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Emergency Commissions Open!?
Posted a year agoCasual reminder.
Posted 2 years agoFind me galaxyaussiedog and lonecrystalcat if you want to follow my work!
I try to post weekly, admittedly just had surgery so art will be scarce aside from sketches which are found for subs only.
I try to post weekly, admittedly just had surgery so art will be scarce aside from sketches which are found for subs only.
Pssst.
Posted 2 years agoFollow me at galaxyaussiedog / lonecrystalcat. I don’t add to this account anymore.
oc's for sale
Posted 3 years agohttps://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3018948
https://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3018946
https://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3018945
https://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3176896
selling a crap ton of hq oc's. no art offers please. will only accept dreamies in trade. do not offer on the super special, sona, or paired folders.
most are ranged around 10-15$ and upwards of 30$ if coming with extra art.
https://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3018946
https://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3018945
https://toyhou.se/star-mom/characte.....folder:3176896
selling a crap ton of hq oc's. no art offers please. will only accept dreamies in trade. do not offer on the super special, sona, or paired folders.
most are ranged around 10-15$ and upwards of 30$ if coming with extra art.
birthday - summer vacay
Posted 3 years agoit's my birthday this moonday. woo.
not important.
summer as started so i'm going to try and finish up owed work and things. going to do some personal art more and try to remember to share it here more often.
been doing species designs here and there for fun and the like not that i feel very confident in them.
thank certain folks of the community for that. :/
but in any case i'm here still, just ... exhausted from the last job.adopt account
Posted 3 years agonew adopt account?
yup.
https://toyhou.se/15336115.-35-usd
collab between me and flower--kitties and there are well into 17+ more coming ranging from all sorts of themes.
i'm still working on more and add ons for bases and such that i'll be doing because losing 300$ a month (and soon over 1k$ starting the end of may) i'm going to need some kind of income in the mean time.
so you all should follow and buy like today. the sooner we sell, the sooner the others will be posted and done.
yup.
https://toyhou.se/15336115.-35-usd
collab between me and flower--kitties and there are well into 17+ more coming ranging from all sorts of themes.
i'm still working on more and add ons for bases and such that i'll be doing because losing 300$ a month (and soon over 1k$ starting the end of may) i'm going to need some kind of income in the mean time.
so you all should follow and buy like today. the sooner we sell, the sooner the others will be posted and done.
question
Posted 3 years agoi'm doing traditional stuff at school and the likes again so like.
i have a buzzly and twitter but i didn't know if anyone wanted to see the art here, too.
it's such a pain to upload here compared to everyone else, and i dunno if people even still care if i post here.
the interactivity had been down since long before i stopped posting so it made me less inclined to bother dealing with the uploading half of this site due to just exhaustion and impatience. i'm spoiled elsewhere and postybirb is a hassle to deal with templates anymore.
so if i get enough interest i guess i can start posting here again for personal stuff. otherwise find me elsewhere.
i have a buzzly and twitter but i didn't know if anyone wanted to see the art here, too.
it's such a pain to upload here compared to everyone else, and i dunno if people even still care if i post here.
the interactivity had been down since long before i stopped posting so it made me less inclined to bother dealing with the uploading half of this site due to just exhaustion and impatience. i'm spoiled elsewhere and postybirb is a hassle to deal with templates anymore.
so if i get enough interest i guess i can start posting here again for personal stuff. otherwise find me elsewhere.
i caught 'rona
Posted 3 years agosoooo.
2 weeks off of school.
snowdays killed what bit of school i had week before.
i got to work one week.
and then i caught 'omnicron.
i hate this.
so if you guys want to help uh - i'm down almost a month's pay so...
https://toyhou.se/pancaked selling a crap ton of characters here
Or you could check my ko-fi or paypal.me below.
i'm in hell. i know i am.
2 weeks off of school.
snowdays killed what bit of school i had week before.
i got to work one week.
and then i caught 'omnicron.
i hate this.
so if you guys want to help uh - i'm down almost a month's pay so...
https://toyhou.se/pancaked selling a crap ton of characters here
Or you could check my ko-fi or paypal.me below.
i'm in hell. i know i am.
life, work, commission update : refund roll out
Posted 4 years agotldr; i've been given bad medial news, my head is broke, and if you want a refund just contact me the same way you ordered (discord, notes, twitter) and if you are not on my to do list 12-20 to 01-04, i will add you to my weekly friday refund list starting january (I have 2 weeks of no work for the month of december, so i can't really offer that this month) for when i get paid.
i have been inactive in literally every server on discord i have joined, every art site, and pretty much everything aside from twitter because i have been completely and utterly burnt out. twitter is easy to scream into the void with short, sweet updates and then get back to work dealing with screaming mentally regressed preteens.
my mental health has been at rock bottom since the beginning of the year with only random bursts of mania where i have been well enough to work on anything. i have been near hospitalized several time due to it, and because of it i have not had energy to deal with both children all day long as well as handling doing more work (making it almost a 15+ hour workday) once i get home. there are times where i just fall asleep to avoid dealing with my (as I have been alerted by many people now) rather toxic environment at home.
between my adhd and high functioning autism (which is getting severely worse due to at home instances exacerbating it), i am lucky i can focus. i'm dissociating hours at a time, and at times even behind the wheel while driving which is, obviously, dangerous. it's been a very long run of me trying to get proper help, therapy, and medication where there is none in the area that i live in. the medication i was put on was for depression and not only made said depression worse, it made me violently ill at times to the point i had to speak with administrators to the establishment i was getting said ""help"" from.
my stress from everything has accelerated to the point i am losing my mind at times over the smallest things. the domino effect that falls on me goes from 0 to 100 in a matter of dropping my fork or someone cutting me off on the road. i'm crying almost all the time over the dumbest things. my boyfriend has been the only thing keeping me sane at this point.
i've also had to do repairs to my truck (just yesterday my battery went out completely, a bad battery even and had to be replaced), as well as paying for bills, groceries, and for gas while doing my best to not take any new commissions and only via selling characters and the pay through substitute teaching.
i have also been alerted that come next week i am at a 99.9% chance of being put on insulin. i have no insurance so this is absolutely devastating. as most are aware, pens alone are upwards of 100$+ and vials require refrigeration at all times which, as a substitute teacher, i have nowhere to really put it without being questioned or worse. even then, the worse news is that i have no idea whether it's a pump or pens. it all depends on my A1C results that i also just paid for. it has all been weighing down on me due to the fact i had been ignored with my concerns for years about the fact my blood-sugar would shoot to 500+ for no reason even if all i did was drink water and eat carb and sugar free food (as in food that had no sugars, not sugar substitutes) and my nerve damage was growing worse and worse due to it.
