It's a stated fact that my laptop is shit.
It's old, won't function in manners I need anymore, and it's battery is failing totally....

And I have no money to get a decent desktop that I could use for the little gaming I do or practising drawing and of course SecondLife.

I have wondered if I started doing non-color comissions for price (doubt no-one will get a comission from me) to fund a new better comp so I can finally get rid of this shitty laptop... another idea of mine was to put donation button somwhere and hope people would donate a bit to help me to get decent computer, but I doubt also that no-one will donate..

but if you're interested helping me way or another, let me know and let's discuss about it...

Also if anyone has some old anathomy/animal books they could spare for free, I'd be happy to receive them to practise my drawing

I'm starting littl by little be worried, how long my strenght can carry on..

I'm eating meds, but still I keep having suicidal thoughts more and more...


Last stictch was this that this one guy said to me, that he doesn't draw to other persons, and then drew to someone else.

And he's drawn for him many times...

And for me.... never... I've known him for years...

I can't explain why it's so depressing, but for me, art is eomthign nice, especially gift art, that I have just two, that I have almost begged for...


I've been so angry today, that I wanted so much instead of going to school, to go to the bridge and jump to the icy river...