, you'll be left alone one day when your popular-posse doesn't need you anymore because you're not popular enough for them.
Those who ride the image train of being nothing but a celebrity one day lose all meaning because they become forgotten and replaced with someone more relevant.
I feel sorry for all of you.
But while I'm left in the dust, you'll be left alone one day when your popular-posse doesn't need you anymore because you're not popular enough for them.
Those who ride the image train of being nothing but a celebrity one day lose all meaning because they become forgotten and replaced with someone more relevant.
I feel sorry for all of you.
The Hows
Posted 2 years agoThere's still hope for you.
Do not fear for your image, or for others' negativity.
Fear for your life, and for those around you.
No, not your physical life! The one you're living!
Do you think others are happy the way things are now? You certainly might not be, but you have the chance to make it that way for them!
They look to you not for support, but for a break from it all.
Inspire them. Teach them the happiness and positivity that you know... but have forgotten.
Don't acknowlege their "whats," speak with their "hows."
There is still hope for this world, but we must help.
How are you? I know you don't like this, and I know you don't like being alone... you never were.
Do not fear for your image, or for others' negativity.
Fear for your life, and for those around you.
No, not your physical life! The one you're living!
Do you think others are happy the way things are now? You certainly might not be, but you have the chance to make it that way for them!
They look to you not for support, but for a break from it all.
Inspire them. Teach them the happiness and positivity that you know... but have forgotten.
Don't acknowlege their "whats," speak with their "hows."
There is still hope for this world, but we must help.
How are you? I know you don't like this, and I know you don't like being alone... you never were.
Waagttail
Posted 2 years agoSo, I've been talking with a lot of people, not just on this site, but a lot of folks offsite, including former furries and public opinion, and a lot of people seem to be around the same page, which is why I'm mentioning this:
I came up with a nifty nickname for those who prefer the simpler, fun-focused ways of the earlier fandom around 15 years ago and prior, who just wanted to come here and do their thing without all the outside influence, depression, politics, identities, CONSTANT drama, pandering, and whatnot. For those who just wanted to go back to focusing on creative fun and making friends instead of acting like children, I've been calling them "waagttails," which is short for writing, art, and good things that are in life.
A lot of folks who've been fitting into that category have their own feelings toward the fandom, which I will not mention here for the sake of preventing unneccesary attacks against people (and because counter-narrative stuff tends to be frowned upon in the fandom nowadays). Many also straight up refuse to associate with the fandom because of these stupid issues and emotional pandering from them.
So, if you happen to stop by, whether you've talked to me or not, and you don't like what's become of the fandom and wish to return to the simple things from back in its hayday, feel free to call yourself a waagttail furry, or just a waagttail. It's catchier than the poison sumac root I pulled out a couple days ago, lol, though it's more of an attitude than a "movement."
Plus, as many feel like the fandom is dead or still collapsing, if modern culture is anything to go off of, this isn't anything new. People have had enough and just want to return to the original fun and hobbies they had before, letting the younger generations bear witness to it so they know how to enjoy life instead of constantly being depressed and fighting someone or something.
For those who just want to be happy... WAAG your TTAIL ! lmao
I came up with a nifty nickname for those who prefer the simpler, fun-focused ways of the earlier fandom around 15 years ago and prior, who just wanted to come here and do their thing without all the outside influence, depression, politics, identities, CONSTANT drama, pandering, and whatnot. For those who just wanted to go back to focusing on creative fun and making friends instead of acting like children, I've been calling them "waagttails," which is short for writing, art, and good things that are in life.
A lot of folks who've been fitting into that category have their own feelings toward the fandom, which I will not mention here for the sake of preventing unneccesary attacks against people (and because counter-narrative stuff tends to be frowned upon in the fandom nowadays). Many also straight up refuse to associate with the fandom because of these stupid issues and emotional pandering from them.