i don't have any excuses for why i haven't completed super old work aside from burnout, pain, and mental exhaustion. i'd get bouts of inspiration of 'oh i like doing this, let's sell as many as i can while i can still do it' and then getting overwhelmed because the hyper focus would leave me within three+ days.
this is why after i finish or refund whatever i owe now, i will no longer be offering commissions. period. it was a very nice run for the last 20+ years, but i have to sit down and evaluate myself as a horrible boss for myself. i have to have someone on me at all times to make sure i work and frankly my family couldn't give a single fuck about me, much less enough to keep on me to make sure i finished work.
if you wish for a refund, contact me with your paypal via the note you sent. if you contacted me on discord, please message me there. through twitter, message me there too, i have already made this message there myself and why i was reminded today to post here too.
every friday i am paid. december i have 2 weeks of no pay so i can't start this month, but i definitely can come january. this means every week i receive at most about 300$ish dollars. because of this, so long as there are no large holidays that there is no school or school breaks, i will be able to allocate 100-120$ for refunds.
depending on the amount that was ordered, i will be rolling out as many refunds from those set aside amounts at the end of each week to those that i just can not finish or to folks who have contacted me to refund them.
i am deeply sorry for how unprofessional i have been, and worse still that i let my life take over my business to the point it came to this, but at the same time i am glad that i am now working a job where i can simply rely on that as opposed to constantly trying to do something i just can't bring myself to do anymore.
i hate my art now, i hate everything about it and how i have acted and / or been treated in the community. my customers, bless all of you, have been amazing and beautiful and wonderful. there are others that have not and have contributed to my deteriorating health both mentally and physically, and it is no longer safe for me to rely on such things any longer.
if i do open commissions in the very very late future (probably during the summer) it will be 2 orders at a time. with lots of breaks. because i need to draw for me again, i need to learn to love my art and everything once again. i'm exhausted from the massive guilt (very much earned honestly) and self-depreciation that came with it that made it hard for me to do or love anything.
i have already given a few refunds, and i will continue to do so.
PLEASE CONTACT ME VIA THE WAY YOU ORDERED FOR ME TO ADD YOU TO MY LIST WITH THE AMOUNT ORDERED IF YOU WANT A REFUND.
If you are on my to-do list for my vacation break, I will let you know. this is mostly icons or traditional sketchpage orders and, if i am capable, a few waist up orders.
The Full Facts and Details
i have been inactive in literally every server on discord i have joined, every art site, and pretty much everything aside from twitter because i have been completely and utterly burnt out. twitter is easy to scream into the void with short, sweet updates and then get back to work dealing with screaming mentally regressed preteens.
my mental health has been at rock bottom since the beginning of the year with only random bursts of mania where i have been well enough to work on anything. i have been near hospitalized several time due to it, and because of it i have not had energy to deal with both children all day long as well as handling doing more work (making it almost a 15+ hour workday) once i get home. there are times where i just fall asleep to avoid dealing with my (as I have been alerted by many people now) rather toxic environment at home.
between my adhd and high functioning autism (which is getting severely worse due to at home instances exacerbating it), i am lucky i can focus. i'm dissociating hours at a time, and at times even behind the wheel while driving which is, obviously, dangerous. it's been a very long run of me trying to get proper help, therapy, and medication where there is none in the area that i live in. the medication i was put on was for depression and not only made said depression worse, it made me violently ill at times to the point i had to speak with administrators to the establishment i was getting said ""help"" from.
my stress from everything has accelerated to the point i am losing my mind at times over the smallest things. the domino effect that falls on me goes from 0 to 100 in a matter of dropping my fork or someone cutting me off on the road. i'm crying almost all the time over the dumbest things. my boyfriend has been the only thing keeping me sane at this point.
i've also had to do repairs to my truck (just yesterday my battery went out completely, a bad battery even and had to be replaced), as well as paying for bills, groceries, and for gas while doing my best to not take any new commissions and only via selling characters and the pay through substitute teaching.
i have also been alerted that come next week i am at a 99.9% chance of being put on insulin. i have no insurance so this is absolutely devastating. as most are aware, pens alone are upwards of 100$+ and vials require refrigeration at all times which, as a substitute teacher, i have nowhere to really put it without being questioned or worse. even then, the worse news is that i have no idea whether it's a pump or pens. it all depends on my A1C results that i also just paid for. it has all been weighing down on me due to the fact i had been ignored with my concerns for years about the fact my blood-sugar would shoot to 500+ for no reason even if all i did was drink water and eat carb and sugar free food (as in food that had no sugars, not sugar substitutes) and my nerve damage was growing worse and worse due to it.
i don't have any excuses for why i haven't completed super old work aside from burnout, pain, and mental exhaustion. i'd get bouts of inspiration of 'oh i like doing this, let's sell as many as i can while i can still do it' and then getting overwhelmed because the hyper focus would leave me within three+ days.
this is why after i finish or refund whatever i owe now, i will no longer be offering commissions. period. it was a very nice run for the last 20+ years, but i have to sit down and evaluate myself as a horrible boss for myself. i have to have someone on me at all times to make sure i work and frankly my family couldn't give a single fuck about me, much less enough to keep on me to make sure i finished work.
here is how it is going to work for refunds for those of you who have been waiting an embarrassingly on me amount of time: if you wish for a refund, contact me with your paypal via the note you sent. if you contacted me on discord, please message me there. through twitter, message me there too, i have already made this message there myself and why i was reminded today to post here too.
every friday i am paid. december i have 2 weeks of no pay so i can't start this month, but i definitely can come january. this means every week i receive at most about 300$ish dollars. because of this, so long as there are no large holidays that there is no school or school breaks, i will be able to allocate 100-120$ for refunds.
depending on the amount that was ordered, i will be rolling out as many refunds from those set aside amounts at the end of each week to those that i just can not finish or to folks who have contacted me to refund them.
i am deeply sorry for how unprofessional i have been, and worse still that i let my life take over my business to the point it came to this, but at the same time i am glad that i am now working a job where i can simply rely on that as opposed to constantly trying to do something i just can't bring myself to do anymore.
i hate my art now, i hate everything about it and how i have acted and / or been treated in the community. my customers, bless all of you, have been amazing and beautiful and wonderful. there are others that have not and have contributed to my deteriorating health both mentally and physically, and it is no longer safe for me to rely on such things any longer.
if i do open commissions in the very very late future (probably during the summer) it will be 2 orders at a time. with lots of breaks. because i need to draw for me again, i need to learn to love my art and everything once again. i'm exhausted from the massive guilt (very much earned honestly) and self-depreciation that came with it that made it hard for me to do or love anything.
i have already given a few refunds, and i will continue to do so.
