Gotta say it's been extremely frustrating to learn to use blender(3D modelling/animation) and Godot3(game engine) for past couple weeks.
Well, atleast I did a derpy chick and managed to put it in a platform where it can run around while clipping its wings inside its body. >.<;
Kinda glad my contract ends in couple weeks, for what its worth, it was interesting to learn some basics of game development.

Anyway on the other things.
Time management has been a challenge that I finally think I got in order. I've made schedule for myself for each day so that I dont end up breaking my hand because I drew too long, also to remember taking breaks. ^^;

Also I'm starting to invest more into patreon,there will be no paywalls but chance to vote in character/pinup polls is 6$ and to make suggestions each week for sketches is 10$.
Currently have April poll up in my patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite

And dont worry, cellshade commissions are still top priority to finish. ;D


Cellshade list:
1. Saffronaut - Done
2. Thalkarsh
3. Thalkarsh
4. AMinkIsFineToo
5. Narokh
6. xXKindjalXx
7. Cobalt_Marie
8. DarkriderX
9. thelaughingfur
10. Narokh
11. AMinkIsFineToo
12. ValorAD
13. DarkAngel1024
14. DarkAngel1024
15. DarkAngel1024
16. BecquerelSparks
17. Taryncrimson


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: closed(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

Good news! I just got confirmation that I'm no longer in danger to lose roof above my head!!! YAYYYYYY! :D
Fecking christ I feel like I can breath again....for a week now I've been a nervous wreck.

Little bit of bad news is that my funds are currently just 40e. But I can and honestly rather will live for couple weeks with just that, than go throu a mess finding a new home,having to pay for that and still owe the large amount of money to current landlord.

Once again, I can't Thank you people enough for all of this help I got. ^^


Cellshade list:
1.Saffronauts- Done
2. Thalkarsh
3. Thalkarsh
4. AMinkIsFineToo
5. Narokh
6. xXKindjalXx
7. Cobalt_Marie
8. DarkriderX
9. thelaughingfur
10. Narokh
11. AMinkIsFineToo
12. ValorAD
13. DarkAngel1024
14. DarkAngel1024
15. DarkAngel1024
16. BecquerelSparks
17. Taryncrimson


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

Apperantly the amount 520e I wont get fully on my hand 'cause there is still a payroll taxes that take about 104e away from it.
This leaves me 100e short from what I originally thought could be enough....

Goddamit, if it isnt one thing then its another...

I also want to apology over repost/spamming the Cellshade offer pic. I've noticed it has been easiest and effective way to get peoples attention.

Info about the sale: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8582606/
My paypal blacklite[at]suomi24.fi

Cellshade list:
1.Saffronauts
2. Thalkarsh
3. Thalkarsh
4. AMinkIsFineToo
5. Narokh
6. xXKindjalXx
7. Cobalt_Marie
8. DarkriderX
9. thelaughingfur
10. Narokh
11. AMinkIsFineToo
12. ValorAD
13. DarkAngel1024
14. DarkAngel1024
15. DarkAngel1024
16. BecquerelSparks
17. Taryncrimson


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

For everyone that jumped up to help me....thank you.
I'm not good with words, never was.

I made mistake not counting in the taxes...
Unfortunatly I can only hope this will be enough....but the amount that a two person's gave to help me....a stranger like me.
I could only shed a tear, from out of happiness or relief.....I'm not sure.

These two people, whose incredibly generous donations, without them I'd already feel like drowning.
I simply cant muster how grateful I am to them and everyone else.

Thank you.

Info about the sale: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8582606/
My paypal blacklite[at]suomi24.fi

Cellshade list:
1.Saffronauts
2. Thalkarsh
3. Thalkarsh
4. AMinkIsFineToo
5. Narokh
6. xXKindjalXx
7. Cobalt_Marie
8. DarkriderX
9. thelaughingfur
10. Narokh
11. AMinkIsFineToo
12. ValorAD


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

I've fucked up....really did this time.
The thing is that because I started new job at middle of last month I didnt get usual income support that I've could pay my rent with.
I owe about two months rent to landlord.(first months amount I paid in little pieces or tried from what I could afford)

Because I couldnt pay this time at start of the month I got eviction notice and due date I managed to move little bit to next tuesday.
Also I will be able to keep the house only if I pay atleast little over the total sum from wich currently is at 1000. So I'd need to pay minimun of 600
I should be getting my paycheck by friday but it's only around 500 or so and I barely got anything in my bank account already. >.<

I don't really wanna do this and open more slots 'cause the workload already is big enough, but I have no choice.
This is legitimate cry for help.