So, if you happen to stop by, whether you've talked to me or not, and you don't like what's become of the fandom and wish to return to the simple things from back in its hayday, feel free to call yourself a waagttail furry, or just a waagttail. It's catchier than the poison sumac root I pulled out a couple days ago, lol, though it's more of an attitude than a "movement."
Plus, as many feel like the fandom is dead or still collapsing, if modern culture is anything to go off of, this isn't anything new. People have had enough and just want to return to the original fun and hobbies they had before, letting the younger generations bear witness to it so they know how to enjoy life instead of constantly being depressed and fighting someone or something.
For those who just want to be happy... WAAG your TTAIL ! lmao
Job
Posted 2 years agolol You'll love this...
I had a job interview this morning at a place that does composite manufacturing for pipes. The job opening, from what an employee told me, was for a simple job that required making molds for pipes, which would basically consist of lifting molds into a furnace to cook and then removing them. I asked him how much I'd have to lift and he said no more than 25lbs, which my stick figure body could do!
When I met the hiring manager for the job interview this morning... for a place that says they only need a high school diploma AND offer training, they didn't specify that they required 40 year old guys with years of experience handling heavy cranes and machinery! One of the first points he got on was how they "don't usually get people around [my] age," before proceeding to look at my application and job history and saying "I would classify this job as heavy labor. Do you have any experience working with heavy cranes or other machinery?" Obviously I said I didn't, but told him I was willing to learn (since they said they offered on-the-job training on the application page). He said they're looking to hire people with those technical skills already... so I asked him where I could get that training... he said "high school, or other jobs that require use of heavy cranes and heavy machinery... or FARMS, since they use lots of heavy machinery too." In other words, I didn't know anything and had to get experience working in places with the same absurd requirements of already needing that expertise.
A little while ago I had a dude offer me a job working for a water company, telling me they needed someone to travel around to read and report meter numbers. That's it... when I went to apply, it said I need a Bachelor's degree in civil engineering... to read and write numbers?
Places these days wanna just complain how they need help and no one wants to work, but then people like me show up willing to work and willing to learn and they say "nah, we want older people with skills and experience who know what *hard work* is" cuz I'm sure someone making over $60k in construction is gonna come work here for $20/hr
I had a job interview this morning at a place that does composite manufacturing for pipes. The job opening, from what an employee told me, was for a simple job that required making molds for pipes, which would basically consist of lifting molds into a furnace to cook and then removing them. I asked him how much I'd have to lift and he said no more than 25lbs, which my stick figure body could do!
When I met the hiring manager for the job interview this morning... for a place that says they only need a high school diploma AND offer training, they didn't specify that they required 40 year old guys with years of experience handling heavy cranes and machinery! One of the first points he got on was how they "don't usually get people around [my] age," before proceeding to look at my application and job history and saying "I would classify this job as heavy labor. Do you have any experience working with heavy cranes or other machinery?" Obviously I said I didn't, but told him I was willing to learn (since they said they offered on-the-job training on the application page). He said they're looking to hire people with those technical skills already... so I asked him where I could get that training... he said "high school, or other jobs that require use of heavy cranes and heavy machinery... or FARMS, since they use lots of heavy machinery too." In other words, I didn't know anything and had to get experience working in places with the same absurd requirements of already needing that expertise.
A little while ago I had a dude offer me a job working for a water company, telling me they needed someone to travel around to read and report meter numbers. That's it... when I went to apply, it said I need a Bachelor's degree in civil engineering... to read and write numbers?
Places these days wanna just complain how they need help and no one wants to work, but then people like me show up willing to work and willing to learn and they say "nah, we want older people with skills and experience who know what *hard work* is" cuz I'm sure someone making over $60k in construction is gonna come work here for $20/hr
Impressions
Posted 2 years agoWhat makes a good impression on people?
Is it money? Is it good looks? Is it popularity or success? Is it being super weirdly kinky?
Just one of those days where I'm reminded that I got rejected by someone who works at McDonald's. Makes me wonder how much I have to make to be accepted by each tax bracket, or how many followers I need to have to impress someone I meet?
