I didn't want that journal from before to rule my profile. It would have been too negative and also I wanted to give you guys some report about art (and animation).

Of course, since I haven't been at home for 1+ week/s, I wasn't able to continue on any project. But I've made some sketches. I already scanned them, but I want to finish the current projects I'm working on before starting on something new.
But let me tell you, I got some awesome ideas for an animation-series I've planned some months ago! But I guess the first episode will be out in 2016 or a little earlier, I'm just taking my time. I don't want to have a rush on that project; I want it to look clean. At least I got an awesome idea for a teaser-trailer. I hope you guys will enjoy my upcoming projects!

I will continue on part 3 of "Through Our Place" today. I think it was a good idea to make a 4-piece-series out of these NSFW drawings, because it kinda forces me to stay active, and I'm enjoying it!

Also, (I'm not quite sure if I've already mentioned that, but whatever) commissions stay open as long as it comes to the point when I'm feeling drained again. But I hope that won't happen too soon. I'm proud of my improvement on canines. Can't wait when I'm also successful on felines!

Sorry about the last journal, but I also won't delete. I kinda like to let my watchers have the ability to get to know me in a more personal way, other than just putting on a mask for "professional behaviour".

Have a nice Easter and enjoy your day/evening!

It's just kinda fucked up.
This journal may be a bit personal, just placing a little warning right there.

Against my will, I got housed psychiatric hospital. When doctors make decisions, you have no chance.
So well, I even talked to a lawyer + judge about all of that crap. Because I got diagnosed with 3+ new disorders/mental illnesses (and right now I'm still being diagnosed!), people just got nuts and think it would "help" me when I get stuffed up with stupid medications (I secretly spit them out, though I sometimes gotta have some luck since they also tend to check underneath my tongue).
Right now, I'm on permission to go out. I will have to come back to the hospital tomorrow tho'.

I really hope I'll be completely outta there by the end of this week. It's just incredebily useless (for me).
People should really just leave me the fuck alone at some points. When I say I'm feeling fine, that's the case.
But oh no, doctors be like "No you're not and that's the problem; you think you're fine but you're not"
? shut up.
Sorry, I know I sound kinda childish right now, but I just go crazy about the fact that people make big deals out of my "problems" or diagnoses when I'm just doing fine.
The result is that I GET problems because people always butt in!

I've already planned to write a big ass journal again, about my diagnoses you know? Not to get attention, but I thought since I'm sure I know quite a bit due being diagnosed with 5+ mental illnesses, I could discuss a bit about that hairy topic.
Why I wanna do that is because I want to let people know that some stereotypes are just complete BS.
So yeah, it will be a similar journal to my old ""Big Deal!" Another talk: Attention-Seekers and Posers" one.
BUT I also thought about making a "podcast-like" video about it.
Damn, I feel like my English sucks today, just saying. I just feel like my grammar is really fucked up right now.

I feel kinda lost. I don't really know what I'm gonna do once I'm out of that shit. I really need to find a job, but I'm worried because all of these diagnoses. What if people don't want me because they think I'm a freaking psychopath? I'm just thinking about that, sometimes.

And oh well, you know what? I used to keep it to myself until writing that big journal or making a video. But yeah, here are my diagnoses. I mean, there's a warning because I said this journal might be personal, right? I'm desperately trying not to make a big deal out of those, but I already know I'm failing hard at it.

Asperger-Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder) - Diagnosed 2008
ADHD - Diagnosed 2013
(Anxiety/Obsessional) Neurosis - Diagnosed 2015
Passive-Aggressive Personality Disorder - Diagnosed 2015
Paranoid Schizophrenia - Diagnosed 2015 (all of that "How are your voices doing today?" in the hospital is really stupid)

Hope people don't be too annoyed by me.
Yes, I'm well aware I'm an annoying fucker.
Don't feel sorry for me saying that, I'm not trying to sound poor, I simply just know myself well. I would be annyoed my a journal like this one too *shoulder pat*
To be honest, I feel awkwardly ashamed for writing this journal.

What-is-anatomy-fest

Stream can be rewatched here
https://new.livestream.com/accounts.....events/3905447

Yeah, I totally feel like it.
Sorry for not announcing it sooner but I just got the idea by now and was like "Yea kay I wanna do that"
Cuz I'm a tard

"Buuuh me leaving FA forever 'cus it sux now!!"

gee

grab some popcorn guys
we shall watch some drama happening and sparkledogs being released

If so, probably at about 18:00 PM (CST/Server Local Time)
Going to use livestream. Still need to figure out how to work with picarto...

