hello, i am posting again about my dog's vet bills

my mom has become rlly stressed by the sudden loss of finances, and she's been taking it out on me which has been rlly stressful.

pls donate if you can, even $5.00 is an enormous help
if you can't donate, please share so I can help afford the vet bills for my dogs procedure.

https://gofund.me/7d307a447
https://gofund.me/7d307a447
https://gofund.me/7d307a447

https://gofund.me/35cd953d8

Hey everyone, my deaf pitty Zelda needed a sudden procedure on an abscess on her neck. She's fine and in recovery at home right now while I'm out of town, but the vet bill was $1,300 and it was a massive hit to our household's savings. My mom also had to do repairs on her car this month, as she's a rural mail carrier and she can't work unless she can drive her car.

Any donations would be a massive help to us, but sharing is also extremely helpful to spread the word.

Hello !!

A few weeks ago, I got notice from the disability office that my hearing for disability benefits is in October, a few days before my 25th birthday. For me, this is likely the final stretch to finally getting the help I've been applying for for almost 3 years now. I have a really strong case for my autism and DID, and being able to have health insurance would absolutely change my life for the better. I've never been able to get medication for my mental health conditions, or go to the doctor when I am sick. Which is really scary for me especially.

It's a bit bitter sweet, but once I get on disability I will probably be taking less commissions than I did before. I can't make too much money in their eyes, no matter how unlivable the benefit amount is bc "if I am making money clearly I can work a normal job", and another part is that I've been doing commissions basically since I turned 18 for affording everything. from bills to food, etc. And it's been a huge privilege to draw for people and earn enough to just make it by with other people contributing in the house, but it's also very exhausting ahaha.
I don't remember the last time I truly even made TF art for myself, or gotten to think about TF related OCs and the like. It'd be nice to get to do that after I settle the payment stuff out.

ofc this is all a big IF I get the benefits after the hearing. I'm confident though, so are my lawyers!! Wish me luck.

I do have some cool commission auctions on the horizon before then though haha, I should be posting one soon!

Hello, firstly I wanted to say thank you for all who entered the raffle!
I'm by no means some like, ultra popular furry artist but 1000 people is a LOT to be supporting me, It's almost more people than lives in my town pff. It means the absolute world to me, as Art is my one true passion and reason for going :D

I put all of the entries of my raffle into Wheelofnames.com, shuffled them all so the extra entries weren't all beside each other, and spun the wheel!
So congratulations to the winner  simplyspoon !! :D Can't wait to see what fun thing I get to create for you.

If you didn't win, it still means a lot that you were interested. And there will absolutely be more raffles for more milestones in the future! :D

Thank you all so so much for 1000 followers :D It means a lot, and it's a milestone that I genuinely never thought I would hit!
Here's to more TF art this year!!

tomorrow I'm going to randomly select the winner, so if you want to enter the raffle please do so asap!
It is totally free, you can win a real life keychain AND a free 3 step sequence

DISREGARD MY LAST JOURNAL I HAVE AN ENORMOUS BRAIN AND THOUGHT UP A SOLUTION

I just need to double check that it follows TOS bc I forgot there were raffle rules for FurAffinity and I would rather not get in trouble. lol.

I wanted to celebrate my 1000 followers with a raffle of some sort, but now that I'd finally finished my comm queue I have 14 left until 1000!!!

Should I make it a raffle that does until like, 1500??? or should I just make it a very short raffle ahaha. What are your thoughts?

I have not ever gotten so much support from any community for my art like this, I love you TF Furry community you are the greatest and you've changed my life so much. qvq


I think I know what I want to do for it, a special raffle of sorts that would give someone extra goodies that'd be shipped to them.
But if anyone had any ideas i am all ears :3c

Heya! This isn't an emergency or anything fghfhg. I was just talking to my partner about a type of gender TF I've seen a few times but ofc, when i go to look it up I can't find any examples!!

It's Gender TF, where the partner end up swapping genders (like the boyfriend turns to a girlfriend, and the girlfriend turns to the boyfriend) typically during sex but I suppose it doesn't have to be during if I can find some in general fghfhg.

https://bsky.app/profile/peachcream.....le.bsky.social

I'm not moving, just trying out a new place to add a second gallery to my list

Oh and also I uploaded a bit to Buzzly if anyone uses that too
https://buzzly.art/~PeachCreamsicle

Also if you have a bluesky please comment and let me know! I want people to follow :D

Hey so after looking on twitter and discussing it with other people, it looks like this isn't an approved decision by Sciggles at all and Mods on the team are fucking over babyfurs behind her back while she's in the hospital with a bloodclot :) what the fuck !