PLEASE CONTACT ME VIA THE WAY YOU ORDERED FOR ME TO ADD YOU TO MY LIST WITH THE AMOUNT ORDERED IF YOU WANT A REFUND.
If you are on my to-do list for my vacation break, I will let you know. this is mostly icons or traditional sketchpage orders and, if i am capable, a few waist up orders.
new job
Posted 4 years agoso i got the job as a substitute teacher for my county. i'll be working across several schools and i've already been booked for several days.
depending on the pay that i get will determine if i can refund art that my executive dysfunction just has been refusing to let me do.
i appreciate everyone's patience while i struggled so hard with so many things over the last year. between equipment breaks to mental and physical health of myself and my family, i have had no time to do much of anything this month alone and it's been a nightmare and made me come to realize that i need to do for myself and practice love for myself and art again.
i never gave myself that break or that time because i never knew how until this last year but my environment never let me actually sit and feel my feelings and i'm going to now. i appreciate so much everyone being so kind and patient with me, especially what few close friends I have.
i'm going to be far more stable about boundaries and who i interact with from now on, too. i've been pushed around and yelled at and treated like crap by certain groups of people for far too long and i have been working toward removing a lot of toxicity and anger and just really downer people from my life. i spent way too much time trying to lift everyone else up instead of letting myself do so. when i'm too scared to speak to others due to it turning into some stupid competition or being talked over or just being afraid to speak due to my own literal PTSD responses, I realized that honestly? the environments i kept putting myself in with some desperation to make friends or have socialization was not condusive to my life.
i can't pretend i am what i'm not. and that was pretending to be okay. to be everyone's mother. to be surrounded by people who just were not healthy for me. it wasn't necessarily a lot of groups are always toxic, it's just a matter that i'm too old and under medicated and under treated to be able to function around with most of them because of undiagnosed (but somewhat officially) confirmed disorders and medical conditions. i'm tired of being everyone's rock and any time i needed one i had to keep it to myself because someone else was having something up. it's been going on for years and frankly i'm tired my doodles, i'm very tired.
i've got to focus on me instead of always trying to help others as weird as it sounds, which had hindered my ability to do much of anything for anyone especially work.
to those of you still here, i love all of you and hopefully i will have something for you soon.
for those who are just here for the tiddy?
i mean all thanks to you, too, just don't expect much for a chunk of time while i work a near full time job if i can manage to secure the hours.
depending on the pay that i get will determine if i can refund art that my executive dysfunction just has been refusing to let me do.
i appreciate everyone's patience while i struggled so hard with so many things over the last year. between equipment breaks to mental and physical health of myself and my family, i have had no time to do much of anything this month alone and it's been a nightmare and made me come to realize that i need to do for myself and practice love for myself and art again.
i never gave myself that break or that time because i never knew how until this last year but my environment never let me actually sit and feel my feelings and i'm going to now. i appreciate so much everyone being so kind and patient with me, especially what few close friends I have.
i'm going to be far more stable about boundaries and who i interact with from now on, too. i've been pushed around and yelled at and treated like crap by certain groups of people for far too long and i have been working toward removing a lot of toxicity and anger and just really downer people from my life. i spent way too much time trying to lift everyone else up instead of letting myself do so. when i'm too scared to speak to others due to it turning into some stupid competition or being talked over or just being afraid to speak due to my own literal PTSD responses, I realized that honestly? the environments i kept putting myself in with some desperation to make friends or have socialization was not condusive to my life.
i can't pretend i am what i'm not. and that was pretending to be okay. to be everyone's mother. to be surrounded by people who just were not healthy for me. it wasn't necessarily a lot of groups are always toxic, it's just a matter that i'm too old and under medicated and under treated to be able to function around with most of them because of undiagnosed (but somewhat officially) confirmed disorders and medical conditions. i'm tired of being everyone's rock and any time i needed one i had to keep it to myself because someone else was having something up. it's been going on for years and frankly i'm tired my doodles, i'm very tired.
i've got to focus on me instead of always trying to help others as weird as it sounds, which had hindered my ability to do much of anything for anyone especially work.
to those of you still here, i love all of you and hopefully i will have something for you soon.
for those who are just here for the tiddy?
i mean all thanks to you, too, just don't expect much for a chunk of time while i work a near full time job if i can manage to secure the hours.
icons bundle sales!!!!
Posted 4 years agoYUP
I WANNA VISIT MY BOYFRIEND FOR CHRISTMAS.
AND STAY AT LEAST 2 WEEKS THIS TIME.
So i'm opening up 8 30$ icon slots. If you buy 3, you get a 4th free, if you buy 8 I will do 12 icons for you and I will get them all done within 3-4 days.
i'm serious guys i need this trip more than anything because frankly after my aunt died and other irl things i need to get out of here for some time and some relief from the stress that i live under. i'd be taking my brand new laptop too so i have my DRAWING TABLET to work even while I was gone like
i don't wanna beg but if i need anything it's about 300$ ish with taxes I think? I can cover THAT much on my own but just.
if anyone could spare something or just wants icons i am open
UPDATE: I just got a reserve for 5 icons for the 14th.
That means if you guys wanna order at least 3 more icons from me, you'd get the fourth free.
Or if you just want one that's fine too, just spread the word!
UPDATE UPDATE: All ICON SLOTS ARE TAKEN YOU GUYS ARE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING.
you're giving me the best christmas gift ever and i'm losing my mind you guys like my icons so much. my opinion of my art and myself is always down the toilet but then you guys turn around and give me this kind of miracle and i'm just - WEH.
thank you all. so much. i mean it.
I WANNA VISIT MY BOYFRIEND FOR CHRISTMAS.
AND STAY AT LEAST 2 WEEKS THIS TIME.
So i'm opening up 8 30$ icon slots. If you buy 3, you get a 4th free, if you buy 8 I will do 12 icons for you and I will get them all done within 3-4 days.
i'm serious guys i need this trip more than anything because frankly after my aunt died and other irl things i need to get out of here for some time and some relief from the stress that i live under. i'd be taking my brand new laptop too so i have my DRAWING TABLET to work even while I was gone like
i don't wanna beg but if i need anything it's about 300$ ish with taxes I think? I can cover THAT much on my own but just.
if anyone could spare something or just wants icons i am open
UPDATE: I just got a reserve for 5 icons for the 14th.
That means if you guys wanna order at least 3 more icons from me, you'd get the fourth free.
Or if you just want one that's fine too, just spread the word!
UPDATE UPDATE: All ICON SLOTS ARE TAKEN YOU GUYS ARE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING.
you're giving me the best christmas gift ever and i'm losing my mind you guys like my icons so much. my opinion of my art and myself is always down the toilet but then you guys turn around and give me this kind of miracle and i'm just - WEH.
thank you all. so much. i mean it.
design trades...?
