It's sort of tradition that I do write something like that whenever I am year older .. it kinda seems though I have skipped it last year, even though last year was actully nice, and by that I mean that day ( my birth day ) not an actuall year cuz it sucked like whole my life .

So I am another year older, another year closer to beeing old and misreable .. no wiat, I am already that . I can count only two birth days in my entier life as good ones, and that was last year my 26th birth day , and my 19th one... or maybe it was my 20th ? I can't honsetly remeber but it doesn't matter , the point is that it generaly sucks for me and thats how it was this year, how it was yesterday . I don't care about stupid gifts.. maybe I did a little bit when I was little kid, or about even more stupid wishes ... even though they are actuly nice when someone really do mean it and you can see it only if you meet someone in person... what I want is not to be a fucking lonely for one fucking stupid day in a whole year.. each year I become more and more disapointed and I grow to hate people even more ...

I wished for something more

Around 7 PM Warsaw time I truned 25 this year, exact date is March 12th of 1991 year, it was also Saturday just like today. Maybe that is way this year seems somehow different .. I donno first time in my life I don`t even care anymore about that Im speding my special day totaly alone .. few more people really care about it even though they are not here I guess that gets me going as well .. special thanks to those .. as well there is another more probably simple reason to that ... I`m sick .. so it seems like everytime when I`m sick .. I care mostly about myself .. its not beeing selfish it is just how it works always.. don`t really have time for anything else than beeing sick .. thats how my brain works I guess .. I don`t really remeber when it was last time when I came across something little serious about my health such as this flu I guess , don`t really know what I have contracted.

It's kinda every year tradition since I`ve started using FA to post journals about my B_Day .. well I don`t really post anything else in that matter .
I Hope you all people stay safe and healthy .

Like every damn year .. I write this few words here .. hoping, literaly lying to myself that it will be better this time .. that today is the most important day for me, after all, in this entier year .. that something special just has to happen today .. something really joyfull ..how stupid I am to always believe in such a fairy tail .. now a days ever my family forgets about me .. I`m always alone .. nothing will change this time

Well yeah .. fucking happy birthday to me

I don`t post here too much .. never really do any other kind of journals I don`t really feel like shearing with people so much unless they ask for it. Its another year for me I`m another year older and not happier same time. Today is my 23 B_Day probably will be lonely party for just one like every other year. We shall see its midnight here so day just starts . I just wish that this year was somehow different.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10837404/ If you wish to win in this contest just simply follow the rules every one have equal chances

The Day is almost over just a few minutes till that. Someone could think that Birth Day should be something special, that something unusual should have happen that day, that we should feel special and be generaly happy about that we live . From whole year this one particular day should be awesome .. but yeah it should be thats only theory for me .

I wanted to say many thanks to all those who wished me Happy Birthday and all other stuff. And I don`t want to be ungratefull, those of you who were really frank about that ... well you guys are awesome ... but I have to say that .. thats why I am writing all of this .. that even that this day was really shitty for me .

It wasn`t the worst day in my life , not at all .. it has started rather good ... but I was so teribely lonely.... really do I mean complelty nothing to anyone on this fucked up planet ? Do I always have to be fucking alone even at day like this ?

Well I guess yes .. that because I probably am nothing and mean nothing to anyone . Instead of beeing happy I am all depressed .... I did get nothing but all of those wishes ... some of them really beautifull and like I said I don`t want to be ungratefull or anything ..... it just I can`t handle it anymore on my own... and if will go like that every next year .. something bad can happen :(

To make matters even worst my own lap has broke on me.. I`m using some old crap to write all of this ... I guess thats all for today .

Thank you for readeing I hope that your day was better than mine.

I donno what I could wish for my 22 B_Day... I could be materlialistic wish for new computer, laptop, new mobile or something like that .. I could feel more generous wishing others people wonderfull day of 12 march wich is my B_day and that something good happen to them that day I actually will pray to Lord asking about that ... or I could just wish to spend that day with someone importnat for me or just someone who cares for like really without question instead of speding in all alone like I always do.

Today will probably be no different than the others, even though to me it feel somewhat special it doesn`t to anyone else means I am not special at all to anyone ... at least this is how I see it and feel it and what was shown to me diuring this whole 22 years of my living . So I could make yet another wish that everything which was bad in my life just disapeared, that it would occured only bad dream, a nightmare and that when I wake up reality would occure wonderfull that I have someone to call my own, that I have loving friends and family who accepts me.