If other Babyfur artists could let people know, things hopefully will be fixed and reconciled after Sciggles recovers.

https://x.com/Sciggles/status/1836509363458183465

If I literally did not need this place to survive I'd be so out of here man.
FA Mods have been cracking down on SFW and NSFW age regression, Babyfur, Diaper, and ABDL art. Which is just fucking ridiculous.
I tell you this is the cycle of internet puritanism. First they get rid of "underage looking characters" even if they're adults and "unevolved pokemon" and then they'll push it to age re, abdl, diaper art, and then they'e gonna start getting worse and worse. What's next? Going to start banning feral TF artists too?? it's fucking ridiculous.

This isn't a tinfoil hat moment, it is a RISING trend on so many art sites lately. Happened on Cohost, Pillowfort, etc.
I suggest siding with the people losing their platforms and their livelihoods for drawing diapers and pacifiers before they come for your kinks next and tell you that you're just as bad as real life animal abusers and predators.

Anyways, in response to this and not wanting to get banned for drawing a sfw picture of a baby in a diaper I'm removing anything having to do with agere and diaper art in my gallery. I don't get to draw it for commission usually so it'd not as big a deal, but I'm a hardcore age regressor in real life and follow a TON fo babyfur artists here so it still hurts. I've already seen 3 people I follow straight up leave.
I'm noting the commissioners to let them know I'm removing the art and providing them with a place to save it :)

As always, I have a discord server where I post my art including that which furaffinity is weird about like shortstacks and now I guess age re / age play art.
I'm planning on overhauling the server soon so you can just use roles to pick which niche themes you like to see (tf, pregnancy, general kink, sfw, diaper art, etc etc.) https://discord.gg/N8JKSABKCP

I'm trying to branch out to other places? If anyone has suggestions where a big, booming tf community is please let me know. Transfur.social is a fine place but it's really small. I tried Buzzly.art, similarly tiny :( so it's difficult!

2024 has been by far, the hardest year of my life. A lot about my life was permanently changed, things that have sadly changed the trajectory of my future and my artwork.
I have been disappearing a lot this year, taking large gaps in between communicating with customers or posting commissions that i owe. Regardless of my explanation below, I take full responsibility for not being available to communicate and taking so long to finish your commissions.
Never once have any of you ever been rude, pushy, or even upset despite the fact you had every right to be. I really appreciate that and it means the world to me. All of you are so kind. I can genuinely not express how cared for and appreciative I feel about this.


TLDR;

My wrist injury I got in last August, I am at the point where I believe it is permanent and not going away. I will have to re-evaluate how to take and manage commissions here from now on.
My mental health reached so low I was almost hospitalized twice in June, I was not because we were too poor to afford it, but I am doing much better now :)

I also lost a cat that meant a lot to me very tragically, and had been taking time to grieve.

The long version I've broken up into sections. So much has happened even just in the month of June, that I feel like this is easier to explain.



WRIST INJURY

When I was in elementary and middle school, I was an athlete. I did Taekwondo. It was my entire life, I went 6 days a week and did every tournament. When I was 12 or 13, I had to stop because my knees were swelling to the size of watermelons and I was in excruciating pain all of the time. Went to the doctor, and after an MRI found out I had Tendonitis in both of my knees. He did not check everywhere else at that time, but to be diagnosed with that so young was pretty bizarre. I had to quit Taekwondo, he said it was destroying my knees. It sucked to hang up this giant part of my life forever, but it had to be done.

When my wrist injury started September of 2023, I thought it was my carpal tunnel from drawing so much. It's happened before. Kinktober 2022 had made it flare up. But then it persisted, flared up in BOTH wrists, and got worse and worse until I realized it didn't hurt where carpal tunnel usually hurts.
And so I looked it up, and realized it was the exact spot you feel Tendonitis in your wrists. I have 4 different wrist braces, take about 9 to 12 ibuprofen a day, used Diclofenac gel on my wrists and trigger finger daily, I do stretches multiple times a day.

I spent a lot of time the last few months doing nothing. Unable to draw, or type, or game, or write. Things that I center my life and identity around.
Now I can draw for a bit every day, typing this is not hurting but I know I'll have to rest afterwards.
The same thing that ruined my ability to do Taekwondo, is now ruining my ability to create. It's spiraled me into a really dark place. It feels hopeless at times, like I'll have to give up the one thing I'm good at.
but I'm persisting. I can't give up art, I just can't live without it. And my progress and pain management from even December 2023 to now, July 2024 is completely different. Even if I don't know a day without pain anymore.

