Hey all!

It has been another week(s). Sorry for missing last week, but with everything going on, April is officially my least favorite month right now. We've gotten some money troubles, our neighbors are throwing rotten food at our door, and all the little niggles of life are just weighing down, but life goes on. Maybe one day I'll have a good week, God willing.

But! I've still not missed a single day at the gym, and I'm now down to an increasingly svelte 208- I've almost lost a complete 40 pounds, and I'm really keen on seeing more progress- I've gotten more definition in my arms, confidence boost from friends taking notice, so that's nice. You may have also noticed I finally got around to posting commissions- again, I'm so sorry for the delays, y'all. If anyone has any questions about their commissions, don't be afraid to drop me a line- I'm always available to field an answer.

With that said, I wish you all well, and thanks again for the support!

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Christ almighty, what a week.

I know I've been complaining about the way my weeks work for a while, but this one was a lot.

First of all, Toby's surgery was this week- and thankfully it went off without a hitch. A few days later, Toby is practically back to normal, barring a shaved leg and a few stitches. To everyone who supported us and sent us well-wishes, thank you very much- you all made this ordeal a lot easier.

Secondly, I filed taxes, and the government despises freelance or self-employed workers and creators, so right now I despise the government. This was matched with needing to reapply for our apartment's lease and my schedule going right to Hell because it was Holy Week and I'm a good Christian boy. So stress levels were high all week.

Of course, ya'll want to know how the bodybuilding is going- good news is, despite everything, I've shaved off another two pounds. I'm very certain that, at this point, and at 213 pounds, I'm starting to level off- I've lost nearly 35 pounds and clothes that haven't fit in months or years are now comfortable and flattering, and I'm seeing definition in my arms and chest. I look better shirtless, and I've been feeling healthier.

Like I said, it's been a week. Hopefully it's the last week like this, God willing. I'm ready to get back to work, and again, I apologize for the delay in commissions- with Toby's surgery and the rest of the week derailing my usual schedule, it was chaotic, to say the least.

Take care all, and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all! Sorry for the late journal again.

My run of not great weeks continues, unfortunately- I've been better on getting commissions out the door, finally, and I'm feeling more confident in my output and should get something out before Easter Sunday. We've got Toby's surgery this week, so that'll be weighing on my mind as well. Thank you all, by the way, for your support on that front.

However, otherwise, things are going alright. It's possible that I've finally plateaued, as I stayed at 215 pounds despite sticking with my diet. I have noticed a bit more definition in my arms, and some noticeable improvements in my shoulders, as well- all great. I've also been doing better with cardio, so I'm still feeling good- even if I could really use some more sleep, haha.

That's all for this week! Soon I might start confident enough to post progress pics, but, ah. I'm not so sure it's what people would even care to see.

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all!

This was... a week. Good news first: I'm now down to 216 pounds and we're really off the charts as far as when I was last this weight. At least since college, I think. However, wow, was this not a good week aside. I strained my hamstrings which meant I couldn't really uh. Walk. For a few days. And then that was followed up by a very nasty stomach bug that really did not go easy on me. I still managed to power through all my workouts, (Yes, I was careful- with only my hamstrings pulled I didn't need to worry about chest, arms, or back) and still feel really good about where I am, just, you know. Discomfort.

To my commissioners, I am very sorry I missed another week. This time I'm blaming it on my stomach bug, that messed me up good. Thank you for your patience as always, I promise I'll make it up to you very soon.

Thanks and take care all,
-Renard

Hey all, sorry for the late update again!

This past week had uh- some distractions. Some donut-shaped distractions. (It was Silver's birthday) But I am still losing weight, slipping under 220 pounds for the first time in years. I think I've got another 10, 15 pounds before I'm done shedding fat, so it should be another few weeks.

It's been a rough time of it, though- March has never been my month. I actually forgot about Daylight Savings Time, and that messed up my schedule. I am getting commission work done, I am sorry for the delays again, but you'll see more stories from me before the end of the week.

Thanks again as always, take care,
-Renard

Hey all!

