IT'S MY MUTHA FUCKIN BIRTHDAY TOMORROW!!



FUCK YEAH!



GOING TO TRICK OR TREAT.
GET JACKED UP ON CANDY.
PRANCE AROUND IN A CORONER COSTUME.
WHO WANTS TO PLAY DEAD?!??!


YES.


BIRTHDAY CAKE.




ALL CAPS TO EMPHASIZE MY EXCITEMENT AND PARTYING.



-Mort

a girl just face planted into my crotch
i was in pain
she was embarrassed






pretty much like every other blow job ive ever got

my birthday is coming up on Halloween!


trying to come up with a costume idea.
i went with Rupee the other day to check out some costumes and i could pretty much be:
a chef, doctor, fireman, police man, bell hop, gangster or a midget. I mean elf. (yes, they had Christmas costumes for some reason) i couldnt even fucking be Santa.


i know there are better costumes out there. TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD WEAR.


and then i shall go trick or treating to celebrate my birthday. or just dick around downtown.




but here's the CATCH!

DRAW ME IN THAT COSTUME!!!

(only if you guys are up for it, you don't really have to, i just enjoy playing dress up and seeing myself in other people's styles)


-Mort

glad i got outta new orleans before the storm hit.
also glad the west coast of FL wasnt hit either.


I'VE BEEN DODGIN' HURR-ICANES!



frolicked on the beach last night with  rupee and she put up with my hootin' and hollarin' and knuckle thumpin'


-Mort-

this fuck fest is back up!

thought id pop on by to see if it was back up. its been like 2 months right?


well more blue monkey ass for all yall later. im busy chillin in New Orleans.



and i need more HAIR! - http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1403397/

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1403654/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1408581/

thanks to  taymonkey i have an awesome meme going on!


DO. IT. D:
NOW.



i need hair! pleeeeease! dont leave a poor blue monkey hairless!

here's the template: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1403397/

"COOL" people who have already dun it.
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1403654/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1408581/

bored outta ma mind.
think ill go skinny dip at the beach tonight.


D:

 woogle stole from her.




1) The way to win your heart?
Being able to dance better than me.

2) Do you twirl or scoop your spaghetti?
t-t-twirl

3) Are you dating the last person you kissed?
nope because im not dating

4) What did you do last night?
went to the beach to watch the storm roll in with some friends

5) Do you drink milk straight from the carton?
if its mine, YES. if its shared, no.

6) How long is your hair?
short

7) Do you like Batman?
FUCK YEAH BATMAN

8) What are you doing tonight?
DEPENDS.

9) Addicted to anything?
DEPENDS. just clementines

10) What were you last listening to?
Bird and Bee

11) Do you like anyone now?
DEPENDS.

12) When was the last time you sang out loud?
a couple of minutes ago.

13) What did you have for breakfast?
a brownie.

14) Is your birthday on a holiday?
its on the best fucking holiday of the year.

15) What instant messaging service do you use?
AIM and Yahoo

16) Can you cook?
YES. MANY MANY THINGS.

17) Did you have a nap today?
hahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahah iwish.

18) What was the reason you got in trouble last?
forgot my ID at a dance club. not sure if that counts as trouble though...

19) What do you wear more, jeans or sweats?
jeans.

20) When is your birthday?
October 31

21) Want some green beans?
DEPENDS.

22) Do you swear a lot?
DEPENDS on who im with.

23) Where did you get the shirt(s) you're wearing?
thrift stores, mall stores

24) Do you have any regrets?
only regret: never met a person with auxiliary nipples.

25) Do you ever snort when you laugh?
no

26) What's the first thing you notice of the preferred sex?
eyes and shoes

27) Do you want something you can't have?
all the time

28) Who would you like to see right now?
DEPENDS.

29) Are you a social or antisocial person?
social

30) Have the cops ever come by your house?
SHIT FOO. DEM PO PO ALWAYS AT MA HOUSE STARTIN SHIT, SHIT I HAD NUTTIN TO DO WITH, SHIT.
yes.

