...needs to be putting YCHs / Adoptables / Reminders in their own section on the front page away from the rest of the art because they take up over half of the front page constantly and it's so annoying. Preferably at the bottom to not bury everything else that isn't art as it is. At the very least, please ban reminder posts entirely to cut out at least half of that spam.

The only "he" left in me is me going "heehoo", I'm on HRT :3

Just a reminder, among a sea of reminders, that I too am on Bluesky! I joined up last year and have been cross posting almost immediately!

Recently, I cleared out my Twitter for good, end of an era I suppose.

https://bsky.app/profile/rowdythecrux.dev

As mentioned, I've put a lot of thought into my 2024 goals, here they are~!

Major goals
These are the big ones, the ones I absolutely want to get done, in order.

1. I want to raise at least $6,000 - This will be split 3ish ways, ~2k to help cover debts, ~2k to invest in art supplies (new tablet, printer, cutting tools, etc), and ~2k to serve as savings for emergencies. The 2k for supplies is a rough estimate, I will detail what I'd like to get below. I intend do this asap, by whatever means most effective. Current plan so far is to crunch as long as needed over January / February on art until I reach this goal.

2. Get into a better workflow - As I mentioned in my 2023 recap journal, one thing I struggle with is trying to balance art with other demanding tasks such as programming or design, I want to avoid getting into workflows where these are overlapping each other, which seems to affect my focus and or my overall performance. I want to be better about sitting down to focus / complete a single large task at a time rather than picking away at them piece by piece and have reserved time each week where I can work on unexpected issues that otherwise delay current tasks, leading to a huge delay in everything. This also stops me from being able to do things like art streams because I am unable to properly plan things.

3. Display my efforts / accomplishments better - Related to the above, a problem with the way I spend my time is that often I spend time working on things that ultimately feel invisible. Things I do that I am proud of that I am unable to accurately portray to others. This is not a matter of ego, I don't need praise for every little thing I do, but what I need is some tangible evidence that I actually did something rather than this mush of time spent because I continue to get into mindsets of feeling lazy / unaccomplished and it affects my morale.

4. Start a blog - I want to start a blog on the topic of gaming and gaming communities. Community is a very important virtue in my life, and its relationship with gaming is a subject I have a lot to talk about. I want to take my years of experiences and put them on paper (metaphorically). It is a subject of great personal attachment to me.

5. I want to make a game - My end of year goal ultimately is to make a game. Even if it's some short, simple, little nothing game. I want to be able to say I've made something and not be too scared to do so. I've made mods before and know quite a lot about game design, so I want to do something. I know full well I don't have the time nor the means to make anything amazing "yet", so it just has to be something to get me started down the path, get some experience.

Minor goals

1. Continue getting in shape - I have been good about dieting and exercise, so this is not worthy of a huge focus, I've already made great progress and if I continue on the path I'm going, it'll be perfect.

2. Find additional ways to make money - While the easiest solution here is to just get a job, I don't have a reliable means of travel so my options are limited. I have been coasting along so far by keeping my expenses as low as possible, but it would be nice to not have to worry so much...and also...afford things. I was working on setting up a nice side activity but it needs far more startup cash than I am willing to invest right now and would put a lot more work into my schedule. Discouraging but I'll figure something out.

3. Become nerdier - I am too obsessed with work as of late, but I am too aware of how boring it is to really geek out about it, so I feel like I've been coming off too quiet and distant as of late. Makes me feel bad, I want to be more openly nerdy and gush about my activities more.

4. Get better at art - Pretty obvious, I feel like I get better every day, but I do want to take the time that I can to really push myself, try new things, do better.

Here we are again, which is funny to say this because I basically never do these. 2023 is over and here we are at 2024. What did my 2023 entail? Somehow it feels like a lot and a little at the same time.

The bulk of it

I worked, a lot, I feel like I always working on something. Either on a design, a program, a bug, etc. I spent the first part of the year working on scritchworks mostly, I started building a new site at the end of 2022 to host art and somewhere along the way it became the idea to try and host my art independently from myself. After that, I tried going all in to really focus on art and while I don't think I did "great", I am at least happy with what all I did.