Posted 4 years agono it won't be a custom from me, i'd be trading from the gigantic collection that i've just updated over at my sale's toyhouse that would be what i traded.
i don't mind if they're on a base, so long as it's not one i already own. i own all of the more popular bases right now so unless you're super awesome with base editing i guess i won't be super interested? i'm just in a bad place right now
my aunt died yesterday. Technically two days ago. and i haven't been handling it well since there will be no funeral service or anything thanks to covid, she's being cremated, and she may be spread ashes wise before i ever even get a chance to say goodbye. she was my only advocate against all the physical and emotional abuse i endured back when i was younger. she saved me from being 100% complacent and ending the at least physical side of the abuse i always endured.
she was my grandmother's best friend, and she is not taking it well at all. my grandfather is being a jackass and watching all this crap about death and murder even though he knows that my aunt just fucking died. he's been absolutely miserable and awful about it and trying to troll us both as much as he can because he hates when it's not the 'Francisco Show' and pushes buttons to the point of panic attacks for me.
so i'm trying to not do retail therapy as i'm still struggling with cash but i'm trying to at least get these adopts where they need to go, too.
if you would like to do a custom design and like a design i have up for trade please let me know.
if you'd like to buy any of the adopts i have for sale, please let me know and i can tell you if i'm allowed to trade them or not.
thank you guys so much for putting up with my emotionally devastated ass, i know i'm not the best but i'm trying my best.
i don't mind if they're on a base, so long as it's not one i already own. i own all of the more popular bases right now so unless you're super awesome with base editing i guess i won't be super interested? i'm just in a bad place right now
my aunt died yesterday. Technically two days ago. and i haven't been handling it well since there will be no funeral service or anything thanks to covid, she's being cremated, and she may be spread ashes wise before i ever even get a chance to say goodbye. she was my only advocate against all the physical and emotional abuse i endured back when i was younger. she saved me from being 100% complacent and ending the at least physical side of the abuse i always endured.
she was my grandmother's best friend, and she is not taking it well at all. my grandfather is being a jackass and watching all this crap about death and murder even though he knows that my aunt just fucking died. he's been absolutely miserable and awful about it and trying to troll us both as much as he can because he hates when it's not the 'Francisco Show' and pushes buttons to the point of panic attacks for me.
so i'm trying to not do retail therapy as i'm still struggling with cash but i'm trying to at least get these adopts where they need to go, too.
if you would like to do a custom design and like a design i have up for trade please let me know.
if you'd like to buy any of the adopts i have for sale, please let me know and i can tell you if i'm allowed to trade them or not.
thank you guys so much for putting up with my emotionally devastated ass, i know i'm not the best but i'm trying my best.
super commission special! -- CLAIMED
Posted 4 years agohttps://store.steampowered.com/sub/622631/
offering 2 refined sketch art pieces (60$ value) for anyone who gifts me this. I need it by the 15th before the sale ends.
samples - Newest > oldest
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43473977/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43465522/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43456249/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323606/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323543/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323484/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323441/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43186784/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43186751/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42863998/
Yeah it's just 10$ off but that's still 10$. This game is very important to me as it's been a comfort food style game for me to play the last long while. If you'd like to know my steam, please message me and we can arrange everything. To be complete within 2 weeks at the most for art.
CLAIMED THANKS FOR READING!
offering 2 refined sketch art pieces (60$ value) for anyone who gifts me this. I need it by the 15th before the sale ends.
samples - Newest > oldest
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43473977/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43465522/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43456249/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323606/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323543/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323484/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43323441/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43186784/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43186751/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42863998/
Yeah it's just 10$ off but that's still 10$. This game is very important to me as it's been a comfort food style game for me to play the last long while. If you'd like to know my steam, please message me and we can arrange everything. To be complete within 2 weeks at the most for art.
CLAIMED THANKS FOR READING!
gigantic character purge
Posted 4 years agohttps://toyhou.se/Pancaked/characte.....folder:2253753
why yes i have a fuckton of adoptables for sale, resale, and trade.
money > art (i am picky) > characters (I will trade multiples to get a dream child i want)
currently jobless, commissions are kinda hard since my equipment keeps failing or i have to buy things to replace and/or protect said equipment, and i'm very very tired. i need funds to pay for my monthly bills so i don't end up in the negatives. selling a ton of characters, or even trading a good chunk as well. thank
why yes i have a fuckton of adoptables for sale, resale, and trade.
money > art (i am picky) > characters (I will trade multiples to get a dream child i want)
currently jobless, commissions are kinda hard since my equipment keeps failing or i have to buy things to replace and/or protect said equipment, and i'm very very tired. i need funds to pay for my monthly bills so i don't end up in the negatives. selling a ton of characters, or even trading a good chunk as well. thank
lost my job
Posted 4 years agothe salon i was working at has been running customers off, and they're really kinda shit people because they hired my replacement who literally was just a vietnamese version of me at a much higher price so they let me go.
i don't have any way of making money right now so i'm kind of in a minor... everything really. at least one of my debts has been paid off, but i do have still 300$ worth of bills monthly thanks to medicine, school, etc.
i know i keep begging but i'm trying not to take on more commissions than i already have due to owing so much as it is, but if you guys want i do have designs up for sale.
https://toyhou.se/pancaked/characters
the art tradable ones i am super picky on for art and less likely to accept cash for since folks like to pretend i'm still going by deviantart rules. i haven't had a chance to update pricing on these and that's why they're there for art.
but i am kinda in a place where i desperately need money and help.
you're also more than welcomed to toss money my way to the links listed above the journal - any bit helps and any donations over 20$ will get a doodle between my commission works.
i don't have any way of making money right now so i'm kind of in a minor... everything really. at least one of my debts has been paid off, but i do have still 300$ worth of bills monthly thanks to medicine, school, etc.
i know i keep begging but i'm trying not to take on more commissions than i already have due to owing so much as it is, but if you guys want i do have designs up for sale.
https://toyhou.se/pancaked/characters
the art tradable ones i am super picky on for art and less likely to accept cash for since folks like to pretend i'm still going by deviantart rules. i haven't had a chance to update pricing on these and that's why they're there for art.
but i am kinda in a place where i desperately need money and help.
you're also more than welcomed to toss money my way to the links listed above the journal - any bit helps and any donations over 20$ will get a doodle between my commission works.
adopts for sale
Posted 4 years agohttps://toyhou.se/12255432.rottie made a rottie but can't connect. 30$
https://toyhou.se/12258773.piebald-pom#38342395 also selling a piebald pom i made, can't connect to her either. 20$ but if either are bought out for 50$+ I'll add another base doodle of them on their respective bases.
