I'd give it a solid, "Not Dead Space / 10." Slightly unfair, but unfortunately the comparison has to be made.

Positives: Looks fucking great. Spooky atmosphere. I gotta give particular props to whoever did the 'set dressing.' I don't know what to call it exactly. But it's just a very detailed world in general and the look any individual room was great. Real and lived-in. No spoilers but the story keeps you engaged. It's very interesting

Anyway this game's basic as shit. I haven't played a Bloober Team game, but I know they did a walking sim before this and the SH2 remake, which is naturally very story-heavy. They do a good job of masking it in this game, but it's clear the story was on the forefront of their minds because there's very little mechanical depth to the combat, and encounter design is almost non-existent. Not bad at all, but you lack options which means every encounter is, "shoot them until they die." And also, "shoot all the obvious explosive barrels until they die."

The voice acting is fucking crazy. A bunch of them are Polish, so I think they're just tryna put on American accents and failing. And/or there's a Polish voice director? 🤷‍♀️

Absolutely worth playing, but definitely not fun enough to do all the extras. Your mileage may vary. If you haven't played the Dead Space Remake, and you're into THIS kind of game, you're missing out. Both the remake and original still hold up.

Other times I just want an entire street lined with pokemon whores. Thick, milfy, ladies with lowcut tops, fishnets, gaudy makeup. A PARADE, even. Like Mardi Gras, but half the women are nidoqueen and kangakshan, and you can't move left or right without running face-first into someone titties, or crotch-first in a huge ass. Sexy times in the 'Mosh Pit' is part of the celebration, because with a crowd this rowdy, loud music blaring, people screaming, and rainbow confetti flying everywhere, it's almost impossible to notice a fat lopunny getting spitroasted in the middle of the street.

The more I think about this though, the more I see it as a Independence Holiday for a fictional country with a deep tradition of really good food. Hence the sheer amount of fat pokemon present.

The ones you get in cheap Christmas candy packs? That's what Dot's pussy tastes like.
This is canon.

The jokes been made a thousand times, but I want a character that actually just does that. Maybe that's one of Lucky's powers. You turn around, get jump scared, and get an involuntary boner.

If your boner lasts more than four hours, don't call a doctor. He can't help you. No one can.

It's not REALLY a surprise that people don't know this, but it does make me laugh sometimes seeing the guesses, so:

Without looking, who do you THINK my sona is?

Edit: There sure are a lot of wrong answers in here....( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I've seen/done images of like mewtwo jerking someone off with their mind. It's always fun, but thinking deeply about the mechanics, its hard to wrap your head around. Like what are the PHYSICAL properties psychic energy? They have to exist, (in this fictional context, of course.) Surely that thing would have to be solid to lift someone, for instance, but it doesn't HAVE to be all the time. When you Force Push someone, (ala Star Wars,) it's not like a flat wall is hit them. It's more like a gust of wind, or maybe a wave, (accompanied immediately by a stunt coordinator yanking on their wire.)

All of this is to say that maybe psychics have control of the properties of their powers. You'd want your psychic cushion to be soft if you're catching someone, after all. If you wanted to push someone non-violently, you could use a million microscopic 'bullets' in a tightly compacted, but pliable wave. This is also useful if you're a titless mewtwo who wants to give yourself the biggest tits ever while also keeping them functional. She'd need to wear a shirt at all times though. Seems like some wacky sitcom shenanigans where she has to go to extremes to hide the fact that she has no tits. "Oh s-sure we can have sex. But you have to wear this blindfold the entire time."

Got a weird obsession with characters abusing their positions of power. Particularly when they're thick gals abusing ME:

-The Fat, Middle-aged Landlady who regularly visit her young, struggling tenant and coaxes him into fucking her in the building's laundry room at 2am for rent money.
-Your overbearing, 50-year-old fast food manager, who's gives you favorable positions and hours, so long as you do her, 'favors' during the night shift.
-The owner of the small corner store you work for, who lets you leave work early, so long she can reach down your pants while the customers aren't looking.
-The teacher who sees you struggling and offers one-on-one 'tutoring' sessions, long after hours. Both at the school AND at her home.

All of em in their 40s-70s. Usually physically huge and overbearing and often with tits bigger than your head. This seems like the setup to another one of those porn series where it's all happening to one guy, over and over. The landlord's a cow. His fast food manager is a 4-foot tall cat. The cornerstore owner is a rat. And his teacher's a horse. And of course on the way home, he gets pulled over for a broken tail light by a by a pig cop, and shit goes downhill fast.

And establishing a base near a remote fishing village in a third world country. I would then dump growth hormones into their water so that their population of Jynx/Medicham women would grow twice their size. Just big enough that their gigantic pink lips would cover half my face. And then I'd infest their waters with Bruxish and do pull exactly the same stunt.

There really need to be more pokemon with huge lips.
You know, for no reason in particular.