Well, this has been a week. First, good news, related almost entirely to my working out: I've lost another 3 and a half pounds, I am at 221.6, which means I am at the lowest weight I've been since the beginning of the pandemic- Hell, it's the lowest I've been since I started weighing myself seriously after college, and it looks like I'll still lose at least another ten pounds before I start slowing down on weight loss and start building back up with muscle.

The rest of the week was not very good, if I'm being honest. It was a hectic time, and admittedly I can't really talk about a lot of the stuff that happened, as it didn't directly happen to me. But what I can talk about is some bad news from Toby's latest vet appointment- for those that don't know, Toby is my dog- well, our dog. He's got a tumor that needs to be removed, and such a thing isn't cheap at a time when money is tight for me. If you all would like to help, Silver is doing a growth drive featuring the latest wolf flavor of the month, Lobo from Last Wish, which you can check out here: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/51332555/

For my part, I've still got all my commissions- I'm sorry it's been a long wait, but I will get stories out this week. I've got one lined up already, and more will follow after. I really appreciate your patience and support.

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all! This week has been crazy, so, to my commissioners, I apologize again for the delays. Emotionally, it was a roller coaster- I had a pretty somber anniversary that had me emotionally unplugged for a bit, and then Dad's birthday, and then Spring cleaning hit, and me and Silver deep-cleaned the apartment for a few days. My diet hit its first road bump because I had a few engagements I couldn't get away from, but it was a break approved by my trainer- and I still lost some weight! I'm down to 225, which is the lowest I've been since, uh. 2020.

Looking at the way my body is, I'll be shedding off pounds probably for a while yet- I imagine once I hit 210, 200 pounds, I'll start putting on more muscle from there. Even though it's been a hell of a week, there isn't much to say besides- thank you all for your support, and I'll check in next week!

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Late again, but with good news- I reached a new milestone of 227 pounds, a loss of 20 pounds. I haven't been at this weight for a couple years, and people are starting to take notice- which is gratifying. I've gotten a few compliments on my arms, which I love.

I've also entered into a love/hate relationship with running. It's the most straightforward cardio I can do right now since they're renovating the pool, so it's far from my first choice, but I've managed a goal of running a mile under 9 minutes- doesn't make me Usain Bolt, but it does make me the fastest person I know.

Beyond that, I'm sorry I haven't posted anything just yet- it's been a hectic week getting Patreon out the door and some projects reaching their due dates for Blackwarren Books, but I am hard at work- hit me up if you have any questions!

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Oop, little late on this one, but we press on!

This past week had a few personal milestones. I'm feeling confident enough that I can start throwing out some numbers- for the first time in, uh. A couple years. I'm below 230 pounds- which means I'm getting close to me target goal of 220 pounds. I also ran a full mile- actually, by the end of this week, I've started running miles at around 9 minutes, 30 seconds, which isn't going to turn heads at the Olympics anytime soon, but for someone who has always sucked at running, it's been very gratifying.

But of course, I'm not doing this to get fast, but get stronk. The workouts are becoming more and more familiar, and I dunno- I'm starting to see a body in the mirror that's starting to look better than what I had. I'm in a good place with it right now, as far as my body image is concerned.

I'm also going to be getting commissions out soon- these weekly journals are another little reminder to keep me on task.

Take care all,
-Renard

Hey all!

Lost another 3 pounds this week, for a grand total of 16 over a month. Exercises are getting easier now that I've settled in at a new gym, and I'll have some interesting stories to tell about this place- there's, uh. Some colorful characters that go there.

Beyond that, thanks again to everyone who helped me fill up my commission queue! It's time to get to work, and I hope to get at least one story out a week- but I think I'll be able to manage more than that.

It's a short one this time around, but then I know the Super Bowl may have grabbed some of you this Sunday.

Take care,
-Renard

Thanks for the interest, everyone! I've compiled my full list, even added a spot, and I'm going to do my best to get these out as quickly as possible. I'll be in touch soon!

Holy shit I actually made it for my first month.