31) Do you have a tan?
yes

32) Ever been in love?
yes

33) Would you rather sleep with someone, or alone?
IF THIS MEANS SEX of course i dont want to do it alone!
but otherwise i find it hard to sleep with people next to me, i never sleep as deeply.

34) Ever had braces?
no

35) What do you wear to bed?
NOTHING. >:D

36) Who was the last person to disappoint you?
ugh... too many

37) Do you trust people?
rarely

38) What are you wearing?
hot pink panties with matching bra and a little mascara.

39) Looking forward to something this weekend?
YES. soccer on the beach then dancing at the club

40) What was the highlight of your week?
nipples.

41) What type of people do you fall for?
well there is a difference between who i think im falling for and finding out who i really fell for

42) Have you ever been IN a wedding?
TWICE.

doctor time!
9:45 appointment.







LAME JOURNAL! :D



Trading With
 TayMonkey (done) (waiting for their half)
 blitzdrachen AS A MONKEY

is it strange that i just woke up from a dream where i was the hunchback from the disney movie?
and i howled at random people like a dog?
then i was that gypsy girl following the bad guy (frolo?) around like a crazy fan girl?
and then i was the bad guy himself and screaming at tree for no reason until i jumped up into its bracnhes to avoid the hunters because i was suddenly a howling maniac animal again?

i mean seriously, what was in that fucking pie i ate before i went to bed?


its so embarrassing i just had to share it with the internet. :D

i havent seen that movie in YEARS. what was i? like 10 or something?





D:<



Trading With
 TayMonkey (done) (waiting for their half)
 blitzdrachen AS A MONKEY

maybe going to Busch Gardens.
grand ol' time, chum!


Trading With
 TayMonkey (done) (waiting for their half)
 blitzdrachen AS A MONKEY

i need some banana pudding. D:



Trading With
 TayMonkey (done) (waiting for their half)
 Kanvet (done) (waiting for their half)
 blitzdrachen AS A MONKEY
 sapphire AS A SODA DRINKING INDIAN MONKEY

oh how they beckon you!

a trade anyone?
I CAN TURN YOUR CHARACTER INTO A MONKEY! and...if they are already a monkey i can just....draw them







Trading With
 TayMonkey (done) (waiting for their half)
 Kanvet (done) (waiting for their half)
 blitzdrachen AS A MONKEY
 sapphire AS A SODA DRINKING INDIAN MONKEY

drive me crazy...in the good good GOOD way


Trading With
 TayMonkey -- my half done, waiting on his half
 Kanvet -- my half done, waiting on her half

is bananas.


Trading With
 TayMonkey -- my half done, waiting on his half
 Kanvet -- starting on my half, waiting on her half

GO SEE IT NOW!



Trading With
 TayMonkey -- my half done, waiting on his half
 tyne-the-hedgehog -- starting on my half, waiting on her half

art trades ftw

Trading With
 TayMonkey -- my half done, waiting on his half
 tyne-the-hedgehog -- starting on my half, waiting on her half



open for more as always!

-Mort-

when people just randomly watch you and then you go check out their page and you see that they are basically watching ALL OF FA. and all you see on their shout page is "thx 4 the watch!"


its almost an insult rather than a compliment.


i watch people because i really admire their art or some how we've really connected and we're friends. and i like to think most people have watched me because they found something in my drawing that they can enjoy that i was able to share with them.



BUT ANYWAY. i finally FINALLY have a new battery for my phone and DAMN did i have a lot of text messages and voice mails to go through. i don't think i even got half of them though because my inbox was too full. im going to hopefully get a new phone anyway this summer.


IN OTHER NEWS. working on the very first round of the mons-ters exchange on the livejournal community!

still open for trades and commissions.

-Mort-

single monkey on the run.

I really love drawing.
That's the bottom line.