https://toyhou.se/Pancaked/characters
even more for sale here. i don't have access to my other laptop at the moment or i'd post everything up but for now here you go.
i'm dead tired, and i'm going to have to get another job soon. any help would be greatly appreciated as i'll be in between jobs i don't know how long honestly. i'm going to try substitute teaching for now but i have no idea if i even have the right clothes for being a teacher since i own one dress and it's a rockabilly dress.
i don't know what i'm going to do and i'm panicked and just... i don't want to be a burden on anyone and i feel that's all i'm ever going to be.
https://toyhou.se/12258773.piebald-pom#38342395 also selling a piebald pom i made, can't connect to her either. 20$ but if either are bought out for 50$+ I'll add another base doodle of them on their respective bases.
https://toyhou.se/Pancaked/characters
even more for sale here. i don't have access to my other laptop at the moment or i'd post everything up but for now here you go.
i'm dead tired, and i'm going to have to get another job soon. any help would be greatly appreciated as i'll be in between jobs i don't know how long honestly. i'm going to try substitute teaching for now but i have no idea if i even have the right clothes for being a teacher since i own one dress and it's a rockabilly dress.
i don't know what i'm going to do and i'm panicked and just... i don't want to be a burden on anyone and i feel that's all i'm ever going to be.
huge art posting
Posted 4 years agoi forgot to post these here. i only ever really post to twitter live at this point but uh.
sorry there's a lot of basework pieces that i'm throwing up.artfight, sales, life update
Posted 4 years agojust letting you guys know i'm still on artfight if you haven't guessed. you can find me here.
https://artfight.net/~Peche
you guys should totally doodle me and i'll doodle back. yup yup.
also i'm still selling a ton of characters over here
https://toyhou.se/Pancaked/characters
there's a directory and everything. i'm looking at art, hard cash sales, and maybe adopts where i trade multiple for high quality character trades so you get several, and i just get one. i'm still working at the salon, only about 3 weeks or so left to finish my hours and decide what i want to do after the fact, it's been hard. the salon was flooded yesterday (not to the point of ankle deep water but one of the spa baths had been left on and there was water all over the main floor) and we had to clean that up. i got a taste of sunday life trying to get a bunch of pedicures done. apparently folks recommend me so i got to see my first request customer yesterday. ♥
i'm slowly working on commissions as my body lets me. i do personal itty bitty things or base work at times to warm up but then end up overdoing it sometimes. this week will be art fight focused and some linework focusing on commissions, tomorrow i will work on some sketchbook pages. i worked 5 days in a row this week on the salon floor so i'm very tired, more so than usual. bear with me.
anyway.
Posted 4 years agohi. i'm tired. i made 28$ today and i'm kinda happy.
anyone have any advice on how to handle hive skin though? i got hives earlier as stated and now they're starting to like, dry out and form little skin pockets around where they were and it looks really bad.
i wear gloves most of the time at work but they're cheap latex and break pretty easily so my hands end up getting wet pretty often.
anyone have any advice on how to handle hive skin though? i got hives earlier as stated and now they're starting to like, dry out and form little skin pockets around where they were and it looks really bad.
i wear gloves most of the time at work but they're cheap latex and break pretty easily so my hands end up getting wet pretty often.
regarding an adopt incident.
Posted 4 years agoit was brought to my attention today about an adopt made by another user that was similar (in theme) to my nyota and i'd like to clear up that everything has been taken care of and discussed and quietly and very happily resolved.
i took it upon myself to handle the situation to prevent anyone else from doing so in defense or pitchfork level mentality for the artist who created the design for me of my true unicorn sona type thing and keep everything nice and peaceful, which it was.
a journal was made about it clearing everything up on their end, so i'm doing the same to keep folks from coming at me like 'HOW DARE YOU THEY LOOK NOTHING ALIKE' or whatever might have you. i'm a very tired, older woman with a ton of characters and understand coincidences happen all the time and i'm more than willing to work things out with folks to see what's going on.
i have no ill will toward the adopt artist, in fact i've followed them for quite some time and they me for a good while as well. there's nothing ill will between us, everything's good.
so please don't come at me with the usual death threats, fist shaking, bad mouthing, gossiping crap that usually follows this stuff because it happened to be my character and i was playing peacekeeper to make sure no one got hurt. i've handled the situation as much as i can and i can not control what other people think or feel, but i can ask that i be respected as well.
i'm going to rest now, today has been a mess and i just want to sleep and pretend none of this happened.
it's exhausting having to be the 'mom friend who fixes everything' all the time, and part of why i stopped being friends with a LOT of people. i will not keep doing this unless it directly involves me (like today) to make sure everyone is appeased and content as peacefully as possible.
there was mild concern on my part, but my laptop screen is fairly dark and i am partially blind so it was the only reason why i even talked to the artist about it, otherwise i have avipd meaning even telling burger king they fucked up my order is NEVER happening. i only did it to keep the peace between the communities because adoptable folks get really really protective and possessive and malicious when they want to. i've seen this first hand in the last year especially with several younger artists that abused their age as to why they thought it was okay and i'm tired.
i have no ill will toward the artist, i have no further problems (not that i had too much of one originally, mild concern and a little discomfort at best because i was convinced i had been put in a situation again that was going to make me have another panic attack) with the adoptable in question and i'm hoping everyone will just calm down and go about their lives.
it's pixels and furry characters. remember that. this is a sona of mine, in fact my current obsession, but even i know that there are going to be similar characters to her out there. hell i have some similar characters to her already so yeah.
please keep it peaceful, and please be adults about this. i'm not interested in hearing gossip or being badmouthed just for owning a design and trying to stop drama from coming.
thank you.
i took it upon myself to handle the situation to prevent anyone else from doing so in defense or pitchfork level mentality for the artist who created the design for me of my true unicorn sona type thing and keep everything nice and peaceful, which it was.
a journal was made about it clearing everything up on their end, so i'm doing the same to keep folks from coming at me like 'HOW DARE YOU THEY LOOK NOTHING ALIKE' or whatever might have you. i'm a very tired, older woman with a ton of characters and understand coincidences happen all the time and i'm more than willing to work things out with folks to see what's going on.
i have no ill will toward the adopt artist, in fact i've followed them for quite some time and they me for a good while as well. there's nothing ill will between us, everything's good.
so please don't come at me with the usual death threats, fist shaking, bad mouthing, gossiping crap that usually follows this stuff because it happened to be my character and i was playing peacekeeper to make sure no one got hurt. i've handled the situation as much as i can and i can not control what other people think or feel, but i can ask that i be respected as well.
i'm going to rest now, today has been a mess and i just want to sleep and pretend none of this happened.
