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That Innsmouth is beautiful this time of year. I think I'll head there soon.


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Twisting and turning bile words burning this is what rage is made of...

Whats happening? Hell... even I've lost track of what is going on in this damned city. Do I regret things I say? Lets just say I say to much and mean to little.

Actually at this point I'm not sure what I mean by ANYTHING anymore....

This world twists and turns so violently now I really feel like I'm in some kind of H.P. Lovecraft story. I've seen shadows move of their own accord and people walk then disappear into nothing.. As the shadow and people ebb and flow so does my grip on meaning in my words. *sigh* I just... dont understand anything thats going on now... I may not wish a long miserable life on anyone but for one damend soul that has been the bane of my life ever since I met him and to him I wish a very long live with perfect health so that he may see the death of everyone that he ever 'cared' about. More or less just bullied with threats of suicide he did... drove me insane for a short while...


Thats enough ramblings from me... off to Innsmouth I go!

For best effect turn your volume up loud enough to shatter the windows on your neighbors house.



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If only monitors DID come with a built in neck so you could strangle it when you felt pissed... then the world
would have MUCH less murder in it.



[font color=red]Its more an insult then an injury.[/font]


This has been brewing for SOME time....It just takes some time for something to piss me off enough to want to vent and doing so here provides a 'safe' alternative to me beating the ever loving SHIT out of some one in the house.
So yea I had a pissy day and broke a mouse in the process of venting my frustrations... also tore up another fucking shirt so yea -____- one less thing to wash and WEAR! Not that I give a shit right? According to half the fucking population [that I know of] of HYBRID RACCOON-HYENA's I'm a fucking weirdo fag creeper! You know who the fuck you are bitch... I hope you have a LONG MISERABLE LIFE!

You all wanna know who this certain thylacine wanna be is?! YUCHIDAYENA! A self appointed furry fandom police officer! The same one I wrote about in my other "WARNING VENT" journal... Bitch had the fucking nerve to pretend to be friendly with me THEN FUCKING BLOCK ME! I've never felt so pissed off at something so FUCKING STUPID! Its not like it was a fucking accident either! You have to actually physically TYPE the persons name in you wanna block! I tried to be friendly... gods know I apologized for stupid shit that I did and tried to be friends but after so many bitchslaps in the face I cant stand it anymore and for good reason too!

There is NO doubt I have some fucked up interests in my faves but for some boneheaded individual to judge me souly on those interests is an absolute SHIT reason. Ya wanna judge me? FINE Judge me AFTER meeting me and NOT BEFORE!


Bah....

Yuchi....

If she wants to be forgiven she can kiss my ass!

When did this self proclaimed yenacoon block me? Not to long after my grandfather'd died.... not that I care but its still iike a slap to the face. Its more an insult then an injury.


My dad keeps fucking hounding me to get a job get a job get a fucking job.... I wanna fucking get a job just so I can nail his ass to the fucking wall and tell him to shut the fuck up. So sick of hearing his fucking woes when he could just as eazily cut some of the other shit out or maybe LISTEN TO MY FUCKING ECO FRIENDLY TIPS! Instead what the fuck does he do... "You dont have a job yet so you dont have much say in the house." Fucking bullshit! They want me to be fucking responsible... --_____________________- fine fuckin example when his ass bends like a wet fucking noodle when someone around here wants something. AND WHO THE FUCK GOT CELLPHONES WHILE THEY WERE IN HIGHSCHOOL?! My sisters of course! Prepaid none the less but fucking cellphones! Half the time their bus isn't late.. MY BUS IN SCHOOL WAS LATE FOR OVER HALF THE FUCKING TIME I WAS IN SCHOOL! Did I ever get a fuckin cellphone to say "Hey mom.. missed the bus could you come get me?" NO! Course not lets NOT do something logical.....


Well... thats all for now I'm sure I'll get pissed off again soon and need to vent... Cya

Combichrist - Get Your Body Beat [Amduscia remix]


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Seems the family's running further behind on bills then we'dve thought! So as a consequence we may lose cable/internet for a while. *shakes his head solumbly* I keep tellin 'em what to do in order to save money but they dont listen! I could save 'em all a bundle if they'd only listen! How do I make such bullheaded folk listen?