So! Had a pretty good week this time- lost another 3 pounds. I'm really starting to notice it in my middle and the fact some of my pants are starting to slip if I'm not careful. I'll probably be losing weight for another few weeks before I start building back muscle, but hey, it's all part of the show. I've moved to a new gym because Planet Fitness is the Walmart of gyms and I cannot stand the usual people there. Otherwise, just truckin' along.

Though in other news, I will be opening up for commissions ~tomorrow.~ Look for that announcement if you're interested! I'll be using forms this time around to keep everything neat and organized, so I hope that'll work well.

Thanks for your support as always everyone, take care!
-Renard

Three weeks in, and still going strong! No pun intended. Sorry for the late update again, but truth be told, this new venture has upended my daily rhythm. Five small meals, plus my supplements, 30 minutes of cardio, every day, and the workouts. It is a lot! Who knew bodybuilding was, y'know, hard? It's still early days, and now I've entered a real balancing act of my daily schedule to fit everything in. And it's leg day tomorrow, oy.

But this week brought with it its own victories. I reached my first milestone by losing 10 pounds, while seeming to get bigger arms- got my first "Hey, have you been working out?" at church today, which was gratifying. Otherwise, still keeping busy. I'm trying to reclaim my writing goals to keep my mind sharp and my commissions out at a regular pace. I should be able to open again soon, so keep your eyes peeled!

Thanks for the support though, folks.

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all!

A bit late, but my second week on this regimen is complete! I lost a little more weight, but I'm starting to finally see results with a thinner waist and a more solid chest- one of my goals. It's not a huge difference, but I'm starting to feel stronger and doing better with my workouts.

In other news, still chugging away at commissions, will be getting at least one out this week. This week overall was pretty uneventful, but for those that have supported me so far, thanks as always, and know I'm still going strong!

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all!

A lot of you were very kind and supportive when I mentioned last week I was taking a gamble on a proper bodybuilding routine, so I thought I'd make weekly updates, since some of you seemed interested in how I'd be doing. So, here's some updates:
-I've lost 7 pounds in one week, the result of a radically different diet
-I workout 5 days a week, plus 30 minutes of cardio each day
-I am supped up. Got my whey protein, aminos, fat burners, creatine- my trainer really helped hook me up.
-Right now, since some people asked, I'm doing this natural. Steroids are not part of the conversation right now.

As for how I'm feeling? Pretty good! There's no discernible change- yet- but I've been keeping up with the workouts, and checking every item off my list. I'm taking weekly pictures of myself to catalog the progress, but those'll be on a strictly need-to-know basis as far as sharing is concerned.

Now that I've gotten used to this new routine, I am determined to get at least one story out a week, so commissioners, again, thank you for your patience, I have been working on things, I promise. And I think that's everything! Thanks for the support so far, people. I'll let you know how this week goes!

Take care all,
-Renard

Hello all, and Happy New Year! Here's to 2023 being marginally less shitty than 2022!

I do apologize for the delay in the last four commissions I have in my queue, and to my commissioners, thank you again for your patience. I am back to work, and will be in touch soon. My work as an editor also continues, and if you're interested in what the new publishing house I work for is up to, check out our novels and upcoming anthologies, you can check out Blackwarren at...
The main site: https://www.blackwarrenbooks.com/
And on Twitter: https://twitter.com/BlkwarrenBooks

Besides that, for years now I've included a little profile on my FA about my interest in bodybuilding- "We'll have to see." Well, years later, I'm finally giving it a proper try- I got a friend now who's built like a tank and trying to go pro, and he's passing on what he's known to me. I'm all supp'ed up, got my workout regimen, and a diet that has seen me lose both popcorn AND strawberries, which is the real tragedy here. First of all, if anyone's looking to do a meal prep/healthy food diet, fun tip: spices are your friend! The benefits of having a trainer who isn't as wonder bread white as I am. Second, good God, how has there ever been a stereotype that bodybuilders are dumb meatheads, because I have never had to do so much math and measuring just to eat properly and it's making my liberal arts brain cry.

