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(Hopefully) Going to MFF at the end of this year!
Posted 2 years agoHello! This is sort of an announcement, but... if all goes well, I'll hopefully be attending MFF in Dec this year!
It will be my first furry convention outside of Canada! I'm incredibly excited to go! Been wanting to since 2020.
Luckily I've already planned who I'm going to room with, but I'm INCREDIBLY excited to go to MFF, for the first ever time. I have heard it's chaos, but honestly, I feel like I at least need to experience it once in my life, and at least for me, I'm going to get to physically meet my friends I've seen in VR so much.
I am hyped, but also a little scared due to not knowing the area, and the fact it's in an entirely different country, as this would be my first time going to the US entirely alone. It's entirely out of my comfort zone, but I'm not going to let that stop me, because it's time for me to experience something entirely different to what I'm used to.
Why am I announcing this now though? Well, I need to really plan ahead for something like this, so I'm doing that.
Granted, right now it's not entirely guaranteed yet, but I'm working as hard as I can to make it happen. If it does happen, this will probably not be a normal thing I attend, but I need to go at least once!
I'm hyped.
It will be my first furry convention outside of Canada! I'm incredibly excited to go! Been wanting to since 2020.
Luckily I've already planned who I'm going to room with, but I'm INCREDIBLY excited to go to MFF, for the first ever time. I have heard it's chaos, but honestly, I feel like I at least need to experience it once in my life, and at least for me, I'm going to get to physically meet my friends I've seen in VR so much.
I am hyped, but also a little scared due to not knowing the area, and the fact it's in an entirely different country, as this would be my first time going to the US entirely alone. It's entirely out of my comfort zone, but I'm not going to let that stop me, because it's time for me to experience something entirely different to what I'm used to.
Why am I announcing this now though? Well, I need to really plan ahead for something like this, so I'm doing that.
Granted, right now it's not entirely guaranteed yet, but I'm working as hard as I can to make it happen. If it does happen, this will probably not be a normal thing I attend, but I need to go at least once!
I'm hyped.
2022 is a shitty year
Posted 3 years agoWell, TLDR. I lost my childhood home in Feb.
Luckily I wasn't living there, I'm safe at my grandparents place but my mom got evicted from her house, because she didn't clean the place in 2 years. My mom is a hoarder. I lost a lot of stuff I had, I did salvage everything I could get, but I couldn't get everything. The place was a wreck. Cockroaches everywhere. Some of my stuff was partly destroyed, like some of the costumes I made. All because my mom didn't clean the place. I am missing my home.
Computer also died in Feb. Luckily built a new one.
Also got banned from YT.
Everything pretty much went to shit. I am still NOT OKAY from losing my childhood home.
That's where I made most of my art as well you know, heck it's where I started drawing. As i type this i miss my room.
Ugh, i need to sleep. Sorry for this vent journal and i've been trying to keep this inside but it's too much. I need to tell people about it.
I miss my home.
Luckily I wasn't living there, I'm safe at my grandparents place but my mom got evicted from her house, because she didn't clean the place in 2 years. My mom is a hoarder. I lost a lot of stuff I had, I did salvage everything I could get, but I couldn't get everything. The place was a wreck. Cockroaches everywhere. Some of my stuff was partly destroyed, like some of the costumes I made. All because my mom didn't clean the place. I am missing my home.
Computer also died in Feb. Luckily built a new one.
Also got banned from YT.
Everything pretty much went to shit. I am still NOT OKAY from losing my childhood home.
That's where I made most of my art as well you know, heck it's where I started drawing. As i type this i miss my room.
Ugh, i need to sleep. Sorry for this vent journal and i've been trying to keep this inside but it's too much. I need to tell people about it.
I miss my home.
Banned from youtube.
Posted 4 years agoHey! so, I was recently banned from youtube. Sadly, over there ANY type of inflation is seen as "Graphic sexual content", which... well, I have nothing to say. I saw other people uploading videos of inflation over on youtube and I thought i was safe because they were doing it too, Turns out nope.
What's crazy is they didn't even give me a warning. It was just... BOOM YOUR CHANNEL IS REMOVED AND ALL THE VIDEOS ARE GONE, NOT TO MENTION YOUR OTHER ACCOUNTS ARE GOING TO GET BANNED BECAUSE YOU UPLOADED "GRAPHIC SEXUAL CONTENT". Really, it was unfair. Again, I was not given a warning. If youtube wanted me to get rid of my videos then they should of just removed the videos and gave me a warning. I would of gladly accepted if my videos needed to be removed. Just... What the hell youtube.