I haven't seen a doctor since I was 13, so I can't confirm it, but I'm certain ALL of my chronic pain is now tendonitis and not arthritis. it's scary, but I hope one day I can afford to go to a specialist and they can do anything to help. I fantasize about getting wrist surgery or, getting a medication that makes my wrists feel normal again. Or like, any of my joints haha. I walk with a cane because of my hips and all that, but that's been normal for me since 2020.


HOUSE ENVIRONMENT

In December 2023, my mum's best friend moved in to stay with us for 6 months, I was promised she was not moving in with us. I have nothing bad to say about her, she is very sweet and has been super empathetic to me.

But like me, she is also disabled. And is in the house constantly. I had to grow used to her being in my house and, i found out halfway through her staying she was actually moving in and my mother had lied. Being lied to by her was really really upsetting to me, the night is hazy but I had run away and stayed outside until it was dark.
It's hard to articulate why it hurt so bad and why the idea of living with another person made me so sick, because at this point I actually MISS her friend and desperately want her to come back. She's only gone for the summer, so at least she'll be back!
but. It's so hard to explain to a nonautistic person why making changes to my safe space without any say in it is so taxing, even if i like the change. I kept waiting for summer, knowing she was gonna spend it in a different state. I was happy to have some time in the house to myself and my partner again!

but the literal day of my 8 year anniversary, my Uncle cussed out my grandparents that he mooches off of, and my mum let him stay with us. He had pneumonia, and he was just supposed to stay until his antibiotics went all through his system. And then he got better, and didn't leave. He just slept in our living room until 6pm everyday and it made all of us uncomfortable.

Eventually someone in my system asked our mum 'hey when is he leaving, we are really, really not doing mentally well and we need our routine not to be disrupted so we can rest." And she basically said she was worried if she didn't let him stay, he would end his own life. Totally ignoring the fact we admitted to calling two inpatients and being denied because we couldn't pay for it. But we told her we'd try to wait it out.

Every fucking day I was having panic attacks, contemplating SH, and at my worst looking for more inpatient places around because I couldn't take it anymore. My cats were all sick, as I will expand on in the next section, my Dog was forced to be locked in her kennel unless I took her outside int he Texas heat (she didn't even want to play outside it was so hot.)
All because we were scared of like, making him uncomfortable i guess?

2 days ago she kicked him out, because he asked if his daughter could stay for a week and she asked if he could do it next week instead. that weekend was her birthday and she wanted the house quiet. So he cussed her out really meanly and, I gathered all his shit up on the porch for him and locked the door until he came to get it.
She also told me he had blown through 3,000 dollars worth of her life savings bc she gave him an emergency credit card. THAT'S 3000 IN LESS THAN TWO MONTHS MAN.
He has a problem with drugs and I have a feeling it has to do with that. But he told her he hoped she died and said to have a terrible birthday and life so. Ugh. it was a mess.
It was hard to do anything in the house while he was here, he's such a scary and uncomfortable person to be around. You have no idea how relieving it is that he's gone now. I feel like I've finally let our a breath I've had sucked in since my 8 year anniversary with my partner.


THE CATS

At the same time my uncle was here, we got our cats spayed! We live in the middle of nowhere in rural Texas, so our only way to spay them was at a feral catch and release spay.

The night BEFORE we were taking them to be spayed, this outdoor cat who slept on our porch (affectionately named Princess Tokyo Drift) had BABIES IN MT PILE OF SQUISHMALLOWS IN MY ROOM AT 4AM ASVNJFNDBJGNJBKGKN
so now we are taking care of her and her two kids: Clutch and Diesel, until we can get them spayed and neutered and then adopted. So there was that.

My other two cats got spayed and everything went well, but then they got respiratory infections. We took the most sick to the vet, got her fluids and medicine, and then had to take the other two (one of which who didn't even GO bc she had been spayed years ago.).
by the end of it, we had to go to the vet 4 times in a two week period. I was hand feeding my cats water and food through a syringe because they wouldn't eat or drink on their own. All of this, plus taking care of babies, plus my uncle being there and being awful crescendo'd into this awful climax where my beloved cat Tricky passed away very suddenly on the way to drive her to the vet.

She was my first cat, she was only 3 years old. They did CPR on her and there was nothing they could do. It still makes me tear up to think about it even now. She wasn't even the one who got spayed at that awful place who, clearly did not care to quarantine sick cats. it was and still is totally devastating.