UPDATE:
I'll stream, but it'll take a bit longer until I'm ready. Things I had to do before took longer than expected. So I'll stream in about 1 hour (19:00 PM)
----

STREAM OFFLINE
https://new.livestream.com/accounts.....events/3824377

Sorry, it was VERY short. Had to end all of a sudden because yeah...you don't need to know. Sorry. Maybe I'll stream again tomorrow!

You can still rewatch though. Oh and by the way, the stream up top isn't the newest one, the one below is. I published them as draft in the wrong order.

2 years ago we had to put our cat to sleep. And yes, I've already made a journal about the shitty fact that also on this day 3 years ago I joined FurAffinity. Irony hates me.

Welp, the main reason I made this journal is pretty stupid. No one should care that much about my OC, but oh well...
I've been struggling with that question for years.
http://strawpoll.me/3845884

by the way, if I'd go for an OTP, I wouldn't even know who to pick yet. There is one specific (new) OC which I've never drawn or mentioned yet, but I'm so unsure...

Somebody help me !!

Heya! ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽

I'm almost done finishing a little (sort of) commercial drawing for commissions. Actually I got into way too much detail than planned at first hngh.

Just a quick info:
I may be working at an animal sanctuary every now and then soon (I already have some kind of a job, but I just got there to get money for my horse and meh). So I maaaybe will not have that much time to spend starting off in the following 1-2 months.

Anyways...
Since I don't really want a job, but want to be completely independent, I really need to continue on writing.
I know, 5 of 7 people voted for an animation series on the poll, and I won't just cancel that idea, but I also just need to get more active when it comes to writing.

I've been drawing more lately, which is good, but I need more critique. I'm very thankful for my friends who are helping me out, but it can't just completely rely on friend's critique, since friends are always going to be a bit more gentle (damn that sounds kinda insulting. I don't mean it like that but oh well).


This whole ting summarized:

I'm asking you to be more active with commenting. Usually I'm not one to comment often myself, but yeah, it also would let me know how many of my watchers are actually active.

---

The commissions, which I'm going to set on open very soon, will be last chance for anybody to get adult art with their OC and my OC Sophy. I used to even offer her for requests, but as I've already mentioned some months ago, I want to retire her from NSFW art with other people's OCs (as long as they're not friend's OCs).
Maybe I'll sometimes still offer her, but only for commissions, + she may be a little more expensive compared to drawing an own OC from the customer.

I once had a poll about how the prices from commissions by me should value. There was

1 vote for 5$
1 vote for 15$
and 1 vote for 25$

so it actually should be around 15$, but for my first commissions in months, I'm gonna make it a bit cheaper.

Way more information will follow on the announcement drawing!

These moments when you're like getting no progress on art because
you're fucking staring at your own OC's bust like "mm hella I drew some nice tits on her"

In about 3 minutes I've seriously done nothing else but stared on Sophys frickin tits !!

awkward

Gee, I'm scared. I feel so nooby HELP. Sorry for the drama about this but omg I've never done this before plus it's pretty much the first NSFW story I've ever written like that. I feel ashamed already somebody please send help ;;

Sorry for the break! Especially I'm embarrassed about the fact I still didn't post the story I mentioned at least one month ago. If I don't get that one done today, I'll just post the unfinished version for now - in German. Sorry. But maybe it's not that bad. If I get critique on the German one first, I'll know if it's even worth translating (I'm such a prick). Anyways, the NSFW piece will soon be finished! - Tomorrow, when it takes me longer than I'm expecting right now. After that I'm trying to get other stuff out of the way, before I can start working on animation.
Judged by the poll I posted some time ago, it's pretty clear people want animation, hah.
So yeah, expect something to come up tomorrow!

EDIT:
Gee, I'm glad I at least got the NSFW drawing done BUT I'll upload the story tomorrow (1st March), because I'm really exhausted now and I don't want to put at risk that anything might be in need of getting fixed and then I'd upload something embarrassing again. Sheesh, I'm so stupid.
If I don't do that tomorrow: Ask me for my address so you can come over and beat the shit outta me (for making way too many promises all the time and not keeping them). Please.

(I'm using the words "Gee" "Sheesh" and "Gosh" way too often recently. These are like my 3 favourite words atm)

Oh yeah and thanks for watching! Got the 60 watchers milestone :o

This is happening quite often since past week haah.
Trying to get progress on something really old from late 2013.
https://new.livestream.com/accounts.....events/3824377

Sorry, couldn't finish the NSFW piece today, but I got progress. Since my burnout still isn't quite over, I don't want to rush myself into my drained condition again, so I'll take it a bit slow. Quality has priority over quantity anyways (;

Some more information!
It's not much, but I added progress bars for current art projects to my profile description!

I finally got back to drawing NSFW, I sketched part 2 for "Through Our Place" about 2 hours ago and right now I'm already colouring! I'll take a break now tho, but I might finish it til tomorrow. I might.
I'm a little proud about getting a little faster at drawing, idk, maybe it's just temporarily. Hope the piece will turn out well. Canines are still a hard thing for me.

