So...we have a rat. A single half-hooded half desert palm rat. It's sneaking around our house being a total dick. We have traps out. It just freaked out my mom in her bedroom. So I transferred a trap to her room. Baited it, and promptly snapped it onto my middle and ring fingers of my offhand.

HOLY FUCKING HELL THAT HURT. I have a minor cut, and a nice bruise, but I can fully move everything just fine. Jeebus H Vishnu that really really smarts tho....

And I can't stop laughing my ass off right now. 🤣🤣🤣


EDIT: Pardon the weirdness. I posted this at 4:30am. Zero sleep. -.-!

EDIT 2: My old Xbox had a brain fart. I just lost almost ten YEARS of Borderlands 3 weapons all saved up in a massive 360 item bank. All of it gone. The bank reset itself. And the lost loot machine reduced to nothing as well. All my current characters were just fine. But all my levelling loot...my Mayhem guns, my uniques. Shields, trinkets, SKINS. All of it is gone. I'm literally in tears of all that work down the shitter. Because my system is old and I am broke and can't afford anything.

I originally was against them, for odd reasons. Then I realized...they are basically commissions that no one has commissioned me for. So, why don't I try some? And get back to drawing all that I owe. Sheeeesh that's a decently large pile. And no one say I don't have to. My personal honor and pride demand it. 😅

Btw, $25k in debt due to new roofing, and my benefits disappearing (thanks Republicans) mean that, yeah, I gotta try something.

Roof has had to be totally replaced. We are now skint broke, but at least we have shelter and food and electricity for now. So that is...mostly good?

But now, the f**ktard in chief has made it so my SNAP benefits disappear in a month. Half my food budget, already straining. Lovely. Time for soups and stews since we won't be able to afford jack shit in this wonderful great economy. Thanks, you bastard in chief.

Stressed, not sleeping well, sick, and generally depressed. But wanna know something? I actually am doing okay. Is that wierd? Maybe I'm used to it finally? Anyhow. I am gonna take tomorrow and try to draw again.

Well, there went all my monies. We are getting an entirely new roof. Cause the fuckers who did our roof twice over, never did it up to code. So, we have to get the whole damn thing re-done. Wiped out mom and my own savings. Completely. And we will still be paying off the loan ten years from now. Fuck. My. Life. But at least the roof will be good for the rest of my life. Warranted to boot. 🙂

And something else that now has me laughing till I am crying...Republicans are now demanding a nationwide gun registry. Wrap some teeth around that. I am still trying to. Without laughing. Which o have to do or I will cry.

I've been stressed massively over my blood sugar and diabetes type 2 diagnosis. Been strict with diet and exercise, losing a LOT of weight since January. Almost a quarter of my mass, even. Holy shit. It all came to roost. My A1C was at 7.4 in May...as of yesterday...I knocked that bitch down to 6.8. no medicine increase or change, just diet and exercise. Holy shit. I am as I said, over the gyat dayamned Moon!!!

🤣🤣🤣

Yeah, I got a kiss-off letter when I applied for dealer's den space. And artist alley space. I really should just say dealer's den at this point, since there isn't really that much of a difference. I guess I should give it up then. Cons have deteriorated massively. No longer any fandom love for the traditional artists who MADE this fandom. Least that's what I see, inbetween all the trinkets, baubles, stickers, and such. And don't get me started on AI generated crap.

What really frosts me though, is I thought I was on their mailing list, and never even received notifications about the convention, after my "we're sorry, but our adult section of the dealer's den is full now." letter. *Shrug* If I had, maybe one of us could have at least shown up. Who knows. But yeah, pissed off yet again, so I am debating even supporting the western cons, anymore. I have found them...wanting.

I try to access Discord, I start it up, and I get the black logo on white background...then it shifts to white on black, and greyed out messages appear, a "channel is read only" message appears, and then it shuts down, knocking me back to main phone screen.

Also, I can't seem to access Google very well, Reddit is completely laggy to the point nothing loads, and I don't know wtf is going on. Earlier, everything was working fine.

The phone works. Texting is wierd. All my contacts have reverted names to phone numbers. It's all just wtf confusing. HELP!!!