I loved her so much, we rescued her the summer we moved here and I had to bottle feed her because she was orphaned too young. She always jumped onto my shoulders to lick my hair, she was a really good girl.

My other two cats, Deracho and Kirara, are healthy and fully recovered from their illness. I could not be more thankful, that was one of the most painful times of my entire life with everything on top of each other like that.

As the internet states, I have spoken of my cats and must now pay the cat tax. Below are pictures of my cats, all of them are healthy and alive in these pics so you don't need to worry about that: https://images.squidge.org/album/6xaou


FUTURE PLANS

Where does all of this stupid mess leave me?
My wrist injury had deeply affected my work, and all of my life stress was severely killing my stomach for kink art or NSFW. Things are steadily improving now, but I don't think I can ever approach my commissions the same way again.

I have to think on what my next move is more before settling on a plan. I am still drawing, this is my only source of income and I love drawing Transformation art for people so much.
All I know is, the next time I open commissions my queue will be less than half the size it normally is. I will be making much less money, and much less art. But it won't stop completely and that's a privilege I realise.

I've been fighting for government disability for over a year now, about a year and a half, with an attorney given to me by a nonprofit organization. One day I will get monthly checks and I won't need to do tf art to /survive/. I can just go back to doing it for fun when it fancies me. But until then, I have to find a way to make it work in the commissions world with my tendonitis.

THANKS

My wrist is finally getting sore from all of this typing, haha. But I wanted to take a minute to thank everyone who has read and, everyone who supports me.

I cannot express how much it means that everyone of you has only met me with kindness, flexibility, and patience. Even when you had every right to be unhappy with me. It means the world to me. I feel so lucky to have people like you all to support me.

In several occasions, your generosity has kept my family's lights on and kept us from being genuinely homeless. I want to keep making art for you, and count my blessings in this niche little community so often even when I am hiding away due to my offline life stress.

I want to figure out what to do to make creating artwork for you more timely and consistent even if I can only take 1 commission a week. Thank you all so much for all you do for me.

I've been tentatively coming back to working. Mostly I've been drawing fro a day, resting my wrist for two, and picking back up. Which is a lot slower than I used to but I have to train those muscles back. And frankly, I'm just happy to be able to draw without significant pain at all.

Still working on sketch commissions owed! In fact after posting this, i will post the ones I've finished. I hope Teru will answer some notes for me tomorrow since I have a couple of them!

December I will also have two YCH's, I might have to stick to that format through January since it's less work on my hands to edit a YCH base <3
So I hope that you will continue to support me and my art as we are on the road to recovery! :D

Hello! Afternoon!
I wanted to update on my wrist situation a little bit. I was gone for a week, far far away from a tablet fghfhgf. It was really good for healing! I'd say my pain went from like, a 7 to about a 3.
I'm continuing to do stretches, lift weights to strengthen my tendons and muscles in my wrists, and figure out what may have caused this. Right now I'm thinking its a combination of not stretching, drawing too much without breaks, and also the chair I had been sitting in. I've had it since I was. literally like 13 :blob_sweats_anime: maybe a little older but still. And it'd been really worn down the last year or so.

So I've gotten a stretching routine and gotten a new chair. While I was at my grandparents, I tried to doodle on paper. a 15 minute doodle left my wrist sore for the next 3 days so. I'd say I'm not quite ready to jump head first into drawing again. But I'll be doodling, testing my limits, and working up to it.

Thank you for your kindness and patience while I navigate this injury :pray: I am going insane wanting to draw, but I'd rather have my wrist work for the rest of my life u know. not something i wanna pretend isn't in pain fghfg.

I've been struggling with a carpel tunnel flare up on and off for a the past two months. It's been really painful and distressing, and after two days of trying to work on commissions when it started feeling ~ alright ~ I fucked my wrist up all over again.
I am upset by the fact I can't do anything, and I can't make money either. But if I continue trying to push through it I could end up ruining my hands for the rest of my life? Which is. super not worth it rip.

The 15th I'm staying in a family member's house while they're out of town, and I'm coming back the 24th. I'll be spending that time really recovering my wrist / hand and hopefully by the time i come back, it will feel normal again but we'll see. Thank you for understanding <3

I wanted to believe that the change in the ToS would only temporarily affect commissions but I have certainly noticed a huge decline in the traffic on my work :( I am so so thankful for everyone who continues to support me and it means the world. Especially since this is my only way to get income while I wait on Disability to approve me (could take years, I started to apply back in Feb)

I have a not so great history with Itaku but, I see a LOT of furries using it all the time. If there's a pretty active TF community on there, I'd consider posting there in ADDITION to here (not leaving FA)

I tried Inkbunny, I don't think it's for me. The UI is just... It feels so impossible to navigate fhghfg.
And Twitter is just. well, it is what it is.

if anyone knows a TF based mastodon instance or an instance that has a community I might do that ? :0 I love the instances I'm on but i don't post TF to them.