So yeah, hopefully I'll start resembling my fursona more closely in the future! Anyways, again, thank you for your patience everyone- I promise that I will have some new stories out soon.

Take care,
-Renard

Hey all!

Just wanted to send along my best wishes for a happy holiday, but also just letting you all know that I will be absent for a bit as I travel up north to celebrate Christmas with my family in Michigan, starting on the 21st. I will still be posting scheduled Patreon uploads, but otherwise I will not be able to post any more commissions. I will be working hard, and I have four people left on my list- I'll be in touch while I'm gone, so no worries there. Thank you all for the understanding, I will be back on the 28th!

Take care and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all! Well, if anyone's down south, you've probably heard about Hurricane Ian. It looks like it's going to do some damage, so this is just a quick update that there will be a delay for commissions while Silver and I get the place ready- and, of course, the likelihood of there being a power outage. Stay safe if you're in the area!

UPDATE: I've just closed commissions and I've already set up my list! I cheated a little bit because I did get a lot of requests (Thanks, everyone) and added two more for 8 total. I'll let everyone who reached out to me know.

Hello all! I've just finished off a batch of commissions and I'm ready to tackle another set. Just like last time, I will be opening up for 6 story slots. I'm going to keep this open for the next 48 hours so I can make decisions- newer clients and patreon clients will be taking precedence, as well as anyone I had to let go last time, but I'm aiming to be open again soon if you don't get picked! Please, drop me a line if you're interested.

My going rate is still $15 for every 1000 words, and now, I have a new Terms of Service to give you all information about my do's and don'ts, as well as my general process and policies. Read it here!

Thanks for reading, take care, and God bless,
-Renard

I am now CLOSED. Thank you everyone for the interest, I'll be open again soon!

Hello, everyone!

Thank you all for your patience and, for a good chunk of you, thank you for your support, either as patrons on Big Stories or some of my commissioners. Well, the summer has been very busy so far, but in a good way. I'm not exhausted and no longer hate my life, but I -am- ready to get back to what I love. I've got some personal projects that have been shelved for a long time, so I've got plenty to keep me motivated. Here are the details:

-My rate is $15 for 1000 words
-I am opening up for six slots, to be chosen at my discretion
-I specialize in muscle growth and weight gain, as well as fantasy adventures, but I am open to doing other forms of growth and adult situations, within reason.
-I DO NOT, however, do any of the following: Gore, Incest or Underage relations, Vore, Bestiality, Slob, or Watersports

Please, let me know with a DM here on FA, or, if you do have me on social media, feel free to drop a line there!

Thanks and God Bless,
-Renard

...Made glorious summer by Florida's sun.

I'm finally free! School has ended and I never have to go back to that insane asylum. I do apologize for going radio silent in the last stretch there, but it really was an absolute slog. More teachers quit, more mental breakdowns, there was a shooter scare that had us all reeling (no actual threat, just one final, crowning act of stupidity from the administration) and a horrific stretch of working through my breaks, lunch, and staying late. But it's over! It's all finally over and I'm free. Now, here's what's going to be happening next:

European Vacation
Starting June 3rd, I will be on a ten-day cruise of the Rhine River- this was a vacation my folks and I actually bought all the way in January 2020. We, uh. Had to let it go for two years due to obvious reasons. But we're going now! It's actually supposed to be a rather leisurely trip, so I fully expect to have plenty of time to get writing done, so there should be no delays in any projects. Which leads me to...

Commissions
I know I still have two commissions left, and I am very sorry for the delay. Thank you for your patience, and I promise, I will get them done by the trip's end. Also, I will be re-opening for commissions shortly after my birthday on June 14th, so if you want a story, I am very happy to say I will be open for business once again! Speaking of business-

Big Stories
The Big Stories Patreon has been my side project for years. Many of you know that my first partner was Conner, God bless him- it was a big blow to lose him, but then a lot of really good friends helped me out- a year later, you all have been so generous with your support- I'm so glad you guys love the stuff Silver and I have been putting out! I feel bad that I've felt a little strained even on these recent stories, but I promise, now that I have room to stretch out and get back to what I love, the best is yet to come!