Is it money? Is it good looks? Is it popularity or success? Is it being super weirdly kinky?
Just one of those days where I'm reminded that I got rejected by someone who works at McDonald's. Makes me wonder how much I have to make to be accepted by each tax bracket, or how many followers I need to have to impress someone I meet?
Differences
Posted 2 years agoEvery time you see a difference between you and another person, quickly delete that thought and find something you have in common.
We need to stop being petty and letting little things, whether they be interests or opinions, separate us.
Just acknowledge you are not them, and they are not you. Then find something that makes the moment happier.
It takes just a couple seconds to say something bad about your enemy... you can enjoy a moment with them for minutes, hours, days, even years!
Amazing, yet sometimes impossible to think, but that's how it used to be.
If something can easily divide, just assume it should not be present in that moment. There is a time and a place for everything, and never is there a time to look for enemies.
We can all be children at heart, but do not have a childish mind.
We need to stop being petty and letting little things, whether they be interests or opinions, separate us.
Just acknowledge you are not them, and they are not you. Then find something that makes the moment happier.
It takes just a couple seconds to say something bad about your enemy... you can enjoy a moment with them for minutes, hours, days, even years!
Amazing, yet sometimes impossible to think, but that's how it used to be.
If something can easily divide, just assume it should not be present in that moment. There is a time and a place for everything, and never is there a time to look for enemies.
We can all be children at heart, but do not have a childish mind.
Gap
Posted 2 years agoIs it me or do a lot of folks just have a gap in journals made between 3-5 years ago?
Time
Posted 2 years agoImagine:
Comments made: 24
Notes made: 72
Average time to write comment: 10 seconds
Average time to write note: 1 hour (I'm a talky boi)
Random person: "Waddya like to do in your free time? I like to go golfing, flip houses, go to bars with my friends, I'm even writing my 5th novel!"
Me: "...oh, you know... just... chill with people. Talk about life n' stuff."
Random person: "Oh." *stares and backs away*
Comments made: 24
Notes made: 72
Average time to write comment: 10 seconds
Average time to write note: 1 hour (I'm a talky boi)
Random person: "Waddya like to do in your free time? I like to go golfing, flip houses, go to bars with my friends, I'm even writing my 5th novel!"
Me: "...oh, you know... just... chill with people. Talk about life n' stuff."
Random person: "Oh." *stares and backs away*
Fragrance
Posted 2 years agoSo before my last job cancelled me, I bought a bottle of cologne, as I am very self-conscious about my smell and want people to enjoy being around me.
When I purchased my bottle online, I got several samples of other products for free (which is common), but unfortunately the samplers they had to choose from were all women's fragrances... I forgot.
Fast forward a couple months to the present: I just got out of the shower and want put on something to smell presentable. I figured I'd save the good stuff and try one of the samplers.
boi...
I smelled like a steaming bouquet of Avon lotion representatives crammed into a resort sauna! Very floral with a soft, cottony musk.
I'm on the taller side for the femboy body type, but now I have the smell of one, too!
Two things I take away from this experience: A. Read the bottle and double check if it doesn't say if it's for men or women, and 2. if you're looking for a special gift for that favorite femboy maid in your life, then may I recommend Eden-Roc Eau De Parfum by Christian Dior. A very soft, slightly wet, attractive scent!
I know that people can use tomato soup for dealing with bad smells, but would that work in this case?
Or should I choose something more manly, like steak sauce?
When I purchased my bottle online, I got several samples of other products for free (which is common), but unfortunately the samplers they had to choose from were all women's fragrances... I forgot.
Fast forward a couple months to the present: I just got out of the shower and want put on something to smell presentable. I figured I'd save the good stuff and try one of the samplers.
boi...
I smelled like a steaming bouquet of Avon lotion representatives crammed into a resort sauna! Very floral with a soft, cottony musk.
I'm on the taller side for the femboy body type, but now I have the smell of one, too!