I had artist alley tables at three different cons last year, FWA, AC and Furpoc, the last time I did that was 2019 and then covid had killed all of my momentum. The bad news is, it didn't really work out for me in a way? I didn't make a lot of money, most cases I spent more than I earned, and I didn't really get much of a name out there. Before Furpoc, I affirmed with myself that if I didn't at least break even, I'd give up on trying to make art work and focus on something else. I did however, technically, break even. The good news is, I definitely enjoyed being there and meeting people~!

I've always been stuck in a spot where art takes more time to do then I get back from it, but because it is often my only decent source of income, it's been a difficult thing to walk away from. Even now, I really don't want to, I just want to be realistic as to where I can possibly be going down this road. The other difficulty is that my time is usually spread out across a variety of projects, but not of the same type. Meaning, one moment I will work on art. The next, a website. After that, a mod, something that needs to be fixed either urgently or not. Because of this, I haven't really made much time this year for myself or leisurely activities. If I am not working on *something* I am wasting my time because more things will continue to pile up.

But all that said, it's been a good year. The only real downsides were unexpected dental adventures, but the really cool upside is that I got to move in with my boyfriend! It's been quite an adjustment in a whole new place, but I really love him so it's all worth it.

Ultimately, I think I'm in a good place. I am healthy and haven't felt depressed and any anxieties are totally under control these days. Don't let my ranting about art and money fool you, I am not in a bad state, just frustrated? I have outlined a lot of how I want to tackle this upcoming year better than I ever have before, which I'll post separately, but for my closure, here is a fun tl;dr list.

TL;DR

- Moved in with fraeven <3
- Started scritchworks and separated my art into its own thing so I could keep my main self focused on other things
- Attending FWA, AC and Furpoc, did the artist alley at all 3!
- Been healthier, lost weight, better shape, etc
- Been happier, more myself, felt better about myself, etc
- Got to travel a lot with / thanks to friends and family, took assorted trips / day trips to places.
- Got to spend time with friends, meet people, the good stuff~
- Worked! Work work work work work work work work work work work

It crimmis

mery crimmus

Hello! I wanted to mention that over the next week or so, I will be moving some of my art pieces off of this account and onto my art account,  ScritchWorks. Anything that I delete from here, I will post on there, nothing is going to get permanently deleted. I will also make a follow up post with links of what I deleted versus where it can be found afterwards.

This account will be used mainly for my personal pieces, stuff I commission, and experimental stuff that I didn't feel like doing before because I was trying to use this as my "main" account. I will still keep fetishy stuff restricted to scraps if I upload any of it at all. Thank you! <3

I did mention it on my Twitter, though it was a pretty quick footnote, so I thought I'd take the time to elaborate on it here!

A few weeks ago, I launched  scritchworks! While I don't plaster it everywhere, it is *my* account, just branded under a different name / character. It's a bit difficult to explain, but the idea is that I am trying to separate my artistic pursuits from my regular ones. Art has always been part of my life and part of who I am, but there's a lot more to me that it's hard to try and juggle everything together.

So basically, ScritchWorks is where my actual commission art will be posted from now on. What about this account? This'll remain a space for personal art, as well art of my fursona! I apologize for the confusion, and I appreciate all of the support I have gotten regarding my artwork over these years, this rebranding is also meant to act as a symbol of my commitment to the craft and the seriousness needed to be a professional artist.

I wanted to post this a lil' bit earlier but I have been a *smidge* busy. I had some interesting news to share. For those unaware, I am slightly colorblind, I have been as long as I can remember. It was first brought to me in elementary school, I was made fun of (only briefly) for coloring in my oceans purple instead of blue, as I didn't see all too much of a difference. As an adult, it most commonly affected me with my artwork, I get green confused with yellow, white and pink, etc.

I've always accepted it and I was never able to pursue help for it, I've been told many times over that they make glasses for these things but I've never looked into them because of the cost. That is until Christmas, when my boyfriendfops gave me a gift-card to the Enchroma company. The reason I'm only posting this now is that because of covid, it was difficult to get an appointment at a place where I could see these in person before making a decision on a purchase. Eventually I gave up and just went for it.