Commissions: $15

You get:
1. A colored character on Bristol Board
2. A huge sticker with a colored character
3. Free shipping anywhere
(4. My saliva in a glass vile so that you can clone me for any use._

Examples:
Bristol Board Drawings
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1045568/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1045546/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1017351/
http://www.furaffinity.net/full/1002536/

Stickers
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1066894/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1067129/

Accepting paypal only please: blue_monkey_ways[at]yahoo.com


Note:
Please e-mail me with any questions. (or through note)
And if you are skeptical that I may not be able to draw a certain species, let me know and I will show you that yes I can. (I just really enjoy monkeys so forgive if my gallery is so full of them.)


-Mort-

rolling around restlessly brings much production.

THE BEST THING EVER.



probably not the best thing ever but its excited me.






HUGE.





ASS.




BLANK.




STICKERS.




For drawing and coloring on. These things are ridiculous

I just got off work and im bored.



1. Are you single or taken? single

2. Chocolate or flowers?
I'd give both to a girl but neither really appeal to me

3. Will you do anything special for Valentines Day?
Nope. it will just be like any other day

4.Do you like anyone?
im always in love with many people at one time but it doesn't mean i'd pursue them

5. Were you dating anyone last Valentines?
yes

6. What would be your dream Valentines date?
snowboarding then sex in the snow

7. Do you make a big deal about Valentines?
nope but i dont mind if my girl does

8. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
maybe?

9. Would you ever write someone a love letter?
if im already with someone id write them a nice letter and hide it in their pockets or around places they will find them (sappy stuff like that)

10. Do you believe in Cupid?
hahahhaaa no.

11. Do your parents give you presents on Valentines?
not usually but there was often more chocolate and candy around the house

12. Do you still send out Valentines cards?
i send my mom drawings

13. Do you like candy hearts?
no.

15. Is Valentines depressing?
eh, its just over rated and what not. not really.

16. How do you feel about PDA?
people can do it all they want, i just don't look if it looks disgusting to me. if i do it, i cant keep others from doing.

17. How is your love life?
non-active.

18. Have you ever been dumped on Valentines?
nope but i have friends who have dumped their girlfriends before valentine's day.... bad move. bad move...

19. How many roses would you want?
roses aren't my thing but i'll give them to girls

20. Will you have a boyfriend/girlfriend next Valentines?
who knows? im looking i guess...

-Mort-

CELL PHONE = DEAD



hahahaha! you know why this is such great news?!?!

1. only way work can get in touch with me
2. quickest way for any of my friends to get in touch with me
3. quickest way for my family to get in touch with me if there is an emergency (and it doesn't help that my little sister is currently in and out of the hospital as of late due to a weird bump on her chest)
4. don't have the money to buy a new phone
5. bought a new battery and it still doesn't work
6. ALL of my numbers are in there including my ex-girlfriend's (even though we rarely talk on the phone because of insane long distance charges so e-mail is the best way for her)

ugh
gonna take it the cell phone company to see what they can do but my warranty is over so i know they won't just up and give me a new one.


That means that i'm taking commissions for sure. i know i've already said it and i knew i wasn't going to get much of a response (one person is a maybe right now) but i figured thats how its going to be. before i wasn't in TOO much of a dire need but thats changed for the better! lame.

So here's how I'm going to do it, how I'm going to throw it out there:

- $25 for three full colored drawings
- anything you want of course
- i can draw trees for backgrounds but thats about it so backgrounds won't be included
- fun themes, horror themes and everything in between is welcome
- done in prisma markers and prisma pencils
- shipped to you if you want it, no extra cost
- if you want it shipped to you, it will be done on bristol
- i can do digital coloring so let me know if you prefer that (wider variety of color hues)

Q: Why not just offer one drawing for about $7 just in case people don't want three for $25?
A: I need to make it worth my while. If only one person commissions me, I will still get $25 and they will get three kick-ass colored drawings. If I offered up one drawing for less, and only one person commissioned me, that won't even buy me food for a day. Make sense? Maybe? ):

Feeling pretty desperate right now.
HELP.

-Mort-

HURR. RAH!


Note meeeeeeee.





-Mort-