UPDATE: The weirdness concluded when I went into Android Messenger and simply re-created a contact. Added a name, then backed back out. All the contacts restored themselves. Google suddenly worked even better. Reddit is still crap, but c'mon. It's Reddit. And Discord? Suddenly just perfect. It was the weirdest shit ever to happen. I made sure though, that I have everything backed up onto either the SIM card I have, or the little portable thumb drive I have. Thank goodness for that.

I try to access Discord, I start it up, and I get the black logo on white background...then it shifts to white on black, and greyed out messages appear, a "channel is read only" message appears, and then it shuts down, knocking me back to main phone screen.

Also, I can't seem to access Google very well, Reddit is completely laggy to the point nothing loads, and I don't know wtf is going on. Earlier, everything was working fine.

The phone works. Texting is wierd. All my contacts have reverted names to phone numbers. It's all just wtf confusing. HELP!!!

Soooo many artists open for commissions...
And what happens? Bro is on the hospital for heart failure and COPD. Our clothes washing machine blows out its transmission. and once again, my nephew steals from my mom to cover his debts and lifestyle cause he has the money handling abilities of a mushroom.

Joy. And. Fucking. Rapture.

And people wonder why I can't even lift pencil to paper except to work work work? Sigh. Anyone got a nice oak baseball bat I can beat some heads on with?

...because simple shit, like keeping my dog from licking a salesman to death, ends up with me in the ER, nursing some torn shoulder muscles. Owwie.


The worst part is, it's my art arm. So, it's difficult to draw. But...not impossible. 😈

Plus I am seriously stubborn.

I only knew him on FM, Nynaeve knew him from FC...we are both deeply saddened to hear of his passing. A legend, an OG fur...he WAS FurryMuck...and we are all lessened by his passing...

Why the f**k is Furaffinity steering me to Google via actually website switching? I am browsing FA, then boom! Switch over to Google. It's farking annoying. Nothing on my phone to do that, so it's either something in Android, or FA.

Black Sabbath Frontman Ozzy Osbourne has passed away at 76 years too young.

I'm broken right now. He was one of my all time favs.

List your favorite Ozzy songs down below.

Mine...whooooboy.

Warpigs, Crazy Train, Mr. Crowley, Perry Mason, No More Tears, Time After Time, and of course, his duet with Lemmy for Hellraiser 39th anniversary and the animated video for it. There are more.

He will be very missed, that brain-fried, mush-mouthed, coked up scion of the devil! Rick on, Ozzy. Tear up the afterlife.

Apparently, Brian O'Connell has passed. Steve Martin announced it. I...really dunno what to say. I am at a complete loss.

EDIT: And I guarantee you the new furry community at large, will barely even notice. When did I become so jaded at something I love so much?

...was a nice place to sell art to people who appreciated our talents.

Now, I can't even get my mojo on, despite art block finally deciding to recede.

Anyhow, here are some random things we've built. 40k stuff incoming!

Shet...I need to retake a bunch of pics....

Downtown LA is a no-go zone. Rioting fires damage and chaos. LAPD, not the national guard or Marines, has shut off as much access as they can. Yup. Pretty fucking bad.

Hegseth wants to send in the Marines. I have seen all the legal shit against that. It will remain to be seen if he actually goes through with it.

It's bad. Very bad. And the truth is, it wasn't the protesters who did this shit. Professional rioters and rabble-rousers just wanting to add to the tragedy.

I just wish we could do something to stop this. Anyhow, Nynaeve and I are safe, with plenty of bug-out options. No worries. Of course, since I work in downtown...Wtf do I do tomorrow?

A friend of Nynaeve's pointed out to him something amazing. The prohibitions on pre-made stuff in Anthrocon's Artist Alley. And...that is currently what is wrong with so many other conventions.

See, to me, Artist Alley has always been about the artist and their talent. Their works and projects already completed are secondary. As an artist, if you wanted to sell pre-made stuff, get a vending table. The alley was a place to showcase your talent, not your goods, as it were.