And for those that don't know, I am not going back to a teaching job next year. I'm quitting. Instead, I'm going to throw myself into freelance writing, which now means Patreon and my commissions are going to be the bulk of my finances, instead of the side project they've been for the past five or so years. To those that enjoy my work, you've made it possible for me to take this shot, and I really can't thank you enough. It's still rough for a lot of people, but here's to better days!

Thank you all and God bless,
-Renard De Fleureaux

Darkly comedic title.

So, uh. We had a bomb scare at school. And yes, I know how it looks posting this on April Fool's Day looks, but I promise, yes, this is a thing that happened. Recapping from Twitter:

It took them eight months, six middle school teachers quitting, countless acts of violence committed by students AND staff, but my school has finally decided to act like an actual fucking school. And all it took was a bomb scare.

Now, like a few other really fucked up situations at the school, there are things I can't say. But long story short: Yes, I'm fine. No, no one has been hurt. Yes, the police did get involved, and yes, a student was arrested. We- the middle school team- were sent an e-mail late Wednesday night. A student was scared for their life because of multiple tiktok and instagram posts where a group of students were warning/threatening everyone that "people will be punished" Thursday at 2:15. Specifically, teachers' classrooms were targeted, including that of yours truly. Yesterday was a grueling affair- students were talking, parents were panicking, and the police took ten kids in for questioning. Nothing was found on campus, and we weren't in any immediate danger. The main ringleader was a student in my homeroom. He's since been expelled. Before the police got involved, we were certain this was just a really bad joke, but now, not so much. So, there we have it. My school finally did the right thing, but only in the most extreme and dire circumstance. One gold star on a tally blanketed in red x's and frowny faces.

As far as I know, no, I don't think this kid had any serious malicious intent- or rather, certainly not murderous intent. I think he wanted to scare people and might even have something like fireworks or a flare gun. Part of me kind of has to believe it because this kid is 11. Right now, half the school is effectively taking the day off and I'm joining them on Monday for a long weekend. The administration in all this has said nothing to us, by the way. Yes, they acted, but they didn't tell us, the faculty, a damn thing- we only know what was going on because the scared student came to us, first. And yes, as we are the teachers and responsible for the students' safety, I think informing us is kind of a given.

I can't wait for this school year to be over.

Thank you and God bless,
-Renard

Hi.

2022 is only barely into its second month and it already sucks.

But no, y'all probably want the tea. Well, call me the Sons of Liberty, because I've got a lot to spill. Being a teacher in 2022 has to be one of the most thankless jobs I can think of today. It is not a profession for people who are serious about educating children anymore, and so the only people that actually want to be teachers are woefully naive or idealistic about what it's actually like (see me, circa 2019) political extremists (I've seen them of both stripes, both of them are fucking worthless), people who don't have anything better going for them, or retired teachers who are unable to enjoy their retirement and are thus going back to the only thing they know.

None of them are the type of people that are properly equipped to deal with the Herculean task of undoing the damage online teaching has done to these children. A lot of my students are just broken, and I'm not trained to help them with the disconnect. I've never seen kids act like this. For context, I personally teach 6th graders, and there are things I probably legally can't write on this journal because they're going to be part of sexual harassment investigations. But the things I can share include sadly usual behavior, only heightened: bullying, fighting, suicide threats, and mental breakdowns. And problems part of the current year: students making instagram pages objectifying teachers (including me), doxxing teachers (including me), false accusations of racism and inappropriate behavior (not me) and harassing teachers outside of school (thankfully not me.) The kicker is, none of these kids are expelled. Expulsions reflect poorly on the school, you see. Or, in one case, the child has a parent with school board connections.

Then there are my fellow teachers. I've watched five Middle School teachers crash and burn; one lost his goddamn mind and attacked another teacher, three just straight up quit in the middle of the year, willing to pay the $5000 fine of breaking their contracts, and another one, just today, doing something I really can't share because it is, again, part of a sexual harassment investigation.