Any little bit would be helpful, small donations,regular commissions, signal boost, anything I'd be beyond thankful.

Info about the sale: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8582606/
My paypal blacklite[at]suomi24.fi

Cellshade list:
1.Saffronauts
2. Thalkarsh
3. Thalkarsh
4. AMinkIsFineToo
5. Narokh
6. xXKindjalXx
7. Cobalt_Marie
8. DarkriderX
9. thelaughingfur
10. Narokh
11. AMinkIsFineToo
12. ValorAD


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

Chance for slots in Cellshade discount pics will close after date 19.2.
If you havent gotten a slot and been thinking about it, now's the time. ;D
Info about the sale: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8582606/

Also I'm soon going to make a list on this journal of everybody who got a slot or two in order to complete.

Cellshade list:
1.Saffronauts
2. Thalkarsh
3. Thalkarsh
4. AMinkIsFineToo
5. Narokh
6. xXKindjalXx
7. Cobalt_Marie
8. DarkriderX
9. thelaughingfur


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Pretty much just a general update that I'm not disapearing or something.
Still working on the pics, but I definitly made mistake between from regular work time to art work time. (ofc including personal time)

Anyway, I'm positive will get things sorted out and more organized within coming days. ^^;


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

I'm making another sale for cellshaded pics for just 20€

These will be 1-2 chars with simple BG and cellshaded.
Payment via paypal only.

From SFW to NSFW themes but naturally nothing extreme.
More on that ya can find on my usual commish info.

If interested to grab a slot send note or email to blacklite[at]suomi24.fi with title "CS username"
Include refs and what ya would like to see or let me wing it.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

I hope everybody had good holidays and new year celebration.

Spending sometime with my family did really good for myself and had chance to recharge some batteries.
They moved to another city little over half a year ago. It's just two hour trip with train but damn thing always makes me little anxious.
Funny thing I got almost stuck there thanks to little mishap with tickets. ^^; Thankfully with help from their customer support things got fixed and I didnt have to sit on my hands for a whole week before getting back.

Good news, I got a kinda "study" contract starting from next monday. Now the really neat thing about this is that me and small group will start both learning about game development and implement what we learned and focus our invidual strenghts into small project.

Most likely this "game" will be just a silly scrap, but hey ya gotta start from somewhere. ;D


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

At first everything seemed really good.Ofc things have to hit the damn wall and break a bone or two. >.<
This years tax refund for me is rather large amount of money(hurray!) buuuut thanks to myself and mistakes I had made many many years ago, all of that sweet moneh goes to paying dept's(awww)

Alright no biggie, after losing a job(still searching) I have this nice income support wich allows me to pay rent,bills and such to live(yayy)
Now the problem is, they assumed I'd get the whole tax refund to myself and so reduced the amount of my income support half of usual(oh ffs)

Goodthing I contacted them over this whole mix up and its currently being solved.

Now to other things.
Streaming unfortunatly still cant be done due my piss poor isp.Which I would've change in heartbeat with mah tax refund but naah it was not meant to be. >.<;

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Looks like I made it to 27 years old. Yayyyyy-


Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/blacklite
Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

I guess it's better to jump on things later than never.

Well my patreon at the start will work more like a tip jar and as time goes on I will improve the rewards system.
All the content will be free for everybody without any delay and posted either here or http://blackliteart.tumblr.com/
My patreon:
https://www.patreon.com/blacklite

Now to the streaming....I'm one thouse really shy artists who get nervous and hands shaking if somebody is watching me draw.
Also my sketching is really....sketchy, like I can see clearly what I'm "building" in the pic and someone next to me is like "wtf is that suppose to be?" ^^;
I think streaming could help me with staying motivated and improve the speed aswell.
And it could be fun just for the heck of it. XD

I'll have first test stream in a day or two, gotta check out how to do it in first place. ^^;
Lemme know if anybody knows any good tips about streaming.