I think thats all for now till next time guys, and remember today is a special day for everyone .

My favourite song about B_Day http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2DxJW6ytSs

I`m not really sure what to wirte in here. Today is my b-day which should be the joyest day of whole year and I think it will be awefull Only last year I had someone to spent those with ... this year just like any other I`m gonna spent them alone cause no body really wants me. But who knows maybe thats just bad dream and I am terribly wrong by some miracle , donno why though I honestly doubt it

This one Furry Name Meme I borrowed from Bianko  bianko :

Follow this to figure yours out

A = French Kisser
B = Good Kisser
C = Will kick your ass
D = Very very easy for people to like you
E = Crazy as hell
F = Loves it hard
G = Can kick your ass
H = Freaking hot
I = Everyone's best friend
J = Hot
K = Crazy
L = Beautiful eyes
M = Very good kisser
N = Cool person
O = Different
P = The best at all sports
Q = An animal lover
R = Beautiful/handsome
S = Damn sexy
T = Easy to fall in love with
U = Will make you laugh till your sides burst
V = Most amazing kisser EVAR
W = Makes people laugh
X = Never lets people tell you what to do
Y = Can be funny and dumb at the same time
Z = Loved by everyone

This is mine : Gabriel AngelFox
G=Can kick your ass
A= French Kisser
B=Good Kisser
R=Beautiful/handsome
I=Everyone's best friend
E=Crazy as hell
L=Beautiful eyes

A= French Kisser
N=Cool person
G=Can kick your ass
E=Crazy as hell
L=Beautiful eyes
F=Loves it hard
O=Different
X=Never lets people tell you what to do

Licks meaning meme :

♥~Meaning Of A Lick~♥

*Lick on the Tail* Will you be my mate?
*Lick on the Ear* I think you are cute!
*Lick on the chest* You mean the world to me~
*Lick on the stomach/Belly* I'm ready.
*Lick on the Forehead* For comfort.
*Lick on the Paw* Are you ok?
*Lick Below the Chin* I like you.
*Lick on the nose* I love you.
*Lick on the Neck* Let's have some fun =^-.-^=
*Lick on the Shoulder* I want you.


♥♥

I`ve stole this from Mindnightfurry yeah I`m bad :P

1.How old you will be in five years ?
25

2.Who did you spend at least two hours with today?
Irl with no one particular online with my bf Asti

3.How tall are you?
Something about 1.80 cms

4.What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks?
I`ll type here something intresting once I`ll have something like that , right now I dont.

5. What's the last movie you saw?
It wasn`t really movie but I saw entire first sezon of Game for Thrones

6.Who was the last person you called?
My boyfriend Asti

7.Who was the last person to call you?
My boyfriend Asti ( I know I`m not original but cant help the truth :P )

8.What was the last text message you received?
It was from my boyfriend that he is busy and he is going to do some shoping and that we will talk when he will be back

9.Who was the last person to leave you a voicemail?
I don`t even know how to use this thing o3o.. no voicemail

10.Do you prefer to call or text?
Text cause its cheaper.

11.What were you doing at 12am last night?
Talking with my boyfriend Asti on skype and checking some FA.

12.Are your parents married/divorced?
They are still married and it don`t seem they`re going to divorce.

13.What time did you wake up today?
Something around 9:20 am.

14.What color are your eyes?
They changes so many times that I can`t really tell on last photo I made they were green though.

15.What are you wearing right now?
Black t-shirt with some balck character from Super Mario Bross with inscription on it You Lose (its first time ever I wore it, it is brand new) some blue jeans with bottuns ont zipper black bealt and balck socks

16.What’s your least favorite part of sex?
That some guys were bitchy about it it takes me a little longer to cum while they wanted to do anything with me.

17.Do you like Christmas songs?
I love chrimstas songs and chrismtas carols in my own language Polish but I like those in english too.

18.Do you have a favorite place or places?
I don`t consider any place of my favourite I would say it will be though any place in which I would be happy and would be haveing good time with my boyfriend most of the time it probably would be my room but not in family house.

19.Do you have a least favorite place or places?
I hate crowds and unkown ppl .. anyplace where I need to go and meet knew ppl unless I want to do that.

20.Where would you go if you could go anywhere?
Visit my boyfriend in Władysłaowo or at his new place in Gdańsk.