So...now I have them! And...they work. That is understating how effective they are...I can't really put it into words how much it has changed my vision. First off, I know they work because I can definitely very clearly see the difference between that yellow and green, that white and pink, and so on. What I never realized was how, overall, over saturated the world was for me. I had gone outside and looked at the trees, and the sky, and my house, my road, things I've seen so many times. They looked so different, I can't say "normal", but everything before felt more like a cartoon compared to how they are now.

This is a pretty big thing for me, and I wish I could articulate what I'm feeling better, but I at least wanted to put it out there. I don't know how this will impact my artwork going forward, I took a look at lot of my work and found things I liked more, liked less, but I've always tried to keep things close to their original references with great success and I suppose I will continue to do the same. I do want to do more foliage though...

I uploaded some of my kink / fetish art to my scraps. I apologize if any of that isn't your thing, but it's totally mine and I can't be bothered to hide it anymore; there's a lot of garbage going on in the world to care about hiding stuff (That a ton of furries enjoy and are also being more open about it!)

Hello folks, I just thought I'd toss out a journal as I continue to collect my thoughts about art and where I want to go with things in the future.
Earlier this year I took a break from doing commissions, and it sort of turned into a break from art in general. Why? In summary, I've hit burnout. It happens to a lot of artists, and I am no exception.

To skip a lot of details, I realized that I haven't felt much joy from doing art in some time. I've been caught in this loop of working hard on trying to get things right, hating everything I've done, and then having to move on to the next piece again and again. Prior to this year, commission work was my main source of income. (Don't worry, I'm aware how silly that is). But when I was in the midst of it, I was jumping from thing to thing trying to make enough money to just exist that I didn't have the time or the room to think about how much I hated it all.

The long break I've taken has given me the chance to collect myself, but I'm not quite ready to get back to form yet. There are still a few problems I have to figure out.

1. I want to improve, I like to study, but I need to avoid the trap of hating every single thing I draw.
2. I need to get into a better workflow so I can take my time to create quality products, but deliver them at reasonable times while still making profit.
3. I need to work on marketing myself better; I enjoy the feedback I get, but I still feel like my overall popularity is so small time that I'm not really getting anywhere.

I hate to say right now, I don't know how to tackle these things at all. I've spent a lot of this year going over things about myself and I've been tackling a lot of problems. Art is just one of them and the only one relevant to this post. Hopefully I find that sort of "eureka" solution soon, as I so often do when I'm up against some monster of a problem.

I don't want to quit, even if it's an admittedly dumb path to go down, but if I can work myself into a place where I work for myself and make enough money doing so, that's all I want out of my life.

Hey I wanted to write this journal because this is something that's kind of difficult to talk about and it's been on my mind lately. I apologize in advance for anything here that sounds nonsensical but I am not great at articulating my thoughts.

So. I love my friends. I talk to a ton of people, and I have shared a ton of experiences. Some good, bad, great, awful, so on. I've had my own ups and downs, my really big ups, and my really low downs. One thing I know for sure. Because I love my friends, I know that low times are inevitable and that I try and so whatever I can do for them.

Why am I saying this? Okay so like, and hey this isn't targeted or addressed at anyone specifically, but rather anyone who feels this way in general. I want you guys to understand something super important.

Your burdens, your trials, your challenges. You are allowed to talk about them. You are not going to bring me down.

A few folk whom I speak with frequently have expressed this to me, I can tell they're not 100% up to snuff, I ask what's up, and I get met with something akin to "I don't want anyone to feel bad for me." Okay guess what dummy, I'm going to feel bad. I'm sorry, that's just how it is. Even if you don't tell me what's wrong, if I sense you're not in great spirits, it doesn't matter, I am going to feel bad!

And it is OK. It is OK because I asked! If you genuinely don't want to tell me that's fine, I won't push, but most of the time it is just out of genuine interest (and okay maybe sometimes it's curiosity.) But the point is, it's okay to tell me. It's okay to vent at me, you're not going to pull me down, or ruin me.

Understand it like this, I am grateful to everyone in my life who has ever been there for me, to have helped pick me up or keep me going. For the energy that was spent to get me here, so shall I return the energy to the world to get you there too.