_________________________________________________________________________________

With the aid of my dear mother I was able to get a 14 gauge in my ear! With minor bloodloss! :D She tried to get me to shove a 10 gauge pincher into my ear >.> that from what I could guestimate was WAY to small for my big earlobe! Not to mention it goes against the 'code' of gauging which is not to skip a size. I did infact go from a 16 gauge to the smaller width of the 10 gauge's 'arm' bit that was tapered to go from a smaller gauge size to a honkin 10 gauge :P I'm well on my way now to go to the size 4 i want in BOTH ears! :D well thats all for now ttys! :3

[center] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E29iOPSxF94 So.... I didnt fry my comp...

Fried my 'new' keyboard! DAMN THE LUCK DAMN IT TO HELL!!!

Now... I have to find some electronic waste people >.> see if'n they can take the keyboard off my paws.

This is just a place holder...
It seems I may have inadvertantly stalled any and/or all progress on projects I'd been working on.

Damn typing with a wii-mote is tough!!! >.< Anyway... in a foolish attempt to cool my laptop down I placed a double bagged block/chunk of ice on its normal 'hotspot' in an attempt to keep it cool... I let my youngest sister on it and as luck would have it... my carefully crafted ice containment device failed.
:C
This is only a minor set back rest assured! The story I am/was currently working on may or may not need to be re-wrighten...
I will be back useing any means possible to this I swear! If you need to talk to me note me or look for me on meebo/mibbit I frequent the anthrochat #floridafurs channel on the mibbit irc site.

Hope to see you soon! ^^

This came up in an IRC chat when I showed off a video to a local fur I know [It has been edited slightly because well... >.> it got weird in some parts because its ... well it just was weird lol]:

(11:37:09 PM) Ghost: Jori: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFj0FhRTmGg I made this :D
(11:38:39 PM) Joritiger: brilliant thus far bear! <3 Impressed already
(11:42:47 PM) Joritiger: Ghost! OH MY GOTH! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 I-I think I just orgasmed where I sat
(11:42:50 PM) Ghost: lol
(11:43:02 PM) Ghost: XD!!
(11:43:10 PM) Ghost: Thats a new one on me lol
(11:43:42 PM) furryonfire [yiffstar66@FUR-89ECC350.a.fattie.in.a.fursuit.in.anxietychat.net] entered the room.
(11:43:42 PM) mode (+v furryonfire) by ChanServ
(11:43:49 PM) Ghost: wb FoF
(11:43:50 PM) Joritiger: That is not only a good video you made, i-it-it's PHENOMENAL!
(11:44:15 PM) furryonfire: hiya Ghost
(11:44:20 PM) WebGuest6976 left the room (quit: Quit: CGI:IRC (Ping timeout)).
(11:44:21 PM) ***Joritiger is blown away from Ghost's talent
(11:44:55 PM) Joritiger: -blink- WOW just does not cover it
(11:45:32 PM) Ghost: Awww ^_^
(11:46:24 PM) Joritiger: <3 I am -grinz-


The video that Jori is talking about is my Grendel "Judged Ones" Video :D I am going to remake the 'Remnants" one >> just because its rather raggy..

Stole this from  Kuro_Urufu

1. Your Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Film:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of FA?
10. What's your philosophy on life?
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
13. What is your favorite memory of us?
14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarkey) - what are they?
17. Can we get together and make a cake?
18. Which country is your spiritual home?
19. What is your big weakness?
20. Do you think I'm a good person?
21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?
22. Describe your accent:
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
24. What do you wear to sleep?
25. Trousers or skirts?
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?
28. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you?

Today is the mirthday of my lil adopted daughter Fang The Pup! Saddly I was a bit busy and didn't catch her announcement of her mirthday until late :/

[yes I know that he is a boy irl >> shush]

Go forth and give her lotsa hugs 'n stuff! ^_^

Music Matters - Nick Cave


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So... on Sunday I was given the task of helpin put together a composter for the backyard with my pops. We banged it together pretty quick a quick'n dirty job :P. So yea we got that done and I go about questin for the one item that we do need which happens to be a big ol' stapler to put the fancy fencing onto the friggin composter! Ends up that we dont have one that is opperational the one that isnt all rusted up and gunked up wont fit the right staples! BUT thats not the real reason I'm tellin ya this! I went out to the truck to look in the toolbox on the back to see what I could find... popped up the lid and went divin into it! Damned the lid was hot but what I found under it was like finding a BIG HUGE GIANT BRIGHT Neon sign that said "Heres RAMBO!"... at this point you should get the jest of what I'm gettin at! :P I found a machete! Truely that is one of the most unexpected things I have ever come across in all my days. I've found bullet shells old jackknifes and pocket blades but never a machete....

