I have a bad habit of finding good, affordable artists and then just force feed them money for a string of several months until I run out of ideas. And then move on.

I try to spread the love more evenly.... but then I come back and like it's hard to get a slot!

Every. Time.

I'm still asocial as fuck.

Hello.

New Years Resolution check in.

Most certainly failing.

Oh look, it's a journal from that bird, with the Kulve Taroth you occasionally see a lot, who doesn't talk much. Like. At all. Ever. Even when approached.

Yeah, I am really bad at being... talkative. Like there's being socially awkward. Then there's socially incapable. I am socially impossible.

So, here I am, hoping to mostly change that. That's the resolution for the year. To stop being someone okay with being background scenery. Hopefully, I can ascend to foreground scenery. But, you know, only time will really tell.

But, anyways. That's my hope. The resolution. Be less... just face. And balance it out with voice.


Oh right, and Happy New Year, everyone. Hopefully this time it'll be....
Lemme not Jinx it.

Pretty sure that's the last of it. At least I can't think of anything else that I want to share.

As I've said time and time again, I don't plan on posting any extreme content on here or even the other profile. So you'll have to look elsewhere for that.

Gonna dump a lot of stuff in scraps. Most of it's old. Feel like freeing up some space on my computer, though I know someone's gonna want to look back on some of this stuff I've done/gotten for them. Because it always seems to happen...

Been wondering if I should start adding all the art I've gotten for others or if I should just leave it as the things I've gotten in regards to my own characters.

Decisions decisions.... Obviously if they're posted by people who actually are on here I wouldn't.


And before people start asking about the other stuff I've gotten.... It's still a no. Both here and on the other account. You know what the question is.

I'm not don't a Lady Dimitrescu comm.

Had plans for it before but now it's just gonna feel like I'm following the trend.

Too easy. So no. Nope. Not happening.

Just trying to unremind myself I'm not much a social person.

The wallowing in self-loathing is as normal as it comes. But even I know it's childish to try and wear it like a badge in front of everyone. Thus we do the favor of pushing the stupid down.

Thus, moving on.

I mean.... I really am though. Not that I try to be. Being social and relevant is.... difficult. And having a mind as conflicted as mind just complicates the process ten fold.

I don't know how to talk, engage, or just be friendly with people. I used to be better, but that's been bleeding off over time.

Who even could tell what it is. I'm honestly surrounded by a great amount of wonderful people. Surrounded myself, even. I know this. And yet, I still find it ever harder to open up.

If you're reading this, and we used to chat it up, I'm not asking you to forgive me for simply disappearing, going silent, or acting distant. I've slowly forgotten how to be... outgoing.

A halloween ych that wasn't witch based.

THIS year.

The bombardment of art will recommence after I sleep.


For you few wondering.... the one's know who what I'm about.... no, the extreme stuff is NOT coming FA. To this page or the other one. Sorry.

Pretty weird following a profile that doesn't post anything, don't ya think?

Personally, I'm not going to draw anymore. It served a purpose once before, now no longer. I don't need to create when I've the funds and the access to better. And personally, I don't want to get better. My desire to draw was fleeting at best. It wasn't something I enjoyed so much others enjoyed, and it was a way for me to give back to my friends when I felt simply saying it wasn't enough. But if you came here to watch me on my "road to being a better artist," that road essentially ended sometime last year.

I don't even plan to post my commissions here. Favorite them, sure, but you'll likely never get a notification of activity from me again.

Want to start doing worse stuff. Extreme things like toilet play/blood/gore. Don't know if I should make a third account for that or not... well second, considering that the first is going to stay closed.

For anyone paying attention to the seemingly inconsistency of skill, these pictures I'm uploading right now are anywhere from a few months, a few days, to a few years old. Granted, I'm not really much an artist. But I figured I'd just throw the gem out there.

Some of you might recognize the pictures from being here earlier. I am  shdbird and I decided it was time to move away from the old hardly used profile and start fresh.