Another thing! Maybe you may think your problems are trivial, and that in comparison to others, or my own, you're just being a burden. I understand where this comes from, and I will be honest that I have had times where it seems the weight of all of my friends problems may feel like too much. But I remind myself that there were times in my life where my problems may have been trivial, but to me they felt awful. At a time when I was lesser able to handle that stress, I buckled. Therefore, it is not my job to judge the quality of life you're venting about. I am just here to listen.

There isn't always a whole lot I can do, nor is there always a real "solution", but all the more reason for me to do what little I can.

One problem I've had, that I've worked on and still continue to do so, is that I just need to listen. I've learned to stop butting in and trying to fix it. I fix problems, it's what I get joy from, but people are not problems to be solved, bugs to be fixed. On the other hand, If you ask for my advice I'll give it.

Ultimately, please understand that if you need someone to vent at, I offer my large fluffy ears to do so. It is the least I can do. <3

It birthday :>

Remember back in March, what feels like eons ago, when I mentioned I was finally done with my art hiatus and ready to get back to work? Well. I'm going back on it.

During this original hiatus, my ultimate goal was to spend some crunch time trying to catch up on some projects, do some study and get ready to unveil my new prices. During that time, I did wind up taking some work here and there, didn't get a ton of time to study, but I did come back and redid my price sheet and everything. And then corona happened in full force, which was a pretty awful time to suddenly value my non-essential services higher than usual >w>;;

Now don't worry of course! I am fine! I am getting by and aren't in some super desperate need of money. But that said, I have decided I will not be taking commissions again for the time being. Because my con appearances have been canceled and there's not a lot of sales going on otherwise, it just makes sense that I take the time now to just get stuff done!

There's a lot of personal projects I still want to catch up on, there are still personal art things I want to do, practice I want to do, etc etc. I don't want the stress of having to catch up on owed work anymore while I take on some other tasks!

That's all I gotta say for now! Thank you for listening! ^w^;

Here are some small updates to my art hiatus!

I've spent the last few weeks catching up on personal projects that I've been slacking on, no slacking off this time!
I've also been practicing things exactly as I promised, looking for art techniques and idea to improve the look.

I've also been doing some research on badges, what paper to use, color settings and so on. The issue with color is that I am partially colorblind, and with all the badges I've done I have never really put it into consideration. I am hoping to do a few more tests to find what my ideal badge color / quality setup.

I finished up what design changes I want to do to my website, and will be building a mock Trello page to present my queue and my progress and so on. I had contemplated closing my Trello from public view because I actually keep track of several different ones for different reasons. Instead I will be keeping my sfw public one, but will be setting up a script to copy sfw tickets to the sfw and close them them when they're finished in the same fashion.

I will be returning back to full form very soon. The 16th even! Getting my prices worked out will be the final step. Tomorrow or later today I have another journal I want to post about what I want to do overall in my future, very excited to write that!

I'll start off with the TL;DR!

- I will be taking a short break from commissions soon
- I will be changing how I use my Trello, but haven't decided on how yet, read below for details
- When I return, I shall be tossing up a new price sheet with updated prices, more options, etc.
- I want to start selling more than just commissions very soon

And now for the details!

I will be taking a short break from commissions soon. The reason being is that I have been working what feels like non-stop for months now. I work on programmy stuff when I'm not doing commission work and everything I do tends to have some kind of deadline so I find myself working what *feels like* forever. However, this has been leaving me pretty burnt out, I continue finding myself struggling to catch up on anything and it's causing me to ignore schedules and just constantly keeping busy trying to do whatever comes to mind.

During this break, I want to catch up on non-art projects I haven't had the time to put my full attention to! But one important thing that I would like to do is take some time to practice some ideas, things I need to improve upon, and so on. One of the other things I must do is finish up the new design on my website, I have fine-tuned my commission management process but I need to put the pieces together basically.

With this, I am considering making a change to how I manage my Trello. Right now, my Trello acts as a tool to manage my commission process, and the progress is tracked (to an extent) on my main website. Right now I have two trello pages I am managing just for art, my main and one I use for NSFW/Kink stuff. It's a little anxiety inducing trying to manage both, as well as my other trellos for other web stuff...and three FA accounts...three twitters...I think that's really not helping my burnout...So what I think I may end up doing is put everything on one Trello and make it private, and use my website as the go-to link to send people so they can watch commission updates. (I tend not to upload WIP shots, I always think people just want to see the finished product, so in my new commission form I'd like to have a spot where people can approve the upload of WIPS and so on.)