21.Where do you think you'll be in 10 years?
Hopefully far away from my prantes somewhere happily living together with my boyfriend.

22.Do you tan or burn?
It denpends but usualy tan somtimes I get burn though.

23.Do you sleep with or without clothes on?
With someone alwyas naked ( well if its someone I can do that with) alone only in pjs its hard for me to sleep completly naked without anyone around to cuddle with.

24.Would you ever wear a thong?
If it was my fav colour and weren`t too tight yes I would. (black, red, blue , green whatever that would siut me I still donno though)

25.How big is your bed?
Two ppl can sleep in it and still there is space for someone else

26.What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
Monsters undentified, ghosts ( later I stopped beeing afraid of them geting believe they only want our help) and later it was devili and it is till now.

27. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer?
My family have both but I use only laptop sometimes desktop computer to play games when my bro is not around.

28.What was the last thing that really made you laugh?
My bro yesterday telling all of this still stuff

29. What color are your sheets?
If it measn thing I sleep on not I`m covering with they are pink usualy but sometimes in blue and white stripes.

30.How many pillows do you sleep with?
3 but thirs is additional and its really small and all greeny with cow on it and inscprtion I love to learn ( got in on chrismtas few years ago) I don`t really sleep on it just lays in bed with me

31.What is your favorite season?
I like all sesons I can`t tell I have my fav.. all have their pluses and minuses but I`m okay with only one if its too long, summer

32. ...

33. What do you like about winter?
I`m arctic fox I like sonw the most sometimes even cold, when you are depressed clod is the best at least for me, cold and rain. And aslo chrismtas

34.What do you like about the summer?
The heat and also I hate it the most sometimes, that everything is green, friuts and vegatables growing, sunflowers and of course like probably all holidays.

35.What is your favorite aspect of spring?
That everything is back to life after winter , that there it a lot of green after a lot of white when it can be sometimes pretty much depressing when its too long. That days are geting warmer and longer.

36.How many states/provinces have you lived in?
2 in one for 3 or 4 days lol

37.What cities/towns have you lived in?
Tarnów, Kraków , Lublin and some city in US which name I don`t know.

38.Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
It is question of what I prefer not what is wise to use to I will tell that bare feet, I like to feel free, be one with nature

39.Are you a social person?
Furries olny, mankind lost my trust long ago and its not thing they will ever gain again.

40.What was the last thing you ate?
If it counst I`m chewing gum atm if not it was cake made by my mum .

41.What is your favorite restaurant?
I don`t remeber the name but it some kind of resturnat where they have pizza and its on Grodzka street in Krakow city.

42.What is your favorite kind of ice cream?
Nearly anything eatable I know there there where many flavourus there in US probably some even not so much eatable but I will tell that my most fav since childhood is chcolate

43.What is your favorite dessert?
Choclate desserte from Dannone Company or whatever my mum bakes and I like.

44.What is your favorite kind of soup?
Red and white Barsch aslo soup made from sour cucambers.

45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
I don`t eat things like that I hate it.

46.Do you like Chinese food?
I like rice with curry

47. Do you like coffee?
No I hate it .. I drinked it maybe three times in my entire life and I wont do it again

48.How many glasses of water, a day, do you drink on average?
Bottle and a half ? something around that somtimes even more

49.What do you drink in the morning?
Milk mostly but I`m drininking diuring my breakfast since I`m eating cyrios

50.What church/temple/synagogue/other do you attend?
I`m christian catholic, I`m attedning then roman catholic church

51.When was the last time you went to church/temple/synagogue/other?
It was today .. I`m going there every sunday.

52.Have you ever said the words to a prayer and not really meant it?
Whloe my life since about some time when I really started use it as a some kind source of power and when I started to talk with God or whatever you call him Lord not really telling all those poems taught us by church.

53.Do you like to cuddle?
Its the olny thing on the Earth I will always tell without thining at any time of day at night that I love so much . Yet beeing lonely and alone don`t help in achiving that. Yes I`ve got bf but its a little bit complicated.

54.Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
Once I slept on someone XD not on bed so yeah on wichiever is comfy for me and I am able to falasleep on it.

55. Regarding your future, what is the best thing you could hope for?
Its not thing but person

56.Have you ever gotten stage fright?
I have it most of my life x.x

57.Do you believe in ghosts?
Yes , why not ? There are prfoos they do exist

58.Do you know how to play poker?
Yes I was taought by my parents.