it's exhausting having to be the 'mom friend who fixes everything' all the time, and part of why i stopped being friends with a LOT of people. i will not keep doing this unless it directly involves me (like today) to make sure everyone is appeased and content as peacefully as possible.
there was mild concern on my part, but my laptop screen is fairly dark and i am partially blind so it was the only reason why i even talked to the artist about it, otherwise i have avipd meaning even telling burger king they fucked up my order is NEVER happening. i only did it to keep the peace between the communities because adoptable folks get really really protective and possessive and malicious when they want to. i've seen this first hand in the last year especially with several younger artists that abused their age as to why they thought it was okay and i'm tired.
i have no ill will toward the artist, i have no further problems (not that i had too much of one originally, mild concern and a little discomfort at best because i was convinced i had been put in a situation again that was going to make me have another panic attack) with the adoptable in question and i'm hoping everyone will just calm down and go about their lives.
it's pixels and furry characters. remember that. this is a sona of mine, in fact my current obsession, but even i know that there are going to be similar characters to her out there. hell i have some similar characters to her already so yeah.
please keep it peaceful, and please be adults about this. i'm not interested in hearing gossip or being badmouthed just for owning a design and trying to stop drama from coming.
thank you.
update -- well.
Posted 4 years agoi took sunday and monday for myself to draw things for me or the boyfriend because today i have had the absolute worst luck with food and pain and just all around nastities. and not the fun kind.
basically if anyone keeps up with my twitter i've had it rough the last few weeks with this internship, some medical scares, and my finances now being in the double digits. i have no money really to do much of anything, and nearly no time to do much of anything. when i upload to here, it's usually in large batches because i take nine years to finish something if anything anymore.
i'm kind of in a position where i need help and i want to just reach out to someone but i don't know who i could reach out to or if i should keep trying.
commissions are something i want to retire.
but it's the only way to make money.
but i'm so bad at keeping up with them due to depression and anxiety and the severe pain in my hands from dealing with my internship.
i work 13+ hour days at a salon driving to and back as well. it's unpaid, and people barely tip more than a dollar if that per session (thirty minutes i might add) so it's not like i'm making money. i'm paying for my gas which is about 30-40$ a week (right now it's really high because of the holiday pricing), i'm paying for food (i can buy groceries easy but i can't pay for hot food) and i only get like 4 minutes for lunch anyway with no breaks, i'm paying my 300$ in bills by myself and like.
i'm finally tapped out.
maybe i should sell things? but selling adoptables doesn't really work for me, it takes weeks for people to buy one and even then they don't sell for much and people keep telling me they don't want to pay more than 2$ an hour for work anymore from me. i'm kind of just floundering.
it's why i had to update my damn signatures everywhere.
if i want to move out by january and finally live with the man of my dreams, i don't know what i'm going to do.
basically if anyone keeps up with my twitter i've had it rough the last few weeks with this internship, some medical scares, and my finances now being in the double digits. i have no money really to do much of anything, and nearly no time to do much of anything. when i upload to here, it's usually in large batches because i take nine years to finish something if anything anymore.
i'm kind of in a position where i need help and i want to just reach out to someone but i don't know who i could reach out to or if i should keep trying.
commissions are something i want to retire.
but it's the only way to make money.
but i'm so bad at keeping up with them due to depression and anxiety and the severe pain in my hands from dealing with my internship.
i work 13+ hour days at a salon driving to and back as well. it's unpaid, and people barely tip more than a dollar if that per session (thirty minutes i might add) so it's not like i'm making money. i'm paying for my gas which is about 30-40$ a week (right now it's really high because of the holiday pricing), i'm paying for food (i can buy groceries easy but i can't pay for hot food) and i only get like 4 minutes for lunch anyway with no breaks, i'm paying my 300$ in bills by myself and like.
i'm finally tapped out.
maybe i should sell things? but selling adoptables doesn't really work for me, it takes weeks for people to buy one and even then they don't sell for much and people keep telling me they don't want to pay more than 2$ an hour for work anymore from me. i'm kind of just floundering.
it's why i had to update my damn signatures everywhere.
if i want to move out by january and finally live with the man of my dreams, i don't know what i'm going to do.
tw: it got worse
Posted 4 years agomy mental health doctor gaslit the shit out of me because i reported malpractice to my therapist who happened to be her boss and now i'm stuck in this ... fucking limbo where i might have to cancel everything ever and just never speak to anyone again. they want to put me on antipsychotics because they won't believe that i have had adhd since the 90's. seriously. they think adhd is so NOT IT that they're putting me on antipsychotics instead of scheduling an evaluation for proof they're fucking wrong because they know the system is fucking flawed.
i swear to god i'm going to use my fucking food money i have now to get the eval, then i'm suing their asses for purposeful malpractice and malicious intent. i'm fucking ready to stop being a doormat and start being a god damn PROBLEM
because it's getting exhausting to be told that adhd isn't a disorder and some fucking karen level whatever the fuck dpn means (the others refer to her as fucking rn not a real doctor) apparently knows my body better than me after seeing me 15 minutes at best 4 times a year but hahahaha what do i fucking know i only know meds made me sick, said they did, was told to talk to my doctor about it because i was on it for years and knowing full well that holy fucking shit that was inappropriate and i talked to them and the doctor said STOP TAKING THEM and she's panicking and i'm
i'm tired.
everytime i try to do things for myself to get better i'm slapped in the face with 'fuck you fat bitch no one cares give me your money' and that's it.
school.
mental health.
home life.
literally i'm so fucking stretched thin that mr fantastic would be jealous. elastigirl is taking notes.
im dying.
i can't pretend i'm not anymore. i can't play it off as a joke anymore.
i'm serious. this isn't just being dramatic. i am literally dying and i can get NO FUCKING HELP with it.
i'm ready to just give up. i mean, what's the point anyway.
the world's gone to shit, i'm destined to be in a job i hate forever because i can't handle the mental strain of being self-employed, i'm
i'm so fucking. tired.
i swear to god i'm going to use my fucking food money i have now to get the eval, then i'm suing their asses for purposeful malpractice and malicious intent. i'm fucking ready to stop being a doormat and start being a god damn PROBLEM
because it's getting exhausting to be told that adhd isn't a disorder and some fucking karen level whatever the fuck dpn means (the others refer to her as fucking rn not a real doctor) apparently knows my body better than me after seeing me 15 minutes at best 4 times a year but hahahaha what do i fucking know i only know meds made me sick, said they did, was told to talk to my doctor about it because i was on it for years and knowing full well that holy fucking shit that was inappropriate and i talked to them and the doctor said STOP TAKING THEM and she's panicking and i'm
i'm tired.