Two things I take away from this experience: A. Read the bottle and double check if it doesn't say if it's for men or women, and 2. if you're looking for a special gift for that favorite femboy maid in your life, then may I recommend Eden-Roc Eau De Parfum by Christian Dior. A very soft, slightly wet, attractive scent!
I know that people can use tomato soup for dealing with bad smells, but would that work in this case?
Or should I choose something more manly, like steak sauce?
Lojik
Posted 2 years agoDon't you just crave a bag of popcorn when people see a normal and sane individual as a loser for not having much of a life, a lot of friends, a lot of experiences, and even for being a virgin these days... then further contribute to the rejection and sometimes the mockery as well without seeing that when they add to it, they're making it worse?
Like, if you see it as a problem... why can't you be the one to do something about it? It's like that grade school behavior, but I see people do it as adults.
It's just really annoying whenever I see people who are depressed nowadays just for dumb crap like that, and in the new digital age it's easy to become envious of others for being more "successful" in life in those aforementioned ways when everyone wants to try to establish a social "status." High social standards are contributing to the problem as well (which so many people seem to recognize, but don't wish to address even within themselves).
With so many people nowadays "not wanting to get involved in drama" and saying they "want to keep to themselves and close friends," you wouldn't think that some imaginary status or reputation for hanging with people on a certain popularity level would still play any importance. Sadly though it seems like whenever you don't need to impress anyone, you still want to.
So then... what are those "losers" gonna do? It always gets to a point where it doesn't come down to them anymore. After that point, whatever dark path they go down, they'll get blamed for when it could've all been changed by just someone giving them a bit of happiness or company.
Will you? Nah, you don't care. They probably have some uncool interest that'll bring down your social image, or maybe even have some mental issues (totally not influenced by anything mentioned) that you don't wanna deal with, or dare I say, be a bit awkward or desperate. *gasp* Yeah, it's best to just leave them be a mess, eh?
[insert stonks npc man here] "Lojik"
Like, if you see it as a problem... why can't you be the one to do something about it? It's like that grade school behavior, but I see people do it as adults.
It's just really annoying whenever I see people who are depressed nowadays just for dumb crap like that, and in the new digital age it's easy to become envious of others for being more "successful" in life in those aforementioned ways when everyone wants to try to establish a social "status." High social standards are contributing to the problem as well (which so many people seem to recognize, but don't wish to address even within themselves).
With so many people nowadays "not wanting to get involved in drama" and saying they "want to keep to themselves and close friends," you wouldn't think that some imaginary status or reputation for hanging with people on a certain popularity level would still play any importance. Sadly though it seems like whenever you don't need to impress anyone, you still want to.
So then... what are those "losers" gonna do? It always gets to a point where it doesn't come down to them anymore. After that point, whatever dark path they go down, they'll get blamed for when it could've all been changed by just someone giving them a bit of happiness or company.
Will you? Nah, you don't care. They probably have some uncool interest that'll bring down your social image, or maybe even have some mental issues (totally not influenced by anything mentioned) that you don't wanna deal with, or dare I say, be a bit awkward or desperate. *gasp* Yeah, it's best to just leave them be a mess, eh?
[insert stonks npc man here] "Lojik"
Speaking
Posted 2 years agoI've seen many people, heard many cries, felt enough pain on my own part unable to imagine the minds and hearts of those who've known this family for a longer time than I have.
For those who don't like what has become of the fandom and wishes to speak their hearts out to me, please don't hesitate to contact me via one of the outlets on my profile instead of fighting on here!
Just keep your mind focused on Writing, Art, And Good Things That Are In Life!
lol "waagttail"
Just "waag your ttail!"
Admins, this is just letting people vent their frustrations! Relax!
For those who don't like what has become of the fandom and wishes to speak their hearts out to me, please don't hesitate to contact me via one of the outlets on my profile instead of fighting on here!
Just keep your mind focused on Writing, Art, And Good Things That Are In Life!
lol "waagttail"
Just "waag your ttail!"
Admins, this is just letting people vent their frustrations! Relax!