59.Do you want kids?
Kids do need love this is first and most imporant thing without there can`t be even single word spoken about kids. Second thing I will never be biological father cause I will never have woman I just don`t won`t and I am not able. And third thing its not avaliable for me to adopt kids here if I`m gay so I would need to move to country where its possible. So for this question I will answer rather don`t know.

60. Do you speak any other languages?
English is my other language my first is Polish

61.How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today?
none its sunday so I didn`t had too and I`m not useing alarm colocks anyways anymore.

62. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't done in a long time?
Thinking ? XD nah there is no such thing at least I don`t know about it

63.Have you ever written a letter to a politician?
Hell no I`m not that crazy yet XD

64. When flying, do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seats?
I was flying only three times in my entire life so I really don`t know

65.Do you know how to drive a stick?
I don`t know what is it all about lol XD so probably nope

66.What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Books and computer games also sweets.

67.What's your preferred method of paying for things?
You ask for preferred not of which I use so I say in nature in meaning of yiff :P but really for life its cash since I don`t own or ever would like to own credit card.

68.What is/are your favorite TV show/s?
I don`t watch TV since three maybe 4 fours years.

69.Can you roll your tongue?
Yes of course its easy thing.

70.Who is the funniest person you know?
Szokblast I was never bord beeing around him

71.Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
I would if I had some sadly no :(

72.What is the main ring tone on your phone?
I`m fox so its basicly vibration only for my perverted mind :P and really I just got used to that there is now sound

73. Do you still have clothes from when you were little?
No I don`t have my mum gave away everything even my toys :(

74.What red object is closest to you right now?
Red hairs of girl in icon on FA lol :D nothing red in my room really close too me other wise its rolling chair kinda far fram calling it close

75.Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through (one of the long ones)?
I donno what this question is about so probably not :P

76.Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
Closed and its not matter of fear but practical thing there is no need for them to be oppened as well as they should be clsoed while clsoet its not used.

77.Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees?
Bear I like animals and I probably would know how to react. I hate bugs and bees

78.Do you flirt a lot?
I`m good at it so why not :P

79.What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Ketchup mostly but I like mcchicken souce too

80.What are you most afraid of?
Dieing alone, darkness when I`m alone and start to think wierd things even if I am with somone, devil

81.Can you change the oil on a car?
I was taought how to do it yet I never tired so the answer is I don`t know

82.Have you ever run out of gas?
I`m not a driver

83.Sum yourself up in 10 words or less
Think of what ever it siut me and put here

84.If you were an evil bastard, what would you be doing?
Killing people whloe around cause I would like it not for money

85.What was the last book you read?
I`m still reading it one of Scott Lynch books

86.Do you read the newspaper?
When I`m bord and I get it in my paws

87.Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Nope yet I had and my family is buing every month magazine about computers and computer games

88. ...

89.Do you watch soap operas?
When I was watching TV and I was bord I did

90.If you were taking a poop and eating a bowl of cereal at the same time and you dropped the cereal, which would you do: finish pooping then clean up the cereal or clean up the cereal then finish pooping?
The wierdest and craziest question ever lol :P I would finish pooping and then clean up everything

91.Who is in the picture frame closest to you?
Its bug O.o photo taken by my uncle from US

92.Jane Austen, yea or nay?
Who the hell is Jane O.o

93.What was the last note you scribbled on a piece of paper?
I don`t remeber

94. What is your favorite candle scent?
Roses

95.What is your favorite board game?
Monopoly

96....

97.How is your relationship with your mother?
Neutral most of the time

98.Who was your favorite teacher in high school?
Mr. Piss our bilogy teacher and our educator

99.What is the longest you have ever camped out in a tent?
Day or two

100.Who was the last person to do something extra special for you? My boyfriend

Make love no war condoms are cheaper than guns http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbeD.....rec_grec_index.

Wow good ppl, good furries thank you for all that support and feedback you gave me over whole that time, thank you to my awesome friends who were there for me other I needed or not . I hope all of you will stay with me still giving your awesome support and feed back .. I have long ago writen stoires to upload just couldn`t get anyone to check them :P Me being polish and haveing english as a second language, yeah its easy to make tons of mistakes disturbing in reading , so as soon as I get checked that stuff I`ll upload it . Aslo I should think of something to do for those 100 watchers I got till now :D

Thats all for now more good stuff hopefully coming soon

Go check it out http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2713027/