-Barley speaks any English.
-Probably from Scandinavia or some sht.
-Comes around to your office after hours to pick up trash.
-You're there working late on business'y things
-Become friends by offering leftover food from the company party.
-Become CLOSE friends by sucking her walrus titties in the kitchen.
-Become VERY close friends after eating her out on the company ping pong table.
-Become EXTREMELY close friends by plowing her in the in the janitor closet.

In a rusty, white murder van, offering free candy to random people, and she genuinely does understand why this is a problem. She gets reported to the cops all the time and it's a whole mess, but she's genuinely just trying to give out candy. She's got everything back there. Snickers, Milkway, Sour Patch. Everything in those in little Halloween fun sizes so they fit in a cute gift bags. Nicest clown you'll ever meet. Socially awkward as hell though. Probably looks like a lunch lady.

How much to graphics matter to you? Because, I feel like I'm losing my goddamn mind sometimes. Cards on the table: I was born in early 90s. I grew up with N64 graphics, although the games I first played were on SNES. (Pocky and Rocky, Megaman 7, Sunset Riders, and Bubsy unfortunately, all of which still look good today.) Wouldn't call myself a graphics snob, but they matter. If there were a hierarchy of needs, 'Gameplay' would be number 1, and graphics would be a lot lower on the list, but still 10 top.

All that said, even having grown up during this era, it's mindblowing to me that people want to go ALL the way back. Like I'm seeing games come out with graphics that aren't JUST stylistically retro, they include all the objectively awful parts too. You know, like "literally not being able to tell what you're looking at because it's just blurry, zoomed in pixels on a 3D model." Happens the most with Indie horror games, I find. I know budget plays a massive role here, but some people MAKE that choice.


Yeah yeah, art subjective.

I might just be horny/misremembering things, but I associate witches more with older, thicker women. Thick means heavy, and that means a normal broom ain't gonna cut it. I propose a business that sells Heavy Duty brooms for Heavy Duty women. Very useful for when the thickest donkey witch you've ever seen swoops you up and takes you to her spooky cabin in the forest. Comes with a plush saddle in several colors, speaker attachment with preset songs for settings the mood, and a vibration function!

Nasty Industries is not responsible for any damages incurred by using the vibration function mid-flight.

For entirely unrelated reasons, I'll have you know that all of my ideas, and all the words in this sentence are copyrighted! Except the ones aren't. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

But on a serious note, I do hope my bullshit inspires someone every now and then. This occasionally happens with my characters too, where I see a character that's inspired by one of my own, but with the artist's own twist on it. Sometimes people even ask if they can do so beforehand. I'm stating publicly, it's cool. Go for it. Love it. Same with these dumbfuck ideas I post. idgaf

But if you've seen this pic:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54973510/

I have a weird fetish for people being fucked while trying/being forced to not move. Goes really well with the whole nun fetishthat I can't stop draw recently. I've seen similar-ish things before. Mostly Japanese ones where they like have a girl read a book/poetry or something while there's a vibrator in her. Slowly but surely she loses her shit, and that's kinda neat. I THINK I've seen something similar with a guy too.

Either way, the idea came up because I couldn't stop thinking about an hippo girl trying to practice tuba with my face in between her legs. Starts off normal, punctuated every now and then with her honking out a loud note because she suddenly lose breath control. Longer notes start sputtering and going off key. I'll just let you imagine what happens during the finale. Real degenerate shit.

For unrelated reasons, are any of my followers women, and do you play the tuba? Asking for a friend. If not, what intstrument DO you play? Also asking for a friend. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I hear you. I understand all of your concerns however, have you every asked yourself why there aren't more gorilla librarians? You ever see those libarary ladders people use to access books higher up? Well they need a pole to latch on to toward the top, and if you install them just right, they're perfect for a gorilla to hang off of. She could hang upside, by her feet, and still be access most of the books. Now the real question is, "Why is she dressed like a generic sexy pornstar librarian?" You know, with the lowcut top, short skirt, and sexy glasses? I don't know, but what I DO know is that with her amazing gorilla climbing abilities, she can reach places normal people can't access. More importantly, she can take you with her.

Or just give you a footjob under one of the tables. Gorilla feet are pretty good at that. Gotta keep quiet though.

I get it. I understand your concern, but consider an island full of 20 Ft tall King Kong esque-gorilla women with literally gigantic lips. TITANIC monkey lips. And different tribes have different cultural characteristics. The some are pretty chill. They Do a little farming. Do some hunting of the island's gigantic monster population for food. They get along with the island's population of normal-size human/furries/whatever you want there. I imagine they style themselves kind of like old school Native Americans. And some of them get along VERY well with the their tiny non-monke friends.

And then there's the dickhead gorilla tribe who war with them, and also occasionally steal tiny humans as prizes/tiny husbands/status symbols. It very important to note that these ladies also have gigantic lips, and you MUST kiss the bride. With tongue. Giant monke tongue.

Which is when some influencer in a porn universe sells their house and lives their life hitchhiking down the road to nowhere. Some people do it out kindness. Others needs some...compensation. This usually involves doing 'favors' for fat pig truckers gals in overalls, often on the side of the road, or at various truck stops. But also probably makes for interesting banter during a livestream. Truckers have some pretty cool stories.