Oh also I gottsa cellphone now :3 if ya wanna chat or just feel like texting me drop me a note ^-^ sorry dont feel like giving out my number publicly at this moment xD If I know ya well enough or somethin I'll drop the digits if not... well you'll have to wait!

Dead Silence


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Yep thats right I'm finaly ready for to start those dreaded things named 'commissions'! I got a paypal account [still dunno how to work it >> so any help would be appreciated! :P

I'm going to be doin stories and prints!

Short Stories - $5

Prints [photo manips and possibly actual photo's as we go on down the line!] are as follows:

CD Covers - $8

7x14 - $10

9x12 - $10

Custom size - Negotiation tiem! o.o

Sephiroth



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Ahh... the mountains of madness that are my thoughts and idea's. Now they have a new layer upon them to call forth even greater chaos into my life.

A . K . A

I've set forth on my life's journey to start my college career with the aid of my parents of course.

Where am I going? What am I doing?!

I'm going to H.C.C [Hillsborough Community College] Goin to major in Art and minor in Film production if such a task can be seen to or handled by me. Sorry for the twist of fancy in my writing here even though I'm sure this is fraught with errors both of spelling and grammar but it happens when I listen to something that catches my interest fully. Also I'm pretty much giving you small lightweight clues to my latest bit of art[<<linkage]. I'll give you another hint... a bit more of a hint then I'd really want to give but it'll be vague enough to not give away the answer... I hope.

H.P.L

:wumpscut: - We Believe




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Find me at the Dead Fronteir and join me in a romp through carnage!

Seriously o.o send me a note on there or something so I can have somone to play with XD my username there is Ghostbear! ^^

As of approximately 6AM this morning my stepgrandad or what ever you'll be callin him passed on. Cant say much about him other then what I have heard. I do know from the grapevine that he did go quickly and quietly.Not that it matters much but I cant stop thinking about how similar to the film "Big Fish" This all seems...

I thank any of you that have stood by me and with stood my ramblings on these matters up till now. The truth of the matter is that I hardly ever really saw him since I kept my distance from him due to the fact our personality's clashed like the titens we usually tried to blow ourselfs up to be.I sat near him though when this got to the crux of its 'existence'. I dont mean to imply that I never really truely enjoyed his company true sometimes he could've been a bit stubborn and bullheaded but the few times he actually made me smile I'm goin to remember. We butted heads every so often but the man wasn't totally intolerable as long as he didn't yell or scream.

Listen to me.. bein all sentimental and stuff...

I'm trying to get this Sony Handycam to work on mah comp but it wont work! I cant get anything off the disk and it wont 'connect' to the computer :C Its a Sony Handycam dcr dvd308 I've been trying to sneakily use it >> got all the right softwear on the comp just the cam wont hook up onto my comp with the spare USB I have! D:

Whatever day it is... Today degraded into a pile of shit so quickly its unbelievable.


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Valentines day a day for love and romance.

What a load of shit!

Day started out fine... and monotonously degraded down into a muddy little puddle.

Woke up around noontime because I'd spent an hour or so of the previous night in the bathroom doing what I'll leave to your imagination... then had a 'buisness' meeting between me and my friends concerning our project. Anyway... woke up like I said 'round noontime. Got a bit of flack for doin that.

Went into my parent's room and watched some tv. Got a box of chocolates and a little asian framed thing that said 'harmony' which I now have on my wall. Had it pretty quiet for a few hours. Then got flack from my granny for not doin something or somecrap like that... cant remember the reason. Did I mention that I hate it when people yell at me? >.>; Cant stand it at all its so rude... Oh wait... now I remember! A cola had come up missing and with out missing a f*kin beat! "Stephen must've taken it!" -___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________- I know its not yelling and to add to the list of things I hate is the whole 'blame the fat person' shit because there's more then one fat person here... Why blame me? I had a habit of stashing away soda's so I would have one so no one'd be able to drink 'em all up! I've since stopped this habit and my sister's now started on the habit of taking with out permission [she hasn't done it in a while but still]... OK back on track... So I get pissed off majorly because of that and storm off to my room and start steaming as the whole thought of 'blame the fat kid' is running circles around my skull...

In my rage I pound my keyboard and kick my stand causing it to fall along with my keyboard and laptop which didnt break... I'd have been even more pissed off had it broken. Oh and tore the plastic bag that I usually slide my keyboard into at night. Mature right? Me throwing a tantrum at 22.