The length this ban goes to is absurd, I didn't even get a chance to speak to youtube until they banned me with no warning. There was absolutely no indication of anything I could of done.
Just, don't do what I did. Don't upload inflation to youtube, even if you've seen others upload stuff. There, it's seen as sexual always.
If i do end up getting my channel back (i'm planning to try to appeal and have them delete all my videos but get my account back) I'd be scared to even be me on youtube. I considered streaming stuff to twitch but I'm scared to do that too. Probably going to upload those videos onto furrynetwork or something though.
What's crazy is they didn't even give me a warning. It was just... BOOM YOUR CHANNEL IS REMOVED AND ALL THE VIDEOS ARE GONE, NOT TO MENTION YOUR OTHER ACCOUNTS ARE GOING TO GET BANNED BECAUSE YOU UPLOADED "GRAPHIC SEXUAL CONTENT". Really, it was unfair. Again, I was not given a warning. If youtube wanted me to get rid of my videos then they should of just removed the videos and gave me a warning. I would of gladly accepted if my videos needed to be removed. Just... What the hell youtube.
The length this ban goes to is absurd, I didn't even get a chance to speak to youtube until they banned me with no warning. There was absolutely no indication of anything I could of done.
Just, don't do what I did. Don't upload inflation to youtube, even if you've seen others upload stuff. There, it's seen as sexual always.
If i do end up getting my channel back (i'm planning to try to appeal and have them delete all my videos but get my account back) I'd be scared to even be me on youtube. I considered streaming stuff to twitch but I'm scared to do that too. Probably going to upload those videos onto furrynetwork or something though.
What i did during 2021
Posted 4 years agoHello! I've been super inactive on FA, mostly because well... I've been spending a lot of my time in VR making things, and well, to be honest i've been making a lot of inflation systems in NeosVR as well as recreating weapons and developing games in it, learning programming and such and... it's really gotten to be fun to learn all that.
Me and a bunch of friends also won a competition in NeosVR, we made a game in it called "Abandonware", which was kind of like a ps1 style horror game (inspired off of silent hill).
I'm also working on a model i'm going to sell for VRchat and neos, and... well, though this pandemic made me really depressed at times, i've... found some really good friends and picked up some skills like programming and 3d. Really in 2021 i focused on learning 3d more and i made a few character models (Pony, yoshi, dragon, finishing up my fem foorox right now) and i spent a lot of the time slowly learning blender. These past few years i barely knew how to use blender but during the end of 2020 and the start of 2021 i really started to get the hang of it, and nowadays i really know my way around (Mostly, still need to learn lots).
(Also when i was starting out in 2020 and early 2021... I really thank
MondoMonger for all the knowledge he gave to me when starting out. He literally sat down for hours with me on a discord call and taught me so much, and... well, i'll forever miss him in my heart because he unexpectedly passed away in 2021. He was... an amazing friend and i didn't talk to him enough. I knew him IRL too. I'll just... forever miss him.)
In 2021 i sorta felt crappy i didn't draw as much but i guess i was doing other things to offset it like programming. I'm a little out of practice with drawing but i'm definitely trying to get back into it!
I just feel like i'm one of those people who isn't good at one particular thing, but tries all sorts of different things, trying everything they find interesting. Since i have ADHD if ANYTHING looks interesting to me i'm going to try it. It's weird and i've had a lot of people think that i'm strange because of it but, i honestly don't feel like it's really a bad thing.
Anyway, i hope this journal is okay to post, it's just, i've been finding out more about what i like to do. I'm really in this weird phase where i'm thinking of what i should do next.
Me and a bunch of friends also won a competition in NeosVR, we made a game in it called "Abandonware", which was kind of like a ps1 style horror game (inspired off of silent hill).
I'm also working on a model i'm going to sell for VRchat and neos, and... well, though this pandemic made me really depressed at times, i've... found some really good friends and picked up some skills like programming and 3d. Really in 2021 i focused on learning 3d more and i made a few character models (Pony, yoshi, dragon, finishing up my fem foorox right now) and i spent a lot of the time slowly learning blender. These past few years i barely knew how to use blender but during the end of 2020 and the start of 2021 i really started to get the hang of it, and nowadays i really know my way around (Mostly, still need to learn lots).