Me when I have an RSI,,, I am working on commissions still but, I have to pace myself a lot because I don't want to do permanent damage to my drawing hand rip. I managed to mostly colour 2 today though! And everything in my queue is lined now!

Come join me in my discord server! It's where I'll be posting full images and stuff that I can't post on here because of the site policy update<333 We have a static blacklist, Pluralkit for systems, and chats for talking and sharing art/gaming/nerd stuff!!!

https://discord.gg/N8JKSABKCP
https://discord.gg/N8JKSABKCP
https://discord.gg/N8JKSABKCP
https://discord.gg/N8JKSABKCP
https://discord.gg/N8JKSABKCP

i woke up to 5 different journals of artists leaving and moving to IB or twitter
sobs

they just destroyed their website im just so upset

im making a discord rn so at least i can post stuff there for all of you

My anger has sort of dissolved into existential dread about their vague policing bullshit on "child proportions" when they r considering shit like pikachu and yoshi to be "child proportioned"
This is my only source of income right now, I have to wait 6 months at least to hear back from disability and I might not even get on it right away and half to fight another half a year.

There's not really anywhere to pack up and go, that will guarantee people will be interested in my niche. I'm just at a total loss of where to move forward and what to do. It's terrifying! Thank you FA Admin team, you're so great to your userbase <333 /sarcasm

I won't be leaving or anything, I literally can't afford to. but I might have to branch out so I can keep making all of the art that my commissioners want to comm from me.

If anyone has suggestions on where to go as far as places with a Transformation kink community that'd be really nice to hear. Please don't suggest InkBunny, I can't move there since I have a focus on humanoid porn and they don't allow that.

I only mention this update affecting my work because we are considering "unevolved pokemon" to be TOS breaking now, or small cute pokemon because they are "child proportioned"

So I may not be able to continue doing a large handful of pokemon TF, which really saddens me.
I might also have to stop doing Short Stack commissions, but I asked FA admins what they think about that.

I totally understand wanting to make this platform safer, but I STRONGLY disagree that judging things by how small and cute they are or "child proportioned" they are is not the way to do it. Anyone who looks at a pikachu and says "this is clearly meant to be a child" is insane. I'm really tired of this sort of fictional minor fearmongering thats been going on a lot of platforms.
No one in their right mind thinks unevolved pokemon are 1:1 real children, they aren't even babies. They are. unevolved. There have been several "old man" starters throughout the show so <:)

I know plenty of people, some of you commission me, who have pokesonas of unevolved pokemon like charmander. Sorry you won't be able to commission porn of your own sona now, I guess?
I also know plenty of artists, who make their living off of drawing, whose art style is cutesy and will get accused of drawing things too "child proportioned".
And what does that even mean? lol? Are we basing it on height? On breast and dick size?
And if that's the case, is the 16 year old Jojo character with giant chiseled muscles okay in porn, but not 18 year old Honey senpai from ouran??? like. I just don't get it. Where's the logic.

If you also feel strongly, especially about the "unevolved pokemon being banned" i encourage you to open a ticket and share your thoughts.
I'm also not really in the mood to debate my feelings with anyone so if you try to convince me that pikachu is minor coded and porn of it is bad I. Probably will just laugh and hide your comment NVKFJNDBGKJ

I've had a cavity in one of my wisdom teeth almost 2 years. It luckily never hurt but I was worried about it, and I finally found a place I could afford to get the tooth removed!
I got my extraction done a few days ago, and got back home yesterday from it (I had to drive to the city and spent the night with my grandparents to get the procedure done)
I'm very sore and can't eat much but otherwise happy it's gone! I'm still working on commissions Everything in the queue is sketched, and about half of them are fully lined so! As soon as I'm able to eat better and thus pay attention better, I will be steam rolling through those <3


Reminder that I have a SFW, non-kink art account where I'll post OCs and Fanart (when I have the free time to do so) here  bunnies-n-oleander !!

 bunnies-n-oleander
I remade my old sfw account because it was a ghost town and full of old art I don't like anymore.

This will have a lot of stuff on it, probably my OC art and fanart bc I draw a lot of that in my spare time.