And at most if not all conventions still having an artist alley, gaming, anime, furry cons alike, this difference ... No longer exists. The artist alleys are just more vendors selling pre-made goods. AFC, Anime LA and Riverside, Anime Pasadena, even the big cons, They are all doing this.

As I said before, traditional artists and artist alleys, are a dying breed.

Just too damn bad we can't make it to Anthrocon...

Furry Weekend LA got cancelled on us over here. We had hopes. Not really surprised, though, as this past and current month , our area was SLAMMED with conventions. End of last month up to just this past weekend we had gaming cons, Pasadena ComicCon, Anime Riverside, Monsterpalooza, Anime Riverside, and NostalgiaCon coming up...it's possibly the worst time to try and open up a con in California.

But we had hopes this con would be different. Maybe better then the current crop of crap we see at EVERY convention now. Anime Riverside...where the Artist Alley looked exactly like the Dealer's Hall...same exact stuff being sold. But at least a few more traditional artists working. But I guess it's true. There just isn't really space for us or the market for us, at cons, anymore.

Yeah, we applied for a table at Another Furry Con. In the adult section. Just got informed we weren't accepted. Mind you, last year there were THREE vendors in that section. Three. Total. One sex toy manufacturer. One guy selling collars n cuffs. And ONE traditional artist. That was IT.

So. What? No room for another artist? Would rather have a convention dealer hall focused on keychains and stickers, crappy AI art, and clothing? I guess it's true. At conventions, traditional artists really aren't wanted anymore.

And this has me deeply saddened. In tears. We really need the business over here, and it's just not there anymore.

And the BULLSHIT about not having space...FFS, the dealers den was LITERALLY half empty! They could expand EASILY. FUCK.

Ever since FC and their "Juried artist selection process", cons have been pure shite for us as dealers and artists. Not just furry cons either. We MADE the fandom. Without our money, these cons wouldn't even fucking exist. and to be treated like this just rankles me bad.

Imma gonna go eat some sugar free crap and sulk now. Probably never get to sell at cons again unless I want to delve into chotchki's and crap. Ugh.

EDIT: "In an effort to manage hundreds of applications, we have already compiled our wait-list. Please apply next year."

Hundreds? I have my doubts, but who knows? I might as well give up applying, because this feels just like FC's pick-and-chpose Juried bullshit, but a lot more hidden. Come on. You had THREE Adult vendors. You are telling me you couldn't slide in a few more? Yeeeesh. Yeah, their response just managed to piss me off further. My belief? Traditional art at cons is dead, AND THE CONS KILLED IT.

Never realized how much I needed my furry art fix until it is gone. I really need to learn other galleries. DA not included. Fookin' nothing but AI generated crap....

Does anyone know why some art is blurred out for me? Goes normal if I click on it, but I don't think I've clicked on anything to set up a censor? Besides, most of the raunchy stuff is uncensored. Yet a simple bit of cleavage gets blurred? Wtf?


UPDATE= The Busty Tag was clicked on for some stupid reason. Knowing my predilections, why would I want to exclude those pics? Lol! Rectified however. Thanks Llyander!

But ...
I forgot her braid.
I need to take better pics.
Get cracking on some older ideas.
I love you all!

Will someone please tell the US president and VP, and all their bootlicking sycophants that a vast majority of the entire fricking world is sick and fricking tired of their rampant disrespect, bigotry and hatred spewing from their mouths?

Sorry. Had to vent. Someone chucked me a bunch of political articles in my YouTube feed and I read some of them. Migraine ensued.

Yeah. Another year, survived. Can't say more then that. Full of disappointments, still fighting art block and depression, tooth and claw. But I am still around. So that is a big plus. Still, woulda been nice if family remembered beyond a text or casual wave. A cake might be nice...even a card. But... nuthin'. Cept Nyn. He made the day good. So count my blessing. 😊👍

I hate it when a comment or journal I have commented on is removed. Dunno the reasons, and I am sure they were good ones. It just rankles. It's like, I don't have too many places I put down thoughts or words, and now one of them is gone. I don't remember what I said or what it was about...and that bugs me to no end.

Ain't that wierd? Amongst SO much of my life that is normal...(/Sarcasm spasm)