(Also when i was starting out in 2020 and early 2021... I really thank
MondoMonger for all the knowledge he gave to me when starting out. He literally sat down for hours with me on a discord call and taught me so much, and... well, i'll forever miss him in my heart because he unexpectedly passed away in 2021. He was... an amazing friend and i didn't talk to him enough. I knew him IRL too. I'll just... forever miss him.)In 2021 i sorta felt crappy i didn't draw as much but i guess i was doing other things to offset it like programming. I'm a little out of practice with drawing but i'm definitely trying to get back into it!
I just feel like i'm one of those people who isn't good at one particular thing, but tries all sorts of different things, trying everything they find interesting. Since i have ADHD if ANYTHING looks interesting to me i'm going to try it. It's weird and i've had a lot of people think that i'm strange because of it but, i honestly don't feel like it's really a bad thing.
Anyway, i hope this journal is okay to post, it's just, i've been finding out more about what i like to do. I'm really in this weird phase where i'm thinking of what i should do next.
Would you commission me?
Posted 4 years agoSo, I've just been wanting to see if i could gauge interest for commissions, because I've been wanting to because money is a little low, I have a little backlog i need to do first before I do anyone's comms but I am just curious when i'm done with those, would you want to commission me?
Depression
Posted 4 years agoDepression... it's something i've been dealing with for a while but not really showing people. I have a really stupid habit of comparing myself to other people, and it's been sorta killing me mentally. I've been trying to really improve on that part and convince myself that i can't compare myself to others, Really it's unfair, the comparisons i make. It's mostly to do with art skill because i often feel like i'm behind everyone, but I know that i *can't* compare myself to others, I can only compare myself to myself.
It's not easy getting a new mentality in your head though and i wish it was that simple. Pushing myself to continue art is extremely hard and I want to draw, but self comparison can be a piece of crap because it makes you not even want to try and give up. I've still been drawing though and i want to keep at it, but to be honest drawing used to be super fun when I had the mentality of being a "beginner", I have been drawing since... start of 2016 now? I don't know, and it's making me feel like i'm behind. Maybe i just learn slower than others, which i've been thinking is the case, though my fear of failure is probably the biggest fear I have.
I still enjoy drawing but it's harder to finish things nowadays. Especially because of the pandemic. The pandemic has been killing my mentality and I wish it didn't.
Mostly what i've been doing though during the pandemic is trying to help grow a VR platform called NeosVR. VR has kind of been my... escape from reality during the pandemic, and i literally haven't been out of the house since the beginning of this year (or last year, i forget) ADHD is making it so time is non-existent. Hours can feel like a few minutes to me, and... to be honest I'm writing this journal at 8:22 in the morning and i have yet to sleep.
I honestly feel like i'm losing my mind. I don't want to become crazy at all or anything but... all of this shit just because of a stupid virus. I didn't know staying indoors for so long could do this to me. Life was going great until COVID-19 hit, Right before it hit I had a cool teaching job, I was doing great with university, I was drawing a lot, I loved most things about how my life was going. I was on task, I was punctual, I was doing amazing stuff, I was out and about every day doing things, went to a convention, It was amazing. But then covid 19 showed up. Screw covid 19.
It's not easy getting a new mentality in your head though and i wish it was that simple. Pushing myself to continue art is extremely hard and I want to draw, but self comparison can be a piece of crap because it makes you not even want to try and give up. I've still been drawing though and i want to keep at it, but to be honest drawing used to be super fun when I had the mentality of being a "beginner", I have been drawing since... start of 2016 now? I don't know, and it's making me feel like i'm behind. Maybe i just learn slower than others, which i've been thinking is the case, though my fear of failure is probably the biggest fear I have.
I still enjoy drawing but it's harder to finish things nowadays. Especially because of the pandemic. The pandemic has been killing my mentality and I wish it didn't.
Mostly what i've been doing though during the pandemic is trying to help grow a VR platform called NeosVR. VR has kind of been my... escape from reality during the pandemic, and i literally haven't been out of the house since the beginning of this year (or last year, i forget) ADHD is making it so time is non-existent. Hours can feel like a few minutes to me, and... to be honest I'm writing this journal at 8:22 in the morning and i have yet to sleep.
I honestly feel like i'm losing my mind. I don't want to become crazy at all or anything but... all of this shit just because of a stupid virus. I didn't know staying indoors for so long could do this to me. Life was going great until COVID-19 hit, Right before it hit I had a cool teaching job, I was doing great with university, I was drawing a lot, I loved most things about how my life was going. I was on task, I was punctual, I was doing amazing stuff, I was out and about every day doing things, went to a convention, It was amazing. But then covid 19 showed up. Screw covid 19.