And lastly, I will be doing another revamp in my price sheet! I did one around this time last year, but this time what I am going to do is focus more on presentation and help simplify options. I have new styles to offer, but I also need to adjust prices on some other things. I do not want to complain, nor make people feel bad for me or whatever; but despite my small increase in price last year, I have continued to be in a spot where I am spending far more time working than I am getting paid for. While my anxiety towards accepting money is still ever-present, my bills are as well.

My goals for this year are to really push myself artistically more, and try and establish myself better in the art community. I have also recently ordered a sample pack of stickers using my art style. When they arrive I will evaluate how my style looks on a sticker and if it works out I intend to start designing more and selling them online and/or at cons! I hope to start selling items other than commissions really soon if it all works out!

Thank you kindly for reading, and thank you for being apart of my journey and supporting me along the way. I intend to do everything within my power to be the best that I can be! <3 I have been too afraid to make any sort of major advancements in my plans, but I am hoping to fix that as soon as I can.

Hello! I am doing Holiday commissions this year as always, but the details are a little different than before.

I want to emphasize I want to do winter / holiday icons! Meaning, I am doing those first. Winter icon commissions submitted to me before December 6th, I will try and have done by the 13th. With these icons, I will have a free optional holiday addition should you want one, for example a santa hat, but also a plain version so you can use it for the entirety of the winter season.

You can view examples of this here and here, hat and no hat respectively!

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/33846649/ && http://www.furaffinity.net/view/33846868/

Second, commissions that are meant to be done for Christmas or earlier, such as gifts will be prioritized later in the month of December, so keep that in mind!

Note : I will not be doing fetishy / nsfw gifts for anyone unless you can provide prior examples of the person being okay with it!

Lastly, do keep in mind that my rates will be increasing at the start of the new year! However for now, you can find my commission info here : http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31436589/ And you can order your commission here! https://forms.gle/EHnc7Vw1L8MusYPk8

But wait! Do you perhaps want to try and win an icon? Follow my art twitter and retweet this tweet here! https://twitter.com/rowdys_art/stat.....81280617615362

Henlo! I have a quick announcement of sorts, here is a list of my upcoming plans.

1. (Side note) I have been dealing with sickness since the 30th of October, and it has put me super behind on everything, so first and foremost I am rushing to complete what I have due and getting back on track.

2. I will be opening up for commissions again soon, this time with a heavy focus on Christmas / Winter themed things. I will not be running a sale like I did for Halloween, however I will be running a sale on a new type of style I can offer.

My time table is such : Works meant to be gifts will be focused mostly around December, and works meant to celebrate the holidays / season will be prioritized to be done before December 1st. I would also like to offer holiday icons that will also have a non-holiday variant to be used for the rest of the general winter season!

When I open is still up in the air, it will be by the 15th at the latest, however I hope to do so much much earlier.

3. In January, I intend to raise my prices again! This I'm sure isn't really exciting news, but it is important! I spend an awfully long time working on stuff that doesn't wind up being a cost-effective use of said time. However, my talents have grown considerably better this year which is also a factor in both the time and the pricing.

I intend to wait until January so that I may offer one last bit of cheaper pricing ahead of the holiday season!

4. With this new set of prices, I will also be totally redoing my price sheet / website in terms of how I present what I offer. After giving it some thought, I realize I am not doing the best job of explaining what it is I can do, it will also come with pricing adjustments for different levels of work as most others do (Shading versus flat, etc)

That is all for now! Thank you for reading! ^w^

--Rowdy

This journal is 18+ only! It is also pretty tmi, I talk about sex stuff.

This isn't a "coming out" post but I guess a more curious one.

I've always considered myself bisexual at most. I've loved and have been with both men and women, and have never really questioned the details of it all. But one thing that's always been a thing is that I've never ... "been" with anyone. It's always been online, stripped down to naughty talk or pictures or the occasional webcam chat.