everytime i try to do things for myself to get better i'm slapped in the face with 'fuck you fat bitch no one cares give me your money' and that's it.
school.
mental health.
home life.
literally i'm so fucking stretched thin that mr fantastic would be jealous. elastigirl is taking notes.
im dying.
i can't pretend i'm not anymore. i can't play it off as a joke anymore.
i'm serious. this isn't just being dramatic. i am literally dying and i can get NO FUCKING HELP with it.
i'm ready to just give up. i mean, what's the point anyway.
the world's gone to shit, i'm destined to be in a job i hate forever because i can't handle the mental strain of being self-employed, i'm
i'm so fucking. tired.
i wish i were aliven't somedays
Posted 4 years agoTW: Blasting depression, suicidal thoughts, feelings of worthlessness, emotional and physical abuse on main. if you don't want to read it, don't read past this. if you don't care, i don't either so don't tell me about it okay? okay.
story of my life right? i've talked about it plenty of times in the past, people told me i'm stupid or selfish or whatever but... in the end i'm not.
we're going to hit summer weather soon, and my family decided i lost air conditioning privileges. the day i failed the exam i was not prepared for, because the school i went to didn't have the materials i needed.
i'm forever everyone's god damn therapist. no one gives a flying fuck about my problems unless they want to gather blackmail or gossip or laugh at me. but you know, i'm everyone's mom friend. i'm the one constantly bending over backwards to help them out. be it with art, with life, with everything. i fix everyone else's problems while my own end up falling through the cracks as stupid.
i'm autistic and my family treats me like every stereotype under the book, and that's just the ones that believe in it. i'm just 'r*tar*ded to everyone else.
i'm lazy.
i'm ugly and worthless.
i'll never amount to anything.
so i don't deserve anything.
i pay for everything of mine. i mean everything. i never ask for anything but.
i still ask for too much.
i need out and no matter what gofundme or what the fuck ever i try to raise, no one cares. no on really cares. i'll bend over backwards for everyone except giving them a place to stay because whatever hell they're leaving would be better than what hell i live in. but do i tell them all the places THEY can go? yeah. do i donate to people for everything out of money that i've taken hours upon hours to earn? yeah.
do people care if i just disappear all together? no. no not really.
all i can do is pay by the skin of my teeth to exist and be hated for it by the ones who are supposed to care.
i'm in so much physical pain all day every day that you'd think that'd be punishment enough, but no. i gotta be emotionally broken.
and then have family who doesn't care. doesn't give a flying rat's ankle. nope not a one.
can't even get half-assed gaslit apologies when they drive me to go to therapy and my therapist has cried once for me already.
but no one cares enough to say i need to get out or gets me out they make hollow promises though. so many hollow promises.
it's easy to promise everything then shrug when it doesn't happen.
who cares if the doormat gets forgotten. who cares if the free therapist isn't around. there's millions just like her but they're prettier, they're smarter, they're more muchness than she'll ever be. she's a failure and always will be.
that's me. the failure.
that's all i'll ever be.
somedays i wish i hadn't failed ending it all. that now i wasn't afraid of causing myself more pain and my family any further 'bothers' by just letting it all go you know? it'd be a hassle to pay to get my fat ass removed and bills and all that. but hey at least the student loans would be forgiven and no one would pay for anything for me ever again. but still. dying is expensive, too.
i mean, if i were to just up and go the only thing people would lament is that they can't get access to characters i own or whatever. or that i owe art or money or whatever to whoever, probably. that's the usual general loop for me. i don't know anything else. i'm treated like shit but by a few people at best and then i always feel like i'm nothing more than a burden to them, too. because i am.
always was.
always will be.
i don't even know what to do anymore. if i were prettier maybe people would care more. or smarter. a better artist for sure, everyone would be dying to kiss my ass for that but no. no.
no that's not for me. that's not for people like me.
i've lost all energy and will to keep trying, guys.
i have nothing left. no drive. nothing.
this isn't covid depression. this is 34 years of it. i won't belittle anyone's sadness for any amount of time but i just.
i can't handle feeling anymore.
i don't want to feel if all i feel is pain.
i'm sorry.
update: if one more person yells at me and makes me cry again i am going to become a problem. seriously i can not catch any break anywhere. i get yelled at, blamed for everything, talked to like crap, treated like crap, but not my cousin oh no. the fucker with the criminal record doesn't get a damn smack for being an idiot and getting kicked out of three houses and five jobs in two years is an angel but me? nah. me the one who lost all of my jobs taking care of these assholes, the one who fixes all the bills, all the technology, all the fucking problems in this house. nothing. i'm literally just a fucking piece of trash here and i can not take it any fucking more.
update 5/17: therapy session turned out to end up with my dpn bitch karen of a doctor in charge of my mental health basically called me a liar, gaslit me in front of my therapist, and refused to admit that I do have adhd. my family won't admit to it even though they forced me to take the pills and shit and I'm livid. I mean absolutely livid. i was talked to like a child. again. treated like a child. my therapist, this doctor's boss mind you, was appalled and trying her best to deescalate the woman while i was shutting down mentally in that office completely. absolute shut down. i just stopped talking all together and stopped answering questions. i'm done. i'm fucking done. i am so worthless and i really wish to all god that i had help or somewhere to go but no. no i don't. so i'm stuck never being able to function as an adult because no one wants to believe me that i know my own fucking body.
story of my life right? i've talked about it plenty of times in the past, people told me i'm stupid or selfish or whatever but... in the end i'm not.
we're going to hit summer weather soon, and my family decided i lost air conditioning privileges. the day i failed the exam i was not prepared for, because the school i went to didn't have the materials i needed.
i'm forever everyone's god damn therapist. no one gives a flying fuck about my problems unless they want to gather blackmail or gossip or laugh at me. but you know, i'm everyone's mom friend. i'm the one constantly bending over backwards to help them out. be it with art, with life, with everything. i fix everyone else's problems while my own end up falling through the cracks as stupid.
i'm autistic and my family treats me like every stereotype under the book, and that's just the ones that believe in it. i'm just 'r*tar*ded to everyone else.
i'm lazy.
i'm ugly and worthless.
i'll never amount to anything.
so i don't deserve anything.
i pay for everything of mine. i mean everything. i never ask for anything but.
i still ask for too much.
i need out and no matter what gofundme or what the fuck ever i try to raise, no one cares. no on really cares. i'll bend over backwards for everyone except giving them a place to stay because whatever hell they're leaving would be better than what hell i live in. but do i tell them all the places THEY can go? yeah. do i donate to people for everything out of money that i've taken hours upon hours to earn? yeah.
do people care if i just disappear all together? no. no not really.
all i can do is pay by the skin of my teeth to exist and be hated for it by the ones who are supposed to care.