The job is shit, and worst of all, the administration is fucking useless when it's not actively being antagonistic to its own staff, and they don't fucking care about the kids. They say they do- that they will do whatever it takes to help the kids- usually when they're inconveniencing their own teachers. They will pile on our work, they will demand we come in on weekends, stay late, and change our lesson plans, all for the student's sake, and yet my Principal will boast about his ability to tell people exactly how much money each student brings into the school, and then cancel whole classes, not for the students' sake, but to avoid making them take exams knowing some will fail, so the school's reputation is not damaged. They also refuse to discipline the students or even make the effort of holding an assembly to bring them to task for their awful behavior, because they've deemed them "ineffective." Not that they've ever tried to test that theory.

It's such a monstrous parody I have, several times, considered turning my experiences into a script for an ABC sitcom, but more and more it feels like a particularly dark and bitter episode of South Park.

Of course, many of you will recognize that February last year was a particularly grim time for me; I lost my best friend Conner around this time, and yes, I'm sure that's not helping my mood, but I know I'm not the only one who that weighs heavily on, so it's a small factor. This started out as a way to explain my continued delay with my commissions, but everything just came tumbling out. I hate what this is doing to me. I feel myself becoming more irritable, bitter, and tired. I have less energy. I have trouble remembering things and keeping up my daily routine. I want so desperately to be free, and I fear what I'm going to be like in May.

Naturally, some of you may wonder why I'm even still at this school. Good question. Very good fucking question. First, I'm under contract- I leave, they charge me $5000 and quite possibly blackmail me in the county. Second, at the end of the school year, my contract stipulates I still get paid through August if I see the year through- three months, full paid vacation. It would be extremely useful in helping me get on my feet as a full time writer. Plus, a steady paycheck for the next six months means I can save up a considerable amount.

But can I make it? God I hope so.

That's all for now. I will try. I promise. I'm working on a commission right now, but I'm just barely getting Patreon out the door. I thank you all for your patience and understanding, and as usual, if you have any questions, comments, or concerns, please feel free to DM me.

Thank you and God bless,
-Renard

Hey all,

First of all, Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I wish you all a good holiday, good food, and good times- I want to thank all of you for your continued support, especially my commissioners and Patreon subscribers- soon, you guys might be able to help me break out of my soul-sucking job, and for that, I will be eternally grateful.

Which does lead into the other thing- my commissions. Those of you subscribed to my Patreon know that we've been pretty good about meeting deadlines, but to my commissioners, I can only apologize. No one's reached out to me, so that means you all have the patience of saints, or you just out right forgot you commissioned me- either way, it is appreciated. I'm so sorry I've been mostly radio silent. This week, I've mostly been in recovery mode- otherwise? It's the school, guys. Students suck, admin's been getting weirdly hostile, and if you all are in the know, you'll know that we had a teacher quit/get fired after he threatened students and staff with a weapon. So. That was fun. I've never had a year this bad- which, given my track record, is saying something. But still, I shouldn't have been leaving anyone with delays. So, to all my commissioners still waiting, I am discounting the price by 25% for your wait. I can do better- and I want to maintain a professional standard if I'm going to go freelance one day (hopefully soon.)

I've gotten a few messages of concern and well-wishes, and thank you for those. It's been a tough year. I had a few personal tragedies that hit very hard, but this job. Man. The world needs good teachers, and I hope I am one, but I just can't do it anymore, not after this year.

Thank you again for your understanding, and if you do want to cancel your commission, please let me know- I'll understand.

Again, Happy Holidays, and God bless,
-Renard

I'm sorry I'm back on my bullshit.

This is the third year in a row this has happened, one would think I would learn. School's hitting me harder than I thought it would, which means that no work has gotten done on commissions. The long and the short of it is that, like many industries, there's a huge labor shortage at the school, which means those of us who are working, are being given more responsibilities and duties than our jobs actually cover, so most days I'm run ragged and working late. I've got some great prompts to work with though, so I am still motivated to finish- I just beg your patience for a while longer, everyone. Thank you, and let me know if you have any questions or concerns.

Take care and God bless,
-Renard