Webcam though...I've never really been too...interested. I've never been too sexually demanding, I've never /wanted/ to see anything. Curious yes, but I could take it or leave it. I know that I am at least a "kinky-ace", if I am ace at all. Kinky ace in that I do have kinks, and they do "work". So there is something at least.

Once it finally got to real world time, I noticed right away how difficult of a time it was to stay interested. How little "in the moment" I am. Kinky times are completely different, the seldom I've had them, I've enjoyed the experience quite well.

I've talked it out with a few close friends, all of which have told me how it's completely normal to only be attracted to certain things and not everything. I read a comic recently, a gay m/m one, and there of course some naughty action and it's the first time I've really ever looked at stuff like that, and I felt very uncomfortable. It was an odd feeling.

There's no ending in this journal lol, just me putting thoughts out there. I've seen people tell their story all day and this is as much of one as I have, it's still a work in progress.

If anything ever happens to FA, just wanna mention you can always find where I hang out from my website : https://www.rowdys.art/findme :3

Hey folks, it's been a while since I tossed out a journal about where I am what I'm up to and such.

I'll start off by saying this might mostly be personal boring emotional stuff so if that's not your scene it's all good if you skip this ^w^;

First. Why the heck is it already almost October? This year has been going by mega fast and I can barely find time to catch up. It feels like I'm always super behind on everything. There's so much I wanted to do this year that I simply haven't been able to yet and it's like aaaa.

I'm gonna be honest, I'm a little lost.

I've come to terms with something important, and that's basically that I'm scared. I'm too scared to do anything, try anything, push myself more than I have been. I'm worried I'll be wasting money, or that I'll be wasting more time.

I'm scared of not getting better, I'm scared I might actually get better and there will be a bigger expectation of me. I'm scared I'll be constantly working, and I'm scared I won't have any work to do.

Fear sucks because it limits you from doing anything. But at the same time, I do at least know my goals for certain.

1. I want to finish paying off debt, I have taken on a fair bit helping out family and just generally from not getting paid much.
2. I want to push my lineless art more, there is something missing, it needs to be better.
3. I want to push myself as an artist in general, there is always more to learn and improve upon, and every commission I take I get really anxious about hoping it's okay.
4. I'd like to be making enough money to where I can live decently, so I don't have to stress over every single little transaction I have.

That third one is a doozy, because I know it's what is making me not push harder for more work. I'm aware of perfectionism and its downfalls and all the other little mental traps associated with it but it doesn't make it any easier to fix it!

But I am trying. And while I am trying, I am really appreciative of those cheering me on and supporting me. In the grand scheme of things, I haven't been "depressed" as much as I have been more ... anxious. I do not blame the world for my shortcomings, I do not blame others. While life around me hasn't been easy and isn't making things any easier, I am still keeping my head above water.

Hey put Banana in the comments, those who skimmed this over or didn't read will be so confused.

I mostly wanted to write this not just for my own sanity, but as a letter for those around me. I know my friends are concerned and I don't do a great job of hiding it. All in all, I am okay. I know there will be an end to these bad feelings some day, I will get there.

I will say in positives, I already do see much improvement with my work this year alone. I have been able to learn some new things about myself, most of them great and others I'm not so sure about yet. I am overall much more relaxed and have had a clearer (not perfect, just clearER) mind.

Overall, I am hoping my next update whatever span of time from now is far better than this one, but I thank you all for reading all the same.

Yeah I'm going to the thing, whomst I'm gonna see there? Whoops I posted this pretty late huh @.@

It my brithday :>

Hello! I have made the decision this morning to keep my nsfw art and my sfw art separate. I feel uncomfortable sometimes when I do nsfw, even more so when it's kinda fetishy. It's hard to gauge what people like and dislike so I'd rather boil it down to, hey go here. This is different from my other not so secret account where it's personal fetish but yeah.

The new account is RumbleThump!

http://www.furaffinity.net/user/rumblethump/
https://twitter.com/rumblethump_art?lang=en

There's nothing here yet, but I'll be moving everything over pretty soon!

Gotta say, this is a nice feature added to FA. I know that like, historically I've been pretty against FA's security and practices and whatnot, but this is a pretty nice gesture for the community and provided everything is safe then it should work out nicely for a lot of people.