"UPDATE: aww dammit, apparently my upload speed is not good enough for streaming, I managed to configure things and did a little test run.
Anything I did came about 10 seconds later in the stream even though I did use the low settings picarto recommended for me.
Guess I have to hold on from streaming until I can afford proper connection speed >.<; "


Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Little bit an update how things are going,

First of all, I was in a accident 8th day and spent couple days in hospital. I got lucky and no broken bones or any permanent damage to brain but it's been really painful to move around and sometimes even to sit.
I've been dealing with this for a week now and my body is slowly recovering from this.

Other stuff is I've kept myself busy with sketching around and figuring ways to get rid of art blocks; one wich ingludes self-esteem.
Also need to do some organizing. I'm such a scatterbrain anyway ^^;


Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Well shieet, my "vacation" took a little longer than I thought. >.<;
Oh well, just gonna jump back to the saddle,slap some colors on Jessica christmas pinup and back to work.

On another note. Battlefield 1....What ya guys think about it?
The whole first world war theme is not my cup of a tea. Before BF1 was annouced I kinda hoped new BF woulda been new BF2142.
But I've played up my 10 hour trial of BF1 and gotta admit....it's a fun game! I really like the feel of "frontline" combat there is from time to time when large number of enemies try to push in to objective and our team barely holds on to it.

Ofc its not fun if team you are in is being scrubstomped to oblivion, but it really cant be helped. Just gotta play and do the best ya can with class ya like to play.(except snipers, pick anything else -.-)
Even though I really enjoyed the game I'm still not sure if I'm going to get it. Perhaps gonna pick it up when its on special deal sale.


Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Just wanted to get the holidays greetings over. I will be spending sometime with the family and all that stuff.
Too bad I didnt get the jessica christmas pic done by the time, but will finish it on later date then. ^^;

This year has been rather dreadful for the world and myself too, so I guess we all deserve a break with coming 2017.
Things are looking rather good and I'm feeling really energized for the next year.
Anyway, cya folks around. :)

Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

How many here has exprienced something supernatural?

I think of myself a "theist" and logical thinker when it comes to religion and such. But I've had my share of supernatural encounters during my childhood.
Like this once when I was taking our dog for a walk. I was taking her throu a shortcut when she suddenly stops, turns to look at me and almost instantly jumps back away from me whimpering, staring slightly above my head.

That moment was so unreal, ofc I tried to calm her down but then I noticed something...air was totally still, we lived back then close to a highway and there was always a distant sound of traffic but that time, nothing, no sound at all. I got cold shivers then I remember having this overhelming urge to run and that I did until I reached home.

Now in my adult life I've exprienced couple times something similar, or my apartment is haunted. XD
Also no need to worry about me losing my mind. Because these two cases can actually be reasoned with scientific facts.

First time was when I woke up, in my living room(wich is bedroom too cause my place is so small ^^;) I was just about to start my day and turned around to go bathroom. But then I noticed it, a figure looming close to the ceiling wearing a grey shredded cloak. I froze, I remember starting to chant "no no no no". It all felt so real, I was 100% sure I was awake.
Then this thing starts move towards me, smoothly gliding over my couch as if it wasnt there. I felt like choking, closer it approached, more I couldnt breath. It raised its hand pointing at me. It kept coming at me until its fingers reached my mouth and throath. That's when I woke up couching my lungs out.
I guess I was choking from saliva/slime and that was reflected to my dream. ^^;

Next thing came from....a rather serious problem. It was a hallucination caused by DTs(delirium tremens) wich is caused by serious withdrawal from alcohol. No need to worry, I got help for it.
Well then, this time I woke up in my bed during the night and felt like shit thanks to hangover. I turn around to face middle of living room and then I saw something odd. Like a faintly glowing cloth in the air, moving as if it was underwater gently moved by stream. I sit up on my bed and then I saw it. I'm not sure excatly what I saw, but it was huge, floating around with a somekind long animal skull with deer like antlers followed by more of these shreds of cloths.