To having a really fat girlfriend, who's also into bellyfucking, because in a crowded train scenario, you can be sitting down while she's standing up and still have her belly covering your crotch. Of course you could both be standing too. Then it's easier to hide, because your not RIGHT up her ass like most of the scenarios.

I played HK. Beat it got the secret ending. Liked it. Didn't love it. I'm getting similar feelings from Silksong, though it's feeling a lot worse in the lategame. There's a loooooot to do, and it's getting less and less interesting. I'm getting more tools and more abilities, which is nice, but for what? It certainly ain't for the bosses. I don't remember how difficult they were in HK, but I'm kind of tearing through them this game. So now I beat another boss, get some sht I'm definitely not going to use and just go, 'okay.'

And now I'm 30 something hours in, aimlessly filling out the map, hoping to stumble upon whatever it is that'll get me to the secret ending. (Of course I know there's more after that final boss. She went down in 4 tries and this strikes me as a prequel so that ending didn't make any sense. There's obviously more.) And since I don't know what's necessary and what isn't, I'm just wandering. Just hoping an NPC pops up randomly somewhere. Hoping another Wish appears on the board randomly.

Give a cogwork heart to some robotic asshole. He pops up for a minute to fight and just leaves. We probably meet him again, I guess. But where? Iunno. Wander around for another hour until you randomly find him, asshole. Good luck.

Unlock a guy from a cage. Talk to him later. Where is he now? Is he even necessary for the best ending? Fuck if I know. Better search every inch of the map again. Hope you didn't miss any fleas or forget to mark a spot you need to come back to!

It's just so fucking much.

Other times I think of feeding monster pokemon viagra, putting them in a one-piece swimsuits, and then grinding on them until they cum inside/through their own bathing suits.

You ever see those orgy porn shoots where it's just absolute chaos and there's like 20 people every which direction grabbing on each / sucking each other off? It's kind of like that, but with more rhydon, nidoqueen, and nidoking.

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/48196898/

I will now pretend this is just another of Freeza's race, who happens to just like being in this form all the time. Apparently Freeza himself was based off of predatory landlords, which satisfies my fetish for old, caked women fucking me in my own apartment in exchange for rent money. Except in this case, she owns my entire planet, and will blow it up if I don't blast all over her alien tits.

Team Rocket, (or whoever the fuck it is these days,) usually just tries to steal Pokemon and...I guess sell them on the black market or some shit? (Did they ever make that clear?) Me, I'm putting chemicals in the water to make the Toxicroak and Politoeds gay. Also genetically modifying the trees to produce fruit with growth hormones that make nidoqueen/kangaskhan tits bigger. Probably makes some other things bigger, but caring about these things is very un-super-villain-like.

Or maybe I need to establish a secret breeding facilities to do these sort of things. Though to be fair, the Pokemon world is dumb as fuck and I think I could do this in public, no problem. Become the Umbrella of the Pokemon universe. And then sell the milk from our nidoqueen's titties, which ALSO contains growth hormones. Now that's some super villain shit, unless you specifically only sell it to farms FOR the purpose of giving pokemon bigger tits to milk.

Saw this video which made me laugh a little:
https://youtu.be/Z_97dWIQ4lA?si=XOBIxvfq9ca6b2dy
He tries to make this as unappealing as possible, going as far as to pick the fattest dragon he could find, and everyone in the comments is like, "Yes. Absolutely. Where do I sign up?"

Got me thinking though. Not every reaction would be the same. Dragon's for all intents and purpose, just people in D&D (depending on which ones you're talking about, of course.) They got personalities. Wants, needs, etc. So while some Dragons would definitely treat you as property, others you could absolutely have a Shrek-style relationship with. Go out. Have an adventure. Just make sure to visit home once in a while. (At the top of a mountain.) Bring your dragon girlfriend some shinies every now and then. Sit down with each other and share the story about how you have to Shoryuken a Mindflayer to get that gold.

The whole 'hoard of jewels thing' would make it hard to find a suitable ring though. Gotta make it special. "I ripped this gem out of a Demi-Lich's eye with my bare fucking hands. I then traveled halfway across the world to find a dwarf who could fashion it into a ring big enough to fit your tail. Will you marry me?"

I'd like to remind everyone that there are multiple ways for dragons to change shape in D&D. For no reason in particular. 👀

With your Hypno friend whose dressed as a schoolgirl because she wants to live out her, 'molested by a stranger on public transit' fetish. So you push her up against the window, get behind her, and just put your fingers in there. The more crowded the train, the better. Also works really, well with your drowzee dickgirl friend, but is slightly less discrete. SUPER less discrete when she blasts the train door with her goo. Might want to try that one at night.

They'll keep coming back to your isolated cabin in the woods expecting more food. And then they'll bring their friends, who will hang out in your jacuzzi while the otherl press their beach ball-sized tits against the glass until you feed them again. And this just keeps happening until eventually they just start letting themselves in, drizzling honey all over your dick, and licking it clean in pairs.