Go watch my bestie,  krasny.
Now.
She's better than me. Ahaha it's no lie B)
And she might even upload NSFW stuff some time, so yeah.

Whoop I'm gone again.

BTW:
I just ended a stream. It was pretty short, but worked out pretty good (when it comes down to my level)
https://new.livestream.com/accounts.....events/3824377
note to that:
"*FOR ANYONE WATCHING THIS AFTER THE ACTUAL STREAM* : Yea of course, at the beginning of the stream it's kinda nooby, but after the music worked properly, everything went actually fine "

Update: The 2nd stream from today can now also be re-watched!

Please answer me quick.
Don't worry; - if I'll focus on one on these, it doesn't mean I'll be inactive when it comes to drawing.
http://strawpoll.me/3673061

Today I'm pretty chill so I'm going to continue on working.
Also, I kinda got into the mood of designing adoptables, so maybe I'll upload some soon.

Because I don't want to spam too many journals on here, here's my Twitter:
https://twitter.com/@DiddyVicious

and my YouTube Acc (something will be uploaded soon!)
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8.....IWzQqXtPlEPBJQ

The stupid touch is finally gone, while the pen works perfectly fine ~
1.000.000. thankings go to  Waccoon for helping me out!
Also, if anyone has the same problems as I did, there now is a great example found in my last journal's comments for someone who's kinda acting silly and still can be helped :B

I just got my Bestie's old Bamboo tablet, because we hoped maybe it was my tablet which was broken. Actually, I wasn't that full of hope. And now I've got prove. With her tablet, it's exactly the same problem. Can't deactivate the shitty touch.
It's my crappy scrap box of a PC then. I'll be able to get a new PC in about 3 months. Maybe.
I don't know if it'll help if I take it to someone who maybe could repair something. Guess I'll have to reinstall Windows though, and I don't have the software. Also, I don't have a enough of money for a new system driver to be installed.
So, what does that may mean? No digital drawing in months?? I'm probably going to unlearn some drawing-skills in that time! ;;

I really don't know what to do anymore...

I can't even describe my hate for this whole world right now. I would like to start writing all of my thoughts already, but it's getting really late and I feel like maybe I should talk about all of that with a person I know well before posting a Journal which I may regret later on.

If there's a tough person out there who doesn't get offended too quickly, maybe send me a note or something.

Maybe my extreme anger will be over after sleeping, but I just feel like I could nuke the whole world right now.
Hello NSA.

PS: Pretty sure I'll post a Journal after this one with a Chat-History or something, in case there's going to be a conversation.

Today, on my Birthday I didn't get the rest and alone-time I wanted. I feel completely worn out and I don't know if it's going to be a constant state again. I'm just feeling absolutely wasted and I hate it. It keeps me from working...
As much as I hate it when people say they are going to do things and then they don't, I just can't get myself to work. Sorry...

I'm about to translate the story I've mentioned some time ago very soon.
Yet it is 3 full word-pages long (~ 2.550 words, Font-Size = 10), but I will extend it to at least 4 full pages before translating.

I hope I'll be able to translate everything without having that of a big struggle.
Unfortunately, it seems like I won't be able to draw a thumbnail for it though. I don't know. I doubt I will be able to draw again once I got my Bestie's old tablet, because I guess the problem is my damn PC (I really need a new one).
However, I may already start translating today. Hope I'll get (positive) feedback on the story once I've uploaded it (or any feedback at all).

Before uploading the translated edition, of course I'll upload the German one first!

PS:
I'm not a pro.
Generally I've been writing for at least 5 years, but writing longer (NSFW-)stories is pretty new to me. I still feel like a maggot when I read stories from "successful" people.

I may be able to draw digital by the end of this month. At least I hope so. But uh...have some test results?

96% Sadist (holy)
91% Switch
84% Masochist
83% Brat Tamer (with special sweets.)
80% Bondage Giver
80% Bondage Receiver
80% Dominant
80% Master/Mistress
79% Brat
79% Experimentalist
75% Daddy/Mommy
75% Degradation Giver
75% Submissive
70% Primal [Predator]
70% Primal [Prey]
63% Degradation Receiver
58% Girl/Boy (Meh I'm not really into the whole "Daddy & his girl" thing. At all.)
50% Slave
41% Non-monogamist (what no I want a fixed relationship .-.)
41% Vanilla
41% Voyeur (I C U)
23% Pervert (Needs more ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )
17% All-Rounder
13% Exhibitionist (I say 0%.)

Somehow this result is confusing..
there are so many ties :'D

You can take the test here:
https://bdsmtest.org