Picked up my laptop dusted off the table and cleand up the mess from kicking the table which wasnt to much just the laptop, keyboard, mouse, coke bottle from friday, and shimmies I use to keep the laptop elevated so it doesnt go and melt itself . Was still pissed so I tossed the bottle against the wall. Cooled my engines in my room for an hour or two. After cooling down a bit I had to go with my pops and grab a loveseat and chair to replace with our couch. Got there found a small heart charm in the street which I picked up. As for the furniture we got... fuck me... lets just say if a motel, hotel, or gods... a funeral home *shudders*

I wonder... if I should happen to see a coffin when I wake what to think. Fuck I'd just run grab my shit and run. Train hop and all that crap.

And here we come to the second thing that just about fully drove me into my room... one of the cushions on the love seat fell down and I nudged it with my foot... grammy chimes up "DONT KICK THAT CUSHION! WE DONT NEED IT GETTIN DIRTY!" or something to that extent... fawk I hate that shit so I just decided to leave into my room... Came out only a few times one to grab some cake such.

And just a few hours ago my sisters went to feverishly clean up my youngest sisters bedroom... that wont last long trust me. Why did they clean the room? -_______- so the youngest could get a cell phone... warning here comes a rantissh thing...


I NEVER HAD A FUCKIN CELLPHONE WHEN I WAS IN FUCKIN HIGHSCHOOL! Nooo... I had to go to a friend to call my parents and have then come pick my ass up from the library across the street... My sisters are so fuckin spoiled in my opinion... they dont have to do half the shit I had to when I was in school! FOR FUCKS SAKE THEY HAVE EVERY OTHER WEDNESDAY AS A FUCKING HALF DAY!


OK I'm done... for now gnight all happy dreams :D

Oh and thank you ;iconfangthepup: for being such a cute lil pup for her daddy ^-^

E Nomine - Das Omen


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Its not colon cancer my stepgrandpops has! Its bone cancer!

Doesnt change the outlook! But atleast the docs are SURE of what it is THIS time... Maybe they'll say its ass cancer next?

Homeless yena... click here to help her

E. North St....




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Yes a shadow has settled over my house figuratively and literally [been raining here x.x]. Anywho... dont mean to sound emo so just bare with me while I slowly put this together.

I'll tell ya folks... I dont really let any of my life go by with out telling someone something that's happened to me or my family. I'm an open book if people'll just ignore the cover and open me up. Well... seem's that we got some rather heavy news just last night. My grandfather whom's been in and out of the hospital since early october has colon cancer and... sad to say its terminal. Now all this time he was in and out and in and out of the hospital they've been poking and proding him to see what's wrong and they couldn't have even gotten one hint of that cancer?

...

I digress... Well needless to say that the air is thick with a mixture of emotion that've yet to be sorted out. For lack of a better term its like a whirlwind's been kicking around here and has yet to leave.

Am I sad? Only a little... like Shakespear once wrote: "Why do you morn his loss if not for the knowledge that he's in Hell?" To this extent I dont mourn much for a loss rather I look forward to where the person in question is going.

Needless to say that my gramps [stepgramps actually but who cares at this point?] has given up on life in general opting to just fade to black sort-to-speak.

Keep us all in your thoughts, prayers, motions, notions, and that little sparkle in your eye! God's know that we'll be needing as much 'round here if there's to be a shred of sanity left here.


What a wonderful week...


OMG I'M A BANDWAGONEER!



Also... sometimes I just dont get fur's from my city -_________________-

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You've been POWNED!

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.


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I have now finished listening to H.P. Lovecraft's "Call of Cthulhu" and must say that it was a very good narrative! The narrator's voice was weathered not much but just so that it gave the story that much more pull... I earnestly didn't want to stop listening to it!

Now onward to the rest of the Iliad! If I could find some means of work I could possibly start on my OWN earthship and build my own library room. A room to fill with the best stories from written word to the spoken word. That in its entirety is my solemn goal for this year to get a job, lose some poundage, and get a social life!.. well MORE of a social life.

OMG :D we made Greek Gyro's here today! they were YUM! o.o we were missing a few ingredients but besides that everything fell into place wonderfully!

I've taking to walking in the mornings now. I walk down to the cemetery down the road to visit friends there now long gone. They moved the corpses buried in the cemetery for an unknown reason [at least to me its unknown] but the graves still persist as does the house that marks this place as a historical area.