Thinking of moving
Posted 5 years agoHiya!
So... i've owned this account since 2016.
A lot has changed about me since then. The name of this account doesn't really reflect me anymore either. I'm not strictly a fox anymore and it's sort of a leftover, plus i have a lot of older works here when i was really bad at art. I may abandon this account and make a new one for "ModernBalloonie" which is more "myself" now.
I've been going by "ModernBalloonie" everywhere besides FA and it's a little strange.
I won't delete this account if i decide to move, but I sort of want a fresh new start on FA. I want to share my newer work, and basically stuff from 2020 onwards.
I'll be thinking about moving and making a new account.
So... i've owned this account since 2016.
A lot has changed about me since then. The name of this account doesn't really reflect me anymore either. I'm not strictly a fox anymore and it's sort of a leftover, plus i have a lot of older works here when i was really bad at art. I may abandon this account and make a new one for "ModernBalloonie" which is more "myself" now.
I've been going by "ModernBalloonie" everywhere besides FA and it's a little strange.
I won't delete this account if i decide to move, but I sort of want a fresh new start on FA. I want to share my newer work, and basically stuff from 2020 onwards.
I'll be thinking about moving and making a new account.
Art Uploaded
Posted 6 years agoI actually have a LOT more stuff that I have made but it's... like 200 pictures and it would take WAY TOO LONG to upload all of them. They are also all sketches. I've also moved to a new art program and I have a surface pro, so if you're wondering why my new art looks different, i'm using clip studio now. It's a really good program, but SAI won't work with my surface so i'm kinda stuck with that. Anyway. I'm probably not going to upload the huge amount of sketches i've done, but maybe I can make like, a dropbox folder for you guys to see for sketches. Is that a good idea?
Account sort of dead, Art not updated in a while.
Posted 6 years agoTitle, Well, i'm thinking of moving accounts but i don't know. I haven't uploaded like 200 pictures to this account, plus i'm not really "ModernTheFox" anymore, i'm "ModernBalloonie" now, a bit of a name change. But i don't really know. I am still active on twitter though, If you want to follow me, I'm: https://twitter.com/ModernBalloonie
Wondering if anyone is going to vancoufur this year :o
Posted 7 years agoJust curious if anyone is.
Comissions fully open!
Posted 7 years agoBirthday! Squeak!
Posted 7 years agoWell, technically yesterday was my birthday, but i didnt post it here, ah well xP
Sketch Comission form
Posted 7 years agoIf you want an uncolored sketch, go look at this form.
https://goo.gl/forms/Roflj7vaNSDmbFFB2
sketches are 10usd
https://goo.gl/forms/Roflj7vaNSDmbFFB2
sketches are 10usd
Going to Vancoufur 2018
Posted 7 years agoSo, I'm going to vancoufur 2018, Just figured i would say that here because, why not. Also, if you want to see more art and stuff, go and follow my twitter, I'm much more active there.
Twitter link: https://twitter.com/ModernBalloonie
Anyway, yeah.
Twitter link: https://twitter.com/ModernBalloonie
Anyway, yeah.
Birthday
Posted 8 years agoso apparantly i'm a year older now, cool i guess?
who would want to do a trade?
Posted 8 years agocomment if you want to. ill only be accepting one cause im kinda experementing with it.
so, i got a question for you guys.
Posted 8 years agowhat is your favorite aspect about my art? comment below!
puffy icon raffle winner!
Posted 8 years agoalright, the winner is..... 
turtwig10 !!!
turtwig10 !!!hey! who wants a free puffy icon?
Posted 8 years agoreply to here if you want to get a puffy icon! ill only be picking one person though. ill pick on may 5th.
Going to VF2017!
Posted 8 years agoheya guys. im going to vancoufur 2017! and well, im excited to meet new people there, this DOES happen to be my first convention too! so yeah!
thing is, i cant really afford a badge right now, so i am just going to have to settle printing an existing pic and use that as a badge, but i think it will work out fine.
anyway! i hope i meet some cool people there!
thing is, i cant really afford a badge right now, so i am just going to have to settle printing an existing pic and use that as a badge, but i think it will work out fine.
anyway! i hope i meet some cool people there!
my inflatable discord server! :o
Posted 9 years agoModern inflation series delayed.
Posted 9 years agohey! im working on a new design for the squeaky fox, just you wait for it!
test
Posted 9 years agotesting