Gotta admit that was a such surreal exprienced, I was both terrified and intrigued actually. I reasoned that this couldnt be real and so I was not in a real danger and even if it was and started to act hostile towards me, I'd get away from there.
This whole thing was caused by several days of heavy alcohol drinking and I do not recommend it to anybody and to get help right away like I did.

Korn- Insane:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-zb4C_k7Ek

Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Right off the bat I need to apology(once again).....for ya peeps for not being around and especially to two(you know who ya are ;) ) people that payed me great amounts of money. And after all these years I still haven't delivered for them and it's been eating me up slowly over these years....
Truth is that my artistic skill hasn't grown to what I did expect over this time. And that kind of mindset becomes problem itself....I should, draw and do whatever I find fancy and not overthink how everybody else likes it. The Obvious improvement comes from "just do it" and learning from past mistakes and reflecting on them.

It's been awhile since I had this kind of burn to move forward. I spare you all from the details but severals past years have been.....more or less bleak. But I guess there has always been a small ember burning me to go forward....no matter what. Once I thought to just erase everything and I did. But now I want to correct my mistakes and continue towards whatever comes.

I will contact my two oldest clients, within 24 hours from this post. I need to make things right.

Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

First thing about the commissioned pics.
After so long time not drawing I noticed that my "arting skillz" had decreased(wich was not much before anyway XD). I've been warming it up to get back in the game.
Unfortunatly it hasnt been easy task 'cause of the real life matters. I've been either too tired from work or busy with other stuff.
What I want to do is to give my very best and top peak quality pictures my clients deserve.

My last contract with this one retail shop has ended and they didnt seem too happy about renewing it for some reason or another ^^;
So now I'm left with plenty of time to focus on drawing. Unfortunatly I am terrible with money and did not predict I'd have number 0 shining in my bank account right now.

A guy can live a week without food, but I have already exprienced it couple times and do not recommend it to anybody.



Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Well shit, I'm 25 years old within 15 days....damn time flies by. XD



Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Personally I wouldnt want to take extra work when there is still several unfinished pieces I'm still working on.
But unfortunatly right now I need some money to make it to next paycheck.



Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Apparently 3 years has gone by so fast, and during that time, I've been nothing more than empty husk. I didnt care for anything, I didnt want anything or strive for more. Only thing I've done is just sitting on my corner and drink the problems away.

With all the problems that were more or less selfmade I didnt see light at the end of tunnel anymore, grasping for false hope that things will get better.
Well things havent gotten better and I'm tired.....tired to feel sorry for myself and laying on selfpity.

But last week, something snapped in me, I woke up in the morning and sat on my bed for awhile. I thought "That's enough". I havent felt this alive for loooong time.
I've started to recover slowly in all aspects and this time, I wont stop. I refuse to stop.

All I can say for everybody and especially people that have commissioned me, that I am terribly sorry for all of this bullshit.
I will contact eveybody over a 24h atleast, giving time for me to find all the buried info etc etc.

Anyway, it feels good to be finally back ^^


Commission status: open(working)
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

.........

Commission status: open
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Yeah, peeps give a call if ya'd like some smut or normal stuff drawn for you. ;)

Eh, anyway last month was pretty hectic with all the job hunting and welfare paper wars.
After all that I still find myself jobless and what little money I get I barely can pay apartment and bills....
Funny thing is that this one guy said to me; "move out to other city and try to get job there"
And I reply;" How the fuck I am suppose to do that without money!?"....bastard couldnt say anything back and moved on to next topic.

Well atleast now I can spent 8 hours drawing instead in some boring job..hurrdurr... XD

Commission status: open
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Today I feel good. Actually pretty amazing!

Biggest burden on my shoulders have been lifted and I am finally free. Although things are still slightly critical and such....still this is definitily much better than what I had to deal with before.

I also apology for not being so active at all with art and generally.

Commission status: open
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

-BlackLite-
Keep drawing,dammit! D:<

Yep, made an account over there too. https://www.weasyl.com/profile/blacklite
Ofcourse FA will be my main place to post stuff still. ^^

Commission status: open
Info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/767051/

---

Commish list:(in order to finish)

---

-BlackLite-