i'm in so much physical pain all day every day that you'd think that'd be punishment enough, but no. i gotta be emotionally broken.
and then have family who doesn't care. doesn't give a flying rat's ankle. nope not a one.
can't even get half-assed gaslit apologies when they drive me to go to therapy and my therapist has cried once for me already.
but no one cares enough to say i need to get out or gets me out they make hollow promises though. so many hollow promises.
it's easy to promise everything then shrug when it doesn't happen.
who cares if the doormat gets forgotten. who cares if the free therapist isn't around. there's millions just like her but they're prettier, they're smarter, they're more muchness than she'll ever be. she's a failure and always will be.
that's me. the failure.
that's all i'll ever be.
somedays i wish i hadn't failed ending it all. that now i wasn't afraid of causing myself more pain and my family any further 'bothers' by just letting it all go you know? it'd be a hassle to pay to get my fat ass removed and bills and all that. but hey at least the student loans would be forgiven and no one would pay for anything for me ever again. but still. dying is expensive, too.
i mean, if i were to just up and go the only thing people would lament is that they can't get access to characters i own or whatever. or that i owe art or money or whatever to whoever, probably. that's the usual general loop for me. i don't know anything else. i'm treated like shit but by a few people at best and then i always feel like i'm nothing more than a burden to them, too. because i am.
always was.
always will be.
i don't even know what to do anymore. if i were prettier maybe people would care more. or smarter. a better artist for sure, everyone would be dying to kiss my ass for that but no. no.
no that's not for me. that's not for people like me.
i've lost all energy and will to keep trying, guys.
i have nothing left. no drive. nothing.
this isn't covid depression. this is 34 years of it. i won't belittle anyone's sadness for any amount of time but i just.
i can't handle feeling anymore.
i don't want to feel if all i feel is pain.
i'm sorry.
update: if one more person yells at me and makes me cry again i am going to become a problem. seriously i can not catch any break anywhere. i get yelled at, blamed for everything, talked to like crap, treated like crap, but not my cousin oh no. the fucker with the criminal record doesn't get a damn smack for being an idiot and getting kicked out of three houses and five jobs in two years is an angel but me? nah. me the one who lost all of my jobs taking care of these assholes, the one who fixes all the bills, all the technology, all the fucking problems in this house. nothing. i'm literally just a fucking piece of trash here and i can not take it any fucking more.
update 5/17: therapy session turned out to end up with my dpn bitch karen of a doctor in charge of my mental health basically called me a liar, gaslit me in front of my therapist, and refused to admit that I do have adhd. my family won't admit to it even though they forced me to take the pills and shit and I'm livid. I mean absolutely livid. i was talked to like a child. again. treated like a child. my therapist, this doctor's boss mind you, was appalled and trying her best to deescalate the woman while i was shutting down mentally in that office completely. absolute shut down. i just stopped talking all together and stopped answering questions. i'm done. i'm fucking done. i am so worthless and i really wish to all god that i had help or somewhere to go but no. no i don't. so i'm stuck never being able to function as an adult because no one wants to believe me that i know my own fucking body.
medical bills, character resales, etc 2.0
Posted 4 years agoi am trying to raise about 500$ to pay for medical bills that have accumulated for the past three months including chiropractors, my personal care physician, prescriptions, the freestyle libre i have to use to check my blood sugar, and the gas i had to spend to get there (chiro is an hour away SOB)
https://toyhou.se/9196862.character-trade-purge
these characters are almost all available for cash offers.
i am trying not to take on new commissions as the medication i am on is fighting each other and doing any sort of artwork has become difficult for me. even playing any games usually ends up with my body cramping up.
i appreciate any and all help you guys can provide, even if just sharing the information.
if you would like to donate, my ko-fi is -
https://ko-fi.com/pancaked
or if you would like to simply donate through paypal, you may send through
https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/starfreckles
thank you again for your time, hopefully once i have managed to figure out what's going on with school i'll be able to start working properly again.update 2.0 -- medical, work, etc
Posted 4 years agoso finally done with all the mental health stuffs, got a new therapist etc.
now onto the actual physical health stuff. apparently i've been taking way better care of myself than i thought i was. not the greatest for a diabetic with no medicine to keep blood sugar under control, but i'm still at the a1c of 12.8. i was able to get my blood tested and see my pcp finally after 2 whole years since i had some money come in and i was able to get everything checked out. or at least partially. in the three months to follow i'll be under strict medication and diet, which is going to be hard as eating diabetic is very difficult when also suffering from so many mental factors that make my bloodsugar go fucking crazy
i have a freestyle libre now, my gramma's been getting them sent to her constantly but she doesn't have a smart phone and they won't stop sending it, so she just let me have them all!! meaning i don't have to upset my neuropathy or fibro to check my blood sugar anymore, even if they're only 86% accurate. it's close enough to not risk hurting my hands.
people keep yanking me left and right to do things outside of my home so i haven't been able to do any art at all, which infuriates me. i'm going to do at least ONE PAGE tomorrow since i have to see how this thing's going to effect my motor functions anyway due to the fact it gives me random muscle pains in my bicep due to where it's placed. it's not nearly as bad as it could be.
i'm still trying to get my bloodpressure under control, as i have so many factors that will affect my kidneys if i'm not careful, and my chiro is no longer a thing for me until i can figure out how to make another 100$ for the next four sessions.
i'm still in the process of getting licensing done, I have to wait for correspondence from the board now as opposed to the school so i can schedule the test and then finally get placed in an internship properly.
things are moving along, even if very slowly.
i appreciate everyone's patience, and to those who have been keeping up with me on my health... thank you. i don't have anyone here who understands or doesn't treat me like i'm anything more than a tool or some kind of free labor at this point, so when people poke me on twitter or here in comments, even if i don't get to respond to every single note or message i get, it does bring a tear to my eye because i'm so overlooked and uncared for as a whole.
i'm trying to get better so i can get my head in a proper place and back to work.
i appreciate all of you so very much, thank you. i can't say it enough. i'm sorry for all the ups and downs of this last year or so, it's been bad for all of us thanks to this damn panorama and dealing with my own medical and being told about all sorts of crap that i may or may not be. people like diagnosing me with everything but never providing enough medical proof and paperwork to where i can actually get proper treatment.
so knowing you guys are willing to help or offer advice really does help, especially if I do actually have BPD on top of everything else. i don't want to end up a danger to anyone (not that i have alters that are dangerous, i just worry that blacking out randomly might put me in a car wreck or worse you know?) or myself so everyone who has been trying to help has been a blessing.
love you guys, i'll try to keep you guys posted here as much as i do on twitter. it's easier to update twitter since i generally keep it short and sweet there from my phone. fa